Ideas Needed for Sleeping Arrangements

Updated on May 02, 2009
M.R. asks from Sun Valley, CA
23 answers

I have a 10m daughter and we co-sleep in an arms reach co-sleeper. Recently, her sleep has been very restless. She wakes up several times a night, crying and crawling around, trying to stand in her cosleeper! Luckily, I wake up right away and catch her, but still. We need another sleeping arrangement. I realize I can put our matresses on the floor, but what about her co-sleeper? She'd be above us. Are there any kind of co-sleeping beds that work for a child who's slightly older? We still want her to have an enclosed, or partially enclosed bed to keep her safe, but I don't know of any. I have a feeling a crib would upset her a lot, since she did not like the bassinet as a newborn, and we quickly learned co-sleeping was the best for all of us. Cry it out does not work for us, and we only have one bedroom, so she will be in our room for a while longer.
I need some ideas about sleeping arrangements. Thanks!

1 mom found this helpful

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

Featured Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.A.

answers from Los Angeles on

I'd do a crib. You can see through the sides, and the sides are tall enough so she doesn't fall out. If you still want her close to you, you could drop the side next to the bed. I don't know if a gap will be left btwn the crib and the bed, I would worry about that. I know 2 of my kids were restless sleepers, and that is when they moved out of my room. I am a much better mom when I get plenty of sleep.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.Y.

answers from Los Angeles on

We removed the side of the crib, lowered the bed to the floor and placed the crib mattress at the same height. It works great! my son is 14.5 months and I don't see changing this arrangement until I'm ready to move into his room with him in a full size bed

More Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

B.S.

answers from Reno on

It sounds to me that the issue isn't cosleeping but her safety. If she is trying to climb out she needs something that she can't climb out of! Try taking the bassinett part out and have her sleep in the bottom. Or they make cosleepers that go in your bed but provide a little barrier (like five inches) so you don't roll on the baby....but def get her something she can't climb out of!!!!

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.R.

answers from San Diego on

For anyone, please read the safety information on your kid's items. A cosleeper is to be used until 3-4mo of age and NOT after a child can sit up. It is just not safe.
If you want her in your room but not necessarily in your bed, use a crib, pack-n-play, whatever is safety rated for her age and size. Most babies are in a crib until age 2.5 to 3 or so. In the long run, a crib purchase is not that expensive and can be used for the next child.

If you want her to sleep with you, your bed must be against the wall with no space for her to fall through and she is in the corner. You should only have thin blankets, no pillows near her, no obese persons in the bed and do not drink alcohol or take sleeping medications that would delay your response time if you roll over on her (very rare, but more common in the US than in other countries).

Also, at this age, cry it out would be fine because she should go to bed at 7-8pm, much before you most likely. Even with one bedroom, you would be in another room just like the rest of us. What upsets a newborn is very different at 10mo. Just think of all the advances she has made! The crib may make her feel secure, special in her own space.

Please try Dr. Weisbluth's book Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child. It has been great for my 2 kids (who, by the way, slept in a cosleeper, our bed, cribs in our room and in their own room and now share a room and sleep well through the night, the 1yo in a crib and our almost 3yo on a mattress on the floor transitioning to a big girl bed).

Realize safety comes first, and sleep is very important for your baby and yourself. A 10mo should sleep 10-12 hr at night and take 2 naps 1-3 hr each.
Good luck!

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

P.K.

