Will Have 2 Under the Age of 2...encouragement Needed

Hi N.!

Just wanted you to know that my husband and his sister are about a year apart in age and it was a very good experience for them. They were each other's constant companions from the beginning, which my MIL says was a huge help to her. They kept each other entertained.

To this day, they are very good friends. I know it is because they bonded so well so early on.

Just tune all those naysayers out!

B.

Hi N.,
My children are 7 and almost 6. They are 19 months apart. We love the fact that they are so close together in age. The play together all the time. At first it is a little hard to balence both children. Just be ready to hold both of them at the some time.

Mine are 15 1/2 months apart and I love it!! They are best friends and they always want to be together. They will learn and grow together and the older one will teach the younger one stuff and it's so neat to just sit back and watch. Congratulations!!

I have 3 that were close in age like yours when they were younger. They are now teenagers and very close. It is a wonderful experience and as they grow up together they also learn from each other. You are going to be amazed at how hard it is at first but the rewards in the future are far greater than any challenges you may have at this point. Hang in there and you will see how strong and superhuman you will become. It is such a blessing to have children and you should thank the Lord that he has given you this opportunity to be their mother. Take care and Good Luck!!

Hey N.,

You will love having your kids close together! Mine were 20 months apart (I wanted 3, but hubby wanted only 2). My only advice is, take afternoon naps with your 17mo. old when you can...you will need them! I would put Ryan in his crib and then read to Kayla and take a nap with her. And find activities you can do with both. We had a lot of pretend "tea parties" with Kayla and Ryan on my lap!

M.

I had 4 babies in 3 years. (twins in the middle) It is very difficult to say the least. Their dad left when they were 1,3,3,and 5. All of the kids are 18 months apart. What surprised me the most was how everyone will gladly come up to you and say "my, you have your hands full" but then just watch you struggle to get things done.
You need to be able to ask for what you need.
Best of luck to you. It gets better the older they get.

Hi N.!

I had 2 babies 15 months apart. My daughter just turned 2 last week, and my son is 9 months old. I won't lie... it was and is tough...but worth EVERY SECOND. Just know ahead of time that you will NOT get to nap again for a long, long time! My son is at the age now where my daughter is realizing that he's actually going to be fun to have around. They are becoming fast friends. My daughter was only 15 months old when we brought home her brother, and surprisingly she wanted to help hold and feed him from the start. I was really nervous (and even feeling a bit guilty) about having babies so close together, but honestly... it is SO WORTH IT!

I won't say too much because you have received so many wonderful responses and it can be a lot to take in. Last August I had my second child 18 months after having my first. Everywhere I go I am bombarded with comments of how crazy I am and how I must have my hands full, but I honestly wouldn't change it. We didn't plan this, the Lord decided we needed another and I am ever so grateful. My kids get along great! They play well together, but most importantly, I can see a deep love between them. I have never witnessed anything so sweet and precious and I am grateful for a daily witness of pure, unconditional love. Have fun with your little ones. God Bless!

My first two kids were 6 years apart which was easier on me but they are too far to ever appreciate or do anything together. My last two (in my 40's) were born 16 months apart (this was NOT planned!) My girls are now four and the little-one will be three in three-months and I could not be more thrilled and surprised by their love and devotion to one another!!!!! They are PERFECT playmates - not to say they don't fight because they do but are complete devoted on each other. They act more like twins - they will tell me when something is wrong with the other, the older one interprets for her soft-spoken younger one. They have constantly entertained one another which makes it easier for getting housework done. Relax and enjoy, it'll be fun!

N.,

I come from a family of 4 and we are all very close in age - 33, 30, 29 & 27 (almost 28) and I cannot imagine it any other way. Although there will be difficulties I think to positives will definitely outweigh them. We were very close growing up and still are today. We always had a playmate nearby. Because we were close in age there was not a lot of conflict about who gets to stay up later - we all had the same bedtime. When it came to activities/sports we were sometimes able to be on the same team because of the closeness of our age = less driving around for mom! Clothes can be handed down before they go out of style! We were able to get along well in school because we always had to share and could relate well to kids our age because we had been practicing since we were born. Another bonus, your 17 mo. old will still be napping so when the new baby naps you will still get a nap in as well! I could go on and on....

Good luck to your growing family and God Bless You!

Bless your sweet heart!!! I had 3 in three years, two in diapers for 2 years! I also got the negative comments, even from total strangers in the grocery store when I was trying to buy food and manage an infant and two toddlers. My first two were actually 9 1/2 months apart . . .we adopted and I got pregnant a month later. Number 3 came 22 months after the second. First, pace yourself. Don't try to be superwoman. Don't beat yourself up if everything you planned doesn't get done. Love and enjoy your babies while they are babies! Everything else will be there long after they are no longer babies. Your children will develop a close relationship. They will make wonderful memories together. My daughters are in their late 30s now and remain very close. Try to keep life as simple as you can and enjoy the baby days. They are so quickly gone. Love, J.

N., I can totally relate! I gave birth to identical twin boys when my first son was only 17 months old. It was tough at first! I felt so guilty that my oldest son was not getting what he needed from me because I was so exhausted and overwhelmed with the twins. But it does get better and you are very blessed to have family near by who is willing to help, and great that your husband gets 3 wks off. My husband was only off from work for a few days here and there, not consecutively, and we have no family closer than a 10 hr car drive. So luckily my mom was able to take a leave of absence from her job and came to help for almost 4 wks, but then we were on our own. I was off for 8 wks then went back to work. The first few months will be hard, but here is what I suggest that worked for us. Make time to spend 1 on 1 with your oldest son. Have your husband feed the baby while you play a game or read to your older son, and as he gets a little older, have someone come stay with the baby and both you and your husband take your oldest son out for a special day of fun! It makes a world of difference for him to see that there are times when he gets you both all to himself and does not "ALWAYS" have to have the baby around.

With that in mind, do also incorporate him in the new babys life as much as possible too....as he gets older have him help bring you diapers, hold babys bottle, pat babys back to burp, stuff like that. My twins are now 18 months old and my big boy will be 3 in July, and they are the best of friends. That is the beautiful thing of having them so close together. They play together, they laugh together, the twins try to copy what they see big brother doing. It's really heart warming to watch them together. So you hang in there and if you ever need more encouragement and emotional support or just need to vent, please feel free to email me: ____@____.com _ Best Wishes! J.

Don't be discouraged by the negative comments by people who have not been in your situation. I know plenty of moms with close babies and they all say it was better that way than spreading them out. I have two "sets" of kids; my seven and eight year old girls are 15 months apart and my two yo baby girl and 3 yo son are 18 months apart. I cannot tell you how close they are, all of them! There are so many wonderful things about having kids close together but I guess the basics would be that you get through the diapers faster; rather than starting over four years down the road, you are still in that baby stage when your new one comes along; and the best part is that your kids will be like best friends growing up together. You are blessed honey, be happy! Your son will need a little bit of adjustment but in both of my experiences, it didn't take more than a couple of weeks. If you need more positive, let me know and I'll be happy to pass along more stories. Good luck and God bless.

