First Name Basis

I think how children address adults is regional. In the south it would be little more formal then say the west, where it's a little less formal. I always instruct my kids to call adults by the name they were introduced to the person with. If the person would prefer something else then the person can correct them with what they would prefer to be called.

I'm almost always addressed as so and so's mom (depends on which kid they are friends with). Sometimes it's just mom, and others use some variation of my first name. As long as it isn't insulting, I don't really care.

Unless we are close friends that consider each other family, my children called men Mr._________ and women Mrs.__________. More familiar ladies were called Miss Susan or Miss Jane, etc.

It's a Southern thing. The same woman did my grandmother's hair every single week for 45 years. She was always and only ever referred to as Miss Eva.

Such formalities seem unfamiliar in California, but I raised my kids the same way I was raised.

Children under 18 call me Miss A. and they know better not to. I also have my son address any grown up properly, usually a title and the first name. And I also ask children on my property to call other grown ups by title and name, not just me. I've never had any complaints from other parents.

If my house is the only place they'll use manners then maybe I'm doing those kids and especially my son, a favor. So when it comes time for them to deal with someone when it matters, like a boss, landlord, loan officer, college professor, politeness won't be so foreign to them.

Mr. And Mrs. Always!!!!!!!

In my part of the south, the kids always call the adults Mr./Miss/Mrs. then the adult's first name. Example - Miss Jessica....

Anything else would be weird and kinda disrespectful to me personally, but that's just how we do it here. I also wouldn't want to be called by my last name from a child. That's even weirder. Now once this "child" turns 18 or older, I wouldn't expect it, but I get it all the time from my former dance students who are grown and have kids of their own. When I tell them to call me just by my first name, they say they can't do it. It's kinda funny. :)

If the kid's parents don't mind, and as long as you're not offended, go with it!

I think that this is highly regional. Here in the PNW EVERYONE is on a first name basis. Since I have been in Seattle I have never heard anyone adress anyone with Mr. or Mrs. Lastname. Coming from a more formal culture it was definitely weird for me but here even my bosses, teachers, college professors....all go by their first name only.
So yeah, I am I. for all of DD's friends.
Good luck.

I am more like Ally: My daughter knows that people over about 18 (in other words, college age and up) get a title; it's "Mr. Todd" even for our friends' college-age son. She addresses college kids and slightly older adults (parent age) as "Miss" or whatever followed by first name but only if she's known them a long time and well: Our church friends are "Miss Sherry" and "Mrs. Joan" etc. But anyone else? Friends' parents? "Mrs. Smith" or "Mr. Jones" etc. If I heard her calling a friend's parent by a first name she would get corrected fast, even if the parent had said for her to do that -- I would be OK with it but would still insist that she put Mr. or whatever in front of the first name. She calls one of her private music teachers "Miss Judy" but the other "Miss Butler" and that's by their preferences but I'd never let her drop the titles.

I was raised in a place where it was a HUGE deal for a child to be asked call an adult by a first name and I well remember the very special feeling I had with one couple -- my mom's oldest friends and the only adults anywhere I was allowed to call by first names with no titles. I loved it and it marked them as very close to us. Everyone else was Mr. or Mrs. or Miss, usually with a last name until I had known them a very long time. I accepted it as a rite of passage to be able to call adults by first names and I think it's sad that we've lost that rite of passage. I was taught that using first names was done among peers -- and that adults are not kids' peers. That's why it was a big deal to grow into first names with adults: It meant you were growing up.

I've noticed that none of my daughter's friends ever calls me by my first name. I think none of them knows it! Other parents around here seem to do the same thing -- last name with title unless you know the family well.

