Baby Bedtime/sleep Advice

I recommend reading the baby whisperer books by tracy hogg. Her EASY routine and helpful advice for sleeping helped my girl sleep through the night by 12 weeks. She wasnt breastfed, but there is a section on breastfeeding moms. Good luck!

I just wanted to echo the advice for "Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child" by Dr. Wiessbluth.
I'm also a first time Mom, and wished I had read it earlier (I read it when I started having problems getting my then 13 month old daughter to bed) It would have been good to start the advice earlier even though we weren't having any problems.

The other book I would recommend which also has some great advice is called something like the No Cry Sleep solution. I can't remember the authors name, but you should be able to google it (she has a website) or search amazon for it.

I took both out of the library and learned a lot of great things reading them.

Enjoy the ride! It really starts to get fun starting around 8 weeks, and just keeps on getting better (my daughter is now 15 months).

Hi S...
I have a 16 month old son and a daughter on the way due in Oct. I had no idea with my first the importance of getting a baby on a "schedule" so to speak. At 8-9 months I was still getting up 1-2 times a night without feeding him. Needless to say I was eshausted. I was told by a client/friend of mine to get a book called "Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child" by Dr. Wiessbluth....totally changed everything...now he goes down b/w 7&8 and wakes up at 6am no interruptions and it worked within a week or 2. The book is the best advice i can give you. Good luck....the book also says that the earlier you put them on a schedule the better they sleep as they get older. Happy Sleeping!!
B. P.
St. Louis MO

Hi S.,

Congrats on your new baby! I have 2 girls ages 5 and 7. Their schedules were almost identical. They would get up around 6:00 am and I would nurse about 7:00. We would have some "play" time and stimulation, and then around 9:00 they would take a nap in their cribs. About 11:00, they would get up, I would nurse and then more playtime. At 2:00 they would go down again in their own cribs and nap to about 4:00. They would get up and I would nurse again with more playtime. At about 6:30 they always got a bath and were back to bed by 7:00. By the time the oldest was 9 wks old, she was sleeping through the night to 6:00 am and the youngest actually came home from the hospital sleeping through the night. I stopped waking her for midnight feedings at 4 wks with the permission of her doc. Now at ages 5 and 7, during school, the youngest is in bed by 7:00 and the oldest by 7:30. They are usually asleep within 10 minutes, and I have no problems getting them up at 6:00 for school. The key that I found was to be consistent. (Since you are a therapist, you know how much kids need limits and consistency. That's true even at 8 wks.) I tried to do my errands during their awake times. I tried always to have them home to be in their own beds during sleeptime. I was fortunate to not have to put them in daycare during this time. I followed the basic ideas in the "Babywise". I know that a lot of moms frown on this series of books, but for me, it was a God send. Both of my girls continued to take good 2-3 hour naps in the afternoons until they were 3 and still had no problems with going to bed in the early evening. Good luck to you! God bless! J.

Hi S.,

I say if he's tired, let him go ahead and go to sleep. It's okay if his bedtime is before yours, although once you both return to work, you will probably miss all the time you have with him. But if he's tired, it's best that he gets his rest.

I remember when my daughter was that age, she got tired around 7 PM too. So, what I did was give her a bath early in the afternoon around 2 or 3 PM instead of in the evenings. In the winter, when it was colder in the evenings, she seemed to like the afternoon bathtimes better anyway. Then when she was tired in the evening after dinner, I would nurse her and put her to sleep. You are so blessed to have a good sleeper. If your son is already sleeping six hours straight, I wouldn't do anything to disrupt it. So, if he ends up falling asleep, I wouldn't wake him for a bath.

If you plan to return to work, you want to make sure he gets his sleep at home because during the transition period, he may need some time to adjust and may not sleep very well at daycare if that's what you have planned for him. Enjoy these precious baby years with him!

S. - we sound like we have the same kiddo :) (And I'm 30, a first time mom, and was a speech-therapist before helping my husband start a business!)

Our little one gets tired around the same time too. We have found the swing is a great friend! Sometimes I'll put our boy in the swing when he's noticeably tired, but happy, to cook dinner. We listen to music and he will often nap for the duration of cooking/eating dinner. When we are just about finished eating, I'll turn off his swing and he will wake up on his own. Then we nurse, and start the bedtime routine - hoping to get him to bed around 9, sometimes it lasts until 10.

