Help - My 2-Year-old Boy Is Hitting

Some of this has been said by previous posters, but just to articulate a little more - your son is hitting as a way of communicating that he is upset/frustrated/angry/etc. Even though he is very articulate for his age, that doesn't mean that he has learned that when you are angry, etc. you need to handle it with words, not with hitting. He is advanced verbally, but not emotionally. Plus, it is very developmentally appropriate for 2 year olds not to want to share. So, if you put him in a time out, what you are doing is telling him that it is not right for him to feel angry/frustrated/etc. Instead, you want to give him the message that when you are angry, you talk about it. When he hits, you say something like, "We don't hit. I can see that you are frustrated because you want to play with your sister's toy. Let's find a toy for you." Yes, you will have to do this a million times, but he eventually will get it. Also, you might see that eventually his sister might even offer the toy to him because he asked nicely. Just remember, you are teaching him the right way to deal with things. He needs to learn this just like anything else.

Not every two year old hits.
Some bite, some pinch and some scratch. LOL.

Like the poster below said, your two year old has a limited vocabulary for expressing himself. This probably will be true for several years, though the hitting will probably be replaced by threats or something else.

Several ideas: first, be proactive and when (if) you see your son in a situation where he will hit, or if you see his frustration building - get in there immediately and restrain/remove him.

He's frustrated, so give him another way to communicate that. Use words. Show him that these are more effective.

Last, two good books are "Siblings without Rivalry" and "Mom! Jason's breathing on me!" both are well known and at your library. They are easy and funny to read as well as giving you lots of great new ideas on how to deal with your kids.

Poor thing, he is not a monster he just acts like one.. Hee, hee..

How verbal is he? Most children hit as a reaction or out of frustration because they cannot say what they are feeling or want or need. Our daughter would not use full sentences but she learned to use one or 2 words to express her feeling and needs at this age. "Frustrated", "scared", "hungry", "mad", "angry", "soft and gentle". "Please", "thank you", "excuse me"...

It will be your job to try to help him figure out what the words are to all of this and teach him what these feelings are. You will feel like you are having a one person conversation and narrating his life and movements, but he soon will understand the feeling and the words..

If he does not want to share, give him the words. "Do you want to play with that toy one more minute?" "Can you trade toys?" "I like when you share."
(Just pick one).. .

"You seem frustrated, because sister has a ice cream, would you like a bite? "Use your words." "tell sister thank you for sharing."." "We are soft and gentle with sister." "We use soft touches with friends."

"You seem frustrated, do you need a hug?"
" I can tell your feelings are hurt because the dog ran away."
"We use soft voices around dogs."

When you see a feeling or reaction about to come up, let him know you understand and give him that word.

The time outs will work if you do them every time.. It seems like it is not working right now, but a at some point it will click with him..

First of all; disclaimer for all the people who are going to pop up and say hitting teaches hitting. None of my kids hit, and their non-spanked friends do-some of them even hit their parents!!! My brother and I knew it was not OK to hit, and the consequence would have been a spanking. Which we knew. So we didn't do it.
My 2 1/2 year old has been terrorized daily in the gym daycare by a "time out" kid who keeps hitting him, and I have finally taught my large son it's OK to "hit back".

So anyway, whether you're philosophically in agreement with it or not, this will work: Give him one calm warning not to hit. If he hits, give him one very firm sting on the butt and the calm direction: "no hitting". Don't get riled, don't raise your voice, don't give several warnings, do it every single time. It's merely a "you decide to do this, here is what always happens" transaction. He'll stop.
My kids know it's absolutely wrong to hit, and point it out when they see other kids do it. And no, they don't draw a psychological eye for an eye fairness and equality perspective out of it at that age. They just know their own actions and consequences. And no, my 4 1/2 year old isn't mad at me that I swatted her once at age 18 months for hitting. She doesn't remember, she's just always known ever since that it's not OK to hit.
Your son's articulate nature will get this message through even faster. He'll quit in no time.

Well by all means talk to him about it, however you sound like you are in the right direction giving him consequences for his behavior. Remove him immediately from a situation when he is hitting and keep him away from the others for awhile. Take things away that he loves and give it back when you determine. Do not tell him things like he won't get to go to Alaska or Disneyworld, (unless you have houses there and you really mean it). b E CLEAR, IF YOU DO SUCH AND SUCH this will happen.
Boys are more aggressive at girls, but since you said he is very articulate you can use words to and tell him to use his words not his fists.

It can be very difficult to deal with hitting because it is very frustrating for the parent...you just have to express that it is not nice and that he is going to have to figure out another way to express his frustration...I am going to attach a link to a site that has a lot of different suggestions and ideas for dealing with this - it's from the skinny scoop site which I go to for a lot of my parenting questions...good luck & check it out:

http://www.theskinnyscoop.com/search/hit?utm_campaign=the...