Do I Tell "His" Mom?

Yes, you should tell the mother. I know if my son was displaying that behavior I would definitely want to know. Just let her know what he was saying. If she is a concerned parent she will talk to him and help the behavior change.

Absolutely tell his mom! She might not have any idea that her son has picked up some bad words, and she might be grateful for the chance to talk to her son and let him know that using those kinds of words are not acceptable. Wouldn't you want someone to let you know if your kids were doing that? No need to be offensive, just start out with, "So-and-so is a great kid, and he had a lot of fun with my son, but he kept using these words . . . I'm not sure how you feel about those words, but we don't like them. Could you talk with him and ask him not to use those words around us?" That should work. If she takes offense, at least that's good information that perhaps this family might better left alone, and you could try to steer your son away from this particular friend. Good luck!

I would tell her. When I've ran into this situation I've just told the mom that "I would want to know if it was my son, so I'm wanted to let you know that your child was using bad langage at my house." I figure if they get offended my child doesn't need to play with that child anymore. Hope that helps

Yes, I echo what the other two posters have said - you do need to tell his mom. I would just say, hey the boys had a great time together, but I thought you would want to know that little Johnny was using some bad language during the weekend.

Like the other posters said,I would want to know if that was my child so I could address it. Good luck.

I would definatly share it with the Mom. Don't be alarmed if she gets defensive when you tell her. Just be nice about it and let her know that you didn't want to hurt your son's feelings but felt it necessary to let her know.

I look at it as if it was my child would I want to know? (for me yes)

Just remember to be positive and nice so she doesn't feel like you are attacking her parenting. Things like this can be touchy for some.

Blessings,
C.
www.AHomeCareer.com

I have also had similiar experiences. The thing I have done is to first tell my children that they are responsible for the actions of their friends. If they know something will happen that is against the standards of your home they should not invite this friend over to start with. At times I have talked to the parents and told them I did not want to offend them, but their child was doing something in my home that was disturbing and offensive to my children. Many times the parents have thanked me because they were not aware of this behavior.By doing this, the discipline is back on their shoulders. I have also told the friend that if I had to send them home it was because my child was not behaving the way I wanted and please not to be offended. I think it is best to catch the behavior and talk about it in the open when it first starts happening. This way everyone has a chance to respond. If the child know that word got back to his parent about this behavior he might be more respectful next time he is invited over.

If it were my child, I would want to know. Not to punish them, but to find out where they learned it and to explain that that type of language is not acceptable for a child to use. And to have them apologize to you (and/or the person who they used that language around).

I would bring it up in a non-threatening manner such as, "The boys had a great time. However, Johnny used some inappropriate words a few times and I just thought you'd want to know." And if you have him over again and it continues, I would tell his mom that while you enjoy having him over, he continues to use bad language that you prefer your sons didn't hear and so when he's ready to use nice words, you'll be happy to have him over again.

Like I said, if it were my child, I'd want to know.

I would want to know if it were my son - but I think I would want to hear it from him. I would like him to take the accountability of informing me of his actions. Maybe the next time he comes over, have a discussion with him as to your rules and if he starts it up again, end the weekend early with the child calling to explain to his parent(s) why he needed to be picked up. That way there is no question as to whether or not you are telling the truth or being over reactionary. Good luck!

If the boy would not respond to your request, then it needs to be brought before the parents. It is a different story if the boy respected your wishes and stopped but he only toned it down???

We had a boy come stay with us for the night that did the same thing. I told him we did not use language like that at our house and if he didn't stop I would call his dad to come pick him up. He apologized and stopped.

If we expect our children to do the right thing despite feelings or situations, we too must do the right thing. I know it is hard to end a stay over that was ment to be lots of fun for our child but we must not bend our morals or values.

Hey R.! So, I actually did childcare just one day a week for the sweetest little 3 year old and his baby sister all during the school year, and then summer came and I had the other 2 kids, 8 & 10. ALL DAY they screamed cuss words at eachother.... at the baby, at my son, and even at me. The oldest one cussed specifically at me- like when I would tell him to do something he old me to "su*@ his fu*&^&*# di*&". I think I almost had a heart attack, and then my son , who is 2, repeated it and I was like no way..... so I did tell his mom. I was very nice about it, I told her they were very fun but they use terrible language and my son is starting to pick it up and I was very sorry but I could not continue to care for them. Your case is a bit different, but I definitely do recommend telling her, very nicely, because I don't think any parent wants their kids speaking like that. In my case, the mom was shocked. She said they never speak to her or even in front of her that way (??) and that she was very sorry and completely understood. And, wouldn't you wnat to know if your son was behaving that way in other people's homes? I would!!

I would tell, Its gone both ways in our life, I've informed parents and they' in return have informed me, its kind of like the saying "it takes a village to raise a child" I'm always grateful to be able to learn about fowl behavior my son is having so I can have a choice to help him correct it before he is too out of control, as long as the parent doesn’t come off like "my child is perfect and your's is ...." and has more the attitude like "we care about all our kids" than I've never been offended.
GL, I know its an awkward situation.