answers from Las Vegas on

First let me say DITTO! My son was not having the crib. If he wasn't next to me he was freaking out! About 15 months he started the same thing. I was terrified that he'd end up on the floor. My husband was really pushing me to put him in the crib because none of us were getting any sleep. I told him that I don't do the whole cry it out thing either but since we have a twin bed in the room I figured I might be able to get him to sleep as long as I was in the small bed. It was incredible. I put him in the crib and he turned right over onto his belly with his buns in the air and was out in about 8 seconds. That was the first time he slept thru the night!!! What tha'!? He just wanted some peace and quiet! He actually wanted to have his own space. I had heard other mothers say the same thing but I thought they were just a little crazy. Having babies seems to do it to all of us! It worked really well. Some nights he would still wake and I would come in and rock him and he'd got back out. It sounds crazy but it has strengthened our bond. When he wakes in the morning he is so excited to see me. Best of all though...we are all getting some sleep! My biggest fear is that i would lose an important bond but instead my little guy gets to excercize his independance in a way that is comfortable without feeling abandoned. Now in the morning he will wake up and talk in his bed. It is so cool to have the monitor and hear him chatting away with his teddy bear. When I come in the room to get him he actually points to me and tells the bear 'there's mama' almost as though he's telling teddy not to worry because he knows I'll be there!

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

She's going through developmental changes in her motor skills.
This is common at each juncture of change and growth.
YES, they will even stand in their crib or roll around or scoot around and pull up. It's normal. BOTH my kids did that when they hit milestones too. It does abrupt their sleep.
Its hard to make them "not" stand up... but we need to help them get back down... because sometimes, per their development, they 'cannot' then sit back down and lie down in perfect sequence and posture themselves back into a perfect little sleep position.
It is a "phase" and they will get better at adjusting their physical skills. Until then, it will cause a hiccup in things.

Why not put her mattress on the floor? That's what we do and did with both our kids, and co-sleep there when needed. Our floor futon is in our bedroom. It works for us.
What you would do, is co-sleep w/her when it's nap-time or bedtime, and then once she falls asleep, you can go back to your/Hubby's bed....and or just get up and go do what you want = "me" time.

And yes, as Jacy and the other posters said, why not try a crib? It IS safest... and when she gets older AND more mobile, it will contain the child more safely, especially when putting them down for naps/bedtime.

Then too, its a matter of just letting the phase pass... each time they gain another motor skill, they will then "practice" it, even when they are supposed to be sleeping.... and it's just sort of 'instinctual' that they go through this process. When both of my kids did that... I woke, comforted them, co-slept, or helped them get back down or sit down, and laid them down. It IS repetitive... but so it is. "Growing pains" is also a doozy for the child too... and often it is a combination of things: their changing REM sleep patterns, their changing physical development, their changing cognitive development, separation anxiety, teething, "night terrors" etc. ALL developmental based.
Sleep patterns for a baby or child evolves...it is NOT static. Even for adults its not static.

It will pass...

Or, there are those enclosed child play tents that you can make into a cute little sleeper for her, with a pad in it. Here is a link:
http://www.toysrus.com/search/index.jsp?kwCatId=&kw=k...

My daughter went through a phase where she liked to sleep in hers. LOL (but she was already a toddler at this point, not a baby).

All the best,
Susan

1 mom found this helpful

H.H.

answers from Los Angeles on

I went from bassinet to crib but had all ways wished I had got the smaller portable crib on wheels because we live in a smaller house and it would have been better for her sleep and ours if there was a crib we could role from room to room when we had house guests. Sounds like the co sleeper is no longer safe. I think you may need to bite the bullet transitioning to the crib. Soon enough everyone will be getting better sleep though it will be tough at first. I had a hard time with CIO as well but instead just rubbed her back until she went back to sleep. CIO can go easier than you think and its not like you just leave them to wail, you can comfort them all day long, just don't pick them up. Hope you find a good solution. I am also an artist. Do you have a web site? I don't hardly know any mom artists.

C.D.

answers from Los Angeles on

We brought a futon into our room. Now my daughter and I sleep in the queen-sized bed (she sleeps on the side of the bed that is pushed up against the wall & we line the wall with pillows... and Daddy sleeps on the twin-sized futon. This works for us.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

D.L.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi M.,
I can totally relate to your post, as we have gone throught the same thing...and still are to a certain degree.

We have practiced some form of co-sleeping from the beginning. First with a bassinet close by, and then a crib. One of us was always in the room with him, if not both.

