My Oldest Daughter Who Is 4 Still Wants to Wear Diapers and Plastic Pants

Updated on February 16, 2010
D.B. asks from Austin, TX
11 answers

Shall I keep them away from her? She has 3 younger sisters and I use those diapers and pants on them. She is already potty trained but she gets upset whenever I put them on the other girls,especially this pink snap on panty that goes with a diaper set her babysitter made for her when she was a toddler.what can I do about this?

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L.A.

answers from Austin on

Compromise is always good. Just set the rules up front.. I agree with letting her wear the pink snap pantry over her big girl panties, but only to play.. not to go potty in..

Tell her if she potties in them, that they are too old to wash so they will need to be thrown away (and then if she potties in them do it).. also explain to her tell her that diapers are expensive, so you cannot waste them..

It is a phase.. I am sending you strength..

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K.L.

answers from Dallas on

Can she wear those pink panties her babysitter made her without an actual disposable diaper? My daughter is almost 4 and my younger daughter is 2 and we go through this from time to time as well. However my older daughter does wear pullups at night so this does help. But somtimes she insists on wearing my younger daughter's padded training pants and I just let her at the house. I know she does it because it's something her sister wears and sometimes she'd like to be "little" again. I see no harm in this at all. It's a form of her pretending and being a little kid.

I wouldn't let her waste diapers you need for your younger girl's. But maybe she could also wear the training pants.

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J.T.

answers from College Station on

Sounds like jealousy! Maybe take her to Target or Walmart and let her pick out her own special panties. DON'T put the "special" diaper wrap on her sisters. Obviously she is still attached to that one. Maybe that one needs to go in her memory box. Make a ceremony of it so that she knows it is hers and hers only.

C.B.

answers from Kansas City on

you have your hands full!! four under the age of 5!? yikes! no wonder you're struggling with this. it's up to you whether to fight this battle or not, but if she wants to use the big girl potty, i would make the rule that she has to wear big girl panties. i take it she doesn't wet/dirty them, just wants to wear them instead of underwear? silly girl! hope she gets past this phase. make sure and praise and encourage, and let her know how special it is that SHE is the big girl and the big sister, and she has to show her sisters how to be a big girl and potty like a big girl. other than that i guess just wait it out and hope it passes soon!

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C.B.

answers from Austin on

I would give her the panties for her doll. Explain that she is a big girl but that she can keep them since they are special.

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K.T.

answers from Houston on

I know it's a little late, but I am the opposing voice to your previous answers. My son was the same way about his little brother. I finally just said fine, we'll put the diaper on you (in the evening). He wore it for all of 2 seconds. He laughed and giggled and then was done. I wonder if he was jealous and just wanted to be included. I think they sometimes want to feel a part of something they have fond memories of. I say that you have to do whatever works for you and your children. There are so many different parenting styles - I am probably more of a pushover than I should be, but I try to remember that they will be grown and gone before I know it (I can't imagine she'll want to wear that diaper to high school :)

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S.B.

answers from Kansas City on

I would take her and buy her pretty panties, (if possible, by herself) say with princesses or whatever on them. Then emphasize that she's a big girl and gets to wear pretty big girl panties that the other girls dont get to wear because they're not big girls like her. My dd loves her princess panties from walmart. she doesnt have younger siblings (yet) but she goes to daycare and she knows she's a big girl with panties and the others are babies with diapers.

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J.K.

answers from Austin on

The pink snap on Panty is special to her. I would take her and them aside and find out why/how special they are to her. If they are real special to her consider "putting them up" so she will always have them. (My 6yo daughter actually has a few things that are special enough to her that she wants to save "to have forever" but knows she can't use). Explain to her that the others (and that one if it is not special) are for little girls who cant use the potty yet. Since she is grown "we should let your sisters use them now so they can grow up too". Conversations like these is how I got my oldest daughter to stop throwing fits when my younger daughter started using hand me downs. It really worked (we started at 3).

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S.H.

answers from Chicago on

I would get rid of the favorite one.and if that babysitter is still around ask her to maybe get her some "beautiful Big Girl Panties". I say this becasue maybe the babysitter made fond memories and that is you girll's way of holding on to her. I know they are probably great as a hand me down to the other girls, but they were hers originally, that is why I say get rid of them. She needs to understand she is older than the other girls and she doesn't need those little girl panties. Then each time she puts on the correct panties, give her much praise and adoration. When she throws a fit and wants to put on the wrong panties ask her if she would like to go shopping and pick out her own to wear as long as she understands she doesn't need the other ones.

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J.S.

answers from San Antonio on

I would not let her wear diapers anymore because lets face it, too expensive to waste! But I don't see anything wrong with letting her wear the plastic pants at home though. Also, the ones she really is attached too let her have those to either wear or just to keep. Kids should be taught to share but they shouldn't have to share everything! When my kids friends come over there are a few things we put away that they would rather not share. As adults we don't share everything so why should our children have too? If she doesn't want to share the "special pink one" don't make her. I'm sure that phase will be short lived.

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