I have not read the 'Baby Wise' book, but have a friend that gave me a 'book report' on it :) I like the concept of feeding, playing, then napping. We've tried this the past week or so and it has worked out well. At night, we are a little more relaxed and sometimes I will nurse him to sleep (especially if he hasn't eaten much earlier in the day).

It sounds like you are already on a good routine, with a somewhat loose schedule. (As are we and it's working so far). Our general rule of thumb, as far as nap vs. down for the night is this: if he's tired at 6, he gets a nap in the swing (if that doesn't work, we try to keep him up another hour and put him to bed for the evening) - if he's tired at 8, we go ahead and go with the nighttime routine... I have stopped waking him for nightime feedings/bath since he's on track for weight/height, per our Pediatrician's 'okay'. ((I sometimes have engorgement issues, but that has stablized a little as well))

Each day, we try to get a little closer to a 'schedule' per se. Sometimes, we are dead on - other times, we are more lax... so far, it's working - we just hope it will continue to as our little one gets older :)

Good luck! I'm keeping tabs on this thread in case anyone else has ideas that will help us too!

J

I would aim to get four 1.5-2 hours naps, depending on how long he can stay awake. I have a 9 week old and she stays awake for an hour at a time (feeding included) and then naps for the next two hours until it's time to eat again. She obviously eats every 3 hours, about 4.5-5oz. each time. She sleeps pretty much through the night- about 7.5ish hours. I know the timing will grow as she gets a few weeks older. Here is our schedule/routine- whatever you want to call it so it doesn't freak other people out:

7am: wake and feed, play with daddy
8-10am: nap
10am: wake and feed, play in bouncer
11-1pm: nap
1pm: wake and feed, has tummy time
2-4pm: nap
4pm: wake and feed, watches my oldest and i cook dinner
5-7pm: nap
7pm: wake and feed, plays with mommy and daddy
8-10pm: nap (we consider this bedtime- not a nap, really.)
10pm: feed and goes right back to bed.

You want them to be able to stay awake after eating and put them down awake but drowsy. They need to learn to self-soothe and put themselves to sleep. But that's just my opinion...obviously it works somehow because I had a 2.5y/o that slept through at 6 weeks to the day and my 9w/o slept through at about 7 weeks...BTW, I am a "BabyWise" mom and contrary to what other people say (simply because they haven't read the book), it's not about denying your child food AT ALL, it's just saying try to problem solve before shoving the boob in your childs mouth...

I would reccomend that you make his afternoon nap a little bit later. The later the better. That way, you can put him to bed later and night, and hell sleep better. My daughter usually slept most of the time at this age. She also slept through the night. Her afternoon naps were usually about 2-3pm. That way, we could have our together time after we got off work, and then she could go to sleep when we did.

Hope this helps!

I am also a first time mom of a wonderful 5 month old baby boy. My son was also very tired in the evening and we were able to get him on a schedule with him guiding the way. I also work so it was important for me to get him on an eating and sleeping schedule (flexible schedule that is). I am also exclusively breastfeeding. Around 2.5 months our sleep schedule was to wake around 7:30 or 8am then he would go back down for a nap around 9:30 for an hour or so. He would then be awake from 10:30 to 12:30 and then go down for another nap until about 4:00pm. Then he would start to get tired again in the evening and take a short 30 - 45 minute nap around 6:00. I would try to make sure he was awake by 7:00 (waking him if I had to) then he went to bed for the night by 8 or 8:30 and sleep until around 2 or 3am then back to bed until morning. I am a nurse and my husband is an engineer and this works well for us. Just this week he is getting out of needing to take a nap in the evening depending on what time he wakes up from his afternoon nap. Hope this helps.

Sounds like you are already doing a great job. I nursed exclusively too and you really have to follow the needs of your baby. What I did was put my baby to bed in the evening whenever he was ready. He'd be asleep long before my husband and I were ready to go to bed. Later at night, before I went to bed, I'd go get my sleeping son and "top him off" by nursing him in his sleep. That got his tummy full and helped him sleep further into the night. But if your son is sleeping 5 - 6 hours a night already - why mess with a good thing?