In our area, for family friends and acquaintances, it's first name with Miss, Mrs, or Mr attached to it. I imagine it's a southern thing. :)

I really, really don't like being called by my first name by a child. But I have a lot of friends who allow and encourage it. It really is more about how they prefer to raise their child over how it makes me feel, so I don't correct - I follow the parents' lead. I insist that my kids call adults by their last name because that's how I was raised. It just seems too familiar otherwise. We do have one friend who is the sunday school director and has the kids call her Miss (even though she's married) Cathy, so occasionally I'll refer to her as Miss Cathy outside of the church context as well, but often, even with that, she's Miss Cathy in church, and Mrs. Smith as the mom of their friends.
Even the teenage babysitter is Miss Taylor (first name) to them.

We teach our kids to say Mr or Mrs even if it's followed by the person's first name. My husband and I can't stand hearing a 9 year old call us by our first names. I still want to call my friend's parents by Mr or Mrs... It seems fairly cute when a 4 year old calls me by my first name but as they get older, until they're an adult, just seems wrong and to be one more way of not teaching kids to respect their elders. And it's surprisingly unweird to hear myself called "Mrs X" by some kids who parents also follow this rule. It doesn't make me feel old or really formal or like the kids don't know me well. On the contrary, we're very close to our next door neighbors who also follow our tradition so their kids are amongst the few that do use Mr and Mrs X. Doesn't make me feel any less close to them and I appreciate their manners.

Yes, always. Using titles would be confusing, Mrs./Ms., and several last names don't match their children's last names. I'm "S." to everyone (except my birth daughter), so everyone else is called by their first name, too.

My son is nearly six, and we are more of a 'when in Rome' family. I have a load of friends who would be annoyed if Kiddo called them "Mr/Miss" before their name. They're like family and he's on a first name basis with them. His best friend's parents are the same way.

That said, at school, we always use the title and last name and I model this even at home. Those persons are always referred to as "Mr So-and-So"-- I, as well, use their title and last name when speaking directly to the teacher or about the teacher. I never refer to a teacher by their first name in front of the kids.

We have a few honorary "Aunties" and an "Uncle", (friends of mine from long before, godparents, etc.) who he addresses with those titles.

And then, I am just sensitive to how a parent addresses me to their child. If they use "Miss H." or something similar, that shows me *their* expectation and I work with my child on ensuring they are using the correct title for that person. Up here in Portland, it seems like many adults do not care, but some do. I'm mostly often addressed, however, as "Hey, J's mom...." to which I usually reply "You can call me H.". To me, the title isn't the only way to convey respect to an adult: tone of voice and following the directions (for playdates, like "please go wash your hands for snack") can convey much respect as well.

And with older people, we default to a title and last name unless that person introduces themselves to my child by their first name. I've found that this seems to be the norm here.

Depends on the person. Some people prefer it. I go by the particular person's preference. Anyone we don't know is Mr., Mrs., or Miss...until we know what they'd like.

We are all on a first name basis here. The only people still called by a title are teachers.

Yeah, kids call me "L.". Doesn't bother me a bit.
My kids call my friends by their first names and people that we know but are not friends (like neighbors or my parent's friends) Mr. or Mrs.

I have to laugh. My best friend in high school was a guy. Every time we would go to his house I would say, "Hi Mrs. Hutchison, Mr. Hutchison." and his mom would laugh and say, "oh call me Nancy." I never could. It just didn't seem right! I wasn't trying to be disrespectful, but I just couldn't call her Nancy. Even when my buddy got married and I saw his parents I said Mr. and Mrs. I think now it's a joke.

We are all on a first name basis here. It's not disrespectful as long as the adult is comfortable with that. They call the teachers by their first name with Miss or Mr. attached at our Montessori school, but the public schools insist on last names, even among the adults. Everyone is different though, so I always ask new people how they want my kids to address them.

My friend adopted a good philosophy, she teaches her kids to always say "Mr. or Mrs./Miss" unless that person says "oh just call me so and so." in which it is ok to use a first name. She has some friends with a long tough last name and her kids call them Mr. A and Mrs. A which is cute. Her kids call me by my first name which is more comfortable to me.

I remember being confused as a kid about what to call someones parents, so I just tried not to ever address them directly!