Since our DS used a crib, when he got a bit older (like 12 months???) we lowered the bar on one side of the crib (but didn't totally remove it) and put that side of the crib adjacent to our bed. That way, I could see him throughout the night and respond to his needs, sometimes even picking him up and bringing him into bed with us. When he got older and could "climb" over the lowered rail (at about 2-years-old), I would always wakeup to see him and tend to his needs.

We had our bed (mattress and box spring) directly on the floor, no frame, and it just happened to be about the same height as the mattress of the crib when we placed it next to our bed. The crib mattress was in the lowest position. it worked out great for us. Sometimes he fell asleep in the crib w/mommy lying down on the bed. Sometimes he fell asleep in the big bed w/mommy and then I would place him in the crib.

We at least got 6 hours of uninterrupted sleep this way, from say 11:00 pm to 5:00 am, and then either he wanted a bottle, or wanted to come in bed with us.

BTW...did you know that the term co-sleeping includes both baby sleeping in the same bed with you and/or baby sleeping in the same room with you but in their own bed. They still get the same benefits as being the bed with you, w/o the danger of getting tangled up in your bedding, etc. It really worked for us. Good luck!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

Please stop using the co-sleeper, she is way too old for it and it is unsafe for a child that age. We had one for our son and we loved it, but we moved him out of it when he was big enough to sit up by himself.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.W.

answers from Los Angeles on

How about a pack and play (play pen)?

S.F.

answers from Los Angeles on

We practiced family bed too, and it was wonderful. Good for you for wanting to stick with it. But I think it's time to put away the co-sleeper -- once she can get out of it, it's a problem.

We used the co-sleeper too, and both sons grew out of it at around 5 months. I was able to find a bed rail that fit on a king-size bed, and just brought my sons into bed with us (between me and the rail). But if your daughter is standing up, this may not work for you either.

We were able to remove one side of our crib, so that it was three sided. If you can do that, maybe you can put that against your bed? Or you can push the bed against the wall and put her between you and the wall?

Maybe it's time for a toddler bed, and that should go on the floor of your bedroom? Or just the crib mattress could go on the floor.

Stick to your guns. If CIO doesn't work for you (it sure didn't for me) then find something that does. You'll be happier for it, believe me.

So much good luck to you.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.P.

answers from Los Angeles on

Sounds like she's going througha growth spurt. You might want to try giving her Lifetime or Bluebonnett liquid calcium, which can be found in healthfood stores. 1 teaspoon for a week and see if that helps. Dairy does not have enough calcium for many kids....and adults. My kids sleep like rocks. We've bed-shared with all 3 of them and current;y have our 13month old between us. She sleeps better between us than in her crib for extended periods.

Feel free to e-mail me off list.

If you are BFing, then increasing your calcium will do the trick, but it may take longer and you shoudl probably do it anyway, to increase the calcium that's been utilized by the baby. I use this calcium. It's inexpensive AND has 7 different sources of calcium to support ALL of my tissues. The tablets are small and easy to swallow and I sleep as hard as she does!
www.worldlifesupplements.com

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

Either a crib which I think would be much better,or I think a pack-n-play-is your best bet-but the co-sleeper is not a safe place for her now that she crawls and can or will very shortly pull herself up. We have 10month old twins-one (girl-sleeps in a crib) which is a good sleeper and the other(boy-sleeps in a psk-n-play-not as comfortable as a crib) which is horrible,and my husband refuses to do sleep training, which would be horrible for a few nights,but will be better in the long run- does straight sleep from 7pm to 7am sound good to you-its sounds dreamy to me? Can you put her in your walk in closet? Or side hallway? Maybe a crib on wheels would be good for your situation... Good luck!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.A.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi M.,

If you have an armsreach Cosleeper (that's the brand name), they sell canopies that zip up and are enclosed and made of netting so that your baby cannot fall out. My 11 month old son does exactly the same thing and we have an armsreach cosleeper with a canopy on it so it's a non issue. He is totally safe and cannot get out until I unzip the canopy and pick him up, but at the same time I can see that he is safely sleeping when he's in there because the netting is very sheer. They come in mini size and original size according to the size of your cosleeper.
www.armsreach.com

If your cosleeper is made by a different brand, go on their website for accessories and see if they make canopies for it. Most brands do.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

L.D.

answers from Los Angeles on

Maybe you could rent a crib or get a super cheap one that way if it doesn't work, you haven't made a big investment?

