How Do Keep My House Organized Without Doing All the Work Myself

Flylady.net is a wonderful website. She has a schedule for the week and also has jobs for the kids to do. She bases her timing to 15 minute intervals for doing a job. The best thing about her is that it is free. When you sign up for the emails have them come as one message rather than 15 or so a day.

Hello. I too am very organized. This is what I did to help with the kids clutter and husband! I bought each one of them a see through tote. Nice size. I told them that they had 2 days to put their favorite keepsakes (cards, school papers, awards, etc.)in their box. If after 2 days it still wasn't put up then in the trash it goes. And when they get to HS years it was fun to have them get their box out and go thru it and remember. I also had a smaller tote for the special cards, mothers day, fathers day etc.
Just give them a time limit on how long things "sit" before they do something with it- or you will think it doesn't matter and throw it away. Believe it worked for my family!
Good luck!
D.

M.,
My son is just a baby, but I've heard of friends who have tried the chore/rewards system and it worked...you put the chart up with each chore each person in the house (including mom and dad, so kids don't think certain things are just for granted part of the adult duty)with "general" household chores and also their individual chores: i.e. one child plays soccer, must put their soccer things away in certain time frame, or they don't get the rewards that many children take for granted, like plopping down on the couch as soon as they come home and kick off their shoes. Keep from making rewards things that could become bad habits such as candy and make them every day things that should be, like playing with certain toys and such. That's the adult training coming in, even though many adults still do that, there really are some who actually do that...yeah, I'm still working on me and my husband to do that too! Hope that helps...

Hi M.,
I also find it highly distracting to have clutter left laying around. Three things that have helped me with my children and husband...First- I pick up after my husband, if it is an area that bothers me because I will see it all the time, such as the main living areas. I know it isn't a big deal for him, it bothers me, so I cover him and our relationship by just doing it. As I pick it up I also guard my heart and thoughts. He loves me, just doesn't realize how much it bothers me. I will show my love by just doing it and letting him completely off the hook.
Secondly, with my kids - their spouses will appreciate if we teach/train them to pick up their clutter. By having regular times of having everyone run through and pick their stuff up in the main living areas I have at least been able to keep the clutter issue in part. (my kids are older now - college- and they do make fun as I call for these times when they are home, but they quickly do it and then tell me stories of how they have turned out like me in this area) I do let my kids have the freedom with their rooms and only require a complete clean up once a month....where everything is dusted and cleaned up. If we don't do the once a month their rooms become overwhelming and they struggle with managing. I let them know that this is the week and by next Sunday I expect all rooms to have been thoroughly cleaned.

Lastly, when I am iritated with their mess, and BEFORE I ask them to remove it, I work hard to remind myself that one day I will miss their mess and it will not matter - they are of much more value than their mess...this point was nailed home when I went to stay with my mom for a week after she had surgery. I was cleaning her house one day and was utterly amazed at how organized each closet, under the bed, storage areas and kitchen cabinets and pantry were. There were many plastic containers with many labels everywhere. My mother has always been a "cleaner" and I have attributed my need for neat from her, but I didn't realize how organized she likes to have her life. When I asked her about it, she told me that with 6 kids it would of driven her nuts to try to maintain that level of organization. Now she can do it without headache. When she had kids, she decided what was most important to her and that is where she concentrated and enforced with us. She knew that she would have plenty of time for organization later.
I think of her often and remind myself that I will have an opportunity to have it in perfect order again - and I will probably miss their little messes then and beg them to bring the grandkids over!
Blessings,
L.

