Toddler Hitting Her Head on the Floor :(

Have you considered that she might have a headache, this could be caused from food allergies, such as chocolate or colored cereals or other additives in food.

Hi there,
My son used to sit under the piano and bang his head backwards on it. It's completely normal, and often is out of frustration. I agree with the posts about not giving it attention while it's happening, but keep an eye out for what seems to trigger it, and then you can catch it before it happens, and give the attention then, teaching her how to communicate and giving extra attention before the fact. Good luck. I can tell you that "this too shall pass."

Hi,
I have this issue regarding some of my students in my classroom, what we have done was to make a key ring with index cards that show pictures of other things/solutions they can do when they are mad. For example: when they are mad they can talk to mom, sit quietly, do a puzzle, do something that calms them down, listens to music. It usually shows about five other choices that they can learn to use so they have outlets when they are upset.... hope this helps...-K.

My daughter is 22mo old. She too has done the head banging on the floor. I'd say it started about 18mo old, she would mainly do it when she was mad, and she would have slight bruises from this. I too felt terrible, but after a while I said "no no" and she came to realize that it does hurt and it is a "no no" to bang her head......... she is now 22mo old and really doesnt do it anymore. Sometimes I think she is gonna when she gets mad, but then she doesnt!!
This shall pass..... My husband kept reminding me my son did this too, it passed and he is fine!!
Best of Luck

I did this at that age, and my son does it now as a 2.5 yr old. The doctor says to ignore it and leave your babe be, they will stop when they don't get the attention!

I know you have had similiar responses, so I'll keep it short.

Good luck!!!

This is hard and goes against every mama bones in our body that tells us to comfort, but what I had to do for my son when he went through this and it worked extremely quickly for him at least was to completely ignore it. He would bang his head then look at me for a reaction so I stopped giving him one. He would normally hit it once then look at me, when I didn't react he would do it a second time and then start crying (here is the hardest part) I would not cuddle him but I would tell him "oh no, it hurts doesn't it, that is what happens when you bang your head on the floor." I might give him one quick hug but that was it. When he realized it wasn't getting his desired effect he stopped pretty quickly (thankfully!).

Hi C. -

If you google this there are several kids who do "head banging" it can be to comfort themselves or to get attention. I know it's hard but don't worry too much it's something they grow out of. Seeing your daughter is 20 months old - when she starts I would ask her if she wants to sit with you or tell her to come and sit with you. Ask her what she wants or why she is mad. If she continues I would put her somewhere safe like her crib or pack n' play so that she doesn't hurt her head. She may just be looking for attention so try giving her more attention and see if the behavior lessens. I would also contact your pedi for other ideas.

Hello, my now 2 year old did this when he was somwhere around 17-20 months. I was very worried and felt that it was a red flag for a bigger issue. My husband completely calmed me down when he pointed out that he was doing it when he's frustrated...at the time, his talking was at a minimum and he couldn't tell us what he needed. We started to watch for these moments and see what was bothering him, then we would gently pick him up and help him put words to the situation. I would try to have him repeat things back...if his car went under the couch, I'd have him try to reapeat, "get ball" and when he would attempt it, I would say, "oh, you want mommy to help you get your ball, it's under the couch". He would shake his head up and down and say, "yes, yes." After several weeks, not only did the head hitting become a rare occasion, but his communication skills began to soar. He realized that using his words would help him to get what he wanted/needed. He is two now, and I haven't seen this for months now and he talks up a storm. Give it a try, you may see the same results as us. It also never hurts to pass the situation by your pediatrician. Good luck!

Hi C.!

Not sure what kind of responses you are getting but my 2 year old does the same thing and she walks around with goose eggs...she wants to be loved to but she is doing it because she is not getting her way or she is mad. I pick her up and put her somewhere soft(carpet) so if she does it again maybe it will cushion her but I don't snuggle her....I feel sad but it frustrates me that she does it! Doesn't she realize she is hurting herself! We just want to a 2 year checkup today and I told the Dr what I do and he said that was the right thing. So I hope this helps! Keep in touch and let me know how it goes!

K.

Hi C..........what an hard thing for you to have to observe. First thought that came to mind was put a helmet on her. She most likely will hate it but it will be for her protection. You may even be able to reason with her saying:
" If you keep hitting your head you will have to wear this helmet " Let her gently know that you have made a firm decision on this and that's that.
Hope this or other suggestions work for you.
Blessing to you C., P.

