Work Full Time No Energy

The best and most useful advice I can give to you is to take care of yourself first so that you can be there for your child, a happy mom is a happy child. It is so important that you get your rest and begin taking good physical care of yourself. Working mom's have to leave the PERFECT wife, mother concept behind. In order of priority your home can be little messy most homes with young children are.....your home is to be lived in and played in now. Keep it simple, clean once a week and pick up at the end of the day before going to bed, get your hubby to help you! See if there is a mothers helper (even a young 13 yr old that likes playing with babies) they will like the little money ($3-5 hr) will be a great help, someone from your neighborhood for a few hours while you get things done, try and stay organized, sleep when baby sleeps. As soon as that baby goes down for the night, go to bed! Don't worry it will get better, but do not try to be everything to everyone all the time, it does not work that way. Let your husband know you need to sleep and rest and get him to team up with you as much as possible. Hubby's usually do not do things exactly like you would, but not accepting his help if offered is a mistake. Relax a little and enjoy your time with your child accept things are not perfect, kids do not need a playmate every minute. Kids need love, and acceptance, and nurturing, and for mom to be cheerful just do that. Learn to not be so set in your ways and accept change, that is the biggest lesson I have learned as a mother! Good luck.

I feel your pain. I have a 5 year old and twin 3 year olds and I work full time M-F. I leave my house at 5:50 a.m. and return at 6:30 p.m. When I get home, I have 90 minutes to hang out with my kids before they go to sleep. In the winter, it's hard b/c it's dark out and basically, all we do is watch TV or play with cars or do a small art project. In the summer when I get home, we sometimes run around outside because it's still light out. But I often feel guilty that I like to "watch" them play rather than actively play with them. Truthfully, though, they don't seem to mind.

I've given up on housework. Obviously, I straighten up after myself and put dishes in the dishwasher, the basic stuff. But in terms of cleaning up after the kids, I let my nanny do that. She also does the laundry and, because she drives, I let her do our food shopping and she even buys b-day party gifts for parties our kids get invited to. So that saves me a lot of work.

In terms of energy levels, it really does help if you have a chance to exercise. I try to go to the gym during lunch 2 or 3 times a week (I'd like to go more, but sometimes it's not possible). When it gets warmer out, a great thing to do is put your son in a stroller and take a nice, long walk when you get home from work. Even though you may not feel like walking, it ultimately will boost your energy.

Eating healthy and taking vitamins also helps. And truthfully, if I don't get a cup of Starbucks every day, I'm a mess!!! On the weekends, my husband runs out to get me starbucks because the few days I haven't had it, I'm so tired that I need to nap in the afternoon on the weekends!

Try to make sure you get at least 7 hours of sleep a night, especially on the weekends, when you're probably tempted to stay up later. It's hard b/c the kids are still getting up so early so you can't sleep late!!!

Good luck!

HI there! I totally understand where you are coming from on this. I work Mon-Thurs until 5 or 6pm depending on the day. I know its really hard when you are wiped out from work. ON top of that, my husband and I have been separated for 2 months so I'm on my own.

I learned to first take care of myself. I started taking vitamins, my doctor suggested prenatal vitamins. You can get them over the counter. I began to go to the gym 3x a week BEFORE work because I have the time. Tts been about a month now, dropped 10lbs and feel less stressed out and more energy. I wasn't taking care of myself, therefore I was no good for my kids(ages 5, 3, and almost 2) IF I CAN'T get to the gym, if you have satellite, most offer some exercise channel or on demand. The kids think its hilarious, but we are interacting while I'm working out. Also don't feel guilty, this will take more energy out of you and make you not want to do anything.

I've accepted that my place isn't going to be spic and span clean. I do one load of laundry a day and don't start another one unless I really have the energy for it.

Make a day for just the bathroom, vacuuming or mopping, etc. IF you do a little at a time, you won't feel as overwhelmed and it will get done. Accept HELP if you have it.

With the kids toys, I've gotten rid of a lot of toys and stuck with a few favorites, the mess is a bit smaller. This is a great time to teach your lil one how to clean up. Make it a game and have fun with it. I have my kids toys in plastic totes. It works great.

I hope this helps. I know its hard, just know that you are not alone.

God bless you!

