Purposely Hurting Himself

Honestly maybe its from the confusion of moving, siblings, etc. my twins 4.5 yrs old did the same thing and I don't know if it is a boy thing but they don't seem to as coordinated as my 9 yr old daughter. My mother in law said all 4 of her boys did it too. I wouldn't worry just yet. Just try to break him of the habit and if it doesn't work I'd ask a dr.s opion. They all have suggestions. Oh and my boys still do it, that and first fight. LOL. Hope that helps. You are not alone.
C.

My oldest son just turned 5 and he does this quite a bit and has from little up, but he is also autistic. I feel for you because it is not fun seeing your child do that, especially the tantrum that comes with it. Best thing to do right at that moment is to stay calm yourself, and talk calmly to him and in our situation I hug him tight and rock back and forth just sitting on the floor with him. This is what works for us right now.

We've also moved a few times with our boys and initially a move is very hard on children and the adjustment period to a new place sometimes takes a while. Which may also be the reason he is doing this.

On a seperate note...welcome to the Spooner area! I now live south of the Cities but I was born and raised there and still visit there a few times every month (still have lots of family and friends right in Spooner).

Hi D.,

The best article I have found about this is:

http://parentcenter.babycenter.com/refcap/preschooler/pbe...

My son also had gone through a phase of doing this. He was obviously doing his for attention because he was look at us after he banged his head on the wall.

Hope the article helps a bit,

M

My son does this too - he is now 16 months, and I can't remember when it started, probably when he started to walk/fall around 13 months. He usually does it even if he isn't crying after... I think he is testing.. "what happens when I"... fill in the blank here. He doesn't usually get too upset unless he really falls, in which case I am ususally right there so he doesn't have time to repeat the action.

Another thing I've noticed is if he accidentally bonks into me, either with a head to my face (which seems to happen all the time!) or whatever, he will repeat that action too, even though I tell him that it hurts me. I think again it is a testing thing, to see what happens when he does something.

I haven't worried about it much, but if you have concerns, I would talk to his Dr. about it at your next appointment.

J.

My mom ran a day care center for about 5 years, and I saw a good number of kids from all different backgrounds and personalities do this for one of two reasons. One was for the experience. Sure, it hurt but having their head or hand hurt was something new, so they did it again and again. It sounds strange, but my mom played a game with these kids called "Pinch." It also helped them learn body parts. They were told, "Pinch your foot. What does it feel like. Now pinch your cheek. What does it feel like? Is it different?" It helped them gain the sensory experience without the "oh my God, what are you doing?!?!" adult panic.
The second was for the comforting attention they got when they did. Generally, it was nothing to worry about. Extra attention at non-hurt times cured this in matter of days.
My little bunny isn't there yet, but I hope I could help.

Hi! My son does this still and he's almost two. I was real concerned at first because I know that can be something you think of in regards to your child being autistic. My son would hit his head alot and I came to find its because he couldn't talk yet, he would get upset and thats how he dealt with anger. Now that he talks more, he still does it but usually only when he is overtired and frustrated. If you are concerned that he really only does it for no reason and frustration is not involved, I would suggest mentioning it to your pediatrician. Good luck!

Does her bump his head and look at you? I think it's for attention. If you don't comfort him and ignore him as he does it maybe he'll stop because he's not getting the reaction he's trying to obtain. This is just my opinion and the only thing I can think of at this time as to why he's doing such things. By holding him and calming him I think you may be reinforcing the negative behavior that it's okay to hurt yourself because you'll get rewarded for doing so. The reward is having you console him. Good luck and if anything you can just call your doctor and get advice too :)

Sorry this took so long to respond. busy mom of 2. My son used to do that as well...it turned out he had sinus pressure that was relieved when he would bang his head on the wall or whatever was around. the junk in his head would loosen up and come gushing out of his nose giving him relief. unfortulately it took until he was 2 years old for doctors to figure out he had allergies to certain pollens that was causing it, but at lease you have an idea to start with. Good luck, this one is frustrating.

My son is now almost 11 years old, but I remember that he had a "head-banging" stage when he was about that age. Whenever he would get upset, angry, frustrated or any kind of emotions like that, he would bang his head on the floor repeatedly. I was extremely upset about this behavior and frightened that he would hurt himself. I would talk to many people and his pediatrician. I was told not to "feed" into the negative behavior, but remove him from the hard surface or put a pillow under him and let him have his tantrum. As long as we wasn't hurting himself. This was very difficult for me, but over time, I found it was just a stage and he eventually grew out of it. That was the only way he knew how to deal with his feelings, I guess. But, I feel for you. It was hard to go through at the time, but again, he eventually just quit, and if I remember right, by the time he was 2 or 3, it subsided completely.

My son is now 20 months old and he used to do this, it started with just throwing himself onto the ground, then walls, then anything he saw. I eventually just ignored it and when he would cry, I finally realized that it was just for me and not because he was hurt, I would tell him "well then don't do that". after about a month of that he stopped. now he just looks at me before he does it and I say, "You won't get a hug if you do that" (but you have to remember to not always think it's on purpose)

One possible source of the issue is that something is off in your son's cranial bones and hitting his head is his way of trying to get relief. If this is the issue (and again this is just a possible cause), it's easily remedied through someone who does Cranial Sacral work. Some chiropractors do this work or some people specialize in it. It's very gental hands on body work. Almost like a massage. I've had it done and can provide names of people if you wish.

Good Luck!

I have a 20 month old son who has done the same thing since around that age (maybe a little earlier). The only thing I've been able to figure out is that he's angry at whatever "bumped" him. He also launches toys if he trips over them or they drop on his foot, etc. Sometimes he will bang his head on the headboard or footboard of the crib when he doesn't want to go down for a nap or bed. As he gets older, he's been doing it less and less, and I have to admit that I'm less reactionary. I keep calm and explain to him that it's not the toy's or wall's fault, and that I won't feel sorry for him if he does it to himself. It's hard to not scoop him up, but if he gets the attention, he just keeps doing it. With the crib, if I leave the room, he stops banging his head on it. Hang in there. We just have passionate kids!

My son started head banging around that age (he is now 18 months old). He would bang his head against windows, the floor, books, our knees, basically anything. I have read that is a perfectly natural thing for children to do at this age. Just try not to make too big a deal of it. He has outgrown it already. Here is a link to an article about it. Hope this helps.
http://parentcenter.babycenter.com/refcap/preschooler/pbe...

I would try to give him a ton of attention when he's being good. And try and ignore him when he "hurts" himself. I'm wondering if there were any big changes in your household since he started doing that. New job, house, sibling, etc.. If you try that for about a month and it doesn't work, maybe ask your pediatrician if it's cause for concern. It doesn't sound like it though.