How to Address Bullying

It's interesting this comes up ... just reconnected with an old elementary school classmate on FB yesterday and talked about the bullying I endured in 6th and 7th grade. My parents did all they could -- talked to the teacher, talked to the administrators. My dad was head of the PTA, so we were already active in the school, but even then, the bullying persisted. My parents were awesome and put our house on the market, researched other school districts and moved us to an area with the best test scores. Once I was at a school with other academically oriented kids, I blended in and there was no bullying at all. In fact, my life really turned around. I would do the same thing for my own kids.
P.S. I got some satisfaction from this classmate in hearing that the leader of the clique that bullied me horribly ended up with an awful life in the end. I normally don't smile at that, but this girl was rotten to the core. Karma. :)

As a teacher all I can say is that some bullying is so under the radar that I can't do anything about it. It's so frustrating!!! When I hear about it, I immediately take steps to stop it, go to the administrations, take steps to empower the victim, etc. We are dealing with this at my school and it is 90% girls. As long as you as a parent advocate for your kids and empower them to identify and stop the bullying, it will get better. Bully's rely on silence from their victims.

I was picked on, too...so I talk with my 5th grade daughter often about BOTH sides of bullying. I let her know that I want her to come talk to me if it happens to her (I didn't ever tell my mom when it was happening), and I want her to be constantly aware of how SHE is treating others. My daughter tends to be a cameleon, so I keep a close eye on who she choses as her friends and how they treat others. I worry often about my daughter falling in with a group of "mean girls"

My parents put us in Karate and told us to defend ourselves if anyone bullied us and that I should protect anyone else we see being bullied. This is exactly what I am doing with my kids as well. And if they get expelled for defending themselves or someone else I will take them to Disneyland and throw them a party. As far as fitting in - its totally overrated. Character matters first. A person with strong character rarely fits into the lemming masses. You teach your kids to have moral and physical courage and the rest will take care of itself.

I wasn't bullied, but endured the teasing and general meaness that middle school and high school girls can dish out on occasion. I'm so sorry for the bullying you had to learn to live with and the way your parents handled the situation. I was an elementary teacher for 7 years and never allowed bullying of any kind in my classroom and my students knew it. My school had a no tolerence policy when it came to bullying and it was strict and enforced, but that was only elementary. I can't speak for the middle and high schools. Hopefully, if we start early, we can carry through to the upper grades, too. My son's school talks openly about bullying, for which I'm grateful, and I believe every parent has the responsibility to talk with their own kids about what it is and how to handle it. Thanks for bringing up an important topic.

I wasn't bullied until my senior year of high school, but man, was it intense. It was all psychological, not physical, but it was bad. Thank heavens it was all before facebook or my space! My mom even considered sending me to live with my older sister and finish high school in another city, it got so bad. My parents stayed on top of it as much as they could. The sad part was that some of my friends didn't want to "choose sides," even though I didn't start the conflict. One friend overheard some of the brunt of it and was so appalled, he did become a staunch supporter. I mostly ignored it to the extent I could, and when I struck back, it was sweet. (I got the bully's dream date to our homecoming dance, which intensified the bullying afterwards, but oh, was it worth it--he was a really nice guy and I felt a bit bad for asking him to take me to homecoming as a means of getting back at her, but he and I did have a lot of fun at the dance since we were just there as friends.)

Anyway, I still remember it and I guess you could say that there are scars. However, I'm living a great life now, and I think the bully is, too. I know for a fact that she didn't get some of the high school honors she wanted because the teachers were so annoyed by her campaign of harassment against me. One of them told my mom that directly. It's like another teacher said below--there are acts below the radar that they can't necessarily combat, but that doesn't mean they don't know what's going on.

My niece was bullied more directly with threatening texts, so my brother was able to copy those and take them to the school and show them to the principal. He also called the parents of the other girls and told them that if his daughter showed up with so much as a scratch on her (because the threats were physical in nature), he would press charges against their kids with their own texts being evidence. That ended the problem instantly.

Anyway, this is long, but I promise you I keep a close eye on my child for signs of bullying and I will absolutely step in if I ever have to.

It is amazing to me how early bullying starts. I don't remember dealing with it until junior high age. My son is in preschool and we have already had issues with a bully.