Call your doctor and have them test you for thyroid problems. Ask them to do a FULL thyroid work up. I felt the same way after my second child and it got so bad I would fall asleep while nursing her. I was hypothyroid and meds (safe to nurse with) worked in giving me my life back and having energy to enjoy it. I too am Way overweight and that plays a role but should not knock you down for the count. Also the doctor may want to test you for anemia. A friend was anemic after delivery and againa simple, safe fix. Better safe than sorry and tired is part of motherhood but exhastion should not keep you from your life. Good luck!! A.

Hi C.,
I feel your pain! I have a 4 year old and an 8 month old. I am constantly exhausted too! When I get home from work, that is my 1/2 hour of "catchup time." I let my 4 year old play by himself or watch a cartoon. The baby is content to sit in her bouncy seat and watch me. I try to make lunches for the next day, start dinner, get everyone's clothes ready for the next day, feed the cats. Then I try to play with the kids either before or after dinner. Sometimes it doesn't work too well. And I try not to stress too much about the housework. I keep telling myself the kids are only young once and these years are going to fly by!!!! Good luck!

I think it is so important to get some help with the cleaning. Have someone do the heavy cleaning once a week. If that is not financially possible now, then every other week, which would leave light cleaning for you. Children do not need a lot of toys. If you find yourself constantly picking up toys, then put some away and rotate. My son acts like they are new toys that he has never seen before. Order diapers and anything else you can from Diapers.com. Order your groceries. Use whatever services you can to make your life easier, so you have more energy and time with your child. If you are feeling overweight, go out for a long walk with your child over the weekend. Good luck and take it easy on yourself.

Split up tasks, and figure out what matters most!

Don't do any cleaning when you first get home. Spend at least 30 minutes hanging out with your little guy. You don't have to "do" anything. Just sit on the floor with him, play some music, and chat while he plays. Then, split duties up with your husband. If you're eating together, work quickly to gather the food together. (And buy a crockpot, if you don't have one. Then the food's ready when you get home!) If you're feeding baby first, then only one of you does that. The other one gets everything he needs for bed together. Then switch- one parent does bath while the other does a small chore around the house (or gets dinner ready for later). Even take turns with the bedtime routine- your son will be fine if daddy does bedtime 3 nights a week!

No big chores during the week! A load of laundry, the dishes, and maybe a quick vacuum. That's it! Save the scrubbing for the weekend. It's really, REALLY ok to not have a perfect house! A floor can be mopped any time, but time with your son is temporary and crucial. :)

If you take turns, you'll have way more energy. And your son will get more quality time with each parent. But make a plan with your husband, so both of you are on the same page.

Once you get a good routine going, and catch up on sleep (very very important!), then you can see if there's time to work out. I haven't figured that part out yet...but maybe you'll let me know??? :)

Take care of you, and good luck!

I too work full time and have 1 son. The one thing I learned to do is let go of the idea that the house must be spotless. It was hard at first, but it was what I needed to do. That's not to say let it become such a pigpen that it's a hazzard for your son, just let some of the small things go. I usually do at least 1 load of laundry a night while making dinner, which stopped the OVERLOAD on the weekned. When the weekend comes, I'd do a quick pick up and vaccume, the rest of the weekend was mine to spend with my family. As your son gets older, it will become easier to get stuff done while he entertains himself and can even help. My son likes to switch the laundry from the washer to the drier (he's 6), but I do remember feeling exhausted like you when he was younger. Let go, don't be so hard on yourself. I also notice in the winter, I'm tired much earlier and have a lower energy level, but when the weather gets better and I'm outside more, the energy levels go up too, maybe that's part of the issue with you, cabin fever can really get to people.

Hi C.,
Having a baby ususally equals not having a spotless house anymore. You need to focus on your priorities - doing your job, spending your time with your baby and husband, taking care of yourself. I found with my first baby, when I went back to work at 8 weeks, that I was doing okay - baby usually slept through the night and at 8pm, I had a couple of baby free hours to spend with hubby or get things done. My 2nd was another matter. I was back at work at 11 weeks, had a baby that was still up a couple of times a night (at least), dealing with pumping, in a commuter marriage, teaching a couple of nights a week after work, active 4 year old. What I found helped me with feeling exhausted and overwhelmed was having some time for me. I never felt guilty about working, I enjoyed my job and being a financial partner in the marriage, and I still allowed myself time away from the kids. I went to yoga class once or twice a week. I would come home 15-20 minutes before picking up the kids at daycare so I could empty the dishwasher, throw dinner together, quickly run the vacuum or scour the tub, wash the pump, etc so that I didn't need to do those things when I got the baby and my 4 year old home. I also hired a friend's teen daughter for a couple of hours a week to help out with some chores - the 2 hours cost me $10 and was money well spent.
Are you breastfeeding and pumping for your baby? If so, I know that your breaks are taken up with that, like mine were. If you are not, I would spend lunch/break time walking. It'll help with the weight issue and exercise can give you MORE energy.
Hugs and good luck!

