Week Day Schedule with Kinder and Infant

I would let her play after school. Snack (because she's probably hungry), then play. Homework can wait. Most people need a break after school before they can get started on homework. Hopefully she doesn't have too much homework. My son is in kindergarten, and the only time he had homework was when he refused to do it at school (he's really still adjusting). Both times it only took 5 to 10 minutes to complete.

Seriously, let her play outside on days that she can. They won't last too much longer, so take advantage of this time.

I work full-time, but I have Fridays off. My boys go to daycare afterschool where they have a snack and then play - outside when possible. When my husband or I pick them up, we still let them play for a bit while we prep dinner. Once we eat we do any homework there is, maybe watch a little bit of tv and do baths, read books and get ready for bed. On the weekends I do try to catch up on housework a bit, but I try to spend that time with the kids. My house will never pass inspection (it's cluttered), but the bathroom is clean, the dishes are done and we all have clean clothes to wear. I'm satisfied, for the most part.

When you do decide to go back to work, you might have to pick and choose what's most important to you. Right now, spending time with my kids is usually more important. Once in awhile I need to do the deeper cleaning. Those are the times they spend the afternoon with Grandma and Grandpa or they get the treat of watching a movie while I do my best to work fast. You make it work! Also, if you're at work all week and they're at school all week, there isn't quite as much to clean up :-)

Cross that bridge when you come to it. For now, try to just relax a bit. This is an adjustment for both of you, but soon you'll find a new routine.

You've gotten a lot of great replies. I'll try to make this brief.

1. Make weekly dates with your daughter for 1:1 without baby. 1 hour will do. Go get ice cream, go to the park, the library, nails done, whatever fits into your budget. We call it "mommy dates" at my house. Make sure you let her know this is your special time together. All kids need 1:1 time but since she has been an only child for so long. Personally, I'd even have parents dates with her - when someone else can car for the baby.

2. I've been a stay home mom, a working part time mom, working from home, working full time. I've tried it all LOL. I work a lot of hours but this is the first time I've really had help and it's made a HUGE difference. I have a bi-weekly cleaning service. That's nice but for me it's the day to day stuff that's hard. So I now have an after school nanny that is responsible for starting dinner, doing dishes, putting away the kids clothes and taking the kids to their after school activities. Since you'll be teaching and getting off around the time your daughter does, this may not make sense. Even still you could have a teen or college student come in for a couple hours a few days a week to put away laundry, do the grocery shopping, straighten up or even cook a few meals.

Picking out clothes for the week, packing lunches for most of the week, etc on Sunday's also very helpful.

I agree with you that some outside playtime comes before homework when you live in the northeast and it gets dark early in winter.

I would suggest 1) feeding the baby at 3:30 everyday so she's not as needing right when your older one gets home and 2) planning a break on your housework/dinner prep from 4-4:30 every day. Meet your daughter at the bus stop and go for a walk or play in the back yard so she gets some time with you right after school (baby in a front pack while you walk/play).

Then dinner and she can do any homework while you clean up dinner.

I also want to ask when your DH gets home (I'm assuming you aren't a single mom). If my assumption is right, then please hand off the baby and sit and read to your daughter one-on-one every night. Your baby gets you all to herself all day long now. You should feel no guilt in handing the baby off to DH for an hour every evening.

As for balancing work and home, you'll realign your priorities. For me, cleaning my house is my lowest priority. So I hire someone to do that so I can spend more time with my kids. And work that I bring home is taken care of after the kids go to bed.

ETA: I just want to comment on your guilt about friendships. Now that your daughter is on school, she's with peers all day. When she gets home, she needs her momma. And that's ok. Find a wsy to give her some mommy time,

Okay, deep breath, you are home ALL DAY. When my oldest was in K he only went for three and a half hours, and I had a 3 year old and newborn at home. Life was crazy, as the 3 year old went to preschool three mornings a week as well. But somehow I managed to keep things relatively clean and under control, most of the time :-)
During the day, focus on housework and getting dinner prepped. With a baby you will work in spurts of course (mine were on the boob a lot LOL!) If your family likes casseroles, soups, stews, crockpot meals, etc. those are so easy to make during the day and then just heat up or stick in the oven at dinnertime. Also dinnertime IS quality time with your daughter! You don't need to go outside and play to spend time with her, have her help you with the table, dishes, cleanup, serving, whatever. If she balks let her know she can go play and you will call her when dinner is ready.
For homework, in K I assume it's mostly you reading to her every day, practicing sight words and maybe a simple math worksheet? I always read to my kids at bedtime, and when they were in K/1st grade homework was often done at the dinner table, as we finished eating. It was easy because we were already sitting down and relaxed anyway. I don't know if that would work for you but it worked for us.
A., I mean this in the kindest possible way. Based on your posts your daughter seems VERY needy. I don't know if this is just her personality or if it's because for five years you have given her all of your attention and never forced her to wait, or to entertain herself for a while. Independence is a VERY important skill for her to develop, and if she's just now learning with a new baby in the house it's going to be hard, of course, and she will resent the baby, thinking somehow it's the baby's fault. Keep working with her, and spend more time with her as a MOTHER (doing things around the house that need to be done anyway) not a playmate and it will get easier. I'm not saying you should never play with her, but don't feel guilty that playing isn't something you have a lot of time for either.

