Childs Father Won't Give Me His Address

For one thing, just and FYI, you cannot withhold visitation because a parent is behind in child support. Many people see that as an option, but trust me, the courts don't see it that way.

Since he's only seen your son twice since he was 9 months old, it seems to me that you are trying to go by an old court order for visitation.
You need to file for a modification of custody and visitation. You will probably qualify for a fee waiver so that you don't have to pay court costs.
In your declaration, state that you wish to revise the order of the court dated___________ based on the following facts.
1) Visitation has been intermittent at best.
2) After long periods of no contact with the child's father, he is hesitant to give you contact information, including a residence address, when he does want to take the child.

You in no way wish to keep the child from having a relationship with his father, however you humbly ask the court to compel him to provide you with contact information and an address so that you can stay in communication with him in the event of emergency, etc, while the child is with him.

Provide a copy of the address he wrote down for you.
Attempt to have him served at that address.
If it is a bogus address, then you may have to attempt to serve him some other way. Legal aide should be able to advise you.

~ a side note: You say he lives with his mother. You don't know where his mother lives? Just asking.
I'm divorced. I've never had a cell phone. Land lines are considered acceptable contact information.
Living with his mom doesn't mean he's homeless, but you should have a good address. You may need to write him a letter.

In California, no modifications are ordered unless the parents go through mediation first. There is an exception.
It's called default.
That's where one parent doesn't show up for court hearings or mediation appointments and defaults, meaning the other parent gets the orders they requested.
I think the court would be completely understanding about your concerns over a parent popping up so infrequently wanting you to follow a court order that has not been followed by the absent parent.
Document everything. Get a calendar and write down every single day that visitiation is supposed to occur and doesn't because dad doesn't follow through. Document every conversation, phone call and exchange.
It's time for a check up with the courts because they have no way of knowing how things are going if you don't tell them.
It will take some work on your part, but it will be worth it.

Hang in there.

yes, he may have a court order so that he can pick up his son BUT he has to give you his verified phone number and address, if he refuses, or you find that he has given you bogus or misleading information about HIS ADDRESS, PHONE NUMBER OR OTHER INFORMATION, then you are legally under no obligation to hand over the child. do not let him take the child until you have a verified address, chances are good he is trying to TAKE the child so he doesnt have to pay you child support.
K. h.

First and foremost - take the jerk back to court! for child support and to amend where he is required to tell you where he is living (although I am surprised that is not in the papers). Keep good notes of when he does not visit and if he visits other than the designated times. Does he drink? drugs? thinking supervised visitation would be nice.....because you did not let him take him at the court designated time, he can take you to court for contempt but I don't see that he could win....if he does make sure you counter claim the non support. I don't think you need the reminder as you seem very level headed but your son has a right to know his dad - support or not - and you must focus on that. That said, I doubt the boy even knows who he is as infrequent as he has seen him....I will be thinking of you..

I would not allow him to take your son. I would be very suspicious of his reasons, after he's stayed away this long.

I would get a new court order, since it's been so long since the dad has expressed any interest in seeing his son. Then dad can see his son, according to a new agreement.

Why would you let this man see your son when he has not contributed anything for his support. He has only seen your son twice and gives you a bogus address. Spend time with your son is a privilege that he HAS NOT EARNED. Tell him either he stops being a dead beat dad and pay child support-back and future-or he can sign off on your son.

He is required by law to keep his current phone number and address current with the court and you. I would definately get in touch with an attorney or go to the law library and figure out how to file a motion for enforcement. I don't know legally if you can withhold your child from visitation because you don't have a current address, but I know I would personally not give my child to anyone unless I knew where he was going. Perhaps you can volunteer to drop your son off for visitation so you can see what the place is like and know where it is? Definately ask a lawyer about this.

PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE DO NOT HAND HIM OVER !!
I'M SORRY BUT I WOULD BE VERY SUSPISOUS AT THIS STAGE.
YOU & THE COURT NEEDS HIS SOLE ADDRESS ( not his mothers ) & IT NEEDS TO BE CHECKED OUT, IE: VISITED BY SOMEONE IN AUTHORITY, IN FACT I WOULD ONLY BE HAPPY WITH HIM SPENDING AN HOUR OR TWO AT YOUR OWN HOME WITH SOMEONE ALSO PRESENT. DONT BE FOOLED BY HIM & PLEASE DONT LET YOUR SON OUT OF YOUR SIGHT.
I WISH YOU LUCK xx

I would call the attorney asap and get a hearing in the courts. He has legal right to see his child and you don't want to end up in court for contempt. Although I think the judge would see it your way I would NOT want to take a chance the judge didn't like it.

Call child support enforcement today and get the paperwork started to have child support held from ANY job he gets. The employer is required to take it out of his pay before he gets his check and they send it in and the child support enforcement sends the support on to your.
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Also, since your child does not know him, supervised visits until they establish a relationship is a good idea. That way you are not involved in the visit but the visit is allowed to go on in a supported and supervised manner. The state will not do this for you if the child is not in their custody so be prepared to finance this option. A family member can meet dad at McDonalds and they can play and visit for an hour each weekend until they know each other better. McDonalds is not the best option, a park or playground would be the best.