My daughter will be 2 in May. She is the youngest of 3 kids, so you'd think I would have this down by now, lol, but she's much different from my other kids!! So, needless to say, I've got some not-so-great habits to help her break!
First issue is the bottle. My pediatrician isn't concerned at all since many babies nurse until they are 2. She will take a sippy cup, but prefers a bottle when it's time for naps, bed, or car rides. How do I break that habit? I've tried cold turkey, where I'm aware she'll have to cry it out at bedtime. But, that does not work!!! We tried that for 3 nights, and she literally screamed ALL night! When I say all night, I mean literally all night--8pm until 5am!!! We can't have that with my husband getting up at 5am with barely any sleep.
Now on to the binky....My middle daughter didn't have one, so I'm needing a refresher on this one. Like the bottle, she uses her binky as a comforting mechanism. How do I get rid of it, and should I replace it with a different comfort object??
Last, but not least, potty training!! She is ready!! The second she pees or poops, she wants that diaper off. There can be a drop of urine, and it needs to come off. My son was 3 when he potty trained & my daughter was about 25 months. She is only 21 months, so the youngest. Where do I begin with her??
Sorry about all the questions in a single post!! I look forward to all the advice I get. Thanks in advance!!
Don't try to do all of this at once. Her little head will explode. Can you imagine all of that stuff happening to you as an adult? You'd pass out! One thing at a time.
I don't see any ergency doing any of the above right now....she's just 2, and if she's your last....I would want her to stay a baby as long as possible. Just my opinion.
I would say to get her off the bottle or binky first, and sorry, but cold turkey is the best. Reasoning doesn't work with a child this young, and having the bottle or binky sometimes is "teasing" them, something pointed out to me by our pediatrician. YOU set the tone so talk to her during the day and let her know she's a big girl now, that the bottles or binkies are leaving, and that you know she may be sad but no screaming at bedtime or during the night. If she does you just may have to stay up all night with her for a week or so, the reality is the longer they use them the harder it is to give them up.
Make her a part of throwing them away and seeing them go in the trash and get rid of the trash (tossing them right before it's picked up is good so you can't cave and dig them out. My sister drove to a fast food restaurant and used their trash bin to toss them there, she KNEW she would cave.) My guy was 13 months and it was time to ditch the bottle, per his ped, and the day we began this I couldn't find his "suckie" at bedtime. I didn't want to undue the "no more bottles" so he went without both that night. He cried and fussed a bit, asked for it the next day (I found the pacifier later that day and tossed it) at nap and bedtime, asked again on the 3rd day and never again for either. In retrospect it was harder for him to give up the paci, he NEVER asked for the bottle! I didn't replace either with another lovie as he already had one he is very loyal to, "Arnold" is his guy! Once the bottles are gone giive her milk to drink before her nap and bedtime, then a sippy with water for taking to bed to keep the milk sugars off her teeth.
Another method I've heard is effective when ditching the binky is to cut the tips, so the child doesn't get the same effect when they suck on it. Usually what happens is the child makes the decision to not use them anymore and toss them, and if they say it's broken and demand new ones YOU have to not buy any new ones ; )
As far as potty training goes, wanting her diaper off is just one sign of readiness, and if you change her with every drop you're going to go through a LOT of diapers or undies. Check out the lists to see if she is TRULY ready, or you may be on here a few weeks later saying she's not "getting it" ; )
http://www.parentingscience.com/toilet-training-readiness...
Some of the "signs" are learned behavior, so put a potty in the bathroom now, and take her in there with you when you go, so she can see you pull your pants down, sit, wipe, pull your pants back up and wash your hands, all part of what she will need to know to become potty trained. Don't make her sit at first, but let her learn the steps until you feel she can mimic you or wants to from what she's observed, by then you should have figured out her "times" she needs to go pee and poop and can sit her at those times. I've found the more pre-training you do the easier the training is.
Hope it all goes well for you both!
Cry it out doesn't mean you let the kid scream their heads off into exhaustion. What true cry it out is all about is letting the child know you are there if they need you but while training and teaching them to put themselves to sleep, self-comfort and self soothe.
I would do most of these things in stages probably with some slight overlapping. I would get rid of the bottle and swap it out for a cup. Cut back on the binky and eventually cut a hole across the top of the binky and trim more and more off so it just wasn't pleasant any longer. As for the potty training, getting her some big girl underwear and teaching her how to get onto the toilet. We never used a potty for any of the six kids I took through that stage of life. We always only ever used the toilet. I would also get her some rubber pants for when she has accidents. Be connsistent, deliberate and loving through this process. Understand that it is a process.
I could have written your post, minus the binky or potty training part. My 2 yr old daughter is also the youngest of 3, and she still has her bottle, which I need to get her off of soon. I haven't had the heart to take it from her yet, but I know I need to do it now. She turned 2 in February. I'm thinking of weaning mine off of her bottle slowly, maybe just one for bed only and then eventually to none at all. Maybe you could try that, instead of cold turkey. Good luck.
First of all, I'd work on one of these issues at a time. I'd start with the bottle. Try switching to just water in the bottle. It won't be as tempting to her as milk, and she'll probably self-wean pretty quickly after that.
If she's allowed to have the pacifier at any time, then right now (while also working on the bottle), I'd start limiting the pacifier to when she's in her bed. Then, once she's been off the bottle for a couple of weeks, I'd just explain that it's time to let go of the binky. You could try putting it in a stuffed animal as I've heard of others doing. Or you could ask her to give them to a younger friend to use, or someone who is having a baby soon. Or you could just cut the tip and say "uh oh, it's broken!"
I'd do the potty training last. Just start putting her on the potty about 20 minutes after meals and wait to see what happens. Don't make a big deal about it.
She won't go to Kindergarten that way.
She will be done with it all, by then.
Just don't stop everything at the same time.
Does she have a Lovey? Kids like and need a comfort item. It is normal.
So besides her bottle for those times, does she have a Lovey? Or several?
My kids did and do.
Ditto Patricia G.
i would do the bottle then the paci. cold turkey the bottle. get rid of them after she goes to bed. then just offer the cup. for the paci cut little holes in them so they are less appealing to suck on. .
potty training wise do it last because thats not something that can ruin her teeth and oral bite.
I let my daughter have a bottle at nap and bedtime until she was 3. She was never allowed to keep it with her. Before her third birthday we had a talk. Me "Three-year-olds don't need bottles." Her "OK." Done. When she's old enough to be without it, she won't cry all night.
Mine never took a paci, so didn't deal with that.
Mine was trained by 26 months. Just started early and took it slowly, no pressure. She was a stubborn one from the beginning, so wanted the diapers gone before she was old enough for it to become a power struggle.
I would go for potty training first. To me that is enough changes for a while. The bottle and the binky are harmless enough. Especially since she really is still so young. I don't know what her bed/ nap bottle routine is, but maybe sit with her while she drinks it then take it out with you.
The binky, well my older son had one until after his 5th bay (extreme, I know), only to sleep, and i was surprised by how many of his friends still "secretly" had one too. He truly needed it, and when he stopped it was on his own terms and drama free. He is nearing 7 now and he is a crazy smart, social, happy, well adjusted kid with very healthy teeth. Both his dentist and pediatrician said it was fine as long as he was done by adult teeth. So if you really want to get her on the road to getting rid of it, try restricting it to only house and car, then only house, then only to sleep. Just in case your daughter is one of those exceptions like my son who refused to fall for the binky fairy or the poking holes or cutting tip. Those methods have helped a LOT of other kids.
I would cation you not to try changing too much in a short time.