My girls are 17 months apart and for the most part I love it! They are 3 & 4 and r-e-a-l-l-y know how to push each others buttons, but majority of the time play awesome together! They are really close and I tell them all the time how lucky they are to have each other.
It was tough in the beginning and I spent a lot of time feeling sorry for my 17mo old~tried to spend lots of quality time with each. However, my final thought was that the older child would have not memories in life that didn't include the baby- know what I mean? It seems to go through phases of diffifult, and then easier - and then new milestones happen and it gets difficult, and then easier again.
It will all work out - ignore what others say, its not them who will be dealing with it!
Good Luck!

It is difficult at any time with a newborn period but it is not so bad with 2 under 2. My youngest boys are 16 months apart and it is now a love/hate relationship but overall they do play a lot together. They are 1 and 3 (just turned). It is fine, not always easy but I have them now on almost the same schedule and its actually kind of nice at times. They both still nap! Remember this though, my best advice ever given by my mother when I had my second...always put the baby down because he won't remember but the other one will. Good luck!

I had our two children almost exactly 2 yrs apart. It was challenging at first, because the older one was not quite yet completely independent with self feeding and toilet training. So at first..I didnt know who to attend to first. But then we figured out to be more patient with each other and "taking turns" became a very important lesson. Good thing you have a lot of help. I did for the first couple of weeks..but then I was on my own when everyone went home and back to work.
Now they are 10 and 8 and are the best of friends !! They are very close and I would not have done it any other way. Best of everything to you...enjoy them because even though it may not feel like it right now...they grow up very quickly !!

Having two young children will be hard, but I really dont think it will be as bad as people make it out to be. They key for you is putting your energy and focus into a positive outcome. Here are the positives:
1. They will be close in age
2. Because they are close in age they will have more of a bond.
3. By including your 17 month old in helping take care of the newborn and interracting with her, she will not develop a jealousy towards her and in turn want to help more, which then benefits you.
4. Regardless of the small differences in age, having children in itself is positive and a blessing.
I could go one, seriously, but I think some of those things help you to realize both reasons. You can go either way on this one. The IMPORTANT thing is that you believe what is in your heart and not what other people tell you. As a mother, you must put your foot down and be STRONG. Strong in nature and in heart. It is your duty to stand up for your beliefs. Honestly, you dont even have to really take in what I say or anybody else does. It may be hard at times but it is nothing you cannot get through.
God DOES NOT give you a cross , you cannot carry.Good luck!

We traveled to the other side of the world and adopted two at the same time. We left with zero children and returned after spending a month overseas as 2 clueless parents with 2 babies to raise. This was 2.5 years ago and we all transitioned just fine (utterly insane moments, but we made it!) Two well adjusted toddlers and two happy parents. Think you get a lot of negative "you got your hands full" comments, imagine us! You will be fine...Enjoy the journey!

Mine are 14 months apart (just as my brother and I were which I loved) - my son is just 16 and daughter will be 15 in July.....I am single and have been since they were infants - I have loved having them this close - yes, there are 'days' but that is such a small part.....everything is done together, they enjoy each other's friends and have so much in common.....enjoy them as babies and ignore stupid people....

Dear N. C,

Two words--Built-in Playmates!!! I myself have a brother who is only 16 months younger than I am. My grandchildren are 16 months apart. I have twin cousins that I baby sat when I was 12. I've lived it and observed it, and it can work very well.

My brother and I were so close that we even double dated in high school. He was always very protective of me. He acted more like a big brother. It was great! When I was elected as football sweetheart (a big deal in Texas!), it was supposed to be a surprise, but he came straight home and told me.

My grandchildren are the same way. My grandson, the oldest, is very protective of his younger sister. They too are very close.

Of course, they fight (as my brother and I did and my twin cousins did), but all siblings do, regardless of age.

Believe it or not, in spite of the fact that your oldest will still be quite young when the new baby is born, he will be a "helper". You will be able to tell him to "bring you a diaper" (or whatever), and he will be able to do it. He will be proud to be a "big brother". My advice is to start building that up now, if you haven't already. Make him feel important. Make sure he feels like he is a part of the process, so he doesn't feel threatened by the new baby.

Don't let the nay sayers get you down. This is YOUR baby, not theirs! Enjoy your children.

I've already said a prayer about this. May God bless all of you!

Deb D

I have two boys they are 15 months and 29 days apart. They are now 4 and nearly 3. They are the best of friends. They honestly can't stand to be away from each other.
I never had to deal with the older one being jealous of the little one... He doesn't remember a time when his little brother was not around.

Your hands will be full the first couple of years but then they will start playing together... and life will all of a sudden get simpler.

Blessings on your whole family as you enter this time. Do not be afraid to ask for help and make sure you take time to go on dates with your husband.

mine are 17 mos. appart and my oldest is 2 1/2!

The first couple of mos. may be difficult to get your "groove" but after that, the two are so close that they are best friends and constant companions! This really starts taking shape once the younger one is moving good (even if just scooting)! Let the older one feel involved in thaking care of the younger and the bond will begin! And think about when they will be in the same activities at the same time instead of having to run in two different directions since their age puts them in different preferences/catagories!

You will be fine! Just take it day by day at first and try to ballance your time as best as you can until you find your neche! Treat your kids cries as an ER: serve the most critical first and then tend to the next critical!

Best of luck: you will do fine!

Take lots of pics/vidoe for every moment will become a blur in the hustle and bustle of your life! It will fly by so fast that you won't know where it all went!

Dear N.,
It can be done and can be rewarding for both you and the children. I had a boy (my first) and 15mos later a girl, they were very close emotionally and almost like twins. Did not have to deal with any of the jealousness that comes when the first is a lot older. Good luck, I find God knows what he is doing when we get pregnant unexpectedly. B.

My two children are 20 months apart, and yes, it can be very difficult, especially the first year, but there are lots of positives! I have really enjoyed them being at about the same level and interested in the same things at the same time. I think this makes family outings more fun and don't have to worry about an older child getting bored or a younger child not being able to participate. But the greatest thing about them being so close in age is they are each other's constant companions. This is great when they are young because they can entertain each other instead of you having to entertain them all the time! My daughter is now 7 and my son is 6. They have a great bond and many adults I know who are very close in age to their siblings tell me that bond holds fast today. They are literally growing up together, going through similar situations at the same time, and they support and sympathize with each other. I also like them being at the same school for several years. This is conveinient for me(one drop off, one pick up)and comforting to know that they are there to help each other when I am not around, which they do. I was scared when I found out I was having my 2nd so close to my 1st (I had JUST weaned my daughter)but it has turned out to be an amazing blessing, and now I can't imagine it any other way. It's great that you will have help from your family - take it! Even just a 10 minute break can save your sanity sometimes ;) Congratulations!!

