Just Wondering Do You Always Sleep Next to Your Spouse?

My husband snores, too. I tried rolling him to his side or shaking him, and he managed to snore in any position. So, I usually sleep in the next room. I love him like crazy, but not enough to go the rest of my life without sleep!

No, he snores. I like my space and sleep. In a world where we are sleep deprived most of.the time. There is nothing wrong with getting a solid nights rest.

like Manda, mine snores - we use a fan and i got used to it. very rarely it will shake the rafters and wake me up...but mostly, not. thank goodness!

but i used to smoke so i snore sometimes too, one thing that didn't go away when i quit.

so yeah, i sleep next to him. i look at it as one of the perks of being married :)

Yes we sleep together each night. Our snoring is minimal...we just nudge eachother to turn over if either of us is annoyed.

I don't think it is selfish or abnormal to go sleep elsewhere....M.'s got to get her beauty rest!!!!

If you are feeling bad then maybe snuggle up in bed and chat for a bit then move to an alternate, secluded place in the house.

My husband sleeps in our guest room which he calls his. I sleep in the master with my 2 cats lol. Sometimes my baby will too if I'm to tired to put her to bed. We haven't slept in the same room for, gosh well over 3 years. It works for us. It doesn't mean we have problems in our marriage it's really to opposite, we both get sleep so we are happier.

What is best is what works for you.......

There are many couples that do not sleep together for whatever reason....

I always sleep next to my hubby...

That being said, I also have sleep apnea... I am the snorer in the family!

Several years ago, before I was diagnosed, I would wake up in the morning and find out that hubby hadn't slept beside me... and I didn't realize why, but did feel a bit offended.... after we talked, he said that sometimes the snoring was just too much for him to get to sleep.... so I felt bad that it was my fault that he wasn't being able to sleep in his bed....

Then, a while later, he told me that my snoring sounded possibly like sleep apnea..... So I got an appointment with my GP, who then referred me to an ENT, and he got me set up with a sleep study.... and sure enough, I had sleep apnea.

I now sleep with a CPAP and absolutely love it! I've had mine for 9 years now, and didn't have ANY trouble adjusting to it.

And... better yet... hubby doesn't mind sleeping next to someone in a "space mask" ...... so we BOTH get a good night's sleep!

Normally. Sometimes he falls asleep on the couch and sometimes his knee hurts him too badly to come up the stairs (surgery next week though so that will be fixed soon). But yes, we normally sleep in the same bed. We both prefer it. He snores and he says I do too...but it's all good :).

When my DH snores, I shove him. Then he rolls over and stops. If he wasn't easy to stop, I would either go to bed before him (I did this when I had a snoring college roommate) or ask him to see a doctor, or both. Snoring can be a symptom of many things that can affect his health. And, yes, sometimes we do retreat somewhere else when one of us is too sick or twitchy or I just can't get him to stop.

When need be, I am out of there. Married 38 years! Cannot deal with snoring.

yes, I always sleep next to him. Unless he wakes up during the night and goes out to the sofa. Sometimes he can't fall back asleep right away, so he'll go to the sofa and turn the TV on something mind-numbing and fall back asleep. We have a TV in the bedroom, but this way he doesn't disturb my sleep. He's thoughtful like that. :)

He doesn't snore routinely. But every once in a while he does. I just poke him till he rolls over if it disrupts my sleep, but usually it isn't an issue. He isn't one of those really LOUD snorers.... like say... my mother is. I can't sleep on the same floor of the house as her when she really gets going!

My husband and I still sleep together, but he also doesn't snore. In fact, I think I sometimes snore more than he does :)
BUT, my parents sleep in separate rooms. They both snore and my dad has restless leg syndrome. They still have a great physical relationship (it seems that many people think that if you're in separate rooms, there's no more sex) but if they want to SLEEP.....they have their own beds. It works for them, and sleep is important. If you feel like you'll get what you need by being apart from your husband at night, go for it.

Just make sure you seduce him once in awhile so he knows everything is still ok ;)

We move around a lot. My hubby snores horribly.... think freight train.

I start out in bed with ear plugs and wrap my head in my pillow and sometimes take ZQuill but many times I end up on the couch because I NEED sleep.

My sleep is usually 1-2 hr naps all night. I'd LOVE a stretch of good sleep!

Oh my. Yes, hubby and I slept apart for years because of his snoring. We were able to sleep together for the first two to three years of our marriage but then we ended up sleeping apart. He usually slept downstairs on the couch because his snoring was so bad that if he slept on the upstairs couch, he kept me and my daughter awake.

Tried for years to get his doctor to put him in a sleep study to find out what was wrong/why he was snoring as badly as he was. Finally got on a new insurance plan and he was able to get the test. He had sleep apnea so severe, it was a wonder he didn't have a stroke!

He's been using a sleep apnea machine for about the past three years now. I am a very light sleeper. Sometimes he doesn't make any noise all night. Other times he moves and the mask slips or he needs new hoses and mask and stuff but is lazy and doesn't go and order new stuff and then there's a lot of squeaks and sqacks and running/hissy air and overall sleep disturbance. I end up poking him a lot then so that he rolls over on to his side, which helps. I also sleep with wax in my ears. Every night. It's the only way I can comfortably lie in the same bed with my husband and actually get some sleep.