He is sleeping wonderfully! Good for you! You had a response with a feeding schedule, but I would respectfully say not to feel overwhelmed with that... especially b/c he is nursing. You never really know how much they are eating when they nurse, so I would say - continue to feed him on demand! As far as bedtime goes, the sleep experts say that a babies biological clock is set for bedtime right around 7:00 (give or take an hour), so your little guy seems to be right on track!

Good Luck!

If he's getting sleepy around 6-8 pm, go ahead and put him down for the night. My daughter, now 19 months, has had a 7:00-7:30 pm bedtime since she was around his age, and she's been sleeping through the night since then too.

Take your son's queues, and try to keep him on a routine as much as you can. Kids thrive on routine, especially when it comes to sleep training. You don't have to be absolutely rigid about it though. It's not too early to start a bedtime routine either, like nursing, then getting in pajamas, then reading a story or singing a song, and then off to bed. Having a routine like this will help your son learn that night time is coming and it's time to sleep, and let him relax and get comfortable. Just find something that works for your family and try to stick to it.

Keep in mind though, that what his schedule is now, might not be his schedule in a month... let alone a week. And he might have quite a few sleep disruptions for a while, and that's completely normal.

Sounds like his schedule is a good one already. Our girls didn't go to bed until 9 or 10 when they were that age and they woke up either for a 3 am feeding then again at 7 or they awoke at 6 am for the morning. If he gets sleepy late in the evening, nurse him and put him down. He may awake once in the night for another feeding, but after a few more months he'll start sleeping thru the night, hopefully.

There is nothing wrong with waking him up when he's been asleep for a while. Especially if it is getting late in the afternoon/early evening. Wake him up and feed him or play with him and after a few hours start your bed routine. And trust me he's not to young to get into a schedule. Both of my girls were in a schedule by the time they were two months old. It made it easier to go shopping, church, take baths (just me) or whatever. If you start working on a schedule now, by the time he's 6 months old he'll be on a good schedule and you'll be a lot more free to do more things with and without him. And he should be sleeping thru the night too. Don't fret, though, sounds like he's doing good. Enjoy him while he's little. Good luck and God Bless.

I would put him to bed when he is tired. To help him learn to be awake during the day and sleepy at night, it worked for my family to keep things active during the day, and very calm at night. We would do all of our normal things during the day, regardless of whether my daughter was sleeping or not. We kept the house bright (preferably with sunlight) during the day and then dim at night. After bed time we didn't do anything exciting. If we stayed up after she was asleep, we kept things quieter and darker. She worked things out pretty quickly on her own. We always put her to sleep when she was tired and she just adjusted when her naps and bedtime were to meet her needs and get in sync with the day/night cycle.

I highly recommend "Good Night, Sleep Tight: The Sleep Lady's Gentle Guide to Helping Your Child Go to Sleep, Stay Asleep and Wake Up Happy" by Kim West. Good luck!!

well, i always put my kids to bed about 7-ish when they were that age, and moved it up to 8 as they got a little more active. my assvice to you is to let sleeping babies lie...if he's asleep, soundly asleep, at that time of the evening, let him sleep. he'll wake up when he needs food. and rejoice! the aap says "sleeping thru the night" is sleeping a 5 hr stretch of uninterrupted sleep..so yay for your little man!

Hey S.! I would let the baby sleep whenever he wants to. I have a 2 year old daughter and a 4 month old son, and like your son, they both were tired late afternoon/early evening. I think waking him up to eat/bathe, etc. is fine, too. We did it. Another thing I found helpful, and I'm sure some will disagree, is I woke them up just before we were ready to go to bed for one last feeding, usually 10:30-11:00. Even if it was just a small feeding, it seemed to carry them through a few more hours before they were awake again. But, 5-6 hours straight for an 8 week old is great. Best wishes!

At 8 weeks our now nine month old went to bed at 6 p.m. He would get a feeding if he wanted one and eventually that went away. Now his bedtime is 7:30 p.m. They are all different. A good book the check out that might help is Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child by Dr. Mark Weissenbluth (sp). Can't recommend it enough.

