Is My 3 Year Old Seeking Attention?

Of course he's seeking attention – he's 3! (or 4! or 5! or…).

But seriously, so much is being learned about children's motivation, and so much depends on the way we encourage them. Some 'encouragement' is actually demotivating. Here's a wonderful article on the latest research – I'm sure you'll read things that will surprise you and cause you to rethink the kinds of encouragement you offer: How NOT to Talk to Kids, by Po Bronson: http://nymag.com/news/features/27840/

If you think he is doing it for attention then just don't play that game with him. Next time you go if he says "I can't" just respond "well just do your best. I'm going to talk to the mommies now. Yell for me to see when you get to the top.". It is a lot more fun to play with the other kids than it is to sulk with no one noticing.

I agree with Kerry B. Try ignoring him and see what happens.

Also he may have behaved differently because he's in the habit of being "helpless" at the first place with that set of people. In the new place he acted more naturally.

One idea which seems true to me is that sometimes when we offer or agree to help we're unintentionally giving the message that we think they can't do it. When we say something like, "I know you can do it, yourself" and leave them to do it they will be able to do it. Calm "hands off" has worked much of the time with me and my grandchildren.

You story gave you your answer: he can do it if you're not watching. He "can't" when he sees that you are. He is wanting 1) your attention or 2) your involvement in his play and he doesn't know other ways to get you involved.
His attention seeking may or may not be related to you going back to school.
Sometimes it's just the age and the stage.

Suggestions: try loveandlogic.com
Great advice on all things parenting related---suggestions on how to help develop a responsible kid who can take care of themselves. Your son is not sure he can take care of himself now.

definitely sounds like attention seeking to me. My suggestion would be to mostly ignore it. If he says I can't, just say "ok" and be busy doing something else. If he wants to sit and watch others have fun, let him. Eventually he will realize that his game is not getting him any attention and he will join the others without any encouragement.