I think it's pretty normal for babies to move around alot in their sleep at that age. My daughter seeps in a crib. I put her down one way and she ends up somewhere else when I check on her before I go to bed. " Just like we move around all night."

HTH!
L.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

Maybe a toddler bed that has 3 sides to it pushed up against your bed. So she's still enclosed but able to stand without falling out.
Yes, she's probably teething and it will pass.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

she may be teething which can make her act like that. maybe just try a regular play pen since shes used to the co sleeper. then si can see that your right there and it can stay next to your bed and if she stands in it she wont fall out. also another option would be a porta crib. its smaller then a regular crib so you can still have it next to your bed at night then you can roll it to a wall when its not in use. you cant really base a liking of a bed of a newborn baby. it takes getting used to and your baby needs to feel secure. i would try a crib you may be surprised. hope this helps :)

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

D.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

We didn't use a crib with our third mostly because our first two never did (all three are co-sleepers) and we gave the crib away after the second one. (#3 was a bit of a surprise, lol)

My older two had just moved into a bunk bed when the youngest was born, and we had a wooden toddler bed to use. I took the tot bed and placed it between my bed and the wall. Used beach towels to fill in any gags and we had a nice arraignment. Had the footboard of the tot bed against the wall that was at our heads because it was shorter then the head board. You definitely need to have a corner of the room with solid walls on either side for this to work well though.

Or you could put your bed on the floor and just buy her a twin mattress to place along side yours. But then if she's an active gymist while asleep then she might roll across the room. And you'll want to have a baby gate at your bedroom door so that she isn't wandering the apartment in middle of the night while your asleep.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

A couple things we did was have them sleep in our bed but it does get crowed. My son had a small fold out couch (wiggles) that you can get at toys r us pretty cheap he would sleep on that next to our bed. With my older ones I would lay with them in there own bed and after they fall asleep go back to my bed. What if you just put blankets on the floor next to your bed and let her sleep there so she is on the ground (can't fall) but still close to you we have also done that too. Good luck. This to shall pass

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

Echoing what others have said, a Pack-N-Play worked great for us! And, you can find them for $10 at yard sales. They are cheap, portable, and when she does stand (which she will), she won't fall out and injure herself. We used one with our son until he was 2. We waited until we felt we could trust him in a toddler bed not to run all over the house in the middle of the night. Of course a portable or regular crib would also do the job nicely, but it will cost you a bit more. Best wishes!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

W.A.

answers from Honolulu on

Portable crib. We had the metal Cosco brand folding portable crib. It's like 75% the size of a full size crib. We used it with both our kids when they became too big for the co-sleeper..around 8 months with my daughter and 5 months with my son. It was still directly next to my side of the bed and we would fall asleep each night holding hands thru the bars. It will cost you about $100 but they are SAFE. Your pillow cant fall in, and they cant get out. when they wake up with dreams, etc. It's so easy to reach in, give assurance and put your hand thru the rails to rub a belly for comfort. My daughter used her porta crib till she was 19months then moved into a full size crib in her own room. My son is 15 months and moved into the full size crib at 11 months but it's still right next to my bed. I love having my kids close but as they get older it's also about safety as well as them learning to be comfortable in their own space. Good luck to you!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

I.T.

answers from San Diego on

My daughter's crib is a "lifetime" crib. (It will turn into toddler bed, day bed, full-size bed.) If you happen to have one of these, you could remove the side and set it up as a daybed or toddler bed w/o the safety rail (whichever is closest tho your bed's height) and set it up right next to your bed. You'd get a co-sleeper with higher sides.

Hope this helps.
-I.

For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions

Related Searches