Sleep Through the Night - ? When Do You Start Training for That..

Updated on June 04, 2009
S.B. asks from Dallas, TX
16 answers

I have heard many different views on this, i have a 3 month old and I am trying to see what we should start doing to prepare him to sleep longer than 3-4 hours during the night. Any advice is appreciate. Thanks!

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G.H.

answers from Chicago on

This is not something you "plan for". When he's ready to sleep more, he will. He'll eat bigger more filling meals (not just milk in a bottle). He'll be dry diaper and warm and cozy. Mobiles are a helpful thing to entertain baby when he first wakes (it'll give you a few wxtra winks).

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L.C.

answers from Chicago on

If the baby is not sleeping through the night, start getting him in the habit. Try feeding right before bed and getting in a routine. Do whatever it takes, read the books suggested if needed. It will be best for you and the baby. But i dont suggest letting him crying it out at this age. He is too young in my opinion. Just get into a routine, keep his room cool and dark and let him sleep as long as possible.

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C.

answers from Chicago on

The Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child book I liked a lot too. Seems that helping the eating to be routine, the sleep then falls into place creating healthy sleeping habits allowing you to place the baby to bed content without a crutch of feeding before bed or rocking motion to fall asleep. We did a 3 hour routine, eating every 3 hours so at 6am, 9am, noon, 3pm, 6pm, 9pm, and then an added last feeding right before bed at 10pm. Nap time would begin halfway between eating times, so 7:30am, 10:30am, 1:30pm, 4:30pm, 7:30pm, 10:30pm down for the night. So I'd aim for a schedule like this making those eating times as consistent as possible and placing them down for a nap at those times even if they didn't seem tired yet (showing signs of being tired often come when they are already OVERtired making it harder for them to fall asleep). Feeding in the night was on demand only, so that was the first feedings to naturally drop, which meant they were sleeping through the night at around 3 months old from 10:30pm-6am. Will take a couple weeks to get used to it, but it's a natural way to encourage them to sleep through the night, along with an easy way to keep them happy and cared for before they *demand* to be cared for. Plus it's more predictable for planning your day. Worked really well for us along with for several families I work with. Best wishes to you! :) As far as when it's time to lengthen out the routine, we went to a 4 hour schedule after the babies were sleeping through the night and when they began to consistently not want to wake up at feeding times and were not real eager to eat at feeding times, then we knew it was time to spread the schedule a bit to a 4 hour routine. Another child I knew was on a 4 hour schedule from the time she was in the hospital (was in the hospital for a while being born early), and they stuck with the 4 hour schedule from the beginning and it worked well for them. For us, it worked best to begin with a 3 hour schedule and then later transition to the 4 hour schedule.

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R.A.

answers from Chicago on

Read Dr. Weissbluth, Happy Child, Healthy Sleep Habits. My 3 year old and 5 month old have slept through the night (12 hours) since they were 3 months old! It truly works and is great for their health, brain development, and attitude.

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T.K.

answers from Chicago on

Start NOW!

My 3-1/2-month-old has been routinely sleeping 8+ hours at night since he was 8 weeks old. I started sleeping training at 6 weeks with him. It works! I followed the advice in "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Marc Weissbluth. There are still some nights when he sleeps only 4-6 hours at a time but they are rare and he always goes right back to sleep after eating.

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T.D.

answers from Chicago on

My son (now 2 1/2) was a horrible sleeper from birth. By six months he was still waking up 3-4 times at night. He also needed to be held and rocked to sleep which took up to 45 minutes each night. He wouldn't nap in his crib, etc. My pediatrician recommended I put him down still awake, but he hated it and I had a 3 year old at home to deal with too, so I never did it.

One weekend when my hsuband and I were both home at bedtime, I implemented the Ferber sleep method. Some people call it "crying it out" and I know some people think its "cruel" to babies, but the method is much more nuanced than that so I think parents should do whatever works best for their baby and their family. The process is, you put the baby down drowsy and then check in on them at various intervals, which increase as the night(s) of training go on. The book does recommend that if your constant coming and going is making the baby MORE upset, you should stretch it out. The first night my son cried for 45 minutes. I was in tears and my stomach was in knots. The next night 15 and the next night 5.

The change was miraculous. Not only was he able to settle himself to sleep, but he started sleeping 7-8 hours overnight as well. I can't explain what a HUGE positive difference that was to my family. I was able to give my 3 year old a proper bedtime, with stories, in her room. My stress level plummeted and I was able to sleep through the night for the first time since I was pregnant! I am a strong believer in helping our children develop good sleep habits, for some babies it comes naturally and others need help. So as hard as that weekend was, it was totally worth it. To this day, my son is the BEST sleeper. He can fall asleep anywhere, at grandmas, on vacation, etc. and ALWAYS sleeps through the night. So good luck!

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S.O.

answers from Champaign on

He is probably capable of it right now. I liked the book On Becoming Babywise.

The basic concept is to make sure they have full meals and good naps during the day and that will encourage good night sleeping. I wish I'd done it with my first, but it worked with my other three kids.

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M.K.

answers from Chicago on

Hi There! I, too, found the Healthy Sleep habits, Happy Child" book to be an outstanding resource.

A huge part of getting better, and longer stretches of sleep at night, is getting the baby's daytime naps on an appropriate schedule. As your baby turns 4 months old, this is a great time to try sleep training methods!