N.,

My kids are 2 1/2 years apart. They are now 13 and 15 and my son is in high school, my daughter in her last year of middle school. They are the best of friends. It has always been that way. Another bonus is that potty training is a breeze, you do double duty (and dooty!) but then bam! Done!

Good luck. Try to enjoy what YOU have for what it is (and what it is not) and let ugly people not phase you. I know it's easier said than done, but in the end, it's all you have anyway.

Best,
E.

It will be great! Mine are 19 mos. apart so I know the feeling. But it is so sweet to see them play together and love on each other. Right now they're 2 1/2 and 4 - I can't take enough pictures of all they're cute moments together. The biggest change is just getting use to 2 children instead of 1! But you'll love it. I'm so glad we had ours close together.

Hi Nicole! Congratulations on baby one and two! Dont sweat the small stuff (negative stuff). They dont know what they are missing! Most of the ones that have responded have kids that are 16 and up months apart! My brothers were 11 months apart and were very close even through their adult years!
My children my daughter is 5 now and my son is 4. They were exactly 13 months 10 days apart (my son was two months early) they were close from the start and they remain close now! Yes they have their differences but they love being so close in age.
It will work out great and your whole family will have a blast growing up together!
Best of luck and God Bless!
P.S. When my son was born my mother went out and bought them a blanket animal the fuzzy little tag along animals for babies.toddlers, my son got a puppy and my daughter got a pink teddy and they still have them to this day but my mom had them given to the other sibling from the other (brother to sister and sister to brother)!! It was a great idea to break the ice with a new brother or sister at that age.

My cousins are 14 mos. apart and have always been so close. They are now 39 and 40. My aunt and uncle are 9 mos and 1 week apart. They are also very close. They always talk about how much fun it was. I am only two years and 2 mos. older than my brother, and although we had our ups and downs high school was great! We had a lot of the same friends, and now as adults he is one of my closest friends. I am sure it is rough at times, but I can tell you having two boys almost five years apart is not so easy. They have totally different interests and they are on different levels. So don't let anyone get you down. There are pros and cons to everything, try to focus on the pros! Good luck and may God Bless your family.

H. M.

N., I know what you are going through our girls are 2 1/2 and 1 1/2 (16 months apart). We also have teenagers that are 18 and 14, so we are quite busy. It is was hard when the baby was first born because the other one wanted my attention all of the time. At times I felt guilty because I couldn't give each of them the time that they needed. Now that they are older, they are the best of buddies. They play well together and keep each other occupied. Don't listen to the negative comments. You have to keep motivated and realize that the tough times are only temporary. My husband was very supportive and that helped alot too. Congratulations and know that you can do it.

Hi N.,

My brother and I are 4y 9mo apart and although we are good friends now, we weren't always. I'm still treated as the baby sister (I'm 26) who knows less than everyone else. Drives me crazy. My bro always took care of me, but we had one year kindergarten/fifth grade of being in the same school together and that was it. We both had to start new schools alone. We didn't have the same friends, didn't do the same things, went through different life experiences. I think it would have been better had we been closer together, but Mom and Dad saw it differently. So, tell others and their rude comments to blow. It might be hard at first but it'll be worth it. Anyway, just my experience. Hope this helps.

Why would it be unrealistic to be bombarded with positive aspects of having 2 so close in age? I have a boy Jan.2,200 and a girl Jan.8,2001 and couldn’t imagine it any other way. We are such a close family and enjoy each other so much because of the closeness in age. Those woman who say negative stuff about having kids so close just don’t get it. You spend the first few years of having a child doing the same things weather you have one, two or however many. We do so many more things together because they can both enjoy them verses taking one here for their age appropriate activities and the other somewhere else. It is actually easier to enjoy theme parks and libraries and lots of places having only to go to one area. We have found it really is easy having the same routine for the two and they have the same rules. Get an infant carrier like the Bjorn would be my advice. You will need free hands for that 2yr. old. You can join toddler classes and enjoy them with both kids and so much more. There will be modifications to what you do with two but as they get older they will get closer to the same abilities. It is kind of like the under two kids, the 2-5, 6-12,15-18 are the age groups of major differences. Besides, they will always have each other. My two are quite different but their age brings them together. All kids of certain age like to do certain things like babies slash their hands in water, toddlers run through water, kids swim, ete. You are going to find it way easier than the non-supporters will have you believe. Find what works and go with it. Routines and Rules will help keep the peace. I am not one to follow either well and have envied my friends who have. I do see it makes a difference even with the ones we do use in our home. Bed time is nonnegotiable. That will make or break a couple because of the toll it takes on each parent and the time it robs from the alone time so needed together. That is off subject but it is worth mentioning because with two the trouble is double. When one child sees the other child is getting away with not going to bed that child decides to do the same. Anyways, there will be many other things like group hugging that only two little kids close in age will find so fun. By the way, I am also due in Aug. and am already planning to have another within the next year or so to follow. We couldn’t imagine having them farther apart. My older two are so supportive of one another and just have the greatest time together. My son loves being the older brother while still playing many things his sister wants to. I think having them so close helps them to see things from different prospective. They have learned to be patient and kind from an early age because there is always someone else to consider. I could go on and on but I see that this is a little scatterbrained because I am homeschooling and not being able to finish my thoughts but you get the points I am trying to make. Your kids will have many strengths because of each other and so many blessings that it will outweigh the few struggles you will have along the way because of their closeness in age. So congrats!! Enjoy group nap times T.

I had 2 under 2 as well. Mine were about 20 months apart. Someone told me "if you can make it through the 1st 3 years, it will be easy after that..." I almost fell out! For me, I found things got easier after 3 months. The first 3 months with any new baby is hard, but with a little one and a new one, it's challenging. But, after about 3 months, you have the baby on a schedule, hopefully your older one is on a schedule, and you will start to get a handle on things. I will also say that one day I turned around and thought "this isn't so bad" and lo and behold, my youngest was 3! Amazing! It's really nice to have them close together b/c when you start doing stuff like the zoo, park, etc., it's easier when they are both happy doing the same things. Don't be discouraged, people do it all the time, and it's not as bas as you might think! Try to sleep when you can, get help when you can, and just figure out tricks to make things work for your family!

I had mine 13 months apart. I would not trade that experience for anything. My son was so devoted to his baby sister. I have some of the most precious memories and photos of their early childhood. They were NEVER a problem. I can't imagine having 2 or 3 years between my kids. They were adorable and continue to be to this day. They are now 30 and 29. My sisters and I were each 13 months apart. I am now 49, Kim is 48, and Kat will be 47 in November. We were and still are the best of friends. No complaints from this mom or sister. My mother had the six of us during a 10 year period and we have always been extremely close. I say hooray for you and your husband and most especially for your babies!!!

My first two children were 16 months apart. The next child was born 18 months later. I had a blast with three children so close together. There were some trying times, but they played together very well when they were young. The best advice I can give you is to keep them on a schedule. Eventually, if you can get both children to nap and eat at the same time, you can have some quiet time for yourself. then you will be able to tackle the rest of the day.