alyssa should NOT have a lot of homework in kindergarten. i'd focus more on giving her a little mommy-and-me time when she gets home from school. try to get the baby to nap then, but don't freak out if she won't. baby can hang out on a blanket nearby while you and alyssa begin a new sweet after-school routine which might involve tea or a walk with baby in the stroller or just quiet chat.
get to know your crock pot. throw the ingredients in right after alyssa leaves for school, and you don't have to think about dinner any more.
after alyssa has had some decompress time she can work on her homework while you finish dinner preparations. you don't have to sit right there with her hovering- she can and should work independently while you bustle around, available to her but allowing her to take ownership of her own work.
i don't remember a specific 'routine' when my kids were this age (and their split was almost exactly like yours.) i was working like a galley slave, and my kids didn't have the luxury of anyone angsting over whether or not they could entertain themselves, or who was getting more attention. while i got dinner ready they played in the kitchen with me, or their rooms, and i wore the baby, or put him in seat or on a blanket, and the older one played out in the yard, or <gasp> watched tv, and did his homework with me or his dad checking in as needed. we just went with it.
if you go back to work full-time you WON'T have much time beyond mundane routine tasks. you just do it, and you make it work. surely you have enough on your plate right now without launching into advance anxiety about how next year MIGHT look.
khairete
S.

You make up a schedule of daily tasks ad break them down to morning and afternoon. Certain days you clean certain rooms and do laundry. Nap for baby is scheduled into the routine. If you don't take a nap with baby use that time to prep for dinner.

Time management is going to be your friend.

the other S.

Don't do homework first. Spend your family time. Alyssa has had 8 hours of school. She needs a break and seriously, if it's more than working on her sight words and an occasional work sheet her teacher has serious issues.

Kindergartners don't need homework. Going over sight words or something like that is okay but daily homework just to be sending something home? That's so wrong.

Kids don't need homework. They need time to be a kid, time to run and play and breath. When she comes home have something for her to eat then for goodness sake. Go to the park, go outside and play, watch TV with her by your side in a snuggle, spend some time with her. After dinner there should be time if her teacher really does send useless homework with her.

I seriously think some people just give busy work so they can appear to be a good teacher. If a teacher needs to give serious homework that takes very much time then something is wrong.

When my older son was in kindergarten a school day looked like this: I worked at my part time job in the morning from 9:00 to 12.. In the afternoon I took my younger son out for a bit after lunch (from 1:00 to 3:00pm), then did my housework and prepped supper from 3:00 to 4:00pm. We would walk over to the school to meet my son when school ended at 4:00pm. If my younger son was still taking naps I put him in the stroller so he could sleep. We stayed at the playground until 5:00pm while my son played with his school friends and I visited with the school moms. Then we walked home and I put the kids in front of the tv while I finished making supper. After supper we often had an activity or went for a walk etc. Then home for baths and homework. In kindergarten homework was just reading and maybe sight words, so we did it right at bedtime.

I wouldn't work full time with your kids this young unless you absolutely have to. To me it was so worth cutting expenses so that I could be at home. A lot of teachers job share here so they don't have to work full days.

Let me say this about "homework " in Kinder. Do not treat it so much as homework as "show me what you were learning today in kindergarten".. This attitude that children should not have homework cracks me up. If your child came home with no homework and you asked them, what did you learn today at school? MOST of them would say, "I do not remember" or would not be able to communicate it with you.

Through this "Home work", you are going to see for yourself, what they are working on and learning. You are a partner in your child's education. You are 50% responsible for their schooling.You reinforce what the teacher is doing all day and showing your child, you are VERY interested in their educations. And let this "Home work" be her honest work. You do not need to do the homework or even correct it. Instead you encourage her to do "her" best and help her when she asks.

I agree, when she gets home, give her a snack let her play outside for half hour or an hour and then come inside while you make dinner, let her work on homework.

See if this will work for all of you.

I used to wear our daughter in a carrier on my back when she was an infant. I could rake leaves, cook, do laundry. She loved it.

I used to plan a week of meals so I knew what we would be eating and have all of the ingredients.

I made extra so that I had extras in the freezer in case dinner was running late, or I was too tired to start from scratch.

Also dinner does not always have to be hot or warm. sandwiches, were considered a treat for dinner in our home.

Usually Thursday nights were "leftover buffet night". I would warm up all of the left overs from the week and we would eat a little of this or that.

And cereal was also available if anyone, including me,if we could not face what had been prepared.