S.W.
My sister's friend had her daughter go to Build-a-bear Workshop and stuff the bear with all of her pacifiers. Now she carries around the little bear but is pacifier-free! I thought that was such a creative idea.
Hi,
My son will be 2 in July and is still using a pacifier. I really want it gone b/c it is starting to affect his teeth. I originally started when he was a baby to self soothe for sleep and he eventually wanted it when out of the crib (especially when he is tired. If I don't give it to him or try to tell him no then he goes into a major tantrum and will make all of us crazy (a whole other post on his behavior) I saw on the super nanny episode about talking with the child and had a good idea on putting it in a bag and hanging on a tree stating the "Paci fairy" will come for it to give to a new baby and replace with a toy but my son is too young to understand that. Should I just go cold turkey and let him "cry it out" or is there a way to make him want it less? I thought about cutting the tip off or putting holes in it to reduce the suction power. Do you guys have any suggestions. I never had this problem with my daughter b/c she hated pacifiers. She preferred the boobie instead :)
My sister's friend had her daughter go to Build-a-bear Workshop and stuff the bear with all of her pacifiers. Now she carries around the little bear but is pacifier-free! I thought that was such a creative idea.
My son was 3 before we had to take the Paci away! He had so many stashed in the house he would always find one. Either way we just had to take it and tell him he was a big boy and it was time to give it up. He didn't like it, but sticking to the story made it easier for him to accept. At two years old he should be able to understand it.
My kids both loved their pacifiers. All I did was nip the tip of all of them. My son looked at it funny and then tossed it on the floor. Try it. Good Luck!
Hi H.,
My son threw his pacifier away when he was about 2 1/2 and did not want another one. Since your son is not even 2 yet, why not let him have it a little longer? It won't affect his teeth that much at this point and it will keep him (and you) happy. He will probably give it up on his own. It's not worth fighting with him about at this point - he is too young to understand what you're trying to do. Maybe wait until he is a little older so you can reason with him and then trade it for a toy.
Good luck!
L.
We waited until our daughter was turning 3, but the story we used was that new babies were waiting for binkies and she needed to pass hers on since she was now becoming a big girl. We went back to the hospital where she was born and my husband went in first to warn the nurses about what we were trying to do. They were great! One came out to the lobby, picked up my daughter and told her how happy they were that she was there, and then showed her the nursery. Through the window she pointed out a little baby and told my daughter that baby had been born yesterday and was waiting for her to bring her pacifiers so he could have one. It worked brilliantly--She didn't know that they'd be tossed in the trash the minute we left! We then treated her to an ice cream cone to celebrate her generosity. A little whimpering the first night and that was it. There's no single answer to this, so just go with your gut on what might work best for your little guy. Good luck!
We cut out pacifiers when my son was 3. I was expecting a new child and didn't want him to steal the babies pacifier, and the pacifier was hurting his teeth and causing extra speech issues. We put all the pacifiers up on the tallest shelf in our cupboard and told him that they were gone. He cried the first night and he eventually went to sleep. The next day he asked but didn't throw a fit. Eventually, he won't ask for it anymore. My son was born 2 months ago and we had trouble finding a pacifier for him. He doesn't really like them, but the sucking helps with his stomach problems so we force him to have it. We finally remembered the pacifiers we had hidden, so we sterilized them and gave them to the baby. My older son knows it was his pacifiers but never complains about him having them, in fact he loves being able to give them to his brother. His teeth are growing back together now. So, just stick it out. The tantrums will go away.
we used the paci fairy technique with great success and our daughter waz 2 and a few months old at the time. I was prenant with our second so we wanted rid of the "baby" things before our next came along (bottle, pacifier, diapers). She was on the virge of giving up naps and taking the pacifier away did seal that deal :( but she was moving that way anyway. 2 years old is not too young for this method. Whenever she'd ask for the pacifier, we'd remind her about he fairy and she'd want to hold the toy we got her. In about 4-5 days she stopped asking for it. The first night of going to bed was difficult as it took a lot longer for her to go to sleep than we were used to, but she didn't scream too much, just couldn't fall asleep as easily so kept asking for things but we just stood firm and kept puting her back in her bed, etc.
Good luck!
I used to cut the end of the pacifier or cut a little slit on the end. This makes it no fun to suck on. Then the kids would put it in their mouths and take it out themselves. It may be tough for you at first b/c they will cry for the pacifier. But when they get rid of it themselves it is much easier.
