I was invited to a wedding at the home of a friend I once worked with. According to the invitation the wedding was scheduled from 12:30 to 3:30. I arrived about 12:20 and began visiting with several others when we were approached by a young man in athletic shows and shorts.
To make a long story short, the wedding did not begin until 3:10 and the young man we spoke to before the wedding was the groom! Later we learned the groom did not get dressed for the wedding until the bride was finished. The last 45 minutes of our wait was waitng for him to get back. Why are some people so inconsiderate? Would you have left? My son was coming by to help me with some things around my house at 4.
Let me add that before the wedding there was no food or drink available. Everyone including the children were starving! The wedding was scheduled for 13:30 and food was not served 4:45. What makes people think their big day is yours?
That sounds more odd than inconsiderate.
I wouldn't have left because I would have needed to see how it all worked out.
I assume with a 3:10 start it did end at 3:30, just never heard of having the reception before the wedding.
WOW! i would have been so annoyed, and with the exception of it being someone i was super close to... (even then i would have teased them remorselessly later! LOL) i would have left. and just said, im sorry, but i scheduled around the invitation and have something else today.
Sounds like a good start to a marriage.
/end sarcasm.
Wow, we're planning our vow renewal and the invite says to be there at 5pm. We know our friends, so the renewal won't start until 530-545, but we've got hors d'oeuvres and wine for everyone before the ceremony.
I can't imagine telling people to be there three hours before anything was to begin. I probably would have left if I had something planned. But then again, I don't plan things on days when I have weddings or funerals.
Total lack of preparation on their part but what are you going to do...ask for your money back?? If you absolutely had to leave, you could have. You can't really scold them or their family on their wedding day, they knew they were late.
Although not a wedding the same sort of thing happened to me when I attended a baby shower. I was told it started at 2:00. I get there and it's just me and another woman except for the grandmother-to-be (it was her house) and my SIL (the friend of the mother-to-be). We stood there awkwardly while the backyard was being set up and the food was getting started. I thought maybe my SIL told me 2:00 so I could come help but as I was about to question that the other woman who was there said, "my invitation said 2:00, let me double check." She pulled out the invite - we were not incorrect. I asked if I could help and was told "no, you're a guest, just enjoy yourself......" Shortly after that the grandmother-to-be LEFT the house to go get salsa for the chips!!!!!! Really, a store run now??? Weird to me - but I guess me and the other woman were the weird ones as everyone else knew to show up an hour late to this families events..........(oh, and the father to be showed up in a sweaty 'tank-top' and cut off shorts!!). It was weird!
Anyway - after I had been there 3 hours food was brought out - I left!!!
I would have left after an hour of waiting. That is plain ridiculous.
Weddings do not always go off as planned. I officiated at a wedding that started an hour and a half late. We were scheduled to start at 4 and the bride arrived at 5, we were suppossed to do unity sand and didn't do it at the ceremony then were to do it at the dinner and that didn't happen. I ended up hanging around at the reception trying to find the bride and she had gone home to change into sweats so she could have fun.
But anyway we did the cremony in a park and by the time we started it was starting to get dark and cold. Fall in Wisconsin is not a good time to plan an outdoor wedding.
Sounds like a real lack of planning.
If I had been in your shoes, I probably would have left right after the vows to be home to get on with my life (and extricate myself from that logistical mess)!
No way would I have waited that long. How inconsiderate!
I would have either volunteered to help them get things going. Made suggestions about some drinks and snacks, but I would have kept my appointment.
This couple sounds like a mess.
Chalk it up to ignorance. I didn't know until after I got married that being late was a statement to the other person that my time was more important than theirs. I grew up with "Better late than never" and to just smile. How pathetic is that? I imagine that couple will someday look back and be as horrified as