Seeking Advice on How to Handle My Son's Behavior

I agree with what the other ladies said. IF that doesn't work, you may want to think of the old ways. I know MANY of you will think this might be horrible, but please remember the respect that children had for their parents and teachers up to about 20 years ago. Very important for children to respect others. I say what I think, it's just the way I am. So here go'es.

We had a big problem with my oldest son while in kindergarden. He was hitting the teacher and other children with his bookbag everyday. Each day she would send him home with a note. My husband sat him down and told him that hurting others was not nice. Everyday he came home with a note for hitting, he was going to get a taste of his own medicine. OK CALM DOWN! NOT A BEATING! NOT ABUCE! Just a little swap on the behind to show him how being hit hurt others. He knew what to expect and knew what was going to happen if he continued his behavior. He is 23 now and we have never had a problem with him since. All we had to do was give him "THE LOOK". If you don't know what that is, it is the expression on a parents face just before a child has gone too far.

As a result of these couple of days, he has always been a straight A student and is a very self asured young man of 23 today. He was hired by a computer company at 14, but the owner didn't know he saw only 14 and told him to come back as soon as he was 15. He has held the same job since he then and is going to college now. To top things off he has had his own computer repair business for a few years now and is doing very well for himself.

He is a very respectful young man. Has good manors, holds and opens doors for others, etc. He never uses bad language, even when he thinks he is alone. It is kind of funny to hear a 6' 2" man say "Oh shoot!" when something goes wrong.

I think you've been given great advice with the exception of confirming your use of the crib for time out. I love my bed. It's a safe-haven. I know it's an easy and safe place to put them but I strongly encourage you not to. You don't want him to start thinking about his bed in a negative way. Find another safe place for timeout or let him know his behavior has put him in a "mommy time-out" which means you're going to ignore him for 2 minutes. If nothing else it will give you time to take a deep breath (which my daugher does with me now so her episodes don't escalate to "tantrum" state) and figure out what to do next.

I also read another person's (in another post) suggestion to give hugs when you realize they're reaching the breaking point and I think that's a wonderful idea. This also reinforces that he might be angry with you but that you still love each other when you're mad and that's ok. After the hug he'll be in a better state to explain why he is angry with you.

Good luck!

It is common for a 2 1/2 yr old to act this way they dont have the words express their frustration. When my son or daughter have their little tantrums I have found that ignoring the tantrum works best. It teaches them that bad behavior wont get my attention or any response from me. After a time they realize that all this expended energy is getting them no where & the tantrums stop.

This is what I do with my kids & it seams to work. Good luck.

L. S

The Child I nanny for has the same problem. He doesnt listen and he get angry and throws tantrums alot. My suggestion is when he is out of hand ask him to get his favorite toy and then take that toy and put it up to where he can not get it and tell him that he will get it back if he starts calming down.. If that doesnt work I also suggest a 2 minute cool down time being he is only 2. I would put him in his crib and walk away and come back in 2 minutes and ask him if he is ready to calm down.Sometimes even putting him in the bath tub for quiet time helps.. I use that with my Nephew alot. the water takes his attention away from what is making him mad

well it's a lot easier to throw a fit and scream when you are 2 and 1/2...how do you feel when you get angry? remember your job is to teach him how to deal with it, not to stop it...emotions run the life of a toddler...kind of like kiddie meno pause...hot/cold...when your son gets mad....I would put him in his bed( not to add to the drama but you might want to move him to a be if you can before he climbs out, besides if he feels like a big boy it may help) and tell him he can get up when he feels better...you can explain to him that you understand he is angry and that's okay but it's not okay to throw toys or hit...I've done this with all of my kids and it works and they've even put themselves in "time out" when they've needed to calm down...it's cute watching your 2yr old putting himself in time out and it's a great lesson, stepping back...also teach him to take deep breathes...it really helps...good luck!

Is your child verbal enough to let you know why hes upset? If he doesn't he might be feeling very frustrated. Picture cards for chooses, or simple sign language signs will definetly help. Ff communication isn't of concern You should ask him to stop nicely but with a firm tone of voice and at the same time tell him he will get time out if he continues, if he continues sit him in time out for 2 mins. after time out let him know why you sat him there and give him a hug. Children need to learn that you are the parent and are in control. Give him lots of praise durning his great behavior especially when problem solving. Remember be consistent your yes's are yes and your no's are no. Good Luck.

Giving him a time out in his crib for 2 min each time his behavior is inapropriate is not a bad thing. It gives him time to settle down, explain to him why he has the time out when you put him in. After the time out talk to him about his behavior and ask for an appology. This will help him to learn to respect you and his things and set the ground work for things later. I have a 6 yr old and it has really helped lay a ground work for healthy punishment for the wrong behavior. Be strong and consistant and he'll get the picture and you will both be happier.