5 Year Old

Updated on April 21, 2010
C.F. asks from Stockton, CA
6 answers

I have a 5 year old girl who HATES getting dressed in the am and at bedtime. Any suggestions on how to make it easier. It takes 2 of us to get the job done and is very intense with screaming and throwing a huge fit. very stressful.

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L.A.

answers from Minneapolis on

My son did this in his preschool years. Instead of fighting it, I would ptake him in his pjs, pack a bag with clothes and off we would go. Once we got to where we were going, he would decide that he did want clothes and then there was no battle with the dressing.

Try just saying okay and see how long till she decides to change. It's a social convention and not a health issue, so letting it go and putting the ball in her court may change things up enough to put an end to this dynamic.

For night time, it may be weird to you, but there is no harm with her sleeping in her clothes. Or maybe she could pick out some sleep outfit so it becomes her idea.

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M.F.

answers from Sioux Falls on

I have a daughter who hated getting up in the morning. Call it coddling, but I would start singing to her and turn the light on. She would get mad and bury her face under the covers and try to "burrito" herself in the blankets. I would then lift up the covers over her face singing about the beautiful butterfly in her cocoon. Then stretch 1st one arm while singing of her beautiful wings, then the other, until she was giggling and awakened fully. Then I would get her dressed alot more easily. It turned into a game, and we both have fun with it, when she pulls it, and she just can't stay grumpy when mommy is singing silly made up songs about her.

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J.B.

answers from Atlanta on

Are you letting her pick out her own clothes? I know sometimes this may lead to insane looking outfits, but many kids quit the "getting dressed" tantrums when they're in control. If she picks out something completely inappropriate (only underwear or a bikini in December), you can help her choose some better options -or add to the ones she's chosen.

If you're already doing this, explain that she cannot do anything else except stay in her room until she is dressed. Usually when I tell my son there will be no outside, playground, zoo or whatever it is -he gets his clothes on pretty quickly! If he refuses to put on pajamas he doesn't get his bedtime stories. He has slept in his clothes before!

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L.S.

answers from San Francisco on

My sister had sucess with bringing her daughter to school in her pj's (with a bag of her day clothes)...she started to get dressed after that. She didn't want the other kids to see her in her PJ's...discuss with teacher first, but this might help with the mornings!

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D.W.

answers from Indianapolis on

I like both Liz's and Julie's recommendations - mine would be the same as Julie's by letting her have a say in what she's wearing even if it's not the most coordinated.

We give our 3.5 year-old guidelines based upon weather and the day's events. Some days it's different than what we chose the night before, but at the end of the day there are other battles I'd rather fight.

Have you thought of using a timer, alarm, or other marker by which she needs to get dressed or there's a punishment of sorts? Losing a favorite toy, losing TV privileges that day, not playing with friends outside?

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N.P.

answers from Modesto on

She sounds tired. My boys go through this occassionally, but not every morning because they go to bed early enough now. So, first make sure she is getting enough sleep each night. It takes about 5 nights in a row to notice a "morning" difference.

Then usually a "sing songy" morning will help. Also a timer! Wake her up early enough too NOT run late while she lays in bed for about 10 mins. Then give her a chance to go pee and come and sit down. After all that she should be ready to eat breakfast, then get dressed with the microwave timer. Set it for 2 minutes (or something reasonalbe for her to "win"). If she does it every morning of the week...........she gets to go to McDonalds and get an ice Cream cone (or whatever) on Friday!.........

I've learned that getting dressed (or any chore) is alot smoother with a countdown. OK 3 more minutes until we get dressed.........2 more min, 1 more min,.......kids function better if they are prepared for what is expected of them. Try to count everything down for her to get her used to it. Counting down STILL works for me and my boys are much older :O)

Tardy's don't "count" in Preschool, but they will in Kindergarten, so it's great that you are trying to figur eout a way to overcome this.

good luck!

~N. :O)

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