S.,

I come from a family of 15 children - I was #5 and have had 2 of my own. My experience tells me that there is no rule that works for all and at 8 weeks the baby is still sleeping pretty much of the time. I always found it best to let them pretty much set their own schedule. There will come a time - probably in about another 8 weeks when he will be awake a little longer and also sleep for a longer period of time. Mybe you'll put him down at 8pm and he'll sleep till 5 or 6am without waking.
The babies grow very fast and in doing so they use a lot of energy and need a lot of sleep. Did you know that it is our sleeping hours that our bodies do their repair work.
I also think that you as the baby's parents are more in tune to him than anyone you might talk to over the net - trust in your own gut feelings - I do understand that that is all you have to work with right now because he is your first experience...but really, trust yourself and follow your natural Motherly and fatherly instincts, you will find the right routine that works for the whole family. don't get up tight - enjoy him in the moment because they don't stay babies for long.

A little about me: My children ar 31 and 27 yr. I'm a Shaklee Distributor and a Health and Wellness Advisor. I help people make informed choices and lifestyle changes to imptove their health and/or the health of the environment...and YES, I recommend safe, non-toxic, 'green' products. My website is www.shaklee.net/ser

If I can help in any other way - please let me know
S. Riemann

hello- my baby takes an evening nap and sleeps fine through the night. i actually have a harder time putting her down if we miss the evening nap.

best of luck :)

Read "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Marc Weissbluth. It will tell you how babies and children should be sleeping at every stage of development. It's unlikely that your baby's sleep schedule will match up with your own in some ideal way. He is probably quite ready for bedtime b/t 6 and 8pm. Don't wake him up to bathe him! That is highly unnecessary.

Things change constantly with baby sleep. So whatever schedule you get on in the next few weeks will change again before you know it. Read that book! Highly recommended!

Hey S.,

I have a 4 month old son and I know what you're going through. His schedule is still changing from time to time as he needs it. I try to keep most things consistent, but when he's tired things don't always stay the same. If your son is tired - put him to sleep. If you keep him up he'll be overtired and it could affect how well he sleeps at night and his naps the next day. It's okay to get him ready for bed at an early time - doesn't mean he'll stay asleep, but will give him cues that it's time to wind down. Also, he only needs a bath once a week so don't feel stressed to give him one every night. If you want a bath to be part of his bedtime routine - then go ahead and do it early (again signaling time to wind down) and eventually he'll settle on a bedtime. If he's anything like my son - you'll think you have a routine going and then he'll change it all. :) Best of luck to you.

J.

I don't know THE answer but I think I would let him take an evening nap then bed time @ 9:30 or 10. This will probably only last for a short while(or anything else you choose as his schedule will naturally change as he gets a few months older).
PS
Good for you and him on strictly breastfeeding!!!!

I suggest reading the book "On Becoming Baby Wise". It is kinda controversial, but i have two children and it worked for me both times, for my cousin twice, for her sister once, and a friend of mine as well. I want to stress that the author, if read properly and all the way through, is not advocating letting your baby cry when he is hungry or whatever. He says to learn the cries and respond appropriatly.

That said, your baby is NOT too young for a schedule. When my daughter was 8 weeks old, I returned to work and she slept from 7:30pm until 5:00 am every night. I got up at 5:00 to breastfeed her and she'd go back down at about 7:00. My son wasn't such a great sleeper, but he was sleeping soon after I returned back to work at 6 weeks. So, it is possible. The routine is critical as babies don't understand clocks. they organize their days by what happens next. Your baby is so new and everything is brand new. so, a routine provides comfort. Remember though to allow for some flexibility in your routine so you don't go next. I had my kids on a 3 hour routine b/c it worked best for them, but we fluxuated half an hour either way of the predetermined hour. Good luck.

Perhaps a short nap would be a good idea in the evenings, maybe an hour or so. That could give you and your husband a little time alone together for dinner, which would be nice. Then you could wake baby for a bath and nuring. He probably won't need that evening nap for too much longer and you can eventually move up his bedtime as he phases out that evening nap. Both of my kids were exclusively breast-fed. My oldest was a champion sleeper. At 7 weeks he started sleeping through the night and he'd go to bed every night at 7:00 and wake up the next morning at 6:30 or 7:00. It was divine! Then #2 came along! He ended up being a co-sleeper, which wasn't what we planned, but it was what he needed. However, he'd spend the first few hours of the night in his crib and we'd bring him into our bed later. He'd usually go down around 8:00 and end up in our bed around 1:00 am or so. If you get him into a loose routine, he'll guide you as to what his needs are. And once he's approaching age 1, you can tweak your schedule around his napping and find what is a good fit for all of you. Good luck!