Dear M.,

I feel your pain! There must be some middle ground here though. Sometimes you have to give a kid a little space in their own room to "mess up" a little. Once you show them where things go it's up to them to put them away or suffer the consequences of not being able to find their things later. If you pick up your children's things and put them away for them they will not learn. Instead go shopping with the child for containers, files, crates, etc. to put things in. My children have a large keepsake box that goes under the bed. It had treasured art projects, blue ribbons, and keepsakes from school. Periodically we go through that box and cull out things that aren't as "treasured" as we once thought they were. It gives the kids a place to put those odd things that just don't seem to have a place.
As far as the calendar for the husband....that has to stop! You can't treat your husband like a child. Ask him politely to put something away and if he doesn't do it ask him politely again. Don't keep "score" or he'll start resenting you for your organization and a power struggle may ensue. That's how marriages break down - over the simpliest of things. It's just not worth putting tension into a marriage. You'll have to do a little give and take on your part to keep the harmony. If you have to put his things away once in a while for him. It's just a way to say "I love you" without being a control freak.

Hi M., I am a Professional Organizer and get asked this question all the time by those who are craving organization, and are running into resistant spouses and children. You are NOT alone on this one, I promise! About a year ago, when I encountered a particularily stubborn spouse :) I solicted opinions and ideas from fellow Organizers, about thier experiences, take and tips in this area and compiled quite a few of them along with my own.

There have been so many great ideas that members have touched on, which is why I love this site.
Such as 1)It is essential that there is a place for everything and that the system is not overly complicated for others to use. 2)Cleanliness and organization are not one and the same. 3)The important balance that is necessary in trying to not be an enabler and thereby creating dependent spouses and children, while trying to not be a doormat and feeling like the maid and major nag! 4)The old lightbulb joke about how many Psychologists does it take to to change a light bulb is true.
Just one. But it has to WANT to change :)Sometimes, you can not change people, but you CAN change your attitude about it!

If you (or others) are interested in a more in-depth disscussion or tips on this topic. I would be happy to provide a workshop/seminar! I provide seminars to non-business groups at a very minimal cost - mostly to cover gas, printed materials, and a few giveways or items to take home if applicable. Generally around $10-$15 per person depending on topic, venue and if there are specific requests for additional materials or products/handouts by the group.
Best of Luck to you!

S. J.
Simply Organized by S.
www.organizedbysandy.com
www.simplyorganizedbysandy.blogspot.com

Ok miss organized!!! It's time you started delegating jobs to each person in the house. The older ones can pick up and put away. The little one can make beds and such. Hubby, well, you can train him, too. Some people have told their children that they will pick and put it in a trash bag to be taken out.

As long as you do the work, they won't. There will be times when you want to pull your hair out, but you have to let them do it. Are you going to go to their homes and pick up after them when they are 25 and older? I hope not.

People now days have different terms of tidiness. You may have to learn to ease up on your expectations as they are not you. As the book says, don't stress the small stuff. The other S.. P.S. I used to be a suppermom and do it all and work and stopped. I didn't get to enjoy my family for the people there are. All they could see was a person who was constantly fussing about something not in its place and the the mess around the house. If you don't like it in the living room throw it in their rooms and shut the door. End of story. The other S..

Lighten up. Sounds like you are too much of a perfectionest. There is a middle ground, you want perfect, and so long as it isn't a pig sty, the middle is where you need to try and be. You don't want to be known as just a nag, and not ever enjoy your husband or family. One the other hand they do need to pick up after theirself, & you not do it all. If you are a calander girl, notice if you are extra (clean/organized) around your cycle, and try to not let it get to you then. If they keep their stuff out of living room, and don't keep their own room perfect. Shut the door so you don't have to look at it, life is too short to be stressed because it isn't all like TV

Check out FlyLady.net and the book Sink Reflections.

These have really changed my stinkin' thinkin' and helped me so much.

L.

M.,

Our family sounds much like yours! I love to be organized and put together, but my family doesn't seem to appreciate it the same way I do, in that they don't actively participate in it the same way. So...we have a few organizational tips that I've picked up here and there that I could share with you.

1. 27 item pickup. Every day, each member of the family picks up 27 random items that need to be put away. When everyone participates, it takes less than 15 minutes to pick up and organize.

2. 15 minute cleanup drills. On the whiteboard in our hallway, I write down all the rooms or areas that need to be cleaned. Each member of the family picks a room/area and for 15 minutes on the timer, they work on it. After 15 minutes, everyone rotates their chore to something else. This way, no one gets overburdened or complains that they ALWAYS have to clean such and such.

