My 14 yr old son is going to be moving here, it is a new place new school. He is a freshman and I worry that he will get depressed and not have any friends.
Any ideas how to make the transition easier?
My son is doing wonderful. He is in the band here and has friends from that.
The transition is a lot better then I thought it would be.
Thanks again
We moved here last year and things were very rocky for my then 13, now almost 15 year old. I'm not sure if you're a church goer, but finding our youth group was a life saver. It provided instant community for her and a sense of belonging. What part of town are you moving to?
It can be rough for a kid. Let him know too, that there are other options if he doesn't like the new school. I will give you a link www.k12.com It will let you know if there is a cyber school in your area. Alot of kids that don't like their schools choose this method. It is good for them to know that there is another choice and that they don't have to put up with any of the problems if it gets too much for them. Good luck.
Hi J.,
14 is such a difficult age. My advice is to see if there are any children in your neighborhood or close area that will be attending the same school as your son. If so, why not set up something where the two of them can meet. Also, is your son interested in sports? I would check out the school and see about the sports programs, theatre, music programs, etc. that your son may be interested in. If you spoke directly with a teacher/coach perhaps they could advise you or suggest that one of the other kids already in the program could help your son get acclimated. I wish you all the best of luck.
-L.
Hi J.,
14 is a tough time of transition even in the best of circumstances. Try to keep communication lines open with your son, not asking "how was your day" but "tell me about your day today". Let him know you are there for him...no matter what.
Often peer groups are already established and fitting in is difficult.
Getting involved with a church Youth group offers friendships outside of school. Usually these kids are a bit more welcoming.
Perhaps you could offer a Friday night "hang out" at your place where he can invite some new friends to share a pizza and get to know one another.
Guy sleep overs were a hit at my house when they camped out in the basement, played video games, ping pong, air hockey and tried to get into mischief.
At home you have the opportunity of supervising and of betting to know his crowd.
You can offer the opportunities. At this age it's his call what he does with them.
My son still maintains contact with his Youth group friends!!! Hopefully they will be life long buddies.
Blessings!
Justine
Church youth group might be great! I am not sure where you live or if you attend but most churches welcome new youth to their programs! Also perhaps find clubs at school that interest him to become a member of so he will meet kids with similar intersts.
I went through something similar with my then 14 year old daughter when I got remarried and move to a different school district.
I would recommend you contact the specific guidance counselor of the school that will be working with him and his new class schedule and find out how they orient brand new students. My daughter's school actually has a group of kids that volunteer to get paired up with new students to give them the school tour and sort of buddy with them so they can get acclimated. My daughter and the girl who was her "buddy" are still good friends to this day.
If your son is in sports or clubs at his current school, I would contact the team coach and get him enrolled ASAP, even if it is in the middle of the season. The sooner he meets kids with is same interests, the better.
I'm not sure how far away his old friends are but it has been really important to my daughter that I keep her in contact with our old neighborhood and those kids. It really amazes me how close she remains with that group of neighborhood kids. Just because they live 25 minutes away, we still plan stuff and have them over and she goes there for overnights. It's work but it helps soften the trauma of moving. Teens are really sensitive about their friends and their importance.
I would spend one-on-one time with him, give him a tour of the town, mall, restaurants, places you go a lot to make him feel like he is sort of familiar with your life. If there are neighborhood kids his age and you know the parents, see if you can get them together to meet. Teenage boys love video games, so that is always a common interest they could share to get to know one another.
I wish you lots of luck.
get him involved asap in sports, clubs.
We just moved in August and the kids already were on the new soccer teams so when school started in Sept, they knew a few kids.