C., I definitely feel your pain! But it does get easier, you get used to it. I have one child and work full time as well. I also have a thyroid issue and chronic fatigue syndrome. I am ALWAYS tired! A few bits of advice that you may have already gotten, so I will reinforce those that arent new:

1. This WILL get easier as the baby gets older and more independant and you get used to the new schedule
2. Your child and your health come first
3. The laundry, vaccuming and dishes will STAY where they are, your child won't. Focusing on a clean house in your non-existent spare time means a clean house, and missed time with your son!
4. Enlist your husband for house help. Chores should be shared.
5. Start to get your son involved in chores. He can learn to do simple things now and more as he grows. Start early and you will grow a helpful man who understands that housework belongs to both husband and wife.
6. Do get your thyroid tested.
7. Get into doing SOME sort of exercise. Even 10 minutes a day will boost your energy.
8. Take vitamins.

I understand that no one wants to live it a pigsty and I am not condoning having a dirty house. But dirty and "Better Homes and Gardens" beautiful are two very different things. You can have a clean house that isnt perfect all the time and have time for your family. I hope that helps. Best of luck and hang in there!

I am a grandma so maybe this advice might be old fashion to some. First and formost you have to remember in this chapter of your life you are doing children {in your case child} right now. Your child is the most prescious thing in thw world. Clean houses, fancy dinners, and everything in its place really dont matter. Time and availibility to your child is most important . Children spell Love--TIME. It took me awhile to understand it but it works. Hope and pray for you.

Just an idea but you will lose 1/2 to 1 pound a day until your weight is normal and have way more energy all from natural, organic, raw, vegan, Kosher, celiac-approved chocolate sweetened with Xylitol which is good for the teeth and also anti-bacterial (Candida-killer). One piece before meals.

See (leave out the spaces): www. skinny with chocolate .com

If it looks good to you, there's a very real chance to replace your job income within a very short time. I started working at home a few years ago and was out-earning my hubby pretty quickly.

It's no wonder you're tired. Working at a job when you're a Mom is tough work and exhausting. Be sure to get your hubby on board with cleaning too!

One thing that's rather hard to deal with is this: You will NEVER catch up. Work and family is an ongoing project. It's called life. I was like you and needed to have everything spotless. That will happen when you have no more children at home and then you'll be wishing for some mess!

All the best to you,

S.

It really does sound like you have a hectic life! Whew! I don't know how I'd do if I worked full time w/ kids on top of it. I'm 10 months pregnant and work full time and than come home and work my online business at night. By the time my baby is born at the end of Sept. I plan on having my income completely supplemented. I know it's so possible b/c the company that I work for is amazing. I've seen such incredible progress since the beginning. If you are interested in trying to work from home and completely supplement your income, please let me know. I'd love you talk to you about it. No obligations, just set a time and I can discuss it with you and see if it works for you. contact info:
E. Stewart
###-###-####
____@____.com
workathomeunited.com/erinstewart

Sounds familiar. I'm working full time and taking classes and it can be draining. Best advice... cut yourself some slack with housework and accept help! For the first few months I was back at work I felt like I had to prove that I could do it all myself. I was tired and crabby and angry at my husband for surfing the net and hanging out with the baby. He had offered several times to help, but I always assured him that I was fine. By November I was exhausted all the time and finding myself frustrated with the lack of time to schedule a haircut and a dental appointment b/c of things that "had" to get done.

My husband reminded me that he had offered to do his share and we sat down and figured out a way to divide chores to fit both of our schedules and personalities. He grocery shops as well as I do and cleans the bathrooms better! We also started rotating who got up with the baby in the morning (early riser) so that the sleep deprivation was less draining.

Talk with your husband and let him know that you're stressed and drained and see if he can help. Remember that the floor doesn't need to be spotless EVERY day and that buying more undies to put off laundry isn't a crime!

