ok so my bf was over last night Emmy had been asleep for 2 hours, should be safe for fun right? and we were starting to have fun (not even starting, clothes were J. starting to come off), and I hear her come to the bedrom door, he was there when she went to bed, but he doesnt sleep over and I'm not ready for her to know we were in the bedroom together (We've discussed that he won't sleep over until we're talking about moving in in the very near future)...so i J. quickly yell "i'm gettin changed i'll tuck u back in in a sec , get back in yourbed sweetie" so she wouldnt be at the door when i opened it and see him in there. BUT what do i do if she ever does catch us, what preventivie measures do you take to not get caught, and if you did what would you say? This is mostly for people either that have a bf or husband thats ot the father to their kid (s)Oh shes 5 if that matters, and I don't plan on getting caught and plan on taking all preventative measures, but it freaked M. out, we waited 2 hours before continuing
Julie: I also saw in one of your questions you were thwing a shower for your sons GIRLFRIEND and not wife, what happened to your high morals you showed him, since obviously you think sex before marriage is bad??
added to above- i don't think it's hitting below the belt (maybe a little...i feel bad but don't want to take it down, b/c then i'd be cheating)b/c i wouldn't look down on the above that happened..i dont think anything bad of her kid for having a kid unwed, i'm J. saying i think she would by that response, i don't tend to judge people...i was J. saying, her response was that i was going to teach my kid that that would be ok, and shes old school so her kids werent taught that way, so i was J. stating obviously she didn't suceed...although i don't think anythings wrong with not being married...abviously i'm not=)
i agree bedroom and locked doors, but what if you forget to lock it? and also what if they catch u making out on the couch...obviously if it got heated youd move to a bedroom but did you not even kiss in areas unlocked? Dawn I agree I'm going to triple check it and become OCD on it
Julie although I would love to get to know such a HIGHLY MORAL person as you, you didn't read I'm NOT hiding he's in the house, I J. don't want her to ever see him in my bedroom until we're living together. Since he's not sleeping there until then, there would be times where were having fun while she sleeps, and if you hold out until you're married and thats your advice for M., I'd say I'm glad you chose that way of life I respect it but its not for M., although that doesn;t mean I'm promiscueous(sp)
Lock the doors! LOL But if she does catch him in the bedroom, tell her you guys were talking or having some time together. I think it's okay to leave it at that.
Well first of all, your hiding him being there because you know it's wrong, I'm old school so I still believe in morals and values and setting good ones for our children. But sense that's not the case with you, J. lock your door. J.
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J. lock the door and holler GO AWAY! LOL J. kidding, shouldnt do that with a little one. Works great for teenagers! (they holler EEEWWW thru the door now LOL) .... Agree with teaching her about closed doors.
I cant say I blame you for part of your response to Julie, because you didnt ask for opinions on sex before marriage. You didnt ask DAD about how to know your man is commited to you either! But it was a "sinking to their level" when you took a shot at her about her son's pregnant girlfriend. I know she shot first but you could have chosen to ignore it or send it in a pm.
If you forget to lock it, your SOL! It happens. It happened to my husband and I yesterday afternoon. There was a flurry of covers, and my husband told my son to get out, mommy was helping him 'stretch out his back (huh?!?)' and we would be out in a minute.
You forget to lock? You deal with it and come up with something real quick!
MIne J. heard noise. Thru our locked door (hers was open). Apparently we were loud or she has "spidey senses"??
I heard "Momma, are you Ok?". "Uh...yes baby girl I am fine, go back to sleep" (she was in her room, maybe 10 feet down the hall from our door, in her upper bunk bed, about age 4).
Then "Momma, are you hurt"...something like that. "Nope, go back to sleep". Then..."But Momma, I keep hearing uh, uh uh uh. Are you sure you are OK?".
OMG...we giggled so loud after that she was sure she was missing out on something!
Common sense of the adult kind. Use it.
Wow......what a judgemental reply down there! LOL
Now that your daughter can surprise you at any given moment, it's best not to do anything where there isn't a locked door. Especially at age 5!!!! I still remember walking in on my grandparents! Yucky!!!! Not sure what age I was but my mom was a teen mom and my grandparents were still getting it on!
I tried to teach my daughter that when a door is closed, she needs to knock first and wait for permission to enter. Majority of the time she'll do that, she'll J. whine at the door "Mommy!! Come on! I want to come in too!" or "Mommy... what are you and Daddy doing?" LOL it's really quite hilarous at times. We co-sleep so sex at night isn't our thing, we try to fit in some times while she's watching a movie, or completely out of the house.
She's walked in a few times because she knocked and walked right in. What we did was have my body cover her Dad's so that she didn't see something in a function she's not ready for - but she's used to seeing my body nude. Of course we stopped what we were doing immediately and it completely killed the mood even after she left. Oh well, it's J. sex.
I have to laugh reading this.... only because it happened last night!
Our house is old and set up funny. We both hate it because the previous owner literally cut an opening in the wall to make a "door way" into the next room. There is no way to put a door on it because they didn't even do it where studs are next to it.. anyways, that's our two youngest kids room. Last night our daughter woke up and said what your you doing? I have to go potty right now, daddy stop wrestling with mommy and take M. please. We both about died laughing and it obviously killed the mood!
Anyways... you handled it correctly. There is no way to prevent them from waking up and coming to your door. We don't have any locks on our bedroom doors, so J. teach them to knock before coming in ( unless its a hole in the wall like our back "door" is). Before my husband and I were married he never slept over until we moved in together, but did have our "fun" after they went to bed. One time one of the kids came upstairs and I quickly threw the covers over him so they wouldn't see him in bed before I opened the door when they knocked.
I always keep a fan going in our room and thier rooms J. to make sure it covers any noise that might be made.
As far as making out on the couch, there is nothing wrong with showing affection and if your child walks in and asks what your doing, all you have to do is explain that you showing him how much you love him. I would never hide it.. obviously in front of the kids its low key, but if they were sleeping and walk in that's what I would do.