These are the two tips that help me the MOST. I hope this blesses you.

Remember, the family that cleans together....gets it done faster!

I know exactly how you feel. I have three kids and another on the way and I am in super organization cleaning mode right now. I don't know what to do about the husband, if you figure it out please let me know, but the kids . . . for the summer i set them up with a chart. There are some very minor "chores" they do a few times a week that are to help maintain the house. I have also put on their chart what they must do to maintain their own things. Its simple things like make sure their rooms are cleaned up and that all their belongings from around the house are put away. The key for us is that they know not to ask to swim, watch TV, play video games, do art projects etc until their list is fulfilled. It works because they are maintaining things throughout the week, so picking up is a 10 minute job maximum. They can also do their jobs on their own schedule. My girls get up and get it all done first thing while my son stalls a bit. Its their choice, but the fun doesn't start until its done. Anyway, works for us. Hope it helps out a bit.

Hi, My name is Tonia. I organize for people and would be happy to help you. I myself have gone through this. The solution is to find something to help them organize those specific areas. Like something to hang stuff animals, a shelf on the wall to put those plaques & baseballs on in cubes (my dad makes those long shelves that are the length of the wall for my baseball players), a container for their papers, ect.. If you need further assistance don't hesitate to call. I will be glad to help you. I charge $15 an hour to organize & clean in the Ft Worth area and $20 for outside of Ft Worth.

Thank you,
Tonia ###-###-####
____@____.com

M.-

Organization is the key to running a household but it can't be all up to you. To make it worth more for you kiddos, let them have ownership over their organization ways. You can let them decorate or color their containers as well as help label the containers. Ask them where they think the items go. This is giving them the owership of organizing their stuff and helping you. If you do everything for them, they will not learn and won't have the desire to. Just remember, when you first start out, it will not always be as perfect as you want it. It will take time for things to sink in, but if you use the same routine with it, then they will get the hang of it. There will be times when things get a little messy but learn to be ok it and remind your family gently.

My own kiddos help with organzing by figuring out where they might need to put things. Of course I help guide them but I let them do most of it since they are 11 and 10. My 2 year old helps pick up---we treat it as a game. I also give them incentives for doing a good job. Incentives will help with wanting to keep their stuff organized. I might let them watch more T.V, play more video games, we might have a night out together, or go see a movie together, etc. I find something that they really would like to do and let them know that we first have to clean up before we do anything.

I am also a teacher and found this very effective when setting up my room. I love to have things just perfect, but doesn't help the kids. I let them help organize things in my classroom. They are more willing to help keep the room clean as well as remember where things go.

Good luck. I hope everything works out for you.

Hi M.,

You've gotten some great responses so far. I grew up in a very cluttered, dusty home and so I am a neat freak. With 2 toddlers and a messy husband, I have had to prioritize.

I first want to tell you that you have to accept the way in which your kids help. They may do it differently and not exactly the way you wanted it done. However, if you tell your children, "Put the legos in the box." And they put them in the box, but don't close the lid or put the box on the shelf, don't get upset. Praise them. Then ask them to cover up the box and put the box on the shelf. I used to get upset with my daughter until I realized that she had done exactly what I had asked, but she hadn't read my mind!

Secondly, I have had to let the house be messy during the day. Never a food mess, but toys and arts & crafts can be left out. When hubby comes home, there is play time in the playroom while someone makes dinner. Just before dinner is served, everyone has to clean up together. We end the day and start the next with a clean house!

Good luck,
M.
http://onenaturalmother.blogspot.com/

Check out FlyLady.com it has really helped me and my family keep an organized home... and I am working less than ever!

If you figure it out, let me know I am in the same boat. My husband is one to just shove stuff in any empty hole instead of where it belongs and I spend so much time trying to find things.

You are not alone.