We've been married for 15 years and have actually only slept together for about 5 of those years.

I'd STRONGLY urge you to have your husband get a sleep test and get tested for sleep apnea.

And no, it is not abnormal or selfish for you to want to get a good night's sleep. My husband didn't like it but also didn't hold it against either one of us for having to sleep apart because he knew it was his snoring that was keeping me (and our daughter--it would get that loud) awake/not sleeping properly.

99% of the time I do. If he's sick, then no. When he's sick he snores, tosses and turns and talks in his sleep. When he snores, I poke him and make him turn over.

i turn a fan on to drown him out. but we still sleep side by side.

My husband has a type of sleep apnea that causes him to moan on the outbreath -- not quite snoring, but just as irritating. I tell him to roll over and that usually fixes it. I have a very hard time not sleeping next to him. It's okay for one night, but I like knowing he's there. But I also don't think it's a bad thing for couples to sleep apart. Sleep is a very important part of maintaining a positive attitude in your relationship.

99% of the time, yes I sleep with him, I only get up and leave when he snores really bad which, fortunately, seems to be allergy related (so it's not all the time.)
I think as long as you're still having good, regular sex and are close in other ways then it doesn't matter WHERE you sleep!

Sleep is important! If this is a problem for you, it's time for the two of you to work out an arrangement that works for both of you. It's important for you to have quality time together (intimate time), but sleep is important as well. Both can be done. You might need to get a bit creative, but you'll find a solution.

I like the idea of white noise. We have a box fan in the bedrooms and turn them on every night just for the noise. It's amazing how soothing that is and how it blocks out other noises from the house. Perfect anytime one of us is sick and needs to sleep in the middle of the day or if someone is up late.

Might be worth a try.

No, we do not always sleep next to each other. I would say about 25% of the time we do and 75% of the time we don't. He snores and I get too hot sleeping with someone-even in the winter. Plus, he hogs the covers and the bed-about pushes me off most of the time. I love my husband, but we sleep much better apart. He falls asleep on the couch sometimes and sometimes, I end up on the couch or spare bedroom. Sleep is way too important!! I am surprised to see many others who do not also.

I do sleep next to hubby UNTIL his snoring gets too loud. Then I go find somewhere quiet to sleep. It is not selfish; it's survival!

My husband doesnt snore but he twitches and has RLS. So unless I fall asleep before he does I have a hard time falling asleep because just as I get to the point of sleep he twitches and wakes me back up. So in other words there have been times were I ended up on the couch because he had a bad night. Other times I just get up till I know he is sound asleep, as the twitching will usually stop enough for me to fall asleep.
Other than that neither of us can sleep very well without one another. I have gone away a couple times to visit a friend out of state and both of us do not sleep well during that time.
No my parents have not slept in the same bed or room for almost 13 years because my mom's bad back. They make it work and my dad has turned the bedroom into his own little space while my mother sleeps in the living room and has that as her space. I say to each their own and if you can make it work and still keep a happy marriage, then by all means sleep well!

My husband snores too. If he goes to bed first, I don't even try to sleep in the same room. If I go to bed first, about 60-70% of the time I'm able to stay in the same room and the other 30-40% I end up switching rooms in the middle of the night (occasionally I kick him out but I sleep better in the other bed than he does). It sucks. He's supposed to try to lose some weight, since that usually helps, but we'll see what happens.

I sleep next to mine. He snores, and last night he hit me in his sleep (not hard)! I woke him up and he was horrified. Turned out he was having a fighting dream. I'm starting to think it's a good idea to sleep separately. Once he put his shoulder out by charging the wall when he dreamed he was playing football and shoulder charging another player.

My own bedroom... How wonderful that would be! But I think my husband would feel like I didn't love him anymore.

If you need sleep, you do what you have to do. I don't really have somewhere else to go to sleep, nor want to, so when he is snoring, I take his body and turn it sideways -he seems to know to follow the lead even if sleeping and he either gets onto the side or his tummy and stops for awhile. If he's on his back I just take a pillow and...oh just kidding, cover my ears up with it.

i sleep with my husband. both of us snore occasionally, and have to prod the other to roll over.
if something is going on that causes one of us to be unable to sleep, of course we go sleep elsewhere. that could be snoring, or coughing, or simply insomnia. how can that be selfish?
khairete
S.

always together. he always snores, and i always use earplugs. even when he is out of town i use earplugs because now i am used to them.

I do my best but I am married to a snorer as well. I'd say once a week I either kick him into the guest room or go there myself. I prefer to be with him in my own bed but need my sleep as I work FT. If it were up to him, he'd cuddle all night and snore in my ear. I like quiet and some space. But I still miss him when he is not with me.

No, it's not abnormal to need to get your sleep. It's unhealthy not to.

This is why back in the middle ages women and men had separate sleeping chambers!!!!!

I do sleep next to my husband. We are almost plastered to each other lol. However, I think it's fine to go sleep somewhere else as long as it doesn't build resentment in either one of you. Sleep is too important to have what little you get not be the best quality.

