My Two Year Old Refuses to Sleep in Her Own Bed

I recently went throught the same thing with my 3 yr old daughter while I was pregnant with our 2nd child. We had done some of the same things, let the child sleep with us hopeing that it was just a stage she was going through. However, 3 weeks later she was still sleeping with us and throwing awful fits with us. She had slept in her bed since she was a baby never sleeping with us. We couldn't figure out how to get her back into her bed, then our peditrician gave us some advice, i love my peditrician. He told us to not let her sleep with us, to make a pallet beside our bed and make her sleep there. He said that she would eventually decide to go back to her bed. It took about a month of her sleeping on the pallet in the floor to move back to her bed. She was 2 when she went through all this and I was pregnant. I think a lot had to do with the 2nd child and her not knowing what it meant and not understanding why mommy couldn't carry her around anymore.

I hope that this information helps you like it did me.

I have a 3 1/2 year old and a 21-month old. Our son starting coming into our room at night after we put him in a toddler bed just before he turned 2 (and his sister was due in a few months). We got all kinds of advice about how to get him to stay in his own bed and people we talked to were split about 50-50 on whether we should allow it. But the "best" advice was from the person who told us that "in 20 years, you'll miss the sound of little feet running down the hall." So the rule in our house is that you have to start the night in your own bed (they usually go to bed by 7:30), but if you wake up in the middle of the night, you can get in bed with Mommy and Daddy. We have a queen bed and sometimes it's pretty crowded by morning if both kids end up with us, but at least we get some "alone" time to start the night and sometimes we get the bed to ourselves all night long. And it's a lot easier on me than listening to someone cry for an hour or so because he/she doesn't want to go back to sleep alone!

I have a few suggestions. You could try laying with her in her own bed and seeing how that works. Letting her stay in your bed and purchasing a co-sleeper for the baby which would pull right up to your bed, but doesn't take up much space. Give in and get a bigger bed and make it a family bed for now. Or transition her to her own bed by laying down with her there and telling her if she sleeps in her "big girl" bed for ? many nights then she's gets one night in mommy's bed. Hope you find the right solution. Just keep in mind you don't want her to fill like she's being pushed away because of the baby. GOOD LUCK

Wow...I remember when I had to get my son to move into his own bed. My husband worked nights also, and it was just easier to grab my son and go pile in my bed. Well when my husband switched to the day shift, our bed became too crowded too quickly. So I started a bedtime ritual, we brushed teeth at 7:30 and got into his bed. We read a night time story and laid down to go to sleep. I would sing to him and pull him up against my chest. Like another mom said, there were several nights I would wake up at 10 o'clock still in his bed. If he woke up at night and came into my room, I never allowed him to crawl into my bed. I would get up, take him back to his bed and lay back down with him. It took several months, but eventually he would fall asleep at night faster, and got out of his bed less. After about 6 months I was able to tuck him in at night and just leave him there alone and he would stay there until the next morning. Just be persistant and patient, it will become easier. Just be sure to give your daughter plenty of attention now and after the new addition. It will be hard for the first few months, but she will need that reassurance. When my second was born, my oldest regressed in some situations, and we had to teach him how to be a big boy again. Hope something I said helps, good luck and congrats on the new addition.

She wants your attention and love and I love it because she's strong willed. She is going to be a leader in her class. You just wait and see. Give her lots of love and she will only be a more secure child. I would lay down with all of my children and say our prayers until they fell asleep and eventually they did it by themselves. Just remember, however you treat them is exactly the way they are going to treat their children and others. You need a king size bed so you'll have room for everyone. Ha!
Believe me, they don't want to sleep with you when they get older, they just feel more secure now. Good Luck!

Boy, was I in the same situation a few months ago! I have a 2 yr old son and a 4 mo old son. I happily coslept with the oldest. Never did get tired of it. It broke my heart to have to move him to his own bed. But he now sleeps on a full size bed in his own room. We lay down with him till he falls asleep. If he wakes up (which he does sometimes, nightmares, you know) we crawl in with him again. Or him with us, whichever. The little baby is right by my side, though, not where his toddler brother can reach him. We have a queen-size bed and I'd love a king-size but that wasn't in the budget. We do have a cosleeper and that makes for some more space. I used to be embarrased about sleeping with my little ones, but I decided it was everyone else's issue, not mine. They're only small for a very little while. It doesn't seem like anyone so vulnerable and defenseless should be left alone in the dark for hours on end. I hate sleeping alone and I'm an adult!

You may want to try laying down with your daughter in her bed instead of yours. When my oldest daughter was her age I had to lay down with her for a few minutes (10-20 mins) so she would fall asleep in her own bed. I put a time limit on it and told her what it was so she'd have fair warning. Beware though, you may wake up an hour later because you've fallen asleep in her bed. :) Obviously, the sooner you can establish her sleeping in her bed the better. Then she won't feel like she's getting kicked out of your bed because of the baby. Good luck with your daughter and your new baby to be!

Wow, I was in your exact situation just a few months ago.. I have a 3 year old and a 1 year old. My three year old still wont go to sleep on her on- but atleast now she wants to sleep in her bed- what we did was spent a day cleaning and rearranging her room into a "big girl" room. I still lay down with her but now she wants to lay in her big girl bed. My husband worked nights too and it was so much easier to just have her in bed with me than to try to fight it- then with the second baby that was impossible... unfortunetly our 1 year old now sleeps in bed with us.... so the cycle begins again! I've all but given up on ever having a bed to myself again! But then again, they are only little once. So enjoy every minute of it.

You really should have nipped this in the behind at the beginning. Now that what is done is done, you are going to have a hard road ahead. There are two things you can do. One is to continue to let her sleep with you, which i am sure you are getting pretty tired of or, you can continue to put her in her bed and let her tire herself to sleep. try using a night light or giving her something of yours that you use, like a pillow you sleep on. the scent will actually help. Persistence is the key. It will take time but, she should come around. And when she does get up in the middle of the night, take her by the hand and walk her back to bed without saying a word. You might have to do this many times in one night but, I promise that it will get less and less each time. Also, do not expect miracles on the first or even third night. Good Luck