I have four children, ages 9 1/2 yr, 5 1/2 yr, 3 yr, and 20 months. Our last two children are only 16 months apart. I never intended to have children so close together, but after experiencing it, I wish I had all of them so close. Our youngest two are so close, we call them, "the twins". They just love each other. They share a bedroom, take naps and go down at bedtime together. The youngest has to do everything the older one does. They play together, hang out together, just everything. They are so fun to watch, and their bond is amazing. There were never any jealousy problems, everyone loved the baby from the start. She was "their" baby. I don't think it's been that much more work. If you're changing a diaper, why not just go ahead and change two, right? The hardest part is probably going shopping where they don't have double shopping carts, but we learn to adjust, and the payoff is great.

Well, I think that I win the contest for how close my children are. My girls will both be 5 this month, they are not twins amd neither is adopted. My oldest daughter was born in August and my second was born the following June. Therefore, they are 10 months and 9 days apart! I had people tell me all of the time that I was crazy, but you know what I did not care. I had not planned this, but God did. My girls are the best of friends and each other's protector and yes, they have their days where I am going crazy, but that is not because they are close in age, it is because they are kids. :-) It is wonderful having them close for numerous reasons. Just realize how blessed you are and throw the other comments out the window. I want to just reiterate what most everyone else said, enjoy this time because it will fly! Also, don't let the baby dominate your time where your oldest misses out. You need to intentionally set aside time for each child. Have a great time with your children and enjoy them as much as humanly possible.

I can remember wondering if I would survive it. I had a 3 year old 1 year old and a newborn. Now I I look back and I think that people are crazy to do it any other way. AT first it might be a bit challenging but that is only because life has to adapt to one more and has nothing to do with the age it is just making sure you leave enough time to feed 1 more dress one more...you get the picture I am sure. In November we will have a 5 year old 3 year old 2 year old and a newborn. As they have gotten older they are eachother's source of entertainment and they are best friends. Whatever one is doing the others want to do. Not to mention that if you kids are the same gender the can share clothes at a certain point.

Hi N.. I had mine like you, then a 3rd 18 months later. All I can say is one thing: Do what's urgent and important, and leave the rest for later. By later I mean either NEVER or IN 3 YEARS. You think I'm kidding, but I'm serious. Throw away projects you may never get to. Do not worry about writing thank-you notes. Do shopping after all the kids are in bed at 10pm. Bake a frozen pizza for dinner as often as you want. Buy pre-made stuff for dinner. What I'm trying to say is, accept that this will be difficult and don't beat yourself up (like I did) by thinking you "should" be doing it the harder way. You only have to answer to yourself. You are giving your older child a sibling and that is an amazing gift! Good Luck!!

I don't know what it is like to have two close together, but two little children are a blessing no matter how close or far apart they are in age. I've said a little prayer for you and your family that labor and delivery will go smoothly and that you will have the strength, patience, and energy with your 2 blessings. Congratulations and good luck with everything!!

Very dear friends of mine have a 2 year old and a 1 year old (both were unplanned :). When the second baby was born it was a little hard on mom but she got her routine down and before she knew it her oldest was able to help her get things for the baby. Even at their young age the kids love to play with each other and it is so much fun to watch them together.

At times it will be a lot, but it will be worth it. You have given your children the opportunity to grow up with someone and be life long friends. You are blessed.

I have 2 boys that are 21 months apart...my oldest is now 2 & 1/2 yrs old and youngest is 1 yr old. I won't lie and say it was easy, but looking back it wasn't that difficult, of course in the moment it did. It will get so much easier as the youngest gets older and is able to interact more. Just enjoy everyday b/c having 2 so close together brings out some very funny moments you will cherish forever as a mom. Seeing them play together is the BEST thing in the world, and my oldest loves his brother so much. If the youngest is napping the oldest wants to get him up, in the car my oldest is playing peek-a-boo and making my youngest crack up (i don't care who you are but when you hear a baby laughing hysterically, it is the funniest thing in the world). Now that my youngest is on the verge of walking, if I am away for a minute doing my "mommy chores" my oldest will call for me to come here if my youngest gets up and acts like he's going to walk. So there are some of "good" things that you will experience. I hope that eases you and makes you forget the negatives that everyone has offered up.

Just remember, how fast your oldest has grown up and how fast time has gone by, it is even faster with 2, there is no time to even give a bad moment or day a thought b/c it will quickly be gone. So just truly enjoy every minute especially that newborn baby stage because tomorrow they will be 1 and more independent, and the next day 15 and never home.

Good luck!

Although my kids are not going to be as close as yours I feel you on needing encouragement. I do have friends that have babies that close to each other. They say they have never regreted it for one minute because the children are SO close. They are able to play with each other and they defend each other even that much more. Every family is different and it sounds as though you are mentally ready for this new wonderful adventure. So have fun, enjoy and don't listen to all that negative talk. They are not a part of YOUR family, they have NO idea what is good for YOUR individual family. Good luck and enjoy those babies!!!

My 2 oldest are 18 months apart, and I LOVE it. That was perfect spacing for us. The boys play so well together. They are 9 (fixing to be 10) and 8. We are expecting our 4th child now, and the girls will be 17 months apart. It might be hard at the beginning, but as they start getting older you will love that age difference more and more.

I can tell you exactly what it will be like in about TEN DAYS!! My little girl will be 18 months on the 13th and I am having a little boy right after that.....I am freaked out, but SO MANY people have told me how WONDERFUL it is to have them so close together! Don't get me wrong, they have all said it wasn't easy at 1st, but nothing worth doing is easy! We are Mommies....we can do just about anything...It's going to take a little adjusting, but eventually we hope to get our babies on similiar schedules....I really think it's going to be great...I might be tired for another year, but hey, it's worth it!! Good luck!!

Hi Nicole! My 2 are 19 months apart. Some great things are that when baby was born the older was not jealous! She really didnt even notice the baby until he was older. Now they are 3 & 4 yrs old and they play soo well together! They never have to play by themselves because the other one is always there. They help each other out. Because they are so close they are really close on a developmental level as well. Everything we teach the older one the younger picks up very quickly. I hope that helps!
We have another on the way and I worry about jealousy because the younger one has been the baby for so long. I would have them all close together if it were up to me!

N.,

Sorry to hear about the negative comments. I have 3 under 2. Yes it is a lot of work, but i love coming home to my children. I like to watch how my oldest interacts with her brother and sister. She likes to kiss them and touch them. They will be able to grow up together and be close.

Well, as of today- I have 3 under 3! My oldest son will be three in September, and my younger son just turned 1 two weeks ago. Now our little girl is here! They were all planned and we're not used to three yet of course but the 20 month split b/w my first two I LOVE! They couldn't be closer friends! I loved having 2 under 2- you will too!

I can give positive encouragment!!! I have two within a year of each other - Dec 29, 2006 and then his sister on Dec 28, 2007. I am now 36. I have a 5 year old as well. The bond that the two little ones have is AMAZING!! Plus, it was so much easier going from "bottle to bottle" than having to pull out all the baby stuff again. I love it!! I would not advise it for everyone, but you are probably more than mature enough to take on the exciting adventure. Definitely get involved in a MOPS group, if you are not already. You will find how not alone you are... HAVE FUN!!!!

