Approximately a year and a had ago I placed my 4 year old son with his aunt on his father's side because I was experiencing a hardship I was homeless and because I did not want my son to suffer I thought I was doing the right thing by placing him in a safe loving place but now she refuses to give him back ive seen him once because she does not want any contact with me I signed a temporary doctors note but nothing more however I think she has taken further legal action I'm confused what can I do can I go pick my son up I have a beautiful safe warm apartment now and a part-time job but I'm missing a part of me that I refuse to give up what can I do please help
You may have left out a lot of important *stuff* BUT if you didn't sign any legal paperwork then go to the police station and ask for an escort.
If there is other stuff that you left out of this post, then go to legal aid.
You do not mention if you were divorced but what I am thinking is that if you have custodial rights or if you are the legal guardian you have the right to get him back. If you had not visited him in that time he was with the aunt, you may have a issue if DCF thinks you abandoned him. Good Luck and I hope it works out.
Go to legal aid and ask them for advice. You may even need to go to court.
You need to talk with a lawyer and may need to go to court to get him back.
i'm glad you had somewhere to send him when you were in a bad place. good for you for doing what was best for him.
i doubt the woman who was there for you is now just cold and calculating and trying to steal your son. there's too much missing here.
she may well have taken legal action (i would have if i were caring for a small child for that long. she needed to have the law on her side in order to do her job as a guardian effectively.)
you too have legal rights and if you're in a good place can get your son back. but i hope you remember for his sake that your aunt has been his world through an important developmental stage of his life, and don't just yank him back and cut her out through vengefulness.
khairete
S. (going on the assumption this is a real post)
Do you have other issues that you have not mentioned? You said you signed a temporary doctor's note...I'm not sure what that means. Are there other factors? (i.e. drug use, mental health issues, etc)
Do you have other family that can help support you? It sounds like there is too much information missing to give a complete answer.
I don't have any advice because I don't know your legal rights. Ladies on here might be able to steer you in the right direction.
I just want to let you know that I read this and it breaks my heart. I can't even imagine the stress you have been under and the longing you have for your son. Sigh....I think I am gonna cry. I am so sorry honey.
Keep working and keeping up your apartment so you have a place to bring him to if things work out.
Sending you hugs :)
Depending on the laws where you live, you can ask for an officer escort to go and get your son. This is just a form of back-up to keep violence out of the picture. Make sure you have your son's birth certificate and go get him. Do not wait any longer, the longer you wait, the stronger case she will have IF she takes you to court for custody. Get a consult with a family law attorney, cover all your bases. And yes, the courts look favorably on a mom who would rather be apart from her child for a little bit, then to have them suffer.
ALL guardianship is temporary. Even if YOU went to court and gave her guardianship it is still temporary.
I suggest you visit with an attorney that specializes in family law. You might call child welfare too. They can give you some idea as to what you might need to do that would prohibit you getting your child. For instance, if they came to your home would they find that your child would have a separate sleeping space, clothing, enough food, toys, etc....you should not expect your child to come home with anything that they have purchased them.
Even if you have not seen your child, they do not have the legal right to your child. He is your child. You might even be able to call the police, tell then what is going on, have them meet you at their house, have them help you get your child from your aunt, and go home.
I believe you can just go get him and they can't do anything to you since there were no legal papers signed. BUT they may have filed papers without you finding out. All a judge makes a person do when they are filing for guardianship us put an add in the paper to say they're doing this. If they put it in a news paper that you didn't have access to there's no way you'd even know.
IF they've done that then they do have a legal right to your child until you go file paperwork to have that guardianship terminated.
You have the law on your side. Go follow through and get your child home with you.
How did you "place" your son with his Aunt?
Legally and via paperwork?
Or just a verbal "here's my son please take care of him, I am homeless" type verbal exchange and condoning it?
You need an Attorney.
And if they took your son, and adopted him etc. and claimed you abandoned him etc., then I would think that they'd need all of his legal papers/birth certificate/etc. to do this.
Did you give them, all of his birth papers and social security card/number, etc. so that they could have legally took, your son and claim him and then you as a Mom who abandoned him?????
You need an Attorney.
And who knows what that Aunt is telling your son about you.....
Or if you exist still or not.
Do you even see your son, regularly after all this time since he's been with his Aunt?
Or not?
You said you signed a "temporary Doctors note..." but nothing more.
What does that prove or not?
Per who has your son or not?
You need an Attorney.
And if that Aunt took legal action, how come you don't know about it, nor were you contacted to give consent etc., or was that not, needed?