If she is getting mad and you sense she's about to do it, just put her somewhere safe, like her crib, and walk away. She gets positive attention from you for hurting herself - she does it because she is getting a reward from it. Give her the positive attention for using words or whatever, not for banging her head. Also, teach/show her other things she can do when frustrated - hitting a pillow or yelling or whatever is safer and more appropriate.

Hi C.,
Just wanted to let you know that I have a 5 year old son who is completely well adjusted with no abnormal behavior issues that used to bang his head on the floor around the same age as yours. It was awful to experience because he would get bumps on his head from doing it. As soon as I stopped trying to intervene and just ignored his head banging it stopped within a few days.
There is nothing wrong with your daughter as this can be typical behavior for a toddler.
Good luck!!!!
PS: I do not think you need professional help-the way you responded is the way most mothers would respond when their child is hurt. It goes against what we feel to ignore our children, but it really will work in this case.

Hi Crhistine - I can't help you with the psychological reasons for your child's behaviour, but I sure can see trouble brewing in the behavior department.

My suggestion is professional help for you both - immediately.

Because what you are setting up with YOUR behavior is a very bad precedent... She hurts herself on purpose, and you kiss and love her. You are rewarding her behavior.

Anyway, I might suggest that in the meantime, since she is small, when she starts to do this, put her somewhere safe - where she can't injure herself. Maybe even create a space someplace with a little mattress there - put her on it when this starts.

If it continues when she's bigger, try putting a pillow under her head to prevent injury.

Hi,
Thank you for your post! You don't know how often I've asked myself what I can do to reverse my son's habits - he is now 17 months and does the same thing. He's been at it for a time. I don't know what to tell you though. We often tell his to stand up to teach him this is not how he should act if upset, but otherwise I don't know what to do when he starts except leave whatever I'm doing to attend to him.

I can tell you though, if she hits her head hard, immediately pick cold water on her head and put salt on it to avoid swelling. This really does works for all bumps.

I'll be watching for your responses.

Hello-

My son did the same thing and I had the same worries as you. I was worried, sad, etc. I think it was a frustration thing as well. I asked the Dr. and he said "he's a headbanger" and that was it. He assured me it was not abnormal in most cases (but of course watch him for doing real harm) and that he would grow out of it. He did and never did it again. I would try to ignore it as much as possible and change his attention to something else quick. Hang in there, she will learn to express herself in other ways.

Donna

My Son started head banging at 5 months old and finally stopped around 2 1/2. It is very common and it is usually due to the child being frustrated and not being able to communucate. Yes, ignore the behavior and do not draw attention to it when it happens. My son used to go to playgroups with, like, 4 bruises on his forhead and I always had to defend his head banging to the other mothers who were appauled that he would do such a thing to him self. Just keep in mind that it is a phase and she will grow out of it. Be patient and ignore the behavior and it will pass...good luck...

The Happiest Toddler on the Block by Harvey Karp saved my sanity when my daughter was this age. He talks about how you have a "little caveman" on your hands, and how to communicate with her so that she feels understood. It's well worth the read!

I have to agree with Erin and Carol. Ignoring is the best way to squash it immediately (or almost) if she is seeking attention. Kids often don't realize the importance between positive and negative reinforcement - nor do they care! They just want attention - no matter how much you already provide it!!! It also sounds as though she is doing this out of frustration if she's doing it more when she is mad...so I also agree with the communication factor. Kids that young often have soooo many needs and thoughts, but don't yet have a way to express them fully, so sometimes they act out in attempts to do that. Please keep us posted! I know it's super hard to ignore the behavior when her safety is at risk, but I wouldn't use any words (comforting or otherwise) - no verbal communication while it's happening. In fact, even try to avert your eye contact. I know it's hard, but I think if she truly is aware that you are paying attention, or giving her attention for it, she'll continue.

If none of these suggestions work, I'd speak with your pediatrician and/or neurologist to be sure nothing bigger is going on. Sounds as though it's purely frustration and/or attention seeking by your description though.

Hi. I have a simple solution to this problem but I don't know if you will want to hear it. My sister used to do this when she was very little and my mother finally asked our pediatrician and his answer was this. When she goes to do it again get a large glass of water and throw it on her. My mother was aghast but because she did not know what else to do she did it. My sister never did it again and was shocked that my mom did it but it worked.