Go on to flylady.net. She has lots of great ideas on how to keep your family on board. I have used her suggestions through the years, and it works. But I think the number one thing you need to remember is that not everyone is organized by nature, and if they are not, your expectations may be too high. I know i have to really work on that all the time. Also, remember that there is more to life than having a perfectly clean and organized house. I realize that you're trying to train them for adulthood, but believe me, there are lots more important things to be stressing to your children than keeping a perfectly tidy room, etc. And I'm not pointing the finger. The reason I can say all this is because I have a 25, 15 and 13 year old and have been there, done that!

Get the book Love and Logic, the mess will become your kids and husbands problem, not yours. B.

You may have already heard of this, but check out www.flylady.net for great tips and encouragement on all that comes with keeping a home organized and clean. It's good for unorganized people as well as organized people with unorganized families. :)

I've got the cure! I tend to not want to throw memorabilia things away- I have very little from my past and want my kids to have it for when they are older. I have what we call "memory boxes"- once something has been out and doesnt really need to be out anymore but doesnt seem to fit the garbage department...we pop it in a large plastic bina nd mark the year on it- I have ones from when they were little- ths papers from school- art projects that I couldnt part with....etc. I also have one for me and my husband- mothers day cards, notes from the kdis- etc. Once day I may scrapbook it all or just glance through it. When we moved- I had about 12 of them and one toppled over and we sat for a few hours reminiscing and at that point I was glad I had them. As for achievement letters, certificates- get a binder for each child & 8x11 plastic covers- they get organizes and are kept for the future.

Its hard but- labeling areas helps as well. Whenever i see a mess and its needs to be handled b/c i have comapny coming wtc and if they arent around- it goes intoa a laundry basket for them to sort thru- No one leaves til the chores are done--lol

Homerun baseballs- plastic holder and a nice area for trophys -plaques etc
Stuffed animals and things they outgrow- pick a family day- bring clothes first to plato's closet- see what money they can get then charity-- stuffed animals- that food processor you never use and dads old shorts- go to charity- tax deduction and a feel good moment.

In the big picture- ya gotta choose the battles and if it's not in your way and it doesnt bother them- let it go and wait til your cycle is over to talk about it- HA!

Good luck!

D. Sansone
P.S. When you have a party and need someone to help keep it all together and organized and food out and areas clean and guest waited on---
Party Angels Ltd. www.partyangelsus.com ###-###-####

I like all the answers so far. The thing though is you probably have to much stuff to begin with. I know we do. I have been doing a purging. Did the pots and pans today, the plastics cabinet. I like my plastics put away with the matching lid so I don't have to search for the pair everytime. But others, who shall remain nameless, don't see the importance of said system. But I am prevailing now. I got rid of mismatched ones, missing lids, or missing bowls. Got rid of several old pans and cookie sheets we just don't need. Same with appliances. So I think that you need to really decide what you need, get rid of what you don't and stop buying things. As FlyLady says "You can't organize clutter."
We also have a chore chart in our house. The kids are responsible for several things and they are on their chore chart. They have been the same things since they were 3 years old. Like make your bed, put your dirty clothes away, personal hygeine etc. Their allowance depends on them doing their "job" and their "boss" doesn't like workers that don't do their "jobs", and then they don't get paid. Just like in the real world. They also do extra stuff around the house when directed. Like we have clean the living room day, and they help vacuum etc. on top of the things on the chore chart. I have also learned to relax my standards some. After all, they won't remember if the house was a little messy, but they will remember all the years I whined and nagged, and yelled at them. And I don't want those to be the memories they have.
We do a "room round-up" twice a day, once in morning and once at night. We run around for like 10 minutes and put everything in its place and tidy up. NOT clean, tidy up. YOu can do it before dessert and when they are done with the room round-up then you guys come in for some dessert works everytime in this house. I have each person a persnoal hamper. I don't sort clothes by color, but by person. I don't bleach socks or underwear as they get holes or are outgrown to quickly. Then when the load is done. I fold it and that person puts it away. I sort accidental pieces going into the washer, treat for spots, wash and dry. I do all towels and sheets together whenever I have a load. Etc, I am sure you get the picture. I even try to do a person on a particular day. We have 5 people in the family. Plus towels. So if I do one load a day, then I am done. Unless it is blankets and extra stuff. We have enough clothes for 7 days to be in the hamper. Before the 7 day mark there is not enough dirty clothes for a full load. So, it works out very well. I also allow few happy meal toys. They are to expensive in that format anyway. We usually get a different meal at a cheaper price. And the toys are junk...so I keep it from coming into the household.
I also discipline for chores not being done, as well as no allowence. You will be surprised what motivation that will bring. From loss of priveledges, grounding, confiscating offending article found lying around, pretending like I am throwing it away and when desperate---spanking. I also reward when we have done alot. We had banana splits tonight because they helped me with the kitchen and the sorting, AND we rented them a movie. Even though the help was mandatory. They have also learned that they need at least a decent attitude to boot.
If you don't help them understand how to keep things picked up, clean and organized-----How can you expect them to be successful adults? They will not apprectiate what they are given, don't take care of it, and don't respect their things much less other peoples things. Kids are given so much, why take care of it, we will just get another one is a common mentality. Things are so disposable these days. It is hard to teach them respect, gratitude, and accountability. But I try. And I think the root of many of those lessons start at home, in exactly the situation you described.
My 13.5 year old can cook, clean, start laundry, mow, weed eat, do light maintenance etc. He even taught my hubby how to start the new front loading washer and dryer. Hubby hasn't had to know that until last week, so our son came to the rescue when I wasn't home.
I hope all that helps even if I ramble a bit. I think you should be a little more relaxed but remain focused.
Good luck,
L.

