Sleepless Child

My daughter is going through the same thing right now. I leave a sippy cup of water with her at night. If I tell her how important it is that she stays in bed all night before she goes to bed, then sometimes she does. I might try the bed on the floor idea.

I went through this with 2 of my 5 kiddos around the 3-4 year old age. I know you said yours has had this since birth but maybe what I did will help you.
I am all about children learning to sleep on their own, all night long, in their room. HOWEVER a mama has got to sleep.

So we bent the rules a little from the normative estate knowing we would be working toward being back their.

For one child I had a chair thing that unfolded into a bed- not the kiddy kind but one that walmart sells every now and then that a child up to about age 10 could easily fit on.
For another child I did an extra crib mattress that I slipped out from under my bed.

The rule was that you had to go to sleep in your own bed and remain there. Before I went to bed at night I would make up the little bed on the floor beside my bed somewhere (on my side)

then if the child woke in the middle of the night and couldnt get back to sleep she could come into our room- WITH OUT WAKING ME UP- and lay down on the little bed on the floor.
She (both girls) could not get in my bed, we did not hold hands, this is bedtime and we sleep- serious business=-)

The encouragement was toward her staying all night in her own bed and every evening we encouraged her to do so. She was not in trouble or made fun of in the morning if she came into our room, we normally would say something like "Well thats okay but tonight try to stay in your bed okay"

I believe one daughter did this on and off for about 4 months and the otherone was 2 or 3.

Once they consitantly were staying in their own bed the rules changed back to the normative of staying all night in your own bed. And the little bed on the floor option was removed.

I do not know what it is with this particular age but it seems as though most children go through this- whatever it is.

And so that is what we did because a mama with no sleep is not a very pleasent mama and that became a top priority.

I believe both girls came in normally around 2 or 3 in the morning and most the time they followed the rules of crawling into the little bed without waking me (although I am a light sleep and was aware of the fact that they were now in my room). All in all it solved the problem at hand and then the need to do it just disapeared it was the best plan we came up with for this problem- hope that helps!...M.

Hi, T.. She sounds like my first born. I had to learn to train her to sleep. It's tough love, but after a week or so she'll be sleeping through the night in her own bed, and you'll bet getting your needed sleep!

Before bed, tell her that she has had her water, has pottied, said her prayers, etc. (Whatever the night time ritual is). Tell her that she cannot get out of bed till morning, and that she's a big girl that is ready to sleep through the night.

Of course she's going to wake up. Go in, calmly place her sheets back around her, pat her for a second and go out. Do not pick her up. She'll cry, scream, whatever it takes to get her way. Go out, close the door, and come back in 3 minutes. Repeat the same thing. Stay calm, don't cajole, just tell her she's going back to sleep. Go out, stay 5 minutes. Repeat until she finally passes out, each time staying out longer. Usually this goes on for about 45 minutes.

If she wakens later in the night, repeat. Do not pick her up no matter what, or you are starting over. It could take as little as 2 nights to train her.

Dr. Leila Daughtry-Denmark, who turned 110 this past Saturday, was our beloved pediatrician. She retired at 103, and taught me many common sense parenting skills that I was lacking the common sense to figure out on my own, like training a child to sleep, and to eat healthy. There's a book called, Dr. Denmark Said It, by Madia Bowman, that recounts the wisdom that Dr. Denmark passed on to her clients. I give it to new moms as a shower gift. You may find it on Amazon.com, or locally here in Cumming. You can also email the author for a copy at ____@____.com that helped!
T. M

My daughter was one of those kids that never needed sleep also , even as an infant she never took naps. Try putting a cup with a straw in her room, and if she needs a drink of water then she can get it her self instead of waking up mom. or you can take the drink away just put her back to bed. it will take time but you have to be consistant. We had a chart on my daughters door where if she stayed in bed all night like a big girl she would get a sticker on her chart and she loved putting the sticker on at the end of the week she got soemthing special depending on how many stickers she got( honestly the sticker was such a thrill that was enough for my daughter). Remind her when she goes to bed that she will get her sticker if she stays in bed like a good girl. And put a gate on her door if you dont have one already. we found a tall one at walmart its 32 inchs tall . So that if she does get up she cant come out of her room, theres all kinds of stuff they can get into if there's not a gate.If she does get up and not go back to bed on her own , get up put her back to bed , and you go back to bed. no back rubbing , no rocking, nothing. If she wants a drink she can have her water cup. Pretty soon there isnt anything to get up for and every reason to sleep.

I have four children and my second child is now 4 years old. She would get up through the night since birth also. She also was so grumpy when she woke up, HAD to have a 3 hour nap every day even at 4 years old and got strep throat about 2 times a year. I remembered reading a study in college about sleep apenea in children being misdiagnosed as ADHD. When I went to our ped I asked him about the topic and he referred me to an ENT. I went to see the ENT when my child was not sick and her tonsils were +4 which is the largest they can be- they were touching and the right one was actually overlapping a bit. He was amazed and quickly recommended tosilectomy and removal of adnoids. This is not a routine procedure anymore like in the past. I am very cautious about medications and surgery. I researched different treatments and the only thing we kept coming back to was the surgery. We scheduled it and I cannot even tell you how her life has changed. She actually sleeps through the night and her behavior has improved b/c she is not exhausted from interrupted sleep every night. Google sleep apenea for children to see all symptoms and signs. They think my daughter could have been waking up 30-40 times b/c lack of air. Best of luck!
KSM

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It is possible that I could loan you something to try with your daughter.

T.,
I had a similar problem, Samantha was waking up every 1-2 hours. I had to just close her door, putting a child lock on the inside, and leave the house. I made my husband stay with her so that she could cry it out. I even went to my parents house to sleep, because I knew I would break down and put her in our bed. It is tough, and she will scream
a lot, but it is worth it in the end. As far as the potty-use goes, we put a little potty in her room, so she could go when she felt the need. Good luck and stay strong.

I think you said it yourself... she won't go to sleep "very easily" without one. It sounds like she knows that when she keeps it up she'll get her drink (which she doesn't really NEED) and she'll get to come into mom and dad's bed eventually. You have to be tough and tell her no more middle of the night drinks and she needs to stay in her bed. Go into her room and comfort her when she wakes and remind her that she's a big girl and then leave... no giving in. I bet she'll get it sooner than you think. Explain to her that you can't keep getting up like that.. you need your sleep too... and maybe there could be reward in it for her if she doesn't call for you all night. The key though is NOT to give in on the drinks/getting into your bed. Good luck.

Buy giving her drinks and taking her potty, you are only rewardind her for waking up all the time. Even leaving a cup of water next to her bed is telling her it's ok to wake up and not have the need to go back to sleep. To get up one time for potty is fine but other than that, you need to put her back to bed. We just put our 21 month old in a twin bed from the crib and I we had to work with him to stay in bed and now he doesn't get out unless I put the mesh rail down. We used the "Super Nanny" advice on how to put him back to bed and it really did work. We didn't have the battle like most of the parents on the show but it seemed effective even for a child so young that doesn't have any reasoning skills.

Good luck!
S.