Not When, but SHOULD We Have Another Child

Do you get excited when you think about having another? If you do, even a little, I think you should do it.

I say go for it! My kids are almost 3 and 8 months and they love each other! I personally haven't found it to be any more work than one, just takes a little longer to get out of the house. I am an only child and would have loved a sibling.

You are reading my mind! I have been going through the same thing, only my husband is an only and doesn't think we need to have another. It's a lot of work managing a family and kids and do I want to put my body through it again? I don't want to be selfish about it though. we both come from smaller families and I think it would be nice for him to have someone when we are gone. Mine is 14 months as well and I said if we do decide, it would be in another year so he is a little more independent when the new baby would come. I am 34 and my husband is 35 so we are getting close to "the ages of concern" as well. I think we'll make the decision when it is time. I have talked to my doctor and she told me there is no rush to decide. She's not concerned. I'm not really worried about what other people think. I am trying to think of what would be best for my child.

I am in a similar situation. I'm in my 30's, my husband is in his early 50's, and our son is 14 months old. We had planned to have at least 2, maybe 3 kids, but now I'm not so sure.

I really feel fulfilled with my son. I don't have a longing to have additional children right now. I know that could change, but because of my husband's age, I feel the need to make this decision in the next year or two.

My son is happy and healthy, and has been a very easy child to take care of. We really lucked out. I fear that our next child might be unhealthy or colicky or just plain a handful. I have no idea how I would take care of 2 kids. I can't imagine running errands with 2 kids, or trying to travel, or anything like that.

I haven't been much help, but maybe I'm just trying to say, "You're not alone".

One argument I would toss out is that your son will be better off with a sibling. There is no guarantee that siblings will get along or even like each other. I have a total of 5 half and step siblings, and I'm only close to 1 of them. One I am actually estranged from, and the other 3, I see like twice a year. My husband gets along with his 2 siblings, but they live nowhere near us, and we have little contact with them.

I am a huge believer in "every child a wanted child". If you are ultimately ambivalent or indecisive, I think the right answer is then "no".

When trying to decide, just figure out if you want another child or not. Try not to think about the economy, timing, jobs money, ect... No time is ever going to be PERFECT! If you are meant to have another child you will!

I truly believe that you cannot and should not include anyone's but yours and your husband's opinion of whether or not you should have more children. It is a major decision to make! You need to analyze your own situation with your husband without anyone else's input and make the decision in regards to what is best for you.

The economy is just a fluctuating thing, noone can control that, and I don't think it should be a factor. AFter all, you have one child and you will figure out a way to make it with him, you would with another child, too. I am making it with 6 and my husband unemployed for 4 months, without unemployment or assistance. You CAN do it.

The economy will change for the better one day, but your time to have a baby could be over then. Money shouldn't be a factor to having a baby. (most of the time) You can't predict the future.

You WILL NOT regret having a baby, but will you regret not having one?

You might regret not having that second child but I've never heard anyone say they regretted having one of their children.

I would agree with what the other moms said. Don't think too much about it. Another baby is always a blessing. The financial stuff will work itself out. You wouldn't believe what my husband and I have been through in the past year. NOt once did I regret any of my children. We have three under the age of four. As they grow and develop into their own personalities, it makes me happier each day. They thrive off of each other and I appreciate that they have each other. They are each a blessing in their own way. Have faith that it will all work out the way it is supposed to for you and your family.

Hi C.,

The choice is definitely you and your husband's...don't let others push you into something you don't really want. I will tell you though that I know a lot of people question having another one after they get their first child. I love children...they are my life, but my husband and I both had many questions before we decided to have #2. We wouldn't give up either one, and we enjoy each of them immensely. Take your time, and do what you think is best for you.

C.

C. -- I would say to you an almost unqualified YES. I am now 38 and my husband 40 and we had our second just a year ago. There is still plenty of time. My husband is 3rd of 4 boys and I see how wonderful it is for our girls to have aunts, uncles and cousins. I am like you -- the late baby by nine years. I see my two girls together (ages 4 and 1 now) and it gives me serious pangs to think what it would have been like to grow up with a "real" sibling. There is just no comparison. I think it has also been good for the older one's development not to have all of the attention. I would also say that as my siblings and I have become adults, it has been even more important for me to have them, even though they are much older. Both of our parents died by the time I was 32, and having someone to share the memories and grief with was immeasurably important to me. I really think this is one of the most important gifts you can give to your current child. E-mail me directly if you would like to ask more questions.

