I know this question has been asked before, but what is the proper etiquette for having a second baby shower? My daughter was born in 06 and we are having another girl in March of 09. My friend (who wasn't around when the first one was born) wants to throw me a baby shower. We would really appreciate it since we have had some medical issues with my other daughter that have left us strapped for cash as I am no longer working. We don't need everything that we would have with the first one, of course, but there are still some things that we could use. I am not sure, however, how my mom and her side of the family will react. I think that they think that it's improper to have another baby shower unless it's been quite a few years since the first. Anyway, do you Moms know what is considered "proper" in this day and age? Any input would be great!
We are due in just a little while now, and have decided to forget about the second baby shower. We will have a small get together for lunch w/friends after she is born, no gifts necessary of course. More like a "meet and greet" than anything. Thanks for all your great responses!
I am due with my second baby and my SIL is throwing me a "baby lunch" but we aren't registering anywhere. I'm going to meet up with some girl friends and celebrate the baby. I am assuming if people want to buy us things for the baby they will do so at Christmas time, or even gift cards so we can get what we need.
I think a 2nd shower is tacky. With some exceptions like a huge gap in age difference, or going from a boy to a girl or twins etc.
Call it a "Sprinkle" to just add the few things you need.
I don't understand how some people buy brand new "everythings" for every baby that's really loading up our garbage dumps.
Maybe you could just have a friends shower. My sister in law just had a brunch with her friends, my mother-in-law and our other sister in law for her second shower. And my sister ended up having a shower for each of her three kids, #1 b.c it was #1, two years later #2 b/c it was boy, #3 b/c it had been 5 years since #2, but once again except for the first one it was mostly just friends and my mom and I no extented family.
I am actually hosting a second shower for one of my good friends in January, it has been over 5 years since she had her first baby so we are inviting her extented family too.
If you don't think that your extented family would approve then do it with out them, just have a simple get together with your friends.
Throw etiquette out the window for baby showers! If someone is willing to throw one for you than go ahead and enjoy!!! My friends and I threw a baby shower for a 5th baby and more than 30 people came who were willing to show baby and mom that they were loved.
If people are stingy enough to not want to shower a new life with gifts then they can stay home. Congrats on your new baby!
I have always believed that having a second baby shower is not appropriate. (yes, there are some circumstances... long wait between kids, or multiples). You could, (if you don't want a second shower) ask your friend to help you out when the baby comes; babysit your other one, make you a meal, help you clean. If you do want a shower and your friend will not take no for an answer...you could do a diaper/wipe or book shower...so that your family and friends don't feel like they are getting something you already have.
Who cares what your in-laws think. We're having our second girl in January. Our other daughter is 3 1/2. My friend is throwing me a diaper shower. Cause heaven know's we'll need em. Inviting about 10-12 people. That's a lot of diapers and it would help a great deal. Find a theme that you need. If you are using formula, then have a formula shower. If you're nursing, then have a breast pad shower. LOL - My friend did that and used every last one of those breast pads. Celebrate this baby like your other baby. These little beings are miracles. Mine tried to come at 21 weeks. I'm 35 weeks now and would love to have my girfriends celebrate that with me.
Also, maybe they can write notes to you saying how they can help you out. For example, "My gift to you will be to stop by and let you get 2 hours of sleep".
Trust me -second showers are not a waste. Every new baby needs SOMETHING.
Let us know how it goes!
Ann,
Dont call it a shower, call it a celebration for the new baby's birth. Perhaps have it after the baby is born and make it more of a reason to come see the baby and visit with everyone. Yes, you dont need a full on shower, but every baby deserves a celebration.
Every baby should be celebrated... so maybe have your friend call it a baby celebration, and maybe not go over board on baby games. Everyone is invited, no gift necessary since we have a majority of the items needed but if you feel inclined to bring a gift we are registired at such in such place. Then maybe have simple items like diapers, bottles, breastmilk bags and so on... things that everyone knows you need for EVER baby.
In mine and my friends' opinions, every baby should be celebrated. If you don't really need anything, you could have a diaper shower or something like that. I don't think it's inappropriate at all! One of my friends is expecting her 4th boy, and I plan on offering to throw her a shower, even if it ends up being more about having fun and celebrating than providing necessities.
I'm due with #2 in March too! Congrats!
I'm having a Mother Blessing instead (these are also erroneously called Blessingway ceremonies, which are like calling any time you eat bread with wine "communion" - I'm just telling you this so you know what to google). I have a registry if people ask, but the party is about supporting me - eating good food, doing henna on my belly, making a labor/nursing necklace, coming up with birth affirmations and sharing stories of birth and mothering with friends. There won't be gifts at the party. I just looked through some other threads here asking this question and it seems no one's brought this up as an alternative. so.
I threw one for a friend a few years ago and it was really meaningful.