Hi M.,
I am sure that you are frustrated. I am just learning to pick up things and I am 30...my poor husband. He grew up in an immaculate home and has been very patient with me. My mother is wonderful and loving and sweet but she did always pick up FOR me as opposed to having me do it. This was probably partially my fault because I was a little brat but I am sure she was at times too tired to be consistent with me because she worked outside of the home. I am a mother who stays at home and it is amazing to see that if I am consistent and follow through with my 18 month old daughter that she helps clean up. She has even begun, of her own volition, to pick trash up off the ground and throw it away. I know that this is only because my husband and I show her over and over.

You are obviously a fabulous example to your family so you don't need to improve in that department. Perhaps you could put more consistent energy into helping them clean up after themselves. Don't push your hubby too much, that may only cause tension. But with you children, glue yourself to them as they are supposed to do a task and don't give up. Stick with them until they complete the task. Just don't be mean or arrogant about it. Be loving and encouraging and, if you can, continue to be patient. When they do something right, praise them like they just ran a marathon. Be positive.

It sounds like they are old enough to understand communication. You and your husband could try to sit down with them and have them think about things that are important to them. Then explain to them that you believe that a tidy, organized house is important, not only for you but for the whole family. It just feels better.

Best wishes,
A.

I agree it is good to find a place for everything and keep it in that place. My husband taught me this and I am still working on using that philosophy. However, when a family takes in as many "treasures" as ours do, it is not a reality. Train the family and let go. My husband is similar to you in that he puts things away, I let them sit sometimes for about 16 days after receiving it. It used to bother him quite a bit. Now, he has come to deal with it. We do institute a clean up and throw out time where we all work together to decrease the clutter. In fact, right now I am cleaning off the dining room table with the trash can close by and deciding which school made things we can just not live without. Those get filed and the rest gets looked at one more time and then out it goes.

I am a very organized person also. It has driven me crazy that my family (husband, Daughter 6, Son 3) did not mind have clutter around them also. Oh yeah! I am a married single parent most of the time and I work a full time job volunteer at school when I can and do partipate in my daughters cheerleading and girl scouta acitivities among other stuff. Anyways! A guy I worked with had this probelm with his wife. He started laying all his wifes stuff on her side of the bed so when it was time to get into bed she always had to move it. Now she puts her stuff away. I did something similar. I just threw everything on my husband side of the bedroom. It does bother me to see it there but as long as you pick up after him he will expect you to do it. Have you ever heard the saying "we teach people how to treat us". Well by you always catering to them. They will always expect you to do so. I personally bribe my kids to clean their rooms and help out. With stickers or a sucker or to watch a show they really want to watch. I haven't quite got my husband trained yet but I see him working on his side of the room more when he is home. The kids just do it, so they can get what they want. Usually it is something cheap or a show I would rather not watch but hey. Gotta do what you gotta do. Hopes that helps.