It is very normal and common for a baby aged 4-8 months to wake for eating 2 times during a night (assuming a bedtime of 6-8pm and wake time of 7am). My children didn't truly sleep through the night until they were 9-10 months old (sleeping 6:30pm-6:30am without waking).

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V.N.

answers from Chicago on

Congrats on your little bundle. We too tried Dr. Weissbluth's "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" and it helped us immensely by getting three good naps during the day and setting a bedtime (probably around 6 months of 8 pm which works with our schedule). However, despite all of that my baby just started sleeping through the night at eight months. We chose to feed him at night and not let him cry but that was based on his low weight.

I don't have any new advice but don't want you to be discouraged if the baby doesn't sleep through the night soon.

Good luck!

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N.P.

answers from Chicago on

I have learned to start where I want to end. If I want the child to end up sleeping through the night, going to sleep on their own, etc. then I should start there. Your child is old enough if you think they are.
Here's a method that should help you -

try using the Baby Whisperer's EASY method for a schedule, and the Happiest Baby on the Block 5 s's method. Those two combined will make cio not be a needed thing (at that age)
EASY - when the baby wakes up it Eats. After you feed it, then it has Activity - bouncy seat, tummy time, sitting up and playing with toys, swing, exersaucer, etc. When the baby gets fussy check the B's - boredom, butt or burp. If it's none of those then off to Sleep. Don't wait for the baby to do more than get the tiniest bit fussy, then see what is causing the fusses - if it's just that they needed their diaper change do that, but if it's not the activity is boring, the butt is dirty or they have to burp, then put them down. This may happen after as short as 45 minutes, don't freak, it really means they are tired.
Now, to get them to sleep use the 5 s's. Swaddle the baby, hold the baby on their side and sway as they suck on something (paci, your knuckle or their finger/thumb) and make a shush noise. This will calm your baby. When the baby is calm, but not asleep yet, keeping them swaddled lay them in the bed. I like to pat them instead of sway after a minute or two cause you can still pat after they are put down but you can't sway, so pat the baby and continue patting gradually decreasing it as you put them in the bed. Also continue the shushing as you put them down, again gradually getting quieter.

Make sure you are sleeping the baby in a DARK place - I like putting black felt over the windows (attach it using the scratchy side of velcro). Also make sure there is white noise or music. These will both help.
If you do these two you will find a well rested, easily managed baby in no time.

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K.

answers from Chicago on

3 months is a bit young to sleep train - I would wait until at LEAST 4 months and probably closer to 6. Keep in mind that just because your baby sleeps through (and note that the definition of "sleeping through" is 6 hours at a stretch - not "through" like one would think) at ** months, doesn't mean that he/she will sleep through at **+2 months. Babies have various things that disrupt their sleep at various time points - teething, developmental milestones, travel, time changes, etc.

At 3 months of age you can start forming a nighttime routine - bath, songs, nursing etc - so that he can develop some cues to get him in a sleeping mood. When he wakes to eat at night you can walk - not run - to get him. If you let him fuss a few minutes (not cry hysterically, just fuss) then he may actually roll over and fall back asleep. This is good to teach him to self soothe. Also, if you have him napping in one place but sleeping at night in another, it's time to get him napping where he sleeps at night. This will help him associate his crib/co-sleeper/your bed (wherever he is at night) with sleeping.

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L.H.

answers from Chicago on

I just had my second child 6 weeks ago today and she is basically sleeping through the night. She actually started sleeping longer about 2 weeks ago sleeping about 5-6 hours stright. I know some mom's do this and some mom's don't like it but I just started putting a little bit of cereal in her bottle this week. I did this with my oldest and it worked like a charm. Just put in tiny bit just to make them stretch a little longer at night. Last night I gave her a bottle at 10 and she was basically asleep by 11 and got up this morning with her at 7. She takes basically 3-4 naps a day right now. Trying to get start on a schedule is the best thing you can do for you and your baby.

P.S.
Please Mom's don't bash me for doing this

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M.R.

answers from Chicago on

Our son started 'sleeping through the night' (not waking for a bottle plus sleeping from like 10:00 - 7:00) around 3 months. We started Dr. Weissbluth's "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" techniques at 6 months when naps and the actual "going to bed" part was disastrous. It took literally 3 days and he was a sleep champ, not to mention wayyyy happier and content during the day.

He is now just over two and still goes to bed between 6:45 - 7:00, with a wake time between 6:30 - 8:00 (depending on if he has to get up to go to daycare), and takes a solid 3+ hour nap everyday.

Good luck to you - definitely read the book if you are interested in learning more about your baby's sleep cues and how to help him sleep for longer blocks of time. If it doesn't work for you, or other techniques are better - no biggie! It's your child and your family life, and you know better than anyone else what the best technique/schedule is for your unique situation!

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T.L.

answers from Chicago on

honestly 3 to 4 hours a night in a month old is excellent! I wouldnt mess with that or you may just end up with every 2 hour wake up calls!

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T.O.

answers from Chicago on

I didn't even know you could do sleep training. All 3 of mine just started sleeping through the night on their own...all between 2 and 3 months. Good Luck!

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M.P.

answers from Chicago on

Whatever you decide to do, don't put cereal in a bottle!!! All he will get is a stomach ache. Bottles are for breastmilk or formula, not food. Food belongs on a plate/bowl. And just my 2 cents, 3-4 hours of sleep for a 3 month old is pretty average and great. Babies naturally lengthen their sleep on their own. "Training" or not, they know what they need. His needs are his wants for at least his first year.

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