Good Luck!
T.
When we got rid of my daughter's pacifiers she was almost 2 years old. She was only allowed to her her "pacis" while she was in her crib or in the car if it was naptime. We decided it was time for them to go (I was due with another baby in about 5 weeks and wanted her weaned before the baby was born)
We just walked her over to the trashcan with the pacifiers and told her she was a big girl and didn't need them anymore and she threw them out. She asked for them a few times but within 2 days when she asked for them, we would ask her where they went and she would say "in the trash, I no need them anymore, I a big girl" It was actually a lot smoother than I anticipated. And she hasn't regressed, she never tries to put her brother's paci in her mouth.
Good luck.
I didn't have a problem with pacifiers ending but my sister did. She ended up telling her son that she couldn't find them...they were lost. He cried (he was 2 1/2) and wanted to throw fits, and she just looked at him and said she loved him, and she was sorry - but they were all gone. Nigh-night! It was to the point where none of us could understand anything he said because he either talked with the thing in his mouth or sounded like it was anyway! After hours of horrible on & off crying/fitting the first night, he cried himself to sleep. He awoke & asked for them, she repeated everything to him again, he moved on. It was a stick to your guns and don't feel badly about it. He doesn't really need it, he only feels like he does. Good luck & God Bless!
Hi H.,
my son never takes pacifiers, but i totally understand what you are going thru!
My friend cut the tips off, works for her, her daughter was 18 months, im sure they dont understand all but she cryes for couple nights and was all done! On other hand my best friend take way on cold turkey, she say was a hell of week but all worth!!!! I think you are doing a great job and try what ever you think will work for your little one!!! Good luck!!!
I had the same problem with my son, and my daughter was the same (always hated them) I'm still trying to wean her at 2 because she's so attached. I read that pacifiers don't so any permanent damage until after 3 when the hard palate gets less flexible. So even though his teeth looked a little changed, I let him do it until 3 and then did the paci fairy trick. It totally worked, I couldn't believe it. He didn't even get a toy, we just sent the pacifiers away with a thank you note. He was so attached, and was over it in a day. And his teeth went back to normal afterwards. He's got perfectly straight teeth now. He actually gets compliments on them. I'm sad for the day they start to fall out and the big ones come. I don't think cold turkey or crying it out is ever a good choice. It's too stressful. And sucking is how they deal with their stress. Good luck.
We gradually decreased the use of our son's using the bottle and pacifier. The pacifier was only for sleeping. I was afraid he would no longer want to take naps, but what I did was I gave him a teddy bear to go to sleep. Once he was used to that, which didn't take very long. I tried not giving him the pacifier. Luckily he had no issue. He got used to the bear and not a pacifier. He was 14 months old when he was off the bottle and binky. And thank God he didn't go for his thumb. That's the worst because then you can't throw away the finger or have the fairy come get it. ;-) I've seen teenagers sucking their thumb!! It's horrible. I would take the pacifier any day over the thumb sucking. Good luck.
We had a similar situation when our son turned 2. And we did something similar to Super Nanny. We sat him town with all his binkies and a box. It was explained to him ahead of time that when he turned 2, the binkies would be going away because they are for babies only, and he was going to be a big boy. We made a big deal of it. So, we sat him down in front of the box and reminded him that he was 2 now and not a baby anymore. Before we could finish our prepared "resistance" speech, he took all his binkies, threw them in the box, and closed the lid! We had him help us tape it shut, wrote binkies on the outside, and then he watched daddy take them away! And that was that! He had a bit of trouble the first night at bedtime wanting it, but once we reminded him that he was a big boy, the fussing stopped a few minutes later. We had a moment in the middle of the first night when he woke up wanting it, and we just explained it again, and then he was good. It was never an issue after that, and his speech is awesome now! Teeth look good, too!
Hope that helps you!
Demetra gave a good idea-I use to work for a pedo dentist and that was one rec and another idea is sit with the child and make a big deal out of it. Wrap it in a nice box and tell them you are giving it to a baby who needs it and put it curbside for tras. Alot of parents did this and said it worked.GOOD LUCK! L.