I can relate! Sometimes what works for me in regards to getting the kids to pick up is that I remind them that it needs to get done and if I have to do it then the less time I have to do fun things with them or take them places. Another strategy I've heard of is throwing out the toys they leave laying around. Warn them first and give them a chance to pick them up. If they don't clean up by a certain time, bag up what's out and throw it away or hide it so they think you threw them away. As far as the hubby helping out...I wish I had some good advice to give. Mine is the same as yours and he even complains about the clutter on the counters! I purchased 2 nice baskets from Container Store so all of the piles would be consolidated and somewhat hidden and he won't use his. I end up gathering his piles and putting them in the basket. It's funny when he is looking for something and all I have to say is "look in the basket". You think he'd get the idea!! hd

Hi M.! Please sign up for the emails from Flylady.net. You will feel overwhelmed by the amount of emails at first, but if you stick with it, you will begin to see a difference in your home.

I am a professional organizer. Clutter is the thing that most of my customers struggle with on a daily basis. Learn to keep a mindset of giving it away on Freecycle.org or selling it on Craigslist.com or Ebay.com or somewhere else if haven't used it in the last year. That relates especially to clothes, shoes, or really anything. Just get it out of your house and out of your life.

With papers, keep a mindset that mail has to "earn" it's way into your home. Stand over your trash can when the mail comes and purge it before it ever has a chance to land on a countertop or desk. Keep all your bills in one spot and pay them on time. You will feel so free! All other papers, try to handle them ONE time. When you get it, put important dates on your calendar. Something you need to call about? Put it next to your phone and do it ASAP. A letter that needs a response? Put it on your computer keyboard so the next time you sit down, you will write that letter. Adopt the Nike slogan "Just DO It!".

Make chores fun for your kids. Reward them with little things like playing a board game with them once their clothes are hung up. Or take them to the park once all their toys are in their proper place.

Assign each of your kids a color. Then, get them hangers, one bathroom towel to use each day, perhaps even a plate, cup, bowl, and silverware that color. Then, you will ALWAYS know who didn't pick up their stuff when they were done. This is a magical step for some homes.

It's easy to become a martyr about doing it all yourself. But no one wants to live with a martyr. Just get everyone to help and don't redo it when they're done. They will only learn that they aren't perfect enough for you and that hurts their self-esteem. Let them try and fail or try and not do it perfect. Either way, let them see that helping is necessary and not painful. It's part of life unfortunately.

Good luck! B. Walker P.
~Organization Unlimited, LLC. ###-###-####~

Wow, you have gotten some great advise on letting go, organizing etc... However there was one bit of advise I didn't see, but as a Mom of 3 grown boys, I hate to be the bearer of bad news. :-( You will be telling, asking, begging for them to clean until they leave; yes, the 10 to 18 years will be like this,(GASP) so I suggest you pace yourself. There is a book by Dr A. Hart, "thrilled to death" about too much stimulation, so if it will help with chores I suggest turning off the t.v., computer, radio and having them do chores and sit down with them and read a good book, or have family devotions, board games, etc...and enjoy them while you can. May you pick your battles well.

M. -
Try www.flylady.NET or www.flylady.COM - she has both sites nowadays and has an amazing way of looking at the pieces of your home and getting a little done each day so that life doesn't overwhelm you - and for getting the family involved. I think it will be a blessing to you. I read the other posts and I know it's already been said, but sometimes hearing it more than once gives it some weight. :) I agree with the "other Suzanne" too - you don't want your family to think of you just as the lady who rides them all the time about the house - you want to enjoy them and you want them to enjoy you! Have a blessed day!
S.

