Invited My Son's Friends to Go with Him to Rollerskating Rink- Should I Pay?

I think that if you invited them, you should be prepared to pay. Tell them that you will pay admission but that they might want to bring money for spending.

I think that when you invited them that is when you should have said

"Hey, we're going to the skating rink tonight for teen night. It costs $7 plus skates and then what ever they'd spend on extras. Do you think X and X would like to ride along with us?".

This way she knows up front that it will cost about $XX.xx per child and if she can afford it.

I agree with the ones that say it depends on how you invited them. I say something like, "I'm taking the kids to the skate rink, can Austin go? We'll pay." Or, "I'm taking the kids to the skate rink, can Austing go? It will be $7 to get in, plus $4 skate rental and any spending money he needs." Big difference in how you ask so you know for next time. But generally, if we invite, we pay. Good luck!

if you didn't make that clear when the invite was extended then you have to pay.

If you invited, then you pay. Sorry - that is basic etiquette.

I don't understand your question.......

Basic Etiquette 101........ You invite = You pay

I've always made sure my daughter had $$ on her just in case she needed it. About 2 yrs ago, she was invited to dinner with a family at a nice restaurant and when the dinner was over, the mom who invited her to come along, presented daughter with an itemized check including a portion of the shared appetizer. Pretty tacky in my book because I would never in a million years pull something like that. However, it confirmed that she always needs extra money just in case something like that comes up again.

I never have a problem paying my way or daughters but if I ever invite someone, they don't open their wallet because I invited them.

This was the same family who's daughter accompanied us to Six Flags (Our invitation so we planned and expected to pay 100%, no strings attached) and we purchased a season pass for their daughter during the spring and took both girls several times over the summer.

I wouldn't send my child with you without sending money with him, but if I were you, I would take enough cash to be prepared to pay just in case the parents don't send any money with their children. You'd hate to get there and them not be able to get in and have fun because there was some confusion on the parents' end.

I wouldn't contact the parents to tell them cost. They are adults and perfectly capable and should be figuring those things out on their own. But, that is just me. If you feel that is necessary to ensure you don't have to foot the bill, go ahead.

I would just pay for them, but that is me! If your budget doesn't allow it, do what you need to do to ensure you don't spend money you don't have.

If you invite your kids' friends, you should pay, unless you make it clear, up front, that they are responsible for their own costs. I'd pay for them this time, but if you can't do it every time, just be clearer next time.

If you invite, you pay.

If I invite, I pay.

You should pay. Hopefully, the favor will be returned.

When we invite friends to come along we say "Can Conner come bowling with us on Saturday? It costs $10 to get in, and extra if he wants snacks." If I have a coupon or a pass, I'll say "Can Connor come bowling with us on Saturday, it's my treat." When my kids are invited I usually ask how much it will cost if the other parent doesn't mention it. I also send my child with some cash for extras.

I think if you invited them you should pay for admission and skate rental but they should be responsible for anything else. If you had specified costs up front like "Hey they are having a skate night and it costs $7 to get in and XX for skates. Does XX want to come?" then I would think that you would not be responsible for the costs but if they have already been invited and said yes I would pay.

If you organized and invited then you pay. If it is between kids only they each pay their own way. We've always done it that way and most others I know do the same.

You invite, you pay.

my son was just invited to the movies and of course he has enough money in his pocket for the movie and some popcorn....always send extra money just in case!!!

It depends on HOW the conversation goes. If you think that the kids will want to skate with your son more than once, you certainly don't want to be expected to pay every time.

You can call and say that your son is going skating on "x" date. Tell them that you will be happy to pick up and drop off. Say that you wanted to let his friends know in case they'd like to go along. Tell them how much admission and skates are, and that the snack bar sells drinks and snacks.

This lets the parent know that you aren't fronting the costs.

Dawn

If someone invited my child I would send them with money. To me that is just common courtesy. I would be thankful that they invited my child and offered to drive. That is just me though.

However, not all parents think the same way, so I would bring extra money just in case.

It is not like you are inviting them to a birthday party.

When invite someone to do something, you're the host and responsible for the cost.

If this was a case of your son talking to his friends first, then asking you "Hey mom, give us a ride?" then it isn't an invitation.

If it is one friend going out I usually end up paying. If more than one let them take care of it.

Make it clear to moms up front. Say " I am happy to pick up X and X -Send them with $7 to get in and more if you want them to be able to get a snack or something. "

I never would assume that you would pay for my son if your son invited him--unless its a birthday party.

You are driving, nothing more. You shouldn't have to make it clear beyond telling the parent how much the admission and mention it is this much for skate rental if they need it.

When you tell them they have the option to say never mind. I suppose at that point if your son really wants them to come you can offer to pay.

I see this is already over, but yes, you should have paid. I always pay and if I can't, I don't invite others. I always send my kids with money, but they come home with what they bring 99% of the time. You should have offered to pay.

It depends on how the invite was provided. It is all in the interuptation.

My son was invited to go to some play world with the kids upstairs, I assumed I was paying. She actually paid for him because it was a thank you to my husband and I for watchng her girls in the morning before school.But I still would have paid.

You are not obligated to pay.
But it should have been decided at the time the invitation was extended.

For me/us per things like that, the parents of the kids we invite, pay for their own kid. But I am taking them to the outing and invited them.
They don't "expect" me... to pay for their kid, too.
Unless I say, I will pay for their kid. But again, the parents will still, offer to pay. For their own kid.
That is how it is, here.

If you invited them, you need to pay for admission. Snacks they want to buy are on them.

If you are merely giving them a ride, they should pay their own way.