Hi H.! I went through the same dilemma with my youngest daughter. We were very worried because we could see her teeth beginning to protrude. Our pediatric dentist assured us that once she gave up the binky, her teeth would go back to normal, and that she could use the binky until she was 3. We gradually reduced her binky time, keeping her busy during the day, trying to give it to her only at bedtime/naptime, or if she asked for it. We never made her feel bad by saying she was a big girl and only babies use binkies. A few months before she turned 3, we started telling her that the binky fairy will come on her third birthday and give her binkies to all the new babies in the world. Then about a month before her birthday, it was bedtime and we couldn't find a binky ANYWHERE in the house. She asked if the binky fairy had come. We said she probably had. End of binkies. We eventually did find two, and have kept them in reserve, but we've never needed them. And her teeth have gone back to where they should be. Good luck!
My daughter loved the pacifier as well. And I didn't want to have to deal with getting her off it later so at about 15 months, I started to limit the range and time of use for the pacifier. Meaning, she could only use it if she was going to sleep, or in her crib. When she woke up in the morning, she had to take it out of her mouth herself in order for me to pick her up and take her out. Otherwise, she stayed in the crib. As far as travels went, I kept 1 with me for emergencies...like naps in the car, she could have it to sleep only, if she stayed awake I asked for it back. It only took 2 or 3 days of this training and 3 weeks later, she was bored with it and spit it out while getting ready for bed and hasn't asked for it since...shes 20 months now. Good Luck!
My babysitter gave me some invaluable advice and she said cut a huge hole in the nipple and the baby will not want it anymore and at first I didn't believe her but I tried it with my oldest daughter and it worked like a charm and I did it again with my second daughter and she absolutely would not touch it after that.
She would walk past it on the floor in her room but would not try to suck it. So cut a huge hole or cut the nipple in half and give it to him and I'm sure he won't take it.
Here's what we did with our first baby. We reduced paci time to only sleeping. We used only 1 pacifier and left it in the bed during the day. One day we went to the store and brought the paci. We left it on a store shelf and "traded" it for a new toy. That way, she knew exactly what happened to it. You could also encourage him to throw it away in the trash in exchange for something. Maybe a new lovey or something else to sleep with. Remember that kids understand so much more than they can articulate.
Our second we went cold turkey and he never had a problem. Our third never took a paci.
I would wait another 6 months or until he "understands". I would then "accidentally" lose the pacifier. He will be upset, since it is something soothing to him.
K. E
My son loved his pacy too but just know that everything takes 3 days. I read this book called "The Secrets of the Baby Whisperer" and it truly was my bible. From it I learned the 3 day rule... give everything 3 days. So one Friday night, I took the pacy's away and by Sunday night, he didn't care anymore. I recommend the book immensely and it taught me so much. Good luck and remember... just give it 3 days.
Yes, we cut a small slit in all of them in the house and let her have them. She was about 2 1/2 when we did this at the advice of friends who did it. It worked! My daughter would take it out of her mouth and we would say, "Uh Oh, broken" It only took about 2 weeks for her to stop asking about it, but she never really got upset because we weren't telling her no or taking it away - sometimes that can be more traumatic and feel like rejection (Mommy not letting me get comfort), but if it's the pacifier that's broken, that becomes the focus and is not so harsh. I hope this works for you, good luck.
Hi H. ~ My son is 2.5 and I just got rid of his pacifier. I was absolutely dreading it but it was so much easier then I thought it was going to be. He was so attached to it. He had it with him everywhere all day long. I started by only giving it to him at bedtime and nap. He would ask for it several times during the day but I told him it was only for naps and bedtime. I did that for about a month and then I decided to go cold turkey. Once it was time for bed he asked for his pacifier and we explained to him that we threw it in the trash and big boys don't need them anymore. He cried a little bit but was over it really fast. The next night he asked for it and we explained the same thing and he seemed to be fine with it. He would still ask for a little while but then he would tell me it was in the trash. He understood very quickly. I think it was more of a security for me then it was him. Good luck with it.
Both my kids loved their binky, but at about age 22 mos., I warned them a few days ahead of time that we have to have a "binky party" and throw them away, then they get a prize. They do understand at this age what throw them away means. Anyway, yes, they did cry when it was time for naps and bedtime, but only for a couple of days, then they got used to being without it. I think letting them cry is fine. They'll get over it. You just have to be tough, and really throw them out so you don't cave and go get one. Good luck!
i think the pacifairy will work, it worked for my daughter at the age of 2. Never under estimate your child they understand and know more then we think. my daughter and i collected all the bottles, put them in a decorative bag went outside told her the whole story, and the next morning in the same bag or not was a gift for her kindness of giving them to other babies that really need them.. GOOD LUCK!!!!!!
my sister-in-law cut the tip off and her son just didn't want it anymore. I think it took him a few nights to get used to not having it.