It is never too early for a schedule. I had my baby on a schedule the first week he was home by letting him guide it. He ate and slept like clockwork from the beginning. He still takes a 1-hour evening nap (is 6-mo-old) and goes to bed around 9:30. I would try letting him take a nap, feed him and put him to bed for the night. If he is going to bed too early, he will rise earlier. If he is going to bed super tired, he won't sleep as well. Hope this helps!

Dear S.

Good MOrning! I would say if your son is going to
bed at 9:00pm and sleeping 5or6 hours at night by all
means keep that schedule. My boys didn't sleep through the night until they were 3yrs old. If he wants to take a short nap at 6:00pm while fixing supper that would help you out
and after supper wake him up adn both parents have time
with him and then around 8:00pm give him a bath and then
nurse him. After you nurse your son have your husband put
him to bed so your son doesn't totally depend on you to
put him to bed at night. My husband would never put the
kids to bed and they got use to me doing it all the time
untill they got in the teens.
Hope thie helps you and your husband out.
B. K.

Hi S.,
Well here's my opinion, get him on a sleeping eating schedule now. You want him up more during the day then at night and you want him taking his long sleeping stretches at night.

So I would go with every 3 hours(maybe even 2 1/2) on a feeding schedule.
So let's start with 6 am being the first feeding of the day.
So it would like this:
6:00 am
9:00 am
12:00(noon)
3:00 pm
6:00 pm
9:00 pm
12:00 (midnight)
3:00 am
6:00 am (the next morning)
At your 6 am feeding get him up, diaper changed, and dresses for the day.
He can sleep anywhere in between these time but you want an emphesis on morning nap, between 9 am and 12 noon would be a good time. In his bed for nap but bright in his room, get in the habit of telling him "nap time" when you lay him down.
Then you want him back up for his noon feedind and try to keep him up for an hour or so and back down for a nap around 1 pm - 3 pm with waking up and having a feeding.
After his 3 pm feeding you want him to take a 1 - 2 hour catnap so he would be up around 4 - 5 pm and eat at 6 pm again.
At 6 pm you want to feed him again and at 8 pm start your bedtime routine (try to keep him up from now until he has his feeding at 9 pm) Bath, breastfeed, Book/cuddle time, Bed.
9 pm bedtime, you want him to be down for the night, a good rule of thumb for the night time is "never wake a sleeping baby", so let him sleep. If he wakes up nurse him but right back to bed. Don't turn on any bright lights, only night lights.
So from 9 pm until 6 am - idealy you want him to sleep. If you could get him to sleep until his 3 am feeding you would be doing awesome. Then he would eat at 6 am again and you would start the day over again.
No matter what you want his awake time more in the daytime then at night. You want to work towars him sleeping atleast 6 hours a night starting from here on out. And you want to everntually weed out the 3 am feedings, to where he sleeps the entire night.

I have had all 4 of my kids on a schedule from the day they were born, W. B.

Hello S.,

I would suggest purchasing the book, Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child by Dr. Marc Weissbluth. My pediatrician recommended it when my son was a newborn (he is now two and a half). This book is wonderful. In about a month he should be sleeping throughout the night and should be getting about 12 hours of sleep just at night. My son was exclusively breast fed for a year and the book worked great with our schedule. I would HIGHLY recommed reading this book.

Congratulations on your little blessing!!

I am also a first time mom, and I exclusively breastfed for the first six months (still breastfeeding my 14 month old, but now with food also). I always let my son lead the way with feedings and sleeping. If he's tired, put him down. When he's hungry or thirsty, nurse him. It really is that simple. I wouldn't worry too much about a schedule or try to 'make' him adapt to yours until six months or so. By then, he should be aware of the differences in day and night (lights off at night, sunshine during day, etc.).

Best of luck and Blessings to you!