Nope! Sometimes I sleep on top of him, under him, across from him, etc... But not always next to him.

DH rarely snores so not an issue. However you might want to suggest your husband see a doctor. My uncle snored his whole life. He had no idea he had sleep apnea. He now sleeps with a CPAP machine and is a new person. So is his wife.

I always thought it was way too weird that my in-laws don't sleep in the same room or bed and swore that I would follow in my parents' footsteps by sleeping with my spouse. However.....

My husband and I have slept in separate beds and separate bedrooms since I was 3 months pregnant with our first child, and he's now 6. We had to live separately for a few a months while I was pregnant, and while we learned how to live together again, we never really learned to sleep in same bed again. He, too, snores, and it's bad enough to have a kid in bed with me.

We all sleep better that way, and it hasn't negatively affected much of anything.

I do sleep next to my guy. We mostly sleep through each others snoring.

If his snoring is really bad, I'll wake him up. I have nowhere else to go, unless I feel like getting kicked repeatedly in Kiddo's bed.

If I fall asleep before hubby, I am good. If I don't and he starts to snore, oh no!

I still stay in bed with him though and just tough it out. I usually fall asleep pretty easily even with the snoring, just takes a few extra minutes.

We will sleep apart only if one of us is sick and trying to prevent the other from getting it.

I don't think it is selfish of you to move to the next room if your hubby is already asleep and you need to catch some zzzzs! I would just try not to do it all the time. I just watched Hope Springs with Meryl Streep and it really made an impression on me. I want my marriage to be great even after 31 years and part of that might mean sleeping together!

I almost always do. I try to fall asleep first, so his snoring won't bother me. His snoring is not super bad very night, oh, but there are times it is. There have been nights I've moved into bed with my 4 year old (who kicks). Another mom here said that same thing.
My husband only seems to care that I originally get into bed with him. I think there's no problem with you sleeping elsewhere. I do think it's a bit weird when couples never ever sleep together though.

It works because we both snore, but I wouldn't want to go to another room if it was just him and you do get use to it and can sleep through it unless you are a very light sleeper.

Sleep apnea is usually the cause and maybe he should get checked out. There are sleep tests they do for it and if he has it then they would give him an apparatus thing to wear at night when sleeping.

Good luck!

Yes, we do. My husband only snores when he has a cold, so I put up with it. The truth is, I actually can't sleep when he's NOT by my side. His business trips are miserable for me, because I often fall asleep between 4-5 in the morning those nights.

However, I don't know that it's abnormal for couples to sleep apart. Just because I can't do it doesn't mean others shouldn't. It depends on your relationship, and whether sleeping separately will solve or create more tension.

hmmm often times we fall asleep on the couch together facing diferent directions and then at around 3am one of us will wake up and go to bed. we ussually let the other one know J. in case they'd like to go to bed too so i guess my answer is

sometimes? we have intentions to all of the time but that doesnt always happen, but we do ussually spend until 3am next to eachother

hardly ever do we get it on in the middle of the night so it doesnt effect anything since ussually we would have done that before bed anyway

I will frequently turn around and put my head at the other end of the bed. I am pregnant and ALWAYS get insomnia with it and there is nothing laying there tying to go to sleep and listening to the snoring. So I turn around and put my head down at the other end and sleep great once I fall asleep.

i think it would depend on your relationship with him and whether it would cause some distance between you both. how would he feel if you did this? have you chatted to him? can you find a solution together after stating each of your needs...? lastly, maybe he could see a doctor who can determine whether this is a serious issue - a friend of mine's hubby had sleep apnea and had to have an operation as it was so bad he would sometimes stop breathing in his sleep and only wake when he has not enough oxygen... hope this helps :)

Abnormal? I don't know. It might depend on the motive.

Sleeping next to the Champion Snorer of the Western World almost made our marriage go down the tubes. He has a talent for snoring LOUDLY and clearly no matter how or where he turns, and I get *really* grouchy if I don't get sleep. Separate bedrooms are a necessity for us, and the change was a mutual agreement. Had to be done.

So whom *do* I sleep next to? A couple of cats - when they're not sleeping ON me instead. Oh well.

Not only does my hubby snore he likes the TV on and keeps the volume loud. I love him dearly but I cannot sleep in the same room. I do not think it is selfish or abnormal since I have known other people that do the same thing. My daughter has a full and twin bed (trundle) in her room so I sleep in there.

We do, but what's right or wrong just depends on what works for your household.

Yes we sleep next to one another. My husband has started snoring as of late so I have to give him a quick, loud "SHHHHH!!" and he'll wake up briefly and stop. This may happen once a night or a few times a night. At this point, it's not too bad, so we're both staying put.

There was a question like this recently. Some people thought it was horrible but plenty others said they just need to sleep so they go where they can sleep and their marriage is just fine.

Good question. DH and I have been married for almost 21 years. We have had separate bedrooms for 20 of those years and I love him more every day. He sleeps with a machine because he has apnea. I'm a light sleeper. Getting together for some "adult" fun involves an invitation, so the spark is still there. Our only problem is when we go on vacation. Gets very expensive getting 2 rooms.