It's not going to be easy either way- simplify the story, tell him that he's a big boy so you have to give his paci to a baby. Then make sure you have ALL of them, and throw them away (but don't let him see you throw them away). And be prepared not to give in. You've already set yourself up to have a difficult time, though, by giving in to his fits in the past. He knows that in the past when you said no he just had to throw a fit to get what he wanted, so he'll probably do it again. The only way to stop the behavior is to stick with it, and never NEVER give in to a tantrum for anything! I'm sorry, I'm just very hardcore. Tantrums have never flown in my house, not even when she was one and first tried them out.
He's not quite two, so maybe don't push it yet. But, you can start setting limits. Tell him that he's too old to have it except when sleeping. We had a dish that sat on a high dresser and they'd put the paci in the dish upon waking and retrieve it at bedtime. He'll probably outgrow it on his own. I think as the teeth start coming in, it's less comforting. With my oldest, we told her when they were gone, they were gone, there'd be no more. Eventually they all disappeared and she just accepted it. My son decided it was fun to flush them down the toilet (they didn't clog thank goodness). He flushed all but one and we told him that was it, and after a few days he flushed it too. That was it. They were both about 2. My youngest was a little harder, but we discovered she was holding it in her hand squeezing it more than she was sucking on it. She'd often have one in each hand. So, we replaced it with a squishy doll and took away the pacifier and she got over it very quickly. The first night is always the hardest, but they seem to get over it quickly.
I wanted to chime in on the pacifier discussion. Sleep related issues are always the hardest to resolve. We just want to sleep and not deal with screaming children at all hours of the night. I can tell you that I lost my resolve many-many-many times when I was trying to take away my first daughter's pacifier. I could get her to sleep without it o.k. but it was the 2 a.m. scream-fest that made me crumble. I am embarrased to say that she was a closet pacifier user until 4 years old. Finally, I got rid of it once and for all on a road trip. I kept preparing her that when we went on vacation, we weren't going to take any pacifiers. I figured the car motion would soothe her. My new baby had to go cold turkey because my oldest would've stolen hers. The most important thing I can tell you is to throw them away asap. Trust me - at 2 a.m. your resolve will waver and it is better to not have any within arm's reach.
Best of luck to you.
H.,
This is what I did for my daughter. I decided around 2ish that it was time to end the mimi love. :) I cut the tips of ALL her mimis. I had to do them all so I did not get sucked back into giving them to her. She was done to really only having them at naps. So, I cut it, she looked at it and cried for a while and told me her mimi was broken and she needed a new one. She tried sucking on the broken mimi a few times and decided she didn't like it. It took a couple days, but she gave it up.
Good luck!
Dear H., I am going to be doing the same thing soon with my son who turns 2 in august. Despite him not being able to talk a lot, I know that my son can understand a lot so I am going to try to do a "paci chart" with him. Maybe 1 week to 10 days I am going to cross off a day with him and then tell him that we are going to say by by to paci because he is getting to be a big boy. We'll see! Maybe something like that will prepare your son to say good-bye, too. I did this with my now 3 1/2 year old and he threw his paci away himself!! AM
H.-
I have 3 kids and have done all 3.
#1 cold turkey- 18 months or so sad a nite for a day or 2. We had alreay transitioned to a "baba- her small blankie" for night.
#2- Passy Fairy- 2 year old- trust me they get it especially if it something they really want- Also used a special blankie for night.
#3 - hole in the passy and then threw it a way when I told her it "passy doesn't work any more"- tears but she got over it.
Good luck-
My doctor had told me that he cut a small hole it the tip of it, and then his son didn't want it anymore since it didn't work. Good luck!
My kids never used pacifiers, but i know this trick works. Gather up all the pacifiers and snip a little off the tip. When he asks why it seems different play dumb. Every few days snip a little more off. It will get down to where there is so little on the pacifier he wont want to bother with it anymore. Make sure you do this to all the pacifiers.