C., I can understand how you feel and it's a new adjustment when you have your first child....and having to work as well. You probably have heard from mothers not to worry about keeping your home neat. I mean, I was the same way but I've learned that I haveto be flexible when having children. Things come up unexpectedly and your home will always be there and your son will grow up and he will and does not remember your house being messy. I keep my home clean as far as dirty wise, but neat.......impossible. I mean, you can start teaching him now how to put things away and it's not too early. He'll enjoy it and may even do it when you didn't expect him to....:) Please do not feel bad about being tired and it's truly understandable and naturally to keep energy level....well, make sure you are eating healthy and when you come home and have dinner, make it a family activity going out for a walk afterwards and yes it's cold, but children love going outside even for 15 minutes. Being out in the fresh air is good for us all. Exercise, even just walking, will boost your energy level and you'll notice it each day that you have a little more energy. Are you taking vitamins? It's important that you do. I just found out that I have vit D deficiency...well, I am not taking meds for that. I am going to eat the foods that contain vit D and if you're interested, let me know and I'll share it with you. Just remember, he'll grow up fat and doing a little bit of activity like walking and it's tiresome but it's a good thing for you and your family. Let me and all mothers what the udates and what you have done or will do. Keep us posted :) If you want to contact me, I'm here and I'll get as soon as I possibley can.

Hi C.,
Unless you have a fantastic career that fulfills you every day, quit. The stress you are feeling is not good for you or your family. Go to my website and see if working from home is right for you: www. Work At Home United. com /L.
and leave out the spaces. I truly look forward to working with you.
L.

C.,
I know its a bi late but as you I never have time for much with a 16yr old and a 7 yr old its hard. With my first I always thought I was wonder women working full time going to school spotless house the works, but guess what she grew up and I didn't enjoy her like I should and the house is still there. With my son I enjoy as much as I can still work full time done with school but now we own our house and have a dog. My house is not a dirty but it is not spotless either we do what we can between work,school,practices,games, dance, ccd. I took one of my patients advice enjoy them while there home the mess the shoes left behind the book bag toys everything because they will grow up and you have all the time in world to clean your house and you'll miss your kids mess.

Hope it helps
L.

Right there with you! I work full time M-F. Ihave since my son weas 10 weeks old. I have ebstein barr virus/chronic fatigue on top of being a new mommy. SO TIRED! I have NO ENERGY. I've been drinking A LOT OF CAFFEINE - my son is almost two now, I'm not promoting that though (so if you too are drinking caffeine or eating a lot of sugar, cut it out too!) b/c this week I am actually kicking the habit b/c I know its not good. Kicking it has been TERRIBLE! But I'm doing it in the hopes of gaining natural energy again once I get over the withdrawal. Vitamins, lots of water, healthy eating throughout the day, I walk during my lunch break - or sleep in my car during my lunch break on those days that are really difficult. (especially now that I'm cutting out caffeine) I try to go to bed as soon as my son goes to bed - if I can't do that b/c I have to do things to get ready for the next day then I make sure I have a cut off time, otherwise I'm doing stuff until all hours of the night. I try to do as much as I can at night or in the morning when my son is asleep. Being as organized and as simple as possible helps me and honestly - not letting things build up - even if it means a little extra work at night. Crock pot cooking. Take out. Simple meals. Use as few dishes/pots/pans as possible. If I'm to tired at night then I just go to bed and make sure I get up a little earlier in the morning, I'm more refreshed then - sometimes its easier to do that - rather than just keep pushing myself at night when you're already exhausted. Don't get me wrong, my house is by no means perfect, I'm simply talking about the daily dishes, the laundry on the bedroom floors and a few other items that get thrown around throughout the day. The harder stuff gets done whenver I get to it! My husband helps out a lot though too - we're lucky that he works a split shift and has time during the day - alone to get a lot of basic chores done, but if he doesn't - oh well, they get done when they get done. I just like to have the kitchen sink empty at night. ; ) I haven't gotten myself back into a good exercise routine - but I was running/walking in the summer and I found that helped a lot - finding the time is so hard but the days are getting longer again, so that helps! The warmer weather that hopefully will be here soon too helps motivate the exercise routines. Yoga was relaxing and energizing too. Gaiam has a great a.m./p.m. yoga - each routine is only like 15 minutes long. I love the a.m. yoga and try to get up in the morning to do it - but since the winter came its been hard. I'm still trying to find energy but I've made it through almost two years, so hopefully something I do will help you.