I Miss My Husband's Company - Any Advice?

You both need some intimacy! And don't think that just because you can't have sex means that you can't have a release. My husband and I both have very high sex drives, so after our baby we found other ways to please each other and find release until we got the go-ahead. Even playfulness, lots of affection, will help. Your husband should be drawing closer, instead he's pushing away.

I hope you and your husband will open up communication about this and find a compromise that will get you both through the next month. Good luck!

Please, correct me if I'm wrong, but it sounds like you need something too. Whether it be emotional intimacy or physical. I would curl up with him and sure your feelings with him. You absolutely should see a doctor and get the go ahead before you "re-unite" in that way. As we all know, there are other ways to express intimacy, I would suggest pursuing those avenues if you feel comfortable. I don't think your DH is a bad guy, but rather is very attracted to you and would like to let you know, but maybe doesn't remember how. I know that I felt ready way before my body was ready. You could do serious damage that could extend you recovery further. Good luck. and Congrats on your new arrival.

P., I'm a tell it like it is kind of gal.
Tell your husband(in your own words) to suck it up and stop being so immature and selfish. He's wrong to treat you like that. Frankly, you don't need that. Especially now. Two weeks is too soon! You've just had major surgery!!(I had 2-BTW)

I understand how important intimacy is to our relationships but this is just unhealthy/possibly dangerous to your body. Soon enough you will be able to resume any and all activities that you both want to do. In the meantime, do other things to feel connected. We have to adjust many things in our lives once we become parents. This is just one of them.

You labeled this discussion under post partum depression. If you are suffering from post partum depression you need to speak to your ob/gyn immediately about it. Having a new baby is a huge adjustment for both mom and dad. My advice is take care of yourself first. Speak to your ob/gyn right away and deal w/ your feelings, both emotional and physical. Bring you husband to the doctor with you so you can both discuss what you are experiencing. Good luck and don't forget to update us!

P., you should see a gynecologist. Ask for an ultrasound. You may have cysts or gallstones. This can cause pain during intercourse (advice by experience). I've had two c-sections one at 10 years, another at 14 years ago. Neither time did it effect my ability to please my partner. Its been a while, so for the sake of his needs, when it was me, I gave whether I felt like it or not. Much to my surprise, he didn't require anything special from me...just a little intimacy. Its healthy that you're regularly intimate. I look at it this way...I don't know whether you are Christianic or not, but for me, since biblically it says that immediately after a fast to (for lack of biblical words) re-consumate your marriage. If a few days God advises it...what more does this marriage need after months?! Just a thought. Hope it helps.

If you are still in pain, it may not be safe for you to have sex, Christian or not. Are you still bleeding? Taking the below argument, according to the Bible you are not to have sex while you are still bleeding.

Two weeks following a c-section is too soon to have sex. I have had four of them, believe me I know. Your inciscion is not ready. Even when your belly seems healed your uterus is still healing and that's why the DR tells you to wait until after your post partum apt. Didn't the hospital give you a discharge paper that says that? You could split your uterus open.

When I was on bedrest prior to deliver and in the two months following delivery, I did other things to make my husband feel that we were being intimate without 'going all the way.'

Honestly, I'm concerned about your husband's reaction. It is perfectly normal for him to feel a little left out or even ignored right now, but he needs to know that it is not safe for you to really have sex right now and ask him what you can do to make him feel wanted in other ways.

Feel free to PM me too.
S., mom to four girls ages 1-5

I know what your going through, we were there twice, and honestly we didnt wait, we couldnt wait anymore, after about 2 or 3 weeks, im fine no problems, but i didnt have any pain either, so if you decide to try it, just take it slow, when it starts to hurt just stop and try something else, or different positions. I hope this helps you, and good luck. Oh by the way, i dont think your hubbys a bad guy, i just think you might be exciting him alittle too much, expecially since its been a while, and its hard on him (i know on us too) to see you there and know he cant touch you, and he may be scared to hurt you.

Tell him you do miss him & want to please him in another way..it doesn't have to be sex but it can mean different things. (trying not to be too graphic) But that you also need to feel connected as well. Just communicate with each other. You may have to initiate the discussion but that will show him you're serious about how he feels. Have you also talked to your OBGYN about post partum & the discomfort? Sounds like that needs to be addressed as well. 2 weeks is early for you to feel that much pressure from your husband for sex. You have 2 kids & just had surgery..OBGYN's give advice about emotional issues as well as personal. Do something for yourslef to feel better. When your husband gets home tell him to watch the kids so you can bathe & get dressed..you will feel better.

Like Julie I just tell it like it is. Dh needs to realize that his need for "release" can wait till you are properly healed from MAJOR surgery! It's not like he's new to the parenting game.
Make an appt with your OB and take him with you. Talk about what you want to talk with the doctor about with Dh before you go.
2 weeks is WAY too soon to be having intercourse! If the pain you are having is more then just soreness when trying to move get your post partum rump to the doc soon! I had 2 c-sections because my boys were simply too big to my body to deliver thru the tunnel so they had to come out thru the attic access-LOL.
My Dh was actually the complete opposit of your's. He was scared of hurting me the first time we had sex after our 2nd was born. It was me who was at the point of "we're doing IT, and we're doing IT NOW".
You've got to talk with him about this before it causes real trouble for yall. Sometimes, men just don't get how exhausting pregnancy, delivery and recovery actually are for us. Right now your hormones are freaking out just as bad as your body is from the delivery. Most people forget that as we age we don't bounce back from any type of medical issue like we used to. I know that the 5 year gap between my kids sure showed during my recovery of the last kid.