My husband just turned 42 this year, and I am 34. We are self-employed too. We just had our second child, because we wanted two children. I think the important thing to ask yourselves is, do you both want another child? Financially, where there is a will, there is a way. Take away the concern about the economy, and feeling like you owe your son a sibling, and focus on whether or not you two want another. The other two issues are a minor part of the equation.

Just remember that it is a choice, that you and your husband have to decide. Don't worry about what others say, if I did I wouldn't have my girls, everyone told me I had my hands full with my disabled son, but I always wanted him to have at least one sibling well we ended up with twins.

M.

I am not sure if this will help you or not, but I was in a similar predicament when my first child was 3 years old. My husband and I decided we were not going to have any more children, we were very happy with how things were. But suddenly the desire to have one more struck me (literally it was very sudden) and it was all I could think about. My husband was not at all thrilled about this idea and was convinced that I was letting other people tell me what we should do rather than focusing on what was best for us. He almost had me convinced, that is how much he believed it. Long story short, we ended up having another child and I could not be happier. I am so glad we gave my older daughter a baby sister and we are so happy. I feel a sense of completeness that I never felt before. I don't know if this will help you or not, but thought I would share.

there are issues with having any number of children. what is important is that if you have more it's because you want to. not because what others say.

finances are most assuredly a part of family making decisions. i actually wanted 6 children. was young and had perfectly easy pregnancies and deliveries and sooooo wanted a house full. -- but.... my stress level of having a husband off at war while having a newborn and 2 yr old and living 3k miles from home made me rethink.

after alot of prayers and getting advice from everywhere i could i had to make the final decision. i knew i did not want my husband to ever feel he couldnt leave the military or quit travel because we couldnt afford for him to have a regular job. we both wanted me to be able to always be a stay at home mom. well that is hard to do now days. we sacrificed alot to make it happen.

i ultimately decided to stop at 2 children because of those things. it ws the hardest decision i have ever had to make.
i even had a tubal to make sure i didnt go back on my decision. i cried alot and went through baby blues many times. i know i would have broken and had more kids if i didnt have the tubal.

i am now almost 44. my kids are 21 and 19. i have never been sorry for my decision. sad alot yes, sorry no.

you will make the right choice for you so long as you two make it together.

good luck and God bless
kel :)

Your definately over thinking it. Only you can make that decision. Make your decision though, and stick with it, because you'll never be able to be happy if your always second guessing yourself. Your not that old so you could always wait a year and then decide.

C., this is a personal decision. If you only want one, only have one. There are plenty of well-adjusted only children in the world. Don't have one only because you think you should. On the other hand, things always have a way of working themselves out, try not to stress too much. We stressed over having a second and it has worked out for us.

From my experiance.. if your already having the urge to have another one I think it'll only become a stronger urge over time especially when your 14mo. old becomes a preschooler, then school age you may go into complete baby fever. I sorta went through this because my first marriage didn't work and I had an only child for awhile. I have 2 kids that are 7 years apart. But in the meantime I was in mad baby fever, I kept saying having an only child was just fine but deep inside me I longed for one more. I finally met a great guy and had my 2nd child. With you having endome. I'd get a move on it and start planning for #2 as it sounds like that's what you long for.

Hi C. - I have been thinking the same thing over and over in my head...I am curious about your responses...would you ever consider emailing me what you have heard??? We, too, have a wonderful 14 month old, I am 36 and my hubby is 41...been thinking about this a lot lately. My home email is ____@____.com

Thanks so much, I hope you get good responses!!!

Hi C.
I can understand your concern regarding whether to have another child at this time. I am a mother of four sons. Our youngest was born when I was 38 yrs old.

Given that you began your motherhood when you were 37 yrs old you may choose to have Baby #2 sooner rather than later. The older your are when you are pregnant, the higher the risk of birth defects. If you feel that you and your husband are lovingly ready to welcome another bundle of joy into your family, by all means, do so. With that said, you can expect that another family member will have an impact on your finances. Our youngest son was unexpected at a time that I was already planning the next phase of my life. We also were very concerned regarding financial issues and the health of our new little one, but to our enjoyment, our son was born healthy and our finances have adjusted just fine. I do have to watch that I stick more closely to our new budget, but it's a joy that neither one of us would ever regret! :)

Best Wishes!

I think you need to be honest with yourself.... you commented that you think the answer is that you don't want another, but you feel like you should. I feel like I'm in the same boat. I'm just shy of 37, my husband is 46 and we have an almost 3 year old. My husband has 2 older kids, but essentially our daughter is an only child - she rarely sees her half siblings.