The only exception would be an invite that was along the lines of "hey dudes, i'm going to the skating rink friday night. anyone wanna go?"

In that case, the moms probably will realize they need to send money. But take a few extra dollars along just in case. Seems like i always have one kid with us whose mom never 'remembers' to send spending money.

Obligated? No.

When I do something with someone else's kid, I am always prepared to pay, although I don't always do so.

Last weekend my daughter was invited to her friend's birthday dinner at a pizza place. I was asked to drop her off and it was only my daughter and the family. Then the invitation was extended to me. There was no mention of who was paying and any mention would have been awkward in my view.

I got about 15 miles down the road and realized I didn't have my purse. I turned around and went back home to pick it up and called them to tell them what happened. At that point, they insisted it was okay and not to worry. What they didn't say was we were paying for this, so I did end up going all the way home for my purse and more importantly some money.

I invited the same mom and daughter to the Polar Express with us. I had one ticket and needed one more. I asked if she would like to come and let her know I already had a ticket and an additional ticket, room, and board would be $30. She had no problem handing me the money.

Anyway, I guess if you want them to pay you will need to say this upfront. Are you driving them? If you said meet me up there, then they will have to pay at at the door.

I figure it all washes out if this is a friend your son often hangs out with. I guess you have to see it as, if your son were with them and ran out of money and needed a drink, would you want them to buy him a drink or let him watch everyone enjoy their drink.

I think it depends on how the invitation was extended...if you said "hey, I'm dropping Jimmy off at the skating rink on Friday night. The cost is $7 plus whatever food/drinks they want. I can drop Johnny off too if he'd like to go" then no, they should figure they are paying for Johnny.

If you said "Would Johnny like to go skating w/ Jimmy Friday night? I can drop them both off." Then you should be prepared to cover at least the admission and maybe mention "I'll cover the skating but he should have any spending money that he may want or need".

Depends....
Did the boys get together and talk about going and you said, "I'll drive!"? If that happened then I say the other kids need to bring money.
If your son called them up and said, "Hey, you guys want to go skating tonight?" then it's an invite and you may need to be prepared to pay.
I would just talk with the mothers. "Hey, I am so glad that the boys could get together tonight. It costs $7 a person plus skate rental. I'll pick them up at 7!"

This is a toss up, IMHO.

*I* would be tempted to pay, since I invited them...but on the other hand if my son was invited I would NOT expect the other Mom to pay, just b/c they invited him? Strange.

If you can afford it I would offer and see what the other Mom says? Maybe if you offer to pay for the admission and skates but then suggest they bring their own 'snack money'??

For us it depends on the friend. Our daugther has a friend where whoever is hosting, pays. With most of her other friends and most of my oldest son's friends, it's expected that each person will cover his or her costs and bring spending money. The kids usually communicate this pretty directly ("hey bring $20, we'll pick you up at 7") and I think at this age most kids expect to cover their own costs but bring extra $$ just in case.

Since it isn't a birthday party, pend the night or you didn't come out and say I'm paying then it should be understood that the parents pay. You may want to make it clear by letting the parents know details of cost then there won't be an uncomfortable moment of a kid saying, "mom didn't gie me money" Even when my son has been invited to stay the night and they are going to go anywhere I always ask how much money does he need. I'd rather ask that then put the other parent on the spot expecting them to pay. Sometimes I even feel guilty if they are paying ad don't take money from me to help pay. I'm bad about making pricing clear when I am not paying and several times have gotten caught with the bill. My SIL is real bad about inviting her kids to go with us somewhere and then expecting us to pay. Not bad when it's something small but she's done that with Six Flags and Baseball games etc where can get expensive real quick.

Up to you really. If the kids were going to go anyway and you were just driving...then you shouldn't have to. If it was your son's idea and he invited them, I would probably pay admission/rental, but they should bring their own spending money.

Mary - I am sorry I am late to answer. I realize this is already happened, however, if **I** invite someone somewhere - movies, ice skating, rollerskating, etc. **I** pay for their way. Otherwise, I don't invite.

If my kids get invited to go with someone? I ALWAYS give them money. They have ALWAYS come home with the money.

If it was truly an invitation, one where the only reason those kids are going skating is because you invited them, then you should pay. But if your son and his friends are going skating and you're giving them a ride to the rink, payment is on them.

I would think that most kids would bring their own money just in case. I would be pretty unhappy with my teen if he let his friend's mom pay his way to a "teen" event when he has his own money to spend on stuff like that.

I don't think you are obligated to pay; it's not like you're sponsoring it or hosting it. If you have contact info for the moms, just call and say you wanted to touch bases on the amount of money they were going to give the kids just so everyone has essentially the same amount to spend.

If you want this outing to be what used to be called "dutch treat," then you need to say so up front. It might make a difference as to whether the friends can go or not. Some moms automatically ask about this when their children are invited places, but not all of them, so it's up to you to be clear about what the arrangements need to be.

You may certainly pay your sons' friends' admission (and snacks) if you'd like to!

did you say . "call and see if x and y wasn't too go skating with you?" or did you say sure I can give x and y a ride. if you set it all up they might expect you to pay. but at teen age they might not. call the kids mom and say how much money are you sending with x I'm not sure what they will need. it will let them know your not paying

When I was asked to go anywhere, I paid for myself. I did have a friend who's parents always told me that they'd cover me. They used to invite me to go swimming at the club and would offer to cover fries and a drink for me, which is all I wanted anyways.
I have a second grader...if I asked his friends for a fun night, I would feel obligated to pay. When he's older and he asks his friends for a fun night, well I would expect the friends to pay their way.