Kindergartener Having Trouble Adapting

Have you ever given homeschooling a thought? That way you can allow him to have more activity that he may need throughout the day.

Hi,
The one thing I have learned is loving to learn is way more important than the learning itself. If he is learning not to love learning, it is a problem not to be ignored. Two months is way past the transition period. Whether you get involved and figure out what can be changed to peak his interest, whether you choose to switch school or homeschool - the end result must be a happy interest in learning. I homeschooled my first in K and 1st, and now he thrives. Find your answer, but it must in the end be him learning in an evironment which produces the long term enjoyment of learning. Montessori may be a great answer for you as well. I guess that is not perfect suggestions, but I think understanding what your goal is helps you find your answer.

Good luck, J

Have your husband talk about work -- about how he had to sit all day. But, then, how much stuff he did while he was sitting -- you're brain still moves even while your bum is quiet.

There is a HUGE transition that comes with learning to become a student: the biggest is learning to accept that you are one of a group; the teacher is the big dog and you have to listen to him/her; you must stay in your seat unless given permission to leave; you must raise your hand to speak; etc. This is NOT preschool! It's big kid school!

I have a kindergartner too -- and it's been an adjustment for us. My advice is to accentuate the positive. Just keep remarking how amazed you are at all the leaps and bounds your son is making. "Wow! You couldn't do that last year! Wow! You couldn't count to 100 last year! Wow! You couldn't stay in the lines as well last year! Wow! You weren't so tall last year!" Just keep the positive "my son is growing up and I'm so proud of him" vibe going and hopefully it'll catch.

Good luck!

My daughter is having the same problem. I have found that my husband and I getting involved with school has helped. We eat lunch with her when possible (which has only been 2 times each since we both work), make things for parties, and go to as many school functions as possible. I also talk to her teacher and find out fun things they have done in class so we can talk about that rather than the negative. Since you are a stay at home mom maybe you could spend some time volunteering at the school. It really helped my daughter to see my husband and I having fun and being involved with the school.

Hi Terry,

Every child is different and you have to determine what is best for your son. There are developmental stages in a child's life and at the kindergarten age, sitting all day is not a good fit. Any doctor or social worker that is really in tune with children will tell you kids, especially boys, don't learn well sitting. It pushes their patience to the point of not wanting to learn and we never want to discourage that.

Personally, I homeschool and have homeschooled since my girls were little. We did not "sit" until about age nine. We did however learn at the kitchen table, outdoors, in the car, at the museum, and my testing was primarily oral, not written because neither could sit well...now they do their schoolwork on a computer and at a desk and they are thriving. My 16 year old actually just left for a chiropractic conference with our chiropractors because that is what she aspires to be. She'll be sitting and taking notes there as well much longer than a regular school day.

All that to say, he is normal, very normal. If you want him to be in school, maybe you can talk to the teacher about more outside activities. Give him a "Saturday reward" maybe even a hump day reward too, as he makes it through the week doing what the teacher asks. The more you understand what he is capable of doing, the easier it will be for him.

God bless!

M.

I approached this problem from the other side. I didn't want my Kindergartner to go and sit inside all day. Our family spends a lot of time outside. Both my husband and I work from home and often from the back porch while the kids are outside. When my oldest needed to start kindergarten I couldn't picture her sitting inside all day. It doesn't make sense to me that you spend the early years with your child teaching them to go outside get exercise and be healthy and then as soon as they start kindergarten you tell them that all that is important is to sit and learn. Long story short we found a school that fits in with what we believe. My daughter's kindergarten sends the kids outside as much as possible (even in the rain). They have a garden on the campus that each class has to help tend and they incorporate it into the class lessons such as when studying the letter "p" they dug up sweet potatoes and made sweet potato pancakes. My kid comes home to tell me about nature walks and climbing trees, and yes she is still learning her reading, writing and 'rithmatic. There are a lot of reasons why we chose the specific school we send our child to, but what I am trying to tell you is that there are different types of schools out there and you may be able to find something that suits your child's temperament better. If nothing else, you can talk to your school about the "No child left inside" initiative which encourages schools to get children outside and interacting with their environment more. I don't understand why we expect our kids to be happy about going to school and sitting inside all day, school needs to be more interesting than being at home and re-enforce the lifestyle they have had up to this point, not contradict it.

A lot of kids experience anxiety when starting school, especially when they've spent a lot of good parent/child time at home prior to kindergarten. Most of them will adapt over time. I have no real tips to make it easier...but I do have an alternative suggestion.

Since you are a stay-at-home mom, and have obviously spent a lot of time with your child, have you ever considered homeschooling? It is not as overwhelming as many people think, and it can be a lot of fun to be the one who helps your child discover reading and addition and subtraction.

Homeschooling doesn't have to be a forever issue. You can school kindergarten through whatever grade you want, and then place them back in the school system if you want them to participate in sports or music or if you feel the school is a better choice for your child. This approach can sometimes make transitioning from home to school easier on the child, a little less traumatic.

We've been homeschooling for years; I have two graduated, one almost done, and several others still plodding ahead. Since my youngest is not yet two - we'll be homeschooling for several more years! Ironically, my husband worked for the school district for 8 years! LOL!)

i teach in a pre-k class and when my babies move on they struggle. some of my parents in conjunction with their kindergarden teachers come up with a reward system.
Do you go to class with your son? that may help-- my son used to get real sensitive so i would eat lunch with him or come in the middle of the day and hug him.
also get a child friendly calender so he can see his week and give a sticker for being positive about school.
I think kindergarden is as hard for parents and it is for our children so know that you are not alone in this!!! Give him a journal to draw picture about his day and talk about it like you do then ask him to draw picture about how he wants school to be or even what a postive days looks like. just some suggestions good luck.

He will be fine. Don't worry. He will get used to it. It is a big transition to learn to sit still when he hasn't done it at home. It might help if you give him some play time on saturdays and sundays but have him and his borther sit and color or read to them. Wal-mart has these great write-and-wipe learning books. They have the alphabet and numbers. Have them set and write on them. Make it fun. He will be ok, if he sees his brother is doing it also it will be easier. Keep up the positive questions, If he says anything negative about something at school just tell him these things happen. He needs to get used to being around others and things not going exactly they way he wants it. Belive I have seen plenty of this in my students. He will adjust.