Honestly, I feel complete with one child - but I feel other people make me sometimes feel that I'm doing a disservice to her because she won't have a sibling close.

Listen to your heart.

Trust God. He's in control anyway. If He thinks you should have another child, he'll bless you and then pray he helps you figure out the details. If it's not right, you won't get pregnant again and you'll know that's right for your family.

I'm a mother of, soon to be, 3 under 2.5 years. This was not my plan, but God has taken care of us and I trust him fully. Hope you can find that trust...

A.

I don't know you at all but I would still vote to have a 2nd. I guess my thought is that though in the short term, money and patience will be stretched by two little ones, in the long term -- It pays off. They hopefully end up being best friends, they play sports together, they bring their children over for holidays...

Hi C.,
Sounds like either decision will be fine. We have an only, he's 14. I was an only like you, due to a sister almost 8 years older. At 37, if you aren't feeling desperate for a 2nd child I'd say wait. Many women have done just fine having a baby at age 40. Oh, and I was 36 when we had our son.
Blessings,
S.
PS: There are no SHOULD's, it's you and your husband's decision only.
homeschool mom and successful home business owner

i agree with others that you will not regret another child but you might regret not having one. i am an only child from divorced parents and begged my mom and dad to get back together so i could have a sibling. i wanted my daughter to have a sibling when she is older as i still wish i had one. i was 36 for my 2nd pregnancy and we ended up with fraternal twins. it was the best decision i ever made. my kids have live in playmates and our family is complete. money is tight but we know the God will always provide and our house is so full of laughter and love.

If you don't want another one- the answer is clear don't have another. This is totally up to you and your husband to make this decision. Other people telling you that you should and you listening would be rediculous. Think about the fact that you are saying that you really don't want another one. You could wind up resenting that child in the long run and how would that be fair to the child or even it's brother. If you don't want your child to be alone put him in play groups, have him close with other family members.

I was 37 when I had my last child and there's a 20 year age gap between my oldest and youngest, so in a way, she is being raised an only child. We have lots of issues because it's hard to find play dates for her, outside of her school contacts. So that is one thing to consider. Another is, and I think about this alot, being an older parent inevitably means we will "go" when our kids are younger in age. Well compared to people who have kids in their 20's. You might want to consider a second child so they will have someone close to lean on when you and your husband are no longer here. I know that's a gloomy thing to think about, but after all, it is a fact of life. If my youngest would have been my first child at age 37, I definitely would have had one more.

Why not take a "vacation" from the topic - put it out of your mind/stop talking about it for 6 months and see how you feel after having some time away from the obsession of the topic. In the end, it really comes down to what you and your husbands feelings are on the topic.

As for your age, I highly disagree that anyone at 37 or 40 for that matter is an "older parent". My mother had me at the age of 46 - back in the 70s when that kind of thing was unheard of. My parents who are now in their late 70s, early 80s may not have been the "fun" parents to have, but did a wonderful job.

My parents having me late in life (14 years after my brother) also made me basically an "only child". As an only child I didn't know any different and loved my childhood. Today, as a parent of a 17 month old, I have decided would perfer my son to have a sibling closer in age so he can enjoy that relationship his entrie life (something I never had, but my husband did)- but that was a decision my husband & i made for our family.

Whatever decision you make is the right one for you. Good luck.

If you're unsure, don't have another child. I have two children (ages 19 months and 3 months), and I have found that two kids is not twice as much work. It is five times as much work!
However, it also five times as much fun! Seeing the two of them interacting already at this young age is fun. My youngest lights up when my older one comes in the room and plays with him. My older child is learning to be a great "helper"...handing me burp rags, putting dirty bottles in the sink. And I think they will benefit from having a sibling.
In short, I am exhausted, but happy with my two kids. You really need to be ready to put in the extra time for two if you're going to do it.
Good luck with your decision!

C.,

My husband and I have four children...I wish I had had one more. We are in our late 40's and it is too late. You will never regret having another child. If you are that conflicted with having another one, it would seem to me that you should. Again, you will never regret having one more child.

Blessings,
C.