I had two little girls 17 mo. apart and it was not a problem. Just enjoy and don't get uptight about it. You are lucky to have them. Good luck.

I think it's great. My older 2 are 18 months apart. They are very close and I think it has helped out alot with transitioning into school, potty training and lots of other things. They always have a playmate! You are lucky that you will be getting some help - we've never had ANY from anyone - not grandparents, etc. So, after my second c-section, I was dropped off at home and left to my own devices while my husband went back to work. Don't let others negative thoughts bother you, and just enjoy what you have and make it a positive situation!

All 3 of my girls are close in age. My 1st and 2nd are 22 mos apart and my 3rd and 2nd are 18 mos apart and yes it was a handful but I would not have it any other way. They are so loving to each other always giving each other hugs and kisses. They do have their days but who doesn't. They are the best of friend, my oldest is so excited about her other sister joining her next year at school.
Enjoy every moment because they grow so fast.

Mine were exactly the same. My second was even born in August. It may be hard, but I found it very rewarding. I also think that is a smaller chance of jealousy that you would find in an older child. Since the first kid will never remember a time when the sibling wasn't around. And I can tell you that as they get older they will be closer. Mine are. They do alot of stuff together. Mine are extremely close. DOn't get me wrong they bicker, but they always work it out.
I also found that I have two sides on my lap. One kid sat on one side and the other sat on the, well other. I also color coded things of importance. The older child was green the younger blue. Like for blankies, pillow cases etc. As they get older it will make a difference when the "MINE" takes hold. It will be easy to solve when you already know who's it is.
I also coded socks by brand. One kid has the STAR socks, with a star and an "S". The next kid has grey and white socks, the third son has all white. I can tell from a distance who's socks are on the floor. I also don't sort laundry by color, but by person and each has their own hamper. We have 3 sons now, so at one time they were, ages 5, 3, newborn. SO the laundry thing is a real issue around here. As the kids get older some of the sizes and tastes change and it helps to keep everything seperate by person. Since I don't have to sort as much it goes smoother, and what sorting there is, I do upon placement in washer, and when I fold. Everything gets done in hot. But I have a new front loader washer/dryer and there is not a problem with that. I also don't worry about bleaching socks to my Grandmothers chagrine. They get holes and are worn out faster than ducks on a june bug. So there is not need to bleach. THere are few socks for hand-me downs.
Anyway, just enjoy your time. Have plenty of things to do for the older one, that will occupy his time and give him some alone time without the baby. And ask him to help as he will think he is big.
They will be a true joy and you will never be board. I would advise you to put the paint on a high shelf because the famous duo got into paint at least twice when the both 4 adn 2. The youngest wasn't around yet. They did get into mischief and it is almost like having twins the way they think up stuff to do and get into.
you will be fine. By the time son #2 came, the older one was sleeping through the night. So we did not have it to terribly hard.
They will get to dress up like Batman and Robin also, before they will choose their own Halloween. It was great to have the team theme for a while.
Good luck,
L.

HI N.,
Congrats ! I have done it twice! My first 2 are 24 and 23 now, 15 months apart, and my second two are 4 and 5 12.3 months apaart ! I would not do it any other way !
The first 2 to 3 years are the hardest, but after that the rewards are great! Hard becasue of fatique! Jsut take one day at a time and try and enjoy each day! Do not get upset over the small stuff, pick your battles, and run your house how it best works for your family! And try and make rest and sleep a priority when you can. Expecially for the first 2 to 3 years !
Good Luck,
K.

I am a 32 year old stay at home mom of a 20 month old girl and a 5 month old boy. It is really great.

When we first found out I was pregnant with our little man I was terrified... after all... I felt like I had just started to get the hang of one kiddo... I couldn't even fathom another... but honestly he doesn't require that much more work... and they love eachother! The nice thing is she was young enough when he was born that she shouldn't even remember a time when she was an only child... and sharing I see is much easier for her than my friends children who are farther appart. I realize now that up front it may be more work, but in the long run this will be MUCH easier... they will be able to entertain eachother and will be peers... it will be nice to have kids that are friends. And even though she was only 15 months when he was born... I was amazed at how big a help she was and is! She brings clean diapers, burp towels toys etc for him... and because they are so close and she is petite... he can wear her diapers if needed. She also has a pretty good grasp on the differences between boys and girls and mamas and papas... hahaha. She is now potty training and he is on the verge of eating... now she tries to feed him, teach him about his body parts, show him new toys and how to play with them, taught him how to roll over both directions (a bit sooner than he would have prefered) and is always the first to go running to his side when he cries... its really funny. I think it has been really good for her social development. She is much more interactive and less likely to "parallell play" than most of her friends. They will be sharing a room soon... he has been in our room since birth because it is just easier... for everyone, but once he is sleeping through the night he'll be in the crib in the kid's room... she's been in a toddler bed since about 2 weeks after he came home from the hospital... she just decided she was big enough I guess. She was really impressed with the baby and is still facinated by him.

For me what is hard is getting out and shopping... I'm starting to get the hang of that too. It was really a matter of finding the right carrier for him... he runs really hot and wants to face out... he hated the wrap and mai tei, but loves the baby bjorn... my daughter was the exact opposite. I plan trips well before nap time so they can fall asleep on the way home or I wait till after naps. I wear him and put her in the basket... that way they can "talk" to each other which gives me a good chance to actually make it through my list before a tantrum occurs. I also let her crawl in from the front passangers seat and get ineo her own car seat... she loves to do this and it makes it much easier for me. They do good at places like Target and the mall where there are lots of things to look at... clothes shopping is another story however... I just have to leave them with grammi for that. When I have doctors appointments I leave her with a friend and I bring him along. She gets to play and he gets to spend some good one on one time with mama. Most of my friends have kids close to our kids's ages which helps alot... but always looking for new ones to add to our circle!

Oh and by the way... I breastfed them both... no problem... she weaned herself when she saw him eating... about a week after he came home from the hospital.

You will be just fine... I promise! I honestly think my friends whose kids are 2+ years appart have it harder than I do.