Our son uses the Mr./Miss/Mrs. then the adult's first name.
I guess it's more of a Southern thing but it's not exclusive to the south.

Friends/family/neighbors/co-workers can use my first name.
My husband and mother can use nicknames.
When my son was in pre-school his classmates sometimes did not know each others last names.
So they called me Mrs <my son's first name> (which I thought was kind of cute) or <my son's first name>'s Mom.

Everyone else can call me Mrs <my last name>.
We call teachers/principals Mr or Mrs/Miss last name always.
Our son's taekwondo instructors are always Master <last name>.

During the last year or so I've had a few waitresses call me by my first name and it irritates the heck out of me.
It's too familiar and I don't like strangers assuming that using my first name is ok.

Our kids call close adults by their first name, but they always use a "greeting" or something to show respect. For instance, the neighbors are Mr. E*** and Mrs. V***. We have close family friends that are Uncle M***, Uncle D***, Auntie M**** and so on.

Mine is 2, but each adult gets a nickname or a handle on the first name.

I don't have a problem with kids calling their friends' parents by their first name. My son is in kindergarten and most of his friends call me K. or Miss K.. He calls them by their first names as well (and doesn't usually even say Miss).

Depends on how and how long we've known each other. They call my friends (who are like family) by their first names. They generally call their friends' parents who are not my good friends by Mr./Mrs. Last Name. Sometimes after a friend's parents become good friends with my husband and me, it transitions to first name.

BTW...the Mr/Ms/Miss First Name is a regional thing. That would not be considered good manners here, it would be considered weird and rude. That's how we address day-care workers and pre-school teachers. Outside of that very strict context, it's Mr./Ms./Mrs. Last Name.

All of my kid's friends call me Ms. Rachel. That's me...no need to call me by my last night. A few of my kids friends (who have parents we are close with) call my husband by his nickname instead of Mr. Jeff.

My husband is older than me and still introduces our kids to people by their last name, but I don't. I don't think it's disrespectful or weird to call parents by their first name as long as you have the Ms. or Mr. in front of it.

My kids are only 1 and 3, but I am going to enforce the rule that all adults are called at least "Mr/Mrs/Miss" <first name> until they are 18. As they get into school, I believe teachers are called Mr/Mrs/Miss <last name>. As for other adults, it's based on the adult's preference...but with at least a "title" in front!

Hello, sorry for late response, but wanted to send mine. I love hearing kids Ms. Teri or Mrs. Smith, it sounds so respectful. We taught our son this at a very early age and I'm so proud when I hear him call my friends with the Ms./Mr./Mrs. And people notice it, too. Let's see what others have said....

I have always taught my children to show respect to adults by putting a Ms. or Mr. in front of the person's first name. It's a show of respect.

Our boys have been taught to call an adult Mr./Mrs. last name until they are asked/told by that adult to call them something else. Our really close friends are referred to as aunt T/Uncle J. Some friends' parents are Ms. First name and others have requested just the first name.
Our boys also say yes/no sir and ma'am to adults they don't know.
My kids' friends call me Ms. First name.

My daughter called most adults Mr/Ms FirstName. That was the default. If they preferred something else, she called them what they wanted to be called.
She called my sister and BIL by their first names - never Aunt and Uncle.
My niece and nephew call me by a diminutive form of my first name - not Aunt.
I didn't care what my freiends' kids called me.
If my daughter's friends were at my house, they often all just called me Mom.

There's a blog today on this site about the same question.

My children called all adults by their titles and last names until they were adults themselves - or until the adult asked them to address them a different way. We have older neighbors (older than I am, which is pretty old) whom I still address as Mr. or Mrs., because they've never said, "Oh, why don't you call me George/Violet?" There's nothing stuffy or over-formal about using titles when addressing people.

It's not just a Southern thing. I was raised in the North and my children were raised in the West.