C.,

This is such a personal decision, but I have had this conversation with a couple of friends. I will tell you that for me - my life finally felt complete after my second was born. The pregnancy was physically hard on me - but much easier emotionally. I knew what to expect. I just loved everything a little bit more the second time around - I wasn't so nervous and really just felt like I knew what I was doing much more than the first time around. It was and still is amazing to see how my two children interact with each other. They love each other so much - I wouldn't trade that for anything. It is more work - I will not lie about that. But it is so much easier than what I thought it would be. You should not feel guilty for whatever decision you make. You know what is best for your family and you need to allow yourself to be at peace with whatever you decide. Don't let other's negative thoughts and feedback make you feel guilty for doing what's best for you.

Good Luck,
M.

When I was 53, my much younger husband and I adopted two special needs children (born addicted and both have ADD). I have 3 grown children already. You might want to consider adoption. There is financial help that comes with adoption and somebody else has done the hard part! The kids are bright and funny and normal. They have medical assistance since they are adopted, and we have primary insurance, with the MA as the secondary. I wish this was available for everybody! You don't have to make a decision yet.

You still have a few years before the big 4-0, so I wouldn't worry about it right now. Your son is still very young. Enjoy him, and if the urge comes, think about another one then. If the urge doesn't come, then one is the perfect number for you. Your son will only know what it is like in the family he has. He may wish for a sibling. He may be glad not to have one. Who knows? Who says he'd like the sibling he might get? The odds are the same of his being happy whether or not he has a sib. As for people asking, "When are you going to have number two?" I would respond something like, "We're doing our part. The rest is in God's hands." It shuts people up every time.

C.,
It sounds like you're definitely getting caught up in the details (your age, whether having a sibling is "right" or not, etc). I think it's so easy to obsess about things like this. If you can try to decide what it is you and your husband really want - how you FEEL about it... Maybe try doing some free writing and just see what comes.
Don't worry about what others think - this is your family and your life.
I hope this is helpful.
Good luck and congrats on your son!

First of all, I think that this is primarily a decision between your husband and yourself. My thought when I read this was that only children are sometimes a little socially awkward among their peers. They spend so much time with mom and dad that they become little adults. My husband is older 47 and we have three under 3. My second thought was that since you are older, it would probably be nice for your baby to have a brother/sister if God forbid your life is not as long as you would like it to be.

And as far as how much work the second baby is, I thought the second one was a breeze. Now a third one, was too much for me. But you are already doing baby things, one more is not bad, you have two arms, room for two babies on your lap, and the second one truly is not that much more expensive.

With all this being said, I am biased towards siblings and not having a singleton, and I am sure that there are several moms who have only one by choice that will tell you how great that is too, so ultimately this is 100% you and your husband's choice.

Don't evaluate this decision considering what you SHOULD do, but what you WANT to do. Either decision will be fine for your family, so go with what your heart tells you. I've known many happy, well-adjusted "only" children and can also say that my two children are best friends and adore having a live in playmate.

My Vote- Have a baby. Baby #2 isn't nearly as expensive because you have all the biggies and toys, etc.... if they happen to be the same sex, you get handme downs. I know only children can be happy and well adjusted, but a sibling is a wonderful gift to give your child.

Do what YOU and your husband want and dont worry about everyone else!

While I am quite a bit younger than you I can relate. My husband and I had our daughter in June 2007 and are expecting number two. However, number two wasn't planned. Despite birth control, here we go again. Some would decide this is divine intervention or karma, etc. but I'm thinking it was just failed birth control. So the decision was made for us. That being said, prior to this pregnancy I was also trying to "figure it out." It is almost like I felt like I needed to just get it over with so I could move on with other things in my life (an no this doesn't make me horrible just honest). The only advice I can give is to think long and hard about raising a child from birth well into adulthood. Does this fill you with dread or happiness? Be honest with yourself. Disregard what everyone is telling you to do. It is your body that will go through the process of having a baby and it will be you who is obligated to care for the child so it is your choice. There is nothing wrong with having one child just like there is nothing wrong with having more than one. Personally my husband and I thought hey, another kid will be fun. Hard work but fun. Also, don't have a child for your son. Your first child may not like his sibling. It happens often. It sounds to me like you want another child but perhaps your husband isn't 100% on board (which was the case with us). Which makes sense. Men think money, women think nurture.

as a mother of four , i always told my kids if you can you should never raise a child by them self, i came from a large family and some of my siblings had only one child and they know regret it, as my children have each other if something were to happen to us, there is only 5 years between our oldest and youngest, i feel the closer the children are the less the get self centered.My children are very close even know , they're living in different towns. yes you may have to cut corners but not always.i have have never regret having them close and having four, it was hard at times but will worth it. TdH

C., I have two kids, 25 months apart, now ages 3 and 1. I felt some of the trepidation you speak of, before we went ahead with #2. For the most part though, I knew I really wanted two. It's the sibling thing, I really wanted my son to have someone to grow up with. I grew up with a younger sister, we were 27 months apart, and can't imagine life without her. We were always best friends and even when we fought it never lasted long. As an adult I'm still so glad I have her, especially as our parents age. It's nice to know I have someone to make decisions with. Two kids are more work, and require more money, but I wouldn't change a thing. I hope this helps!

