I've Never Seen Her This Way.

She is 6. She has some really strong feeling right now. They are real feelings, but she will have to learn to live with her dad is going to come back in 6 months.

This is hard for both of you, but she is a little girl and you are a grown woman.

You need to gather yourself up and start modeling some strong coping behaviors.

You need to be positive, you need to quit thinking of your needs for a while and you need to help your daughter get through this in a healthy way.

That means speaking clearly about feelings.

"I really miss dad too, but he needs us to be strong, so he can do a good job" "We need to show dad we can take care of ourselves until he gets back." "I need a hug." "I think we should write a letter to dad, help me think of happy things to tell him." "I need you to draw a happy picture to dad". "Every day lets write on a calendar the fun thins we did that day. "

Think of things the 2 of you CAN do to stay in touch with dad.
Think of ways your daughter can be a big helper to you. Thank her when she helps you.

Show her you are not a victim. You are a capable woman who is in charge of this household. You make decisions. You take charge and you will take care of her no matter what. Do you have a job outside of the home? If you do, be sure your daughter can go and see what it is you do. Let her see you doing responsible work. Teach her what it means to be a good employee. Get to work on time, working on assignments until they are finished. Working a s a team. This way when you explain that dad is "working" it is not just a concept, but real to her.

6 year old girls can already be drama queens but if we let them go overboard, they learn this as a way of manipulating other people. No one likes a weepy needy, weak person. They are a drag and a downer. Help her have these feeling, but to also move on.

Instead become a problem solver. Step up and get a hobby. Join a community group that helps others with less than the 2 of you have. It will help to not always be thinking about yourself. It will show you how fortunate you are to be healthy, to have a home and to have a dad/husband willing to do what it takes to support his family.

I am sending you strength. 6 Months IS a long time, but the good news is he IS coming home. We live in modern times with all sorts of communications. Many moms and their families on here do not see the dads for a year of longer and do just fine. You can too.

S., try writing to the military wives. If you put "Miltary mothers" in the subject line, they will open the thread. The hard thing is that a lot of moms are not online right now, with the holidays.

So sorry.

Dawn

Can she talk to a guidance counselor at school when she goes back?
Can you ask your pediatrician for some advice?
YOU have to be STRONG--for her.
It's completely normal--she's missing her dad.

There is nothing worse than seeing your child in emotional pain. But she will survive this. Her grief is normal.

The last time my 6 year old did that she had a raging fever the next day.. could she be getting sick?