Hey H.,
I totally know how you feel. My son is turning 2 on FRIDAY!! My Dr. gave me really good advice, and it worked. He said to cut the tips a little each week, and eventually your son will get rid of it on his own. They don't like the way it feels. So I started reducing paci time for only nap time, and bed time. I let that go on for like a month. THEN I cut the tips on all the paci's in the house so they would be the same, and he didn't like it from the get GO....POOF ...GONE. I told him it was broke. He never wanted it again. He did have a few crying spells, but I gave him a toy, and a blankie to soothe him. HOPE this helps. HANG IN there.
I cut the end off the pacifier when I was ready to take the silly thing away. My son only had his in the car and in the crib after one year. On their second birthdays, my kids put their pacifiers in the trash can (on the street) and said bye-bye to them.
Their teeth will go back. The dentist just told me that two weeks ago as I have a three year old that just got rid of it. He was absolutely NOT worried about binkies. The dentist said thumb sucking is the real culprit and affects their teeth long term. He said that if he starts thumb sucking to give the binky back. I couldn't believe it. What a relief!
I just had the binky fairy come for my three year old (same thing with my other son when he was three). I was worried it would not work this time around as this son was even more obsessed with it. We searched the whole house for all the binkies, put them in a bag and then left them in the mailbox. The next morning fairy dust was in the mailbox along with a note, toy and some gum to help with the oral fixation.
My son fell for it and only asked for it twice in the last few weeks. I will say that he has cried a lot more now and is barely napping since taking it away. Be prepared for a lot more extra crying and sleep not to be as good. You decide if it is worth the social stigma and temporary bite in their teeth.
I have found three to be a good number for me and my friends. Many of my friends kids had it too and I just didn't know because it wasn't allowed to leave the crib (you might try that) or wasn't allowed to leave the house. I found that at three it was a good age to take it away. They were ready, they could understand about the fairy, etc.
I know my advice would be ridiculed amongst many. Probably by people who have kids that didn't have one. Their kids probably have blankets, dolls, etc. so they don't know. Would those same people take their kids blankets away? Probably not.
The decision is yours. There is no easy way to do it.
H.,
Here is how I did it. At first I stopped offering it and I only gave it to my son when he asked for it. When the pacifier's started getting funky I had my son throw it away himself. This seemed to be ok with him and when he had gone through all of them he just didn't want it anymore. By the way my son was 1 when I did this so hopefully you won't have to many problems with your son understanding it. In short I think if you make it his idea it might make it easier to get rid of it. Also the other thing I did was at night when he had it and he would fall asleep I would take it out and he wouldn't have it in the morning and 9 times out of 10 he didn't even notice it. I hope some of these Ideas work for you!! Good luck!! Let me know how it goes!!
S. =)
Hey H.,
You answered your own question, put a hole in it and when the suction is gone he'll be the one that decides to throw it away!! Guess what, you'll be the goodie Mom and not always the bad guy!! Good Luck!!
I went cold turkey with my little guy. It took a coouple of cranky bedtimes but he got through it. He stopped asking for it after about four days.
Good luck
We had planned on waiting until my son turned 3 but the dentist told us at his 2 1/2 yr appointment we HAD to get rid of it immediately because my son had such an open bite. We had been only giving him the pacifier in the car and at nap or bed time but the damage had been done. We had a box, called the "binky box" where they went when he wasn't using them, it was in his closet where he couldn't reach it because he would have snuck them. Anyway, we told him the dentist saw the binky fairy flying over our house and it was her night to come to our house. We asked him what he wanted, a dinosaur and truck and my husband ran out to the toy store. We put all of the binkies in the box outside his door that night and he did fine, much due to being really excited about the toys to come. The next week or two was pretty tough at nap and bedtime but it did get easier. Another tip the dentist told us about was cutting the tip of the pacifier off and letting him have it and each night cut a bit more of until it is just a nub, he says it works and the kids kind of wean themselves. We didn't try this as we had already set the expectation that the binky fairy was coming. Good luck!
Gradual reduction is always easiest on everyone. We gradually reduced the amount of time they (my twins) had with the pacifier until they were only in the crib at night. Then one night we stayed late at friend's house and they went to bed without them. We never gave them back again, and it was not an issue -- We were probably really lucky.
Since your son is older, you can make him responsible for his pacifier. (Make sure there is only one in the house, no spares!) At some point, he will most certainly lose it. This might upset him, but if you act nonchalant about it and "help" him look for it, then he might be sad, but it won't be like you took it away from him.