No Interest in Sex

I know this sounds crazy, but you have to have sex to want sex. Get things started even if you aren't in the mood... The mood will follow... And you'll find that you're glad you made the effort.

Good Luck to you and The Husband!

from Mr. Cano,
Don't worry my wife has done it to me, too. You are going through a dry spell and its understandable. Once you're start again hold on hubby, you better be fit and ready.

Nursing and exhaustion wouldn't have anything to do with this would it? There's nothing like a little sleep and snuggling to help energize you. Also giving in whether you feel like it or not sometimes helps you feel like it more :) Find some way of getting more rest...you'd be amazed.

I posted something about this a while back too...I'm in the same boat. Its been six months and vary rarely do I ever feel like sex. When I posted most just said to take one for the team or try new things etc. Someone did post something about Maca Root. Its a natural herb that is suppose to help with fertility and desire. I haven't tried it because I am breastfeeding and i'm not sure if it would be okay to take. I looked it up online and I would be willing to try it in a few months when I wean my little one. They sell it at vitamin shoppe or vitamin world, probably any of those places. If you are breastfeeding some woman said that when they weaned their babies they found that their sex drive came back. I'm hoping that is the case for me too! Good Luck!

This is common. You are constantly being "fondled" by your baby and don't really seek any more attention. Plus, your hormones are out of wack. But, for the sake of your marriage, you need to stop turning down your husband just because you're not in the mood. You don't have to be in the mood to please him, nor to enjoy it. Plus, the more you have it, the more your good moods will start coming back to you. Discuss what's going with you ONCE so that your husband doesn't have any unrealistic expectations. But, don't turn him down most of the time. Give in and give yourself some time.

Have your thyroid levels checked... This is just one of the many symptoms. You made need just a boost to get you going again. www.thyroidawarenessmonth.com

I was in the same situation you are. I had no interest at all. I was always tired from waking and having to feed my daughter and to be honest it just didn't seem that important to me at the time. As moms, we are thinking more about our new babies than sex. I don't think there is anything to take over the counter, but you could talk to your doc. One thing my husband and I did was to start flirting with each other. Make time with each other throughout the day. Try to show physical love (hugging, kissing) and maybe the feeling will come back. My daughter just turned 3 and we are finally back in the swing of things. It will happen. Good luck.

Don't turn him down. Men NEED sex to feel loved. Just because you don't feel like it, do it anyway and who knows, maybe once you're into it, you'll get in the mood. If not, sorry, but it's taking care of one more thing that NEEDS you to take care of him!! I've been there. With the first one, I said no, didn't want to and we became soooooo far apart - who knows if he ever went looking somewhere else for what I wouldn't give. After the second, I did my wifely duty whenever asked. Sometimes I "got in the mood" during, sometimes I didn't - but I never let on I wasn't "into" it. Our relationship is soooooo much better just because HE felt loved!!!!

Don't turn him down. He needs to know that you still think he is the sexiest thing alive. He needs to know that having children will not end his sex life.

During the day, start fantasizing about a romantic place to be with your husband. Put on sexy lingerie, unbutton your blouse a few buttons, etc. So much of our sex drive starts in our mind, so you just need to give it a jump start.

You won't always be in the mood, but you can certainly get the benefits if you let your husband take care of you. Sometimes during sex, you might have to imagine him in a romantic place or doing something daring, whatever would turn you on. Then it can keep you in the mood.

Enjoy! And congratulations on the new baby! This little guy needs his mommy to be totally in love with his daddy.

been there it is call being very tired. we love our children but by the end of the day we are also very tired of dealing with everything that comes up. Have a day set aside where someone else has your child for the day and night. spend the day with your husband just watching tv, a movies going out to eat like when you were dating and go from there. this way you will also have some time with just each other. if you have a friend that may also be in the same boat see if you can trade off. maybe every other weekend for 2 times a month. they may need the time off also.....

Your body is probably deficient in some minerals, I'm thinking a naturopath could really help with that. In the mean time, it's ok to make it all about him for a night, showing him really how much he means to you and taking pleasure in giving him pleasure.

