Ok we hang out with my sister and her husband almost every weekend well my sister was on vacation for a week and they had his aunt and uncle in from out of town so we didn't hang out for two weeks so they could spend time with his family now I feel like they are acting/hiding stuff from us come to find out they have been hanging out with another couple who are friends with us as well but they have been hiding it or what I feel like hiding. we were at my moms saturday night for dinner and to use the pool (which they are staying there for the 2 1/2 weeks my mom is gone) and they kept texting this couple and wispering behind our backs but I did see it. Now the wife just started her own in home daycare which I have one too and I watch my niece well the first time we were talking about her starting my brother in law would make jokes about taking my niece to her well now I feel like that might happen cause my sister said that they stopped by last night to look at my bil new car and she wanted my niece to come over and play for a few hours today which is all my sister works cause right now she has one little boy and her two girls and her daughter is doing the adjusting phase and is bored she said. I have conflicting stories that she tells us and I'm starting to not trust her which is bad cause I really don't have friends more of a lot of aquantances. I've been so emotional and don't know what to do. Thanks for letting me vent or just write it out any help would be appriciated. I guess I should give more info for people are judging me thinking that I'm a bad person and won't let her have friends I said about a year ago that we need to make more friends and her response was you don't need other friends we don't have friends so I'm not mad that she is hanging out with someone else I am upset that she is hiding it behind our backs instead of being up front or just saying we've hanging out. They find one couple and attach themselves with them till they find someone else to hang with. It's my son and daughter that I don't want to get hurt cause they don't come over anymore.
Consider the fact that you may have been spending too much time with your sister. You both need other friends. It's not a competition. I wouldn't say anything or make a big deal out of it--this isn't junior high school!
Maybe the best suggestion is to find more people to hang out with. My brother is my best friend, and I hang out with him all the time, but sometimes it is overwhelming and I need time with other friends...
Join a pool league, a social hall, a mommy group.... find someone else to rely on for some good times and give your sister a little break... and don't make her feel bad about hanging out with other people, then she won't feel the need to hide it from you when she does.
My brother and I just got into a huge fight over this very issue, he smothers me, and he needs to spend more time finding other friends and doing other things... it was all just too much, and yes, I did sneak around with other friends, because everytime I would tell him about going somewhere with someone else he would make me feel horrible for not including him....
You and your sister can have different lives and still spend time together. It is healthy to have several sets of friends... even friends that don't know or don't like eachother...this way you can spend time with people all the time and noone gets overwhelmed or feels smothered.
Good luck
Well, just like I tell my kids, "They can be rude to you for a minute and then you are the one who lets them be rude to you any longer." I would say that this is a very sad situation and they are very sad people. I am sorry you have to put up with this and it is especially hard coming from family. Empower yourself and find other things to do. You probably have done something that was very small and it makes them feel insecure. You probably don't even realize it. My suggestion to you is to let them be your past and don't hang out there.
I think you need some self confidence and you also need to realize that people are allowed to hang out with more than one couple. You need to stop obsessing over this, or you will just push them away!
Strengthen your own life. Find other friends and interests. If you are spiritual look for guidance there. Eveything else will fall into place.
Good luck and hugs.
I would talk to your sister and tell her how you feel. Try not to let this go one. She is allowed other friends besides you and your allowed to make new friends also. Please just ask her to be upfront with you because you love her dearly. I would tell her how upset this stuff makes you . I would tell her its ok to have other friends but not to leave you out. Good luck
