My twin girls will be 2 at the end of this month. They have figured out that they can climb on the coffee table, hit people, and scream non-stop. They are even taking to hitting themselves in the head and slapping their 9 month old sister. I have tried the spanking and time out scenario. I am about at my wits end. We have a pediatrician visit the first part of March, and I am planning on talking to him about our little situation. I really need some help.
LIke I have always said keep them busy :) Trust me I know how hard it is with 3 kids but even if its you have to dump beads on the floor and ask them to help you pick them up at least they are busy and not terrorizing the house :)
I know it sounds weird but if your little ones are busy they dont have time to climb on the table and hit each other :)
Well first off you cant hit them and tell them not to hit, just be stern with them and tell them that hitting is bad and it hurts people. Do the time tell them why they are being put in time out put them there for about 2 minutes then ask them if they know what they were in timeout about, when they tell you then they need to apologize to the person(s) for what they did.
Not sure how much help that will be, I have a 1yr old and he is hitting me, and only me, I grab his hand and say NO dont hit that hurts mommy. He is getting better about it, eventually he will stop. One can only hope.
G.
I think no matter what discipline you use it is useless unless it is consistant. Spanking, timeout, taking away toys are all great and as successful as you make them. All kids are different and you really have to be the mom. I know that's not much of an answer, just that consistancy is key!!
You have your handsful w/ 2yr old twins and a nine month old...holy cow!!! God Bless ya and good luck!!!
T.:
You have to give them the message that those choices (bad choices) are unacceptable. Spanking them only reinforces that hitting is okay. Try 1-consistent time out (get an egg timer and time them for two minutes, if they get up, it starts over), 2-start a sticker chart to reinforce the good behavior (if they don't hit, they get a sticker), 3-If they are not being safe by hitting self/others, put them in their crib for some "safe time" (not sure if they are still in a crib?)...Give these a try, and see what happens. The main thing is to be consistent, and make sure their father is as well.
A. L
Here's what a therapist gave me to repeat everytime you see them being physically aggressive. Before you punish them say:
It's okay to be upset but
it's not okay to hurt someone
it's not okay to hurt things
it's not okay to hurt yourselves
with that being said avoid spanking right now. They want the negative attention as much as they want the positive attention and you're giving it to them.
Here's a website to help you understand this concept:
http://lifematters.com/step.asp
I wouldn't necessarily go back to time out in the tradional sense. I would invest in a baby gate and designate a room where they will go away from everyone else when they have been violent.
All I can tell you for sure is that this too will pass! My twins are in kindergarten now and they are so much easier to handle. It really does get better. :) My best advice is to do what it takes to be as consistent as you can but more importantly do what it takes for you to stay sane! I had a play yard in the living room that they had to go to (alone) for a time out without toys if they were disobeying. The discipline at this point needs to be very accessible since they have a short memory and you have a lot going on. I also coordinated times for them to just play alone. One in the bedroom with a gate and one in the play yard with toys. They didn't like it very much but they grew accustom to our schedule. My twins were 2 1/2 when I had my baby girl and I know it is really rough when the baby needs attention and they can get away with way too much. Try to keep the perspective that they are having the time of their lives with their playmate and that they are just being two year olds. They aren't crazy (well not any more crazy than any two year old twins testing their limits anyway) and you aren't a bad mom :) Oh, and get a good pair of ear plugs to eliminate some of the noise you have to endure. {{hugs}}
Ignore the hitting themselves, thats a cry for attn my son (almost 3) went through also. The hitting other people all I know is this. "slap" them on the arm. Make it sting a LITTLE. Then ask "that hurt, didn't it?" and (hopefully) they say yes and you say "thats why we don't hit people. I had to do that with my son. And my mom gave me the advice because she had a problem with me biting. So finally she bit me and I didn't like it.
About the screaming I let my son scream outside and pop him on the mouth if he screams inside and ask where we scream. He has gotten good at telling me we scream outside.
Hope this helps?
