UPDATE:
Thank you all for your responses. After thinking a lot about it I decided that the best thing to do would be to ignore them. I am not very good at being nice to people that have said such hurtful things about me and to me. And after 15 years I am tired of it. So, after the ballet was over I sent my 14 year old to the lobby to say hello and thank you for coming and I following a few minutes later with my baby in her sling. They were standing near the door and as I walked by I told my oldest it was time to go. And then I walked outside and went to my car. My daughter followed me and when we got in the car she said that as I was going out side my MIL glared at me and said in front of my daughter about me, “well she sure does think she’s something else.” My FIL then said the same thing.
When my DH got home from work he told me that his parents called him at work after they left the theatre yelling and screaming at him about me. Not sure what all was said but he had to tell them he was at work and it was very inappropriate for them to call and give him trouble while he was at work. And he told them that he was not surprised I ignored them after everything they have said about me. So, that was that.
How did they even know about the ballet? If they don't know of these events and you don't invite them, then they won't show up. That's pretty simple. I have learned to limit the information I give to my mom to help eliminate some of the issues we have. It has made a big difference. Good luck.
I agree with Nancy. You should have spoken to them in a calm manner and let them look at the new baby even. Nothing bad ever happens from doing something good. Just throwing up your hands and walking off from your kids grandparents will be something that sticks in your daughters head forever. We don't always have the opportunity to walk away, sometimes we have to deal.... especially at work. Teaching your kids to walk away when they don't like the way something is going can affect their work ethic or the ability to work on their own relationship problems in the future.
I completely understand. I am so sorry that they treat you like this.
I hid all of this type of behavior from our daughter until she was about to graduate from high school, but she was way smarter and more observant that my inlaws realized..
I encourage her and my husband to see them as often as they like.. I have not spoken with MIL.. and not once have I wondered. I wonder how.. MIL is doing?..
I hope when my daughter finds the person she loves, I can remember to treat that person with respect.. I also hope her inlaws love her the way she deserves to be loved..
Good for you! Now just don't give them another thought. Enjoy your family and the holidays and the time you all have together. Happy holidays!
Good for you Mama. I wouldn't waste anymore time on that relationship.
I'm proud of you, standing up for yourself like that. I am one who can't keep there mouth shut I would have said something to them in front of my husband a long time ago:) If they want to see the grandkids send your husband after all they are his parents.
I have to agree with the majority and say Bravo you handled it well. Yes you could have stopped to talk but with what you have said it would have turned ugly and no reason to damper a wonderful evening for your daughter. Obviously your husband feels the same way if he responded the way he did. I'm sorry you have to deal with that and hope one day they will come to their senses and realize they are only doing harm by acting that way.
I say "Bravo" to you!!!!!!!
DH
I think you handled yourself with grace and respect. Good for you. I wouldn't have even wanted them to come. Ignoring them was probably the best thing to do. I mean really if you attempted to talk to them you have no idea what drama they would have caused. You were alone with all your children....so I totally agree and support you.
I would add that you need to tell your daughter and your husband not to repeat what they say to you. It was good that your husband stood up for you. Your daughter is at the age where girls talk about people all the time behind their backs. You can compare this to comments made by those around her. Teach her not to repeat negative comments. It just adds fuel to the fire.
Just think how nice it would have been if you didn't know what your daughter and husband heard.