Don't know if this will apply to you but with my first I got on the mini pill because it was safe to use while breastfeeding. Boy did it do a number on my sex drive! So if you are on any birth control, oral etc, you may want to check out if lowered sex drive is a side effect. I only realized this because when I got off it I was totally into things again and it was such a relief! A good friend of mine was a newlywed and could not figure out why she didn't have more desire. She got off the pill and has been great since. It doesn't affect all women this way apparently but there is a pretty large percent of women that it does. I remember that it affects your testosterone in some way, but sorry don't really remember the details. But I will say that while I was nursing and struggling I did almost always go for it and would ultimately enjoy myself. The only thing I didn't do was actually pursue my husband sexually and that did bother him, but we still had a thriving intimate life which is very important regardless of how into I felt when we got started. But definitely keep trying to see what the cause is because it is much better to actually want to! Best wishes:)

My ob/gyn said you have to wait until your hormones get back to normal. If you are nursing you can not take any type of libido meds because they will throw your hormones out of whack and that will be fun for nobody.
If you have already weaned your child, go to your gyno right away and get some libido boosting meds and see how they work for you.

Please see your OB. It is probably a chemical that is low or missing on top of being tired due to having your baby. You for sure don't want it to go w/o being addressed b/c you and your hubby need that intimate time together!!

Talk to your doctor.

talk to your doctor. if he dosent help find one that will. you should go back to normal ( with the exception of a few scars) after the pregnancy. sorry your having a dry spell. i understand it happens to a lot of women...and men too. my hubby was weirded out by the birth experience. with time he got over it...again normal and in a few books I read.

Honey, I haven't had much either. I had to really take my focus off the baby and during the day I figured we would be intimate, I thought about it off and on and it seemed to get my hormones going some. Another thing that helped was to have someone take the baby for us. Without the baby there, I felt much more relaxed. Its hard to feel desire when you are tense! After a couple times of that, I was able to get the desire back with more ease. Its almost like it took some practice tries before I felt normal with it again.Good luck!

This mite sound cruel, but you must not feel too bad. Don;t know your age but I imagine you in mid 20's. Some counseling would prob do you good, having a baby should not put a "no desire to have sex", when you are married and in love, it is not considered "sex" it is "making love with the one you love", and making that person happy, don't put this off too long, bcz what a husband can;t get at home, he will get somewhere else, unless he is very understanding and masterbates so he does not have to go anywhere else.. and he can't do this the rest of his life! Is it bcz you are afraid of getting pregnant again, or did something happen during labor, delivery? Look in the mirror, ssk yourself some questions and, Sweetie, you have all the answers inside of your heart. Good luck and Good love!

There is NOTHING over the counter you can use. There are a lot of products that claim to have an effect, but there are none.

A few pharmaceutical companies are working on a female equivalent to Viagra. The problem is that they stem from different physiological issues, so ED (erectile dysfunction) drugs really don't work for women.

I have the same problem. It's been going on for a long time, and my husband is completely frustrated. We were about to start testosterone injections because my levels are on the low side, but they can have devestating birth defects if you conceive a little girl.

Our OB/GYN recommends just setting a date, letting him take the lead and hope that the interest generates from there. It doesn't work for me personally.

I'd ask your OB/GYN and would recommend having the conversation with your husband present so he can hear the advice (and perhaps a diagnosis of low testosterone) directly.

Hi There, While there are physical reasons to have a low libido the majority of the time it comes from a combination of physical and psychological. New moms are exhausted and rightfully so, our hormones and bodies have changed dramatically and takes time to recover. New moms may also look at themselves differently. Instead of a love machine we are nurturing mommies with our new bundles of joy occupying our minds day and night. What was once a place of pleasure is now referred to as a birth canal, lol. Take some time to rest, reconnect back to yourself, buy a new outfit with no spit up residue in sight. If your anything like myself, I got so caught up with being a mom, I pushed my needs aside (like taking an extra 5 min. to shave or even put on makeup) How can you feel sexy if you don't treat yourself like a Hot Mama Sexy Lady. Best of Luck, I think many of us have gone through this too :)