R.
I don't know if your spouse is like mine - but mine always wanted to be sure things were "in place." Like before we got married, children, house etc. What we have learned after 13 years of marraige - is that you are never ready - and you deal with whatever comes along - so try to convince him to be more spontaneous??? My view - I had 2 miscarraiges after my first child - thus my oldest two ended up 4 years apart. Not what I particulary wanted - but we deal with it. I know several people who have had issues trying to conceive - I wouldn't wait - tell him he has 9 months to get used to it - and what is the likelihood of getting pregant immediately? I know it is frustrating - I am sure his reasons are sincere (in his own mind) but maybe if you can compromise and set a definite date to 'start trying' - that will put you both at ease. By the way - we then tried sooner for the third (having had previous issues) and I was pregnant within 30 days!!!!!! Who knows how things go???
Good Luck to you -
R.