Hi, C.-

I am right there with ya. I just turned 39 in February, and my husband will be 39 in May. We have an 18 month old daughter, and are expecting our second daughter in less than a month. We have only been married for 3 years, as we reconnected 6 years ago. (We had been high school friends, and married other people.) He has 2 kids from his first marriage (15 and 18), and I have one (20).

I never meant for my first daughter to grow up without siblings, and had always wanted more kids, but it didn't work out that way. When I began dating my current husband I made it very clear that I was looking to have more children -at least 2 because I didn't want to raise any more as only children. He was on board right away. Now I'm wondering if I want to have one more. But I worry about the financial aspect, as well as our age. I'd be in my early 40's by the time I got pregnant again. I'm not sure I want to do that. The risk of abnormalities increases, and that frightens me, too.

On the other hand, three seems like fun. And I love the thought of a big family. I love being a SAHM and watching my children grow, teaching them things, sharing my time with them. And raising an only child wasn't completely horrible, either. I was able to devote ALL of my time and attention to her and only her. As a result, we are very close. I wouldn't trade that experience for anything, even though it wasn't what I wanted for her at the time.

Bottom line: I can't tell you (no one can) whether or not you SHOULD have any more. Only you can decide. I would just suggest trying to put it to the side for now. Enjoy your little boy a while longer, and eventually, the answer is going to come to you. I realize it won't ever be far from your mind, but try to remind yourself that there is no pressure. If it's meant to be; it will be. You will either come to the conclusion that you've just got to have a sibling for your little boy to share his childhood with, or you will decide that things are perfectly fine as they are. Either way, there is still time.

Good luck!

I'll make this short and sweet. If you have a desire to have another baby, I would say to go for it. If it's not meant to happen, it won't. You will never regret having another child but you may regret or wonder "what if" if you don't. I'm 38 and pregnant right now and my other 2 children are so excited about their new brother or sister that it makes it even more special for us. Don't feel bad about overthinking it.. maybe you are not quite ready with your son being pretty young still. A few months to a year can make a big difference in how you feel and where your son is at developmentally. Good luck whatever you decide.

Hi Tracy,

I know it's a hard answer, when you want an easy answer, but like others have said, it's really a choice you alone (with your husband's input, of course) have to make.

My daughter (she'll be 9 in April) is an only. I never wanted an only child--I grew up with siblings, and just think all children should have at least one--but there were a number of factors that went into our decision to stop with one. They included: 1) my health, which was very bad when she was born and isn't much better all these years later; 2) our daughter's health (we knew there was something unique about her when she was a baby, and by age two we knew for sure, but it wasn't until she was 5 that we learned she has Sensory Processing Disorder); 3) my desire for a writing career, which is an arduous pursuit; 4) my husband's desire to pursue Civil War Reenacting as his hobby, which takes him away for many weekends in the summer, making me a single parent; 5) the fact we were both older when we met (late 20s/early 30s) and were already set in our ways/our hobbies; 6) the fact we could give our daughter more of ourselves, our time, and opportunties; 7) the fact my husband has anxiety and OCD (Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder)--which he's given to our daughter--and it's a challenge living with one person who has it, much less two!; 8) the myriad of doctor appts my daughter has to attend (specialists, OT/PT, speech, etc.); 9) the fact my daughter and I might very well have a metabolic/digestive problem, which we're still testing for, that I don't want to pass on to another child; 10) economics also played a factor, because we decided that there was no way I could remain working outside the home when she started school. Too many dr appts, too many days off school/school calendar, what to do during summer break?, she was sick a lot (missed school days), and dealing with her SPD requires extra time and patience. I would have been hard-pressed to have not gotten fired from my job anyway, given how much time I would have missed from work (my husband travels for his job). So we live off his income and I am a freelance editor, working from home, bringing in a little discrestionary income; 11) about half of the family friends we have and friends she's made in school are only children as well, so she has plenty of friends who are like her--without siblings. This has helped her not feel "different."; 12) I had a difficult last trimester of pregnancy and suffered from preeclampsia, as well as post-partum depression after delivery, and didn't want to go through a hallowing, high risk pregancy again (I have high blood pressure); and 13) the fact she has two cousins in the family who are also only children has helped.