Your going to have good and bad times but thats life and one child brings the same too. However your kids will be very close and will really know what sharing and getting along with others is all about! Your children will also have each other when there older and a close bond because there so close in age. My theroy is if you gotta change one diaper you might as well change two! Your already used to no sleep and getting no attention or me time so the more the merrier right! You will be fine, just ask for help, pray and dont over think. Have faith. God Bless and good luck let us know how it goes!

you know, God does these things for a reason and I guess you're meant to have kids that close in age. My mom and my aunt are really close and my mom is all my aunt has...it was supposed to be that way. they're best friends. besides if it makes you feel better i think i might be in the same boat as you. my son is 9 mths and i've already missed two periods, i guess we'll find out soon. good luck and don't let anyone discourage you. God bless!
by the way, my grandma had 10 kids and they are all close in age, she was pregnant for literally half of her life and i dont think anyone would have changed it. crowded house but a lot of love...and misgif lol

Oh my-- I had mine 15 months apart. I can't believe you get negative comments-- it has been AWESOME! I have 2 girls, and from day 1, they were best friends. AS they've grown up, it has been like having twins. People always assume that they are twins. They ended up being 2 years apart in school-- just barely missing the cutoff for being 1 year apart. They share everything, and they do everything together-- it is a built in best friend. Having 2 in diapers wasn't hard either. Honestly, the only thing "hard" was being sleep deprived for about 2 years straight. But, my kids were never particularly fussy (my oldest one never ever cried), nor were they high strung. They could sit and watch Noggin, play quietly with dolls, or splash in a baby pool for long periods of time. I cherish every single moment of their childhood. Now that they are both in school, I get very emotional. It is so hard watching them grow up. So instead of listening to anything negative, approach each day with the understanding that it is a gift, and etch each moment in your memory. For me, there was nothing "tough" about it (except for recovering physically from childbirth)-- it is amazing. I wouldn't do it any differently for sure-- i'd even recommend that everyone have their kids close together in age. Congratulations!

I have four children, ages 8, 4, 2 and 9 months. Trust me... for every negative comment you hear you will get a hundred smiles and giggles a day from both your little ones and that makes all the other stuff so worth it! Just remember to enjoy every minute of it b/c it goes by so quick! Congrats!

Just wanted you to know how very special it can be having two close together. I have 5 children and #'s 3 & 4 were 18 months apart. It had it's moments of course but we are all very close. Shortly after my 5th was born, I became a single mom. It was a struggle but I raised the 5 for 17 years as a single mom. We have always been very close and maybe the struggles made it that way even though they don't seem to remember any struggles. Praise God and the innocence of childhood! Know that of course there will be stressful times but all in all they will be so very close and there will be many happy memories.
God Bless,
D.

Dear Nicole:

I'm the oldest in my family, with my sister 16 months younger than me and a brother 14 months younger than her! Yes, mom had her hands full for a while, with all three of us in diapers together, but it worked out. We all shared the same group of friends because our ages are so close, and even shared a high school class together!

Because we were so close in age, my sister and I were and still are best friends. Having children close together is MUCH better than vast distances where they don't know one another.

It will be busy at first, but, like my dad used to tell people, after we got out of diapers we started taking care of each other, so things got easier!

Enjoy your family!

L. F.

Wow you received lots of great responses. Just know there are plenty of us out there with two kids close in age. Mine are 16 months apart and I love it. I get comments all the time, but I love my life. My children are now 15 months and 31 months old they are the best of friends. It will be wonderful raising two children under 2 :).

Congrats! I wish my sister (who is 7 years older) and I could have been closer in age, the age difference meant that we were essentaially raised seperatly (she had moved out when she was 17) and never did have a chance to become close friends. Your children have a great opportunity to grow up together and develop a bond that will carry them through life. Sure, some aspects may be harder on you- but some will be easier. They will be close in developmental stages and interests will be more similar so play, movies, vacations- all may be easier to pick.

I know a lady that has 2 year old twins AND 6 month old twins- I figure if she can survive (and she does well, she just loads them up and goes to playgroups or walmart....) then most of us probably can too. Watch some of that show Jon and Kate plus 8, your work load will seem somewhat lighter.

Did that...got the T shirt. My daughter's are 11 and 9 now (will be 10 in August.) Take plenty of pictures, video and accept help from anyone willing to do so. Don't try to potty train the 17 month old now, just wait because they will revert to being and wanting to be the baby. IF you nurse...just remember to get the younger set in a movie or activity because then you will become very frustrated.( no sense in all of that). It gets much easier as they get older and if they are same sex siblings then in a few years you will have a blast (as mine are girls). Take time for you. And with having a 5 year old son now, if you are planning a third do it soon also, it is much harder having a child and them realizing you are spending ALL YOUR time with that new baby. A little about me....36 yo mother of 3 ages 11,9,5, and have been happily married to the same man for 12 years, dating for over 20. Good luck.

Hello, two under two. I have 4 under 5. I have 2 sets of twins; my older twins were 3 when the younger twins were born. It's great that you have lots of family; we get no help from family. We are fortunate to be able to pay for help. But built-in playmates is great. Getting all on the same schedule when that's possible is good. Treat yourself nicely. Make a point to always reassure your children that you love all equally. My lap has room for all my children. the older ones help with the younger ones. Just know that you can do it, take lots of deep breaths and prioritize. don't sweat the small stuff. I get so much lover and laughs that I beam constantly. Do all you can to be organized so that each day will be as easy as possible. Never let your kids think that you find it overwhelming. Schedule times for each parent to have one on one time with each child. Schedule special times for both kids. Have fun and you will be just fine.

I have 2 sons, who are 17 months apart. I'm not going to lie, it was a little tough at first, but I had an advantage...I never had to deal with a jealous older sibling (like you hear about when they're 2 and 3 years apart), my older one really just didn't pay the baby much attention at all. It wasn't until they got a little older that they started fussing at each other. They're 5 and almost 4 now...and they can be at each others throats and also the best friends ever! I love having mine so close, my only advice is just be happy and enjoy every moment because it goes fast!

My first two were this close in age. My oldest is graduating this weekend. From my experience, the older could help with homework, be in the same school to help show the younger one around and they could just talk "shop". My son said it was going to be weird not having his sister around next year. Even though they would fight, they always took care of each other. They have times that only they could share at school, so it was nice to be able to hear them talking about what happened and they compared notes. Enjoy and include the older one when playing and taking care of the younger one. They might not remember, but you will. They grow up so fast, so I'm glad they were close in age. I have kids that will graduate every two years apart (a total of three kiddos within 2 years of each other).

Because they are so close in age they will be better playmates for each other. My kids are 4 yrs apart (2 and 6), it was hard because my son did not want to give up his role as number one but your children will be better at sharing because it will just be how it is. My brother and I were 2 years apart and we were very close growing up (still are). I always had someone close to my age to play with even if my friends weren't around.

You'll do great!

My middle child, my first son was 17 months old when my infant son was born. That was 6 months ago and things have gone fairly well. My biggest concerns more involved the 17 month old than the infant. I was afraid that he wouldn't be accepting of the baby, but he immediately loved his baby and the things involving him. I won't lie and say that there are times when both of them want you at the same exact moment, or that there aren't nights here or there when both of them are getting you up, but there is nothing that can't be handled.

I know what you mean by those who are negative. Having a 5 year old, a nearly 2 year old and a 6 month old, I still have busy bodies who toss out that I sure have my hands full. I have even had a couple of rude strangers suggest I get a tv, but you know what- they are rude, insincitive and obviously they can't handle something like that. Who cares? You can do it, will do it and it is the most amazing thing to see the bonds develop, especially between the two little ones. They benefit and it is something they will have for life!!