You need to do whatever you can, if you want your son back.
And can you take care of him now and support your child?
You have to have a lawyer, R.. Please try the ladies' suggestions. I hope your circumstances are a lot better now. You've gone through a bad time. Keep your chin up.
Hopefully you can prove that you tried to maintain contact, but the aunt refused. This will go far in your favor if you must go to court.
See a lawyer and make sure that you have all of your ducks in order. If there's any reason why the court would have questions about your ability to parent, resolve it now before you appear before a judge. Sometimes caregivers just need to see that they are sending a child back into a stable situation.
I pulled the information below from a website about services listed in the area your profile says you are from. Almost every area has the same services so if you live somewhere else currently google it. This is info for legal aid. You should be able to see someone to get help recovering your son or get free advice on what you need to do. That's where I would start. Even if they have taken legal action, you have to have been served and taken to court and they have to very strongly prove that your intention was to abandon your child. They would have had to get social services involved. She can't just decide to keep your baby with no legal authority to do so.
California Rural Legal Assistance Phone Number: ###-###-#### Address: 511 D Street Marysville, CA 95901
CRLA is a private non-profit law firm. It was founded in 1966 to provide free legal assistance throughout rural California. They have 23 offices, from El Centro and Oceanside to Maryville. Each office offers full representation in major litigation, consultations, and advice at no charge to persons whose income is below certain limits.
Family Law Facilitator Phone Number: ###-###-#### Address: 120 Fifth Street Marysville, CA 95901
The Family Law Facilitator is a free service to all unrepresented Yuba County residents.
Family Law facilitator- County of Sutter Phone Number: ###-###-#### Address: 430 Center St. Y.C. 95991
Hope this helps,
L.
There's one pesky little detail that auntie is forgetting-You're his Mother! Any decent woman would have taken you in, as well. And where the hell is the father? You now have stability in your life ? Go get some legal help-if you can't afford an attorney-go to legal aid-a simple google search of your area will reveal dozens of resources-good luck!
Child support from his dad may help make ends meet.
I would first go to the local courthouse and see if she filed anything to gain legal guardianship or custody of your child.
If she did not, then you can call the polce and have them go with you to get your son. If she has not gotten legal guardianship/custody of him, then the police will make her give you the child - she has no legal right to him. Be sure you have his birth certificate and state-issued ID so the cops know you are the mom.
If she has gotten guardianship or custody of your son, She would have had to have filed some sort of document saying she has tried to find you, what she did to find you, and that you could not be found. Or someone could have fudged a proof of service and duped the court into believing you had been served with guardianship/custody papers when you weren't. Take that information and get an attorney ASAP.
Of course you miss your son and want him back. Now you need to really think about what is best for your son? Can you take care of him? Are you ready to put him first? Will you commit to caring for him and make the transition to your care as easy for him as you can?
If so, you need legal advice. His aunt has most likely gained legal custody in this time and is also thinking she has the best home for him. Your only chance is with an attorney, going to court to gain parenting time and gradually get back in his life. You will have to prove to the courts that you can and will be a good parent to regain custody. Go to legal aid asap to get help. The longer he is in others care, the more difficult it will be.
What are the custodial arrangements? Who has legal custody? If you still have legal custody and this is an informal agreement, then there should be no problem. If you have given her legal custody, then you will likely need to go through family court to regain custody of your son. If you can offer him a stable environment, a judge is likely to return him to his biological mother or at least give you partial custody or visitation. What you need is to consult with an attorney, even a freebie legal aid one.
I don't believe that she could file for and be granted custody without your knowledge unless reasonable attempts to find you were unsuccessful or it appeared that you abandoned your son. You said you've only seen him once in a year and a half. That may be considered abandonment unless you made some attempts to keep in contact.
Get yourself down to Legal Aid IMMEDIATELY!!!
Why do you only have a part time job? You will not be able to adequately parent without financial stability, so I would try to get full time employment.... Unless you are also a student attending college now???
We can't give you advice, there is too much information missing. However, if you take your son by force after you placed him (we do not know the details of placement) with his aunt, you can be accused of kidnapping. Typically 12 months with NO contact is considered abandonment and is grounds for termination of parental rights. While you were getting yourself back together, did you have visits with your son? Or provide any "support", like birthday gifts, Christmas visits etc.
You need to get the papers you signed and talk to a lawyer.
Call your local Department of HUman Services and speak with someone in the childrens protective services department, tell them exactly what happened, and your current living situation is stable, and your plan to assure it remains stable... They will help you figure this out...good luck on getting your HEART back!