Of course, your reasons for having/not having another child will be tailored to your own wants and needs, as well as necessities. Since my daughter takes even more of "me" than most children do of their mothers, given her special needs, I felt that having any more children would severely tax my reserves and leave me absolutely no time for ME. And you need to leave time for yourself as well; it's natural, it's healthy, to give and allow yourself time to unwind, destress, and pamper yourself. Don't overextend yourself to the point where you're sick and unable to enjoy the children you have because you've overreached your own boundaries. I see a lot of this these days with parents. They look so burned out, taking care of their children, that they don't even look like they enjoy their children. Children can sense things; you don't want to give them a reason to feel they're unwanted.

All in all, make a list of the pros and cons for having more children, have a heart-to-heart talk with your husband, and remain firm in your decision and realize this is your life--it's your decision as to how many children you have. Your child will understand if you decide he will be an only. My daughter wanted a sibling really bad, but understood once we explained how sick I was and that we were lucky to have HER. We've invited a cat and a dog into our family, and for her, they are her brother and sister. And she's content with that. As are my husband and me. :)

Good luck in your decision.

Hi C.,

Wow, can I relate!

I am a blessed mother of Kody 13, Karlie 11, Kallie 7, Kaeden 5, and Kameron 2 -- and by the way I'm 42 and due in 19 more days with Kelsie Mae or Kelsey Joseph!

During this pregnancy I have been really strugling with whether it's time to step in and "help" God out so we don't have any more children -- I've been strugling most with the idea of "fixing" my husband - like I could do a better job than what God did.

As far at the economy goes, maybe your son or daughter will be the one who discovers a cure for our economic issues - and truly going from one to two (or six for that matter) didn't seem to be that big of a stretch.

When it comes to making a "happier" little boy by adding a sibling - all of my children totally celebrate when they find out there's another one coming, but I also have a brother with just one son - he likes to visit, but he sure wouldn't want to live here!

My best advice is lift it up, with your husband by your side, and pray about it. Between Karlie and Kallie I prayed for almost four months with no answer. When I finally went to my husband and asked him to pray with me, he got an answer within 24 hours. Be ok with with answer and God will make it clear.

Blessings

I agree with the posters who say you have time to wait a little longer for the dust to settle and feel that "knowing," one way or another (I had my first and only child when I was 41). I also agree with the woman who wrote that if you're not meant to have another baby, you won't (and if that were the case, it might be because of your son's karma/needs, not your own!). Anyway, I'd add the following -- don't have a sibling for your son; there are no guarantees that he'll bond with him/her, or stay close or whatever into adulthood. If you and your husband both feel a calling to parent another little one, that's a different story. Don't do it "for your son," do it if your hearts are both open to nurturing, guiding and loving another child as its parents.

I really wanted my first son to have a sibling, and boy #2 came almost 2years later; they are best friends and play really well together...I hope they will always be so close!! At 2 and 4 they play together almost all day and really give me a lot of time to get stuff done! Just one more perk!

There is no way you are "overthinking" this! I wish everyone would "overthink" having more children. There would be so many less unwanted and abused children in the World if everyone thought about it before they conceived! You sound to me that you are a wonderful mother by wanting to provide a financially secure and loving home to any children that you may or may not have. All I can say is go with your gut! If your gut instinct is to have another child then have one, but if you have doubts then don't. You'll figure it out, smart lady that you are! And for all those people that are telling you you should, let THEM have another one, if they can!!
Good luck and God Bless.

My sister came to me with a question like this and I really thought about it. What it came down to is that I would not want to go through life without a sister, so I told her I thought she should have two kids. But I agree, it's really up to whether you want another child.

Personally, I think it helps to try to imagine yourself in both scenarios (one child or two) and see what feels better.

There is an excellent article on this in April's Parents magazine. Basically, what it boiled down to, is when you're done, you know it. If you are having second thoughts about pulling the plug, so to speak, you might not be done.
I have never heard a parent say, "I wish I never had so-and-so." I HAVE heard, "I wish I could have/would have had one more." Having children is an incredibly personal decision that no one else (besides your husband, of course) should influence. You just need to decide what would be a bigger regret for YOU in the end?