It does make life interesting. I prefer being called Mrs. ___ (not Ms. - Mrs.). But the children in my neighborhood haven't learned that way of speaking, and aren't going to do it unless I ask them to. So I teach them: "Jason, I like to be called Mrs. ____ or Miss M.." My last name is a challenging one, so I give options. Some of the kids think I'm weird. So do some of their parents. But it's possible to teach a lot if you smile while you're talking.

And I've never met a parent who was truly offended by my correcting his/her child - maybe a little surprised. Sometimes the parent apologizes to me - even though I don't believe the child was intending to be disrespectful.

On the other hand, if Susie's mama tells her daughter, "That's plain stupid - you just keep on calling her M. no matter what she says," then Susie's mama is treating me with disrespect. Of course, Susie's mama probably grew up hearing the old line, "Oh, good heavens, DON'T call me "Mrs."... I'll think you're talking to my mother!" How many of you remember that one?

Being on a first-name basis used to be the sign of a friendship. No more. Total strangers who want to sell me something call me up and say, "Hi, M., how ya doin' today?" The cashier at the bank and the waiter at the restaurant do the same thing. Friendship? No! And yet they're not being deliberately disrespectful; they're talking to their customers the way they've been trained to do by the company. So I correct them or let it go, at my own discretion. I'd really like to teach their employers a thing or two!

What anyone may think of me for wanting to be addressed as Mrs. ___ is, well, none of my business.

My grand kids call all the adults in their life that are NOT teachers of some sort by their first name. I think it's quaint for them to use Miss XXX or Mr. CCC but it others look at them like their from another planet if they do it out in public.

I have one friend who insists on her kids calling me Miss XXX, I have my grand kids call her Aunt VVV. I just don't want them standing out and looking weird.

Almost never and I do think it is regional. She attends a school where teachers are called by their first name as they believe learning is collaborative rather than "expert" and "learner."

When traveling though, I encourage my daughter to use Mr/Mrs, Señor/Senora, etc as I wouldn't want to offend.

Most of my kids' friends call me Mrs. S. That's just sort of the norm around here (and also I used to work at the school so that's how they know me!) I like it, personally. I grew up in a pretty low brow environment so I really appreciate old fashioned manners :-)
My kids have been taught to call adults Mr. or Mrs. (unless they are told otherwise) so that's what they do. Some adults prefer to be called by their first name and I think that's okay too. Different strokes!

Mine call most my Mr or Ms their first name. With an exception of my best friend that they just call by her first name.

I know you have gotten a lot of answers but I wanted to chime in also. I am from New Orleans, a southern girl transplanted to Missouri, and in the south there are just some things you don't do. :-) I grew up and raised my children to call a person Mrs., Ms., Miss, or Mr. John. We didn't use last names because sometimes it was hard to pronounce. But you had to say Mrs. or Mr. Now when an adult told my children they could just call them John, then it was okay ONLY when speaking to them directly. But when speaking about them you were to use the sir name. When we moved up north kids were just calling us by our first name only. We were appalled. Could not figure out why their parents would let them just call us John or Jane, especially since we earned the right to be called Mr. and Mrs. So we started correcting them. Our children are now teens and we still make them address an adult by the sir name first. Unless corrected by the adult they are speaking to. My good friend has her children address all adults by their last name. This way they learn the adults first and last name.
To me it is polite. My girls also say "Yes mam" and "No mam".

My daughter is 15 and her bf has always called me Ms. Keisha, since she was 5 and it never bothered me. To all their other friends I'm still so and so mom lol, so its hi Taryn's mom!

I never knew what to call my friends parents growing up so I just said hi.

My daughter calls our friends by their first name but with Ms. or Mr. in front of it. There is one friend that she just calls her by her first name but we have known her for years and she was my daugher's babysitter when she was really young. But that friend's boyfriend and roommate are Mr. and Ms. first name to my daughter. I think that it reminds my daughter that she has to have respect for the adults in her life.

My husband and I both prefer to be called A. and Mike, but I teach high school, and all the kids know it even though most of them don't go to the school where I teach, so usually we're Mike and Mrs. G____ . :/