Congrats!

My kids are 21 months apart and that is only because it took us a while to get preggo the second time around. We wanted our kids to be close in age and we didnt care what anybody thought about it. Now they are the best of friends! They love each other more than I ever imagined. You are blessed to have these kids close together. The first year was the hardest for me because my youngest didn't sleep through the night until he was 17 months. I did not have very much help from my family and I made it! You will make it too. Congrats and God bless!

Congratulations! I was in a similar situation - mine are 22 months apart. It is extremely difficult in the beginning - just no way around it. My second happened to be semi high maintenance so it probably more of a challenge than a "normal" baby, but nevertheless, it is hard. HOWEVER, it does get better! And, then, pretty soon, it's amazing and you're so glad you did it. My kids are 2-1/2 and 9 mos and they are so precious together. They adore each other and have started to "play" together. I'm sure you'll have other posts froms moms with older kids to tell you how great it is that they have each other when they're older. My L&D nurse told me that the first year will be unbelievably hard, but then, all of a sudden, you'll find that they entertain each other and you have all kinds of free time.

So, hang in there during the tough times - just know that it will be difficult. Be sure and take advantage of your hubby and anyone else you can! If you're a SAHM, see if you can have your older child go to a MOPS or something like that to give yourself some undivided time with the baby. And, try to schedule some time with your older one when hubby's home. That was the hardest part for me - not being able to spend enough quality time with my older one. I missed that so much - broke my heart. But, on the positive side, dad had to take a moreactive role with her and that's made them both better all around. Good luck - you're so blessed!!

My kiddos are 14 months apart and I wouldn't have it any other way! The easy part is when yor new baby is still a baby, when he/she turn 1 and is mobile and more independant is the tricky part! Going anywhere by yourself gets harder because they are both walking. That was the most difficult thing for me. Now my kids are 3 and 4 and they always have someone to play with, but also someone to argue with. My advice is to start the "sharing is caring" business early and never back down on your decisions because they will run all over you if you give an inch! They tag team you, so you always have to be firm and stick to whatever rules you make. Right now my kids are the best of freinds and I hope it stays that way, I have a girl and a boy so they don't have to feel like they are compete to be the better boy/girl because I make sure I tell them how special they are, and that they are the best boy/girl in the whole world and their face lights up. Anyways, enough about them, I hope any of this helps you. And good luck!

Hi Nicole! My first two children were 20 months apart, then we waited a while to have our third. Then...SURPRISE!!! Our third and fourth are going to be 19 months apart (due in 4 weeks). Yes, your hands will be full, but being so close together, they will play well. I am excited for you!!! Don't worry about all of the negative comments. With friends and family to help you out, you'll be just fine! Just remember...it's okay to ask for help! God has truly blessed you! He knows you can handle 2 young ones!!

N.,

If it makes you feel any better - I have a daughter turning 6 in July and boy triplets turning 1 in two weeks. I also work full time and my DH is a fire fighter who also works EMS - so he's gone about 100 hours/week (overnight every 3rd night). Life is crazy but we've made it work. You can do it....... ;)

T.

Some good reasons of having your children close in age are:
You are still in baby mode
You are still use to changing diapers.
All of your baby clothes and toys are still in code and style.
The older one won't remember life without the younger one.
Your older one doesn't have tiny little toys that the younger one can't play with.
You and your husband can have a life when they are grown.
My boys are almost exactly 2 years apart and it is hard at times but I wouldn't change it for anything.
Good luck!

My first 2 were about that age difference. It's great, because even though they are a year & 1/2 apart, it timed out that they are only a year behind each other in pre-school. Now they play really well together (although that takes work to get them there...can't let them get away with mistreating each other). Plus now that I also have a 3rd,(he is 6 mo & about 2years apart from #2), they love on him like crazy. I will say however that I made things alot easier by wearing my babies. If you don't know what that is, check out this website:
http://www.theslingstation.com/
This site carries just about all kinds and tells of the benefits of wearing a child. Newborns are the best, because it makes them feels soo secure...almost like being back in the womb. I used them for all of my kids--but soon after staining my first 2, I decided to start making them...so if you decide you don't want to pay for the ones online, I can make you one with material you choose & show you how to use them. The one I like best and that I make is kind of like the Maya Wrap, but a little different. I like it because it's adjustable and one of the few that you can truly go "hands free" with & putting it on is quick & easy. The Mobys are good too, but I don't make those...but I do know a Moby rep in the area, so you can at least save on shipping. With the slings, you can go to the store and only have to put one child in the cart--no heavy carrier to lug around! Malls are a breeze, I would take my fold up umbrella stoller for the older child and wear my baby. Only draw back is if I wanted to try things on...but I soon learned it was worth it to just buy the clothes, try them on at home and return anything I didn't like.

Good luck and email me if you need that sling!

I have a brother and sister that are 2 days short of a year apart. My sister was born 7/7/92 and my brother was born 7/5/93. They are so close now, its like they are twins. I wish I had that growing up. My husband and I have a 20 month old and are thinking of trying for another one soon, although are kids will be more than 2 years apart, I think its great. I am 12 and 13 years old than them and I because I had to babysit a lot it was much easier, they liked the same things and could play together. Good luck, just remember everything always works its self out!!

My two kids are only 12 months and 3 weeks apart! I was scared at first, but thanks to having extra help from my mother, it was totally fine, and I really love seeing my two kids play together now--they will always have each other! It will be great, don't worry!

I had two 14 1/2 months apart and a third one that came along two years later, so you will be (busy) ha, but fun also. Seemed like about the time I wanted to feed the baby, my one year old would be putting something in her mouth or I'd need to see what she was into. Good that you have help, just a break now and then makes it where you won't get overwhelmed. Although it will be a busy time, I think you will enjoy them and they will have fun with each other when old enough to play.

Nicole,

Let me first offer a response to those who have negative comments. When they comment negatively say "Children are a blessing from God, I'm so excited to be so blessed". This will either leave their mouths open or stump them.

My oldest two are 2 years and 10 days apart and I love it (I have 3 girls: 2, 5,7). I love to see them interact. My baby is such a delight to see her trying to keep up with her sisters. Her speech is amazing. I think it comes with trying to stay afloat with big sisters. They will be close in age; however, they will be close to each other and share a bond that is indescribable. I say CONGRATULATIONS AND GOD BLESS YOU AND THE FAMILY. You'll be tired some days, but other days you'll look at them and just smile with a heart full of love. Love and hug them a lot, they grow so fast and do so many funny memorable things. I sing a special song to them each night "Yes Jesus Loves Me" and to my amazement one evening my 2 year old (was 19 months at the time)starting singing the song, to the right tune no less. My sister and I looked up and started smiling. I didn't even know she knew it. I tell you I was so proud, you could probably see my smile from here to eternity. You didn't say if you were planning to nurse or not,but I nursed each of mine for a minimum of 18 months and enjoyed the bonding that came with it. So whenever someone makes you feel sad, just remember that you'll have 2 special people(or more) to mold, hold,love and laugh with for a life time and nothing in this world could replace that joy. Enjoy your babies. I say the more the merrier. God bless you, your husband and your little darlings. Remember they won't be little always and as they get bigger it gets easier, trust me..been there, still there and loving every minute of it.