Have you tried giving the kids a place to have a mess? Like their room or the laundry room or something. I know it is hard to have something be not picked-up, try to not think of it as yours.
My mother once did laundry baskets, each of the kids got a laundry basket in the livingroom;all our things went into our basket, homework, toys, school projects, sticks from outside whatever. At the end of each day she cleaned the livingroom and threw everything not in a basket away-yes she threw away homework-hairbrushes-you name it.
But we kept things clean after that happened-at least we cleaned up afterward.

You might need to relax your standards (that said, I need to tighten mine LOL) and try not to be supermom/expect perfection in your world and from yourself.

Finding homes for the things to live in is the key, and making sure they get there - the homes have to be logical, etc. so that it's easy to put things away, and it makes sense to put them where they belong. Flylady.net - a great resource for moms/families, etc. They even have child specific tools/strategies. Take care :)

We have a smaller home & since we're expecting a third child we had to get organized & all the clutter put up. We put shelves up on the walls in our living & dining rooms, as well as our two children's rooms. I wrote out a list of things I wanted to store on these (office supplies, sewing implements, school papers etc) & found boxes & bins for that stuff & put those on the shelves. In the kids' rooms we put toys on the shelves and in bins under the shelves. My eldest daughter has a big stuffed animal collection, so I got long plastic tubs with lids & wheels that fit under her bed. My husband has tons & tons of CDs which generally get put down & forgotten...we got four inexpensive wooden shoe organizers from Target, two stacked on two and nailed into a wall in our bedroom; the CDs fit awesomely in these & anytime I find a CD lying around I just slide in it one of the shoe cubbies. We've got a tall chest of drawers in the dining room, decorated nicely on top with pretty lamps and pictures; in the drawers is all kinds of stuff. IKEA sells some awesome drawer organizer cubes which fit perfectly in it. We have LOADS of childrens books, some of which are on shelves and others are in laundry baskets under the shelves. We have a large front closet, into which went a couple of Target wire storage cubes and all kinds of things are in there: food, holiday decorations, outside toys, etc. If my husband leaves things lying around I throw 'em in his closet; I don't have to look at the stuff, he can take care of it when he gets to it & I don't b*tch at him. :) Works for everyone.

Our house has been SO MUCH clearer now that we have places to PUT our things. My two year old's room even stays tidy! The girls LOVE their shelves and have taken pride in the way they look. They aren't beautiful and after the girls get older I'd like my home to be a bit prettier, but for now it's functional and not nearly so cluttered. And I am LOVING functional and uncluttered. It was a long process for us, finding what we could afford and what would work but it's so much nicer to be home now. We don't argue as much, I don't dread coming home...it's just a happier place to be.

Good luck to you!

Put a basket on the counter or whereever you fill comfortable for your children's papers. Go through them either daily or once a week or... then if they are of no significance, shred. Homerun balls, plagues... designate a shelf or enclosed bookcase. An enclosed bookcase will eliminate dusting! Maybe after six months or a year, box the awards up and put them in the attic. Stuffed animals get a hamper in each bedroom closet and place the stuffed animals. Might want to clear the stuffed animals and give the discards to the hospital to give to sick children. But wash them first:)

Also, give one warning if things are not picked up by a certain time frame, you will pick them up and the item will be placed in a garage sale box. This will teach them to pick up after themselves.

Good luck.

Just keep them practicing organization on a daily basis. Eventually it will be second nature for everyone to take something out, and put it back in its place. It helps when dad is on board, too to help get everyone into practice.

Good Luck!

most likely yes you will have to do it yourself, kids can have assigned duties or chores so can husbands but doesnt mean they will get them done like you would you might seek counseling or help because you can either live life and enjoy it or spend it fretting and worring complaining about everthing thats not gettin done, and make everybody miserable life is short and there are no redo's and life is disorganized nothin happens on schedule good luck and god bless

Hi M.,
What a great post! I have learned a lot from reading the responses. I wanted to say that there is a difference between being organized and having a clean house. Basically, I organize where things should go and that makes it easier for my family to clean. For example, as the only female in our 5 person family, I was being overtaken by sporting equipment (baseball bats, gloves, shoes, hats, etc.) as well as legos, action figures, and Happy meal toys. These items were left all over the house b/c there really wasn't a spot for them, so they got dropped whereever. So for me, I needed to be organized in terms of creating a place for these items and trying to train our family to put things there. I got hooks for the garage for the equipment, stackable bins, and a hat racks. Now the cleaning goes faster and is more consistent b/c people know where things are suppose to go. Hang in there!

