My 5-year old daughter doesn’t listen to me. I don’t know why, she will turn a deaf ear to me each time I am talking to her (her hearing is no problem). For example, one day I told him to put on her shoes because we would go out. But she sat on the carpet at the door playing on her own, and just began to wear her shoes when I was ready to lock the door. I didn’t know what she’s thinking.
Next time that happens, softly but firmly say, "I see a little girl who needs to put her shoes on right now." I read this tip the other day in an old Parents magazine at my doctor's office. I have no idea why it works, but it worked with my 34 month old, very strong-willed child.
This may sound mean but my daughter would take her time and not listen as well. One day I told her I was leaving her there by herself if she didn't hurry up. Sure enough she took her time so I said that's it I'm leaving. I went in the garage and started the car. She opened the door crying don't leave me. Of course I wasn't going to leave her but it got the message across. Now if I threaten too leave her she gets a move on now.
I just read 1-2-3- Magic by Thomas Phelan. Excellent practical advice that works.
I have the same problem! My daughter, same age, hears only what she wants. School mornings are a nightmare because I have to tell her something over and over before she does it. When she finally gets around to whatever the task was, she takes her sweet time. 3x's the time it should take. Gets very aggrevating to say the least. Whatever you find please share!
Be consistant with follow through and discipline. My five year old girl is very strong willed and has a mind of her own...however, it is definitely more manageable when she knows the action/lack there of and the outcome/consequence.
My daughter is 4.5 and she is also quite slow at doing tasks and I was getting quite frustrated. I have found that counting to 3 (as I do with other discipline) has helped. It only takes a couple of mornings to get them to take notice. If my dd is playing with a toy and I count to 3 and she hasn't done what I asked then the consequence is that the toy she is playing with goes up for a certain amount of time. If she is watching tv I normally say 5 mins then it goes off and we get ready to go. Also, sometimes you need to get eye contact with them at this age for them to take serious notice of what your saying. I have also found getting her to repeat back to me what I've asked her to do seems to get it done faster. Hope this helps.
My kids always behaved better for other people.
Please read "You Can't Make Me (but I can be persuaded)" by Cynthia Tobias. This book is a lifesaver for anyone with a strong willed or spirited child. She gives concrete examples of how to handle daily situations so that you each get what you want/need. She is brilliant! I cannot recommend this book highly enough.