Also, my brother is 11 months older than me and we are so close and had such fun growing up and getting into trouble. We still have a good time and laugh about the old times.

N.,

It will be so much fun for you my best friend had two very close together like that the oldest was like 6 mos when she found out she wa going to have another one. I will say at first it might of been hard on her but as they grow they became the best of friends since they are close in age I think it will be great and fun all newborns are hard no matter what the age of the first one I have a 14 year old and 9 yr old and just had another one who is almost 7 mos and it was hard still with my nine yr old.. So I feel no matter what the age it can be alittle difficult but you will get through the older my youngest gets the easier it is because now she laughs and plays with the older ones and they love it so much you will get through this I would say the first three months will be the hardest but it goes by so very fast so just enjoy them both and before you know they are going to high school I look back and say where has the time gone it goes way to fast... At least they will be close in age and have each other to play with... Good Luck.....

When you have 2 children under 2 you don't have a lot of time to ponder what others might think. Plus, you have a built in cheerleader at home to cheer the baby on when he reaches a milestone: big brother.

my motto: Do the next thing.

My hubby also took off from work. So my hubby was totally devoted to my first born while I cared for my second child. It made for an easy transition.
Enjoy it...my kiddo's are 12 and 9 now. Time flies.

My 2 are about 2 1/2 year apart. The hardest part for me was that when my second was born, by 1st decided to quit napping for a while. (He picked it back up later for a few months). Anyway, I nearly had some serious emotional breakdowns cause I never got to sleep - up alot at night with the newborn and awake all day hopeing that I could manage to keep my nearly 3 year old from putting glue in the carpet, lotioning the house and doing numerous other mischievious things. I never got to nap. YOU however, will be able to nap, because your oldest is most likely too young to stop napping. So, although there may be good things about having an older child when the next one comes, keep in mind that the one thing you will need most when #2 is born you will most likely get a little more of, because the first is younger - SLEEP! And don't be afraid to call on a friend to help if you need it.

OMG! You will love having two that close! I have two boys 19 months apart (now 7 and 8) and they are best friends. I just had another boy (now 7 weeks) and wish I could have another one so he would have a buddy to hang with all the time. They love each other so much and it is wonderful. Early on it was difficult, but those times are so short and last just a little while. My brother was just 13 months younger than me and we grew up the same way. I don't have memories before he was in them. It is a unique relationship and one your kids will be blessed to have!

N.,

I have 2 children that are 14 months apart. Yes, it was/is difficult (they are 3 and 4 now) but it is well worth it. They will be very close. They can play with toys from the same age group after the younger gets out of infant toys. They might be learning to do things together and you'll be getting it done easier, like potty training. One sees the other doing it and wants to learn too. They can share clothes. Don't worry about those negative comments you get. Good luck to you!

I am in the same boat N.. I will have a 21 month old and a newborn in 8 months and Im pretty terrified, so I thank you for asking this so I can read your responses.

Hi N., I had my boys 23 months apart. I had Jesse exactly 2 weeks before Jake turned 2. I understand the negative remarks, belive me I heard enough of them from my mother in law. You are blessed, just remember that every time you hear a negitive remark. You will be tired and there will be days that you will want to yank out your hair in frustration, but it is all worth it. Some experts say that the first time your children play together is when the youngest is 2 1/2 yrs. It's not true. When your youngest starts to crawl and cruise around, your heart will melt when your two kids play with eachother. there is no sweeter reward than seeing your children play and interact together. Good luck and God Bless! :)

Hi N.. I just want to say congratulations on your second. I have 3 yr old triplets and although it is not always easy to have this many kids this close together, it is the best feeling in the world. They've always got a built in playgroup and as they've gotten older, they are always willing to help out around the house or with each other. You will never have a dull moment but your life with be all the more blessed because of your children. They will be each other's best friend. My only suggestion for #2 would be to try and get him/her on a very close schedule to #1. Your life will be a lot smoother that way. I know you'll do just fine.

I have 2 that are close, 22 mo apart. I will tell you that it has been fun, I mean that. My son (older) has thuroughly enjoyed HIS sister. He is very protective of her around other kids. Let me give you some advice that I think helped us to not have the jealousy. It started in the Hospital. If you are holding baby and your older son wants to sit with you, let him. He needs to bond too and not be pushed aside. Also the same for feeding baby. Try to spend special time with your older son so he does not feel like he is missing his mommy. We also had the 2 sharing a room starting when she was 6-8 weeks old, we did this until she was a year old, then we made a big deal of him getting his new Thomas room. My two play together, there is a little fighting due to her wanting to play with his toys, but for the most part they get along great. Let him get things for the new baby, like if you need a blanket or diaper, he will feel like a big helper, even though he is too little to change a diaper or feed baby. Also once baby is a little older, let him hold baby while sitting down, my son wanted to hold his sister so bad that he got mad at me when I needed to take her from him. I hope this helps, and remember that they will be close, not only in age but friends too.

Congratulations on your two blessings! We have a 5 month old and already want to try for baby number 2. Some unexpected health issues will prevent that from happening. We wanted our children super close together, but the Lord has a different plan. God has the perfect plan for your family and it will all work out! Enjoy!

I am one of 7 children, and my brother and sister
both just younger then me, are 10 months apart. We
were not weathly but had so much love during our
childhoods and to me that is what matters. I love
children and hope for you the very best. Love them
for as long as God lets you have them !

Well, N., I will be in the same position in December. I really do not understand what it is about pregnancy and child rearing that makes people think they need to give their advice and horror storis! Really, it is amazing how many unwanted comments you get! Would you say to a cancer patient, "Oh my gosh, that chemo is really going to be awful...my aunt lost all of her hair."

ANyway, I think we are both VERY lucky to be able to give our first borns a sibling so close to their age. I never had that growing up, but my friends and family who do have a sibling within a year or two of age are SOOOO very close to to them. It is hard to have a newborn no matter what your circumstance. It is something we all just have to adjust to and do our best, and you will! My philosophy is that if you don't know any differently, these big life changes just become normal. There are drawbacks to trying to care for older kids with a newborn too...they need to be driven places, need more focused attention, etc.

You have a great support system, so it is ideal. You will probably get to spend some one-on-one time with both of your kids since you have help from family. These next few "baby years" will FLY by...and then we will both be missing that precious time. Fortunately, there will be more special times to come, and our kids will always have a companion to share them.

Congratulations and good luck!

N.,

Sorry this is late. I just saw your post. My sister and I are 16 months apart and have been the closest growing up. She is older and always watched out for me. It will only be tough when they're small. For some encouragement, watch "Jon & Kate plus 8" on TLC. I sometimes think "my goodness, how do they do it?" It will inspire you that you can do it with two little ones.