M.,
The very worst thing you can do for yourself and your family is to do it for them. I realize it is frustrating for you but if you truly want to help them see the value of respecting your need for an orderly home and find interest in it for themselves they have to feel consequences. I highly recommend Love and Logic. It is the BEST program and it even works for adults because it isn't about anger, punishment, or even rewards. It really is all about choices and consequences so you can feel calm and respected and your family can learn.

It has been huge for us. You can find it online and it is offered during the school year in a lot of schools as an evening class for parents.

Good luck and God bless your family,
B. P

your kids should help you and then pay them an allowence that is what my mom did

I know it's already been said, but check out Flylady.net. Not only will it help with keeping up your home, it helps with your attitude. We set the tone and the family will eventually pick up on it. Our family has come a long way, even though it was only me at the beginning. The kids and hubby have started going along with it.

I highly recommend signing up for the emails. They may seem overwheming at first, but once you get the hang of it, it goes pretty fast (I set mine to come into a separate folder)Marla sends out thought-provoking essays, along with reminders and testimonials. Right now they have ideas for a "kids camp" and how to incorporate chores and family fun into the daily routine. Give it a try!

(PS, my dh still hasn't put away his Father's Day gifts!)

Hi M., I feel your pain. What has really helped in my house is having a "chore" sheet for each child. The chores are divided up by the days of the week. Each child knows exactly what he/she is to do on each day of the week. This has really helped me tremendously with the everyday cleaning of the house. My 3 oldest (9, 7, almost 5 yo) have these responsibilities, the younger 2 yo helps where he can. I also pay my kids a "commsission" based on the work that they do. It is not an allowance. We are teaching our children that when you work you get paid, and if you do not work, you do not get paid. (based on the Bible) So, when they do their chores, they get their commission, and if they do not, then they do not get their commission. It works great. Although, I do have to tell them to go do their chores, but they do them. My husband does help in the kitchen and other household things. However, sometimes I have to ask him to help. I have learned through the years, that he cannot "read my mind" therefore, if I just ask, he is willing to help.

With all the papers and stuff in your kids rooms...I keep school papers with me and throw out the ones that I do not want to keep. The special art pictures, I hang in their room or on their door and switch out with new ones that come in. I have a plastic box for each child with their name on it, that I keep papers in that I want to keep for memories. I do go through this box about once a yr and weed out the ones that I have changed my mind about. If my kids ask why I throw something away, I simply tell them, that Mommy cannot keep everything because then our house would be too messy to live in. I also tell them that this way we can have room for another special picture.

Also, before birthdays and Christmas, we go through each child's room and help them get rid of toys that they do not play with anymore. We let them help us and the toys that they choose to get rid of "will go to another little girl/boy to play with." Yes, we do give strong suggestions on what to get rid of and this really helps weed out toys that they do not play with. Sometimes, I give a compromise, such as, "You can keep this, but if you do not play with it by such and such date, then next time we will give it to someone else." This works well. If the room is getting too cluttered, then it is time for another clean out with Mom.

Okay, I know I have been wordy, but I hope this will help you. It really has done wonders for our family and has reduced the stress load on me tremendously. If you would like a copy of our chore sheet, please just email me and I will be happy to pass it on, ____@____.com

On a personal note, what has also helped me tremondously is taking a "stress reducer/anxiety pill". I cannot believe how much I have relaxed about house stuff and other little things that use to drive me crazy. It has really helped me a lot. Please do not be offended by me saying this...I am not saying that you have to have one... just something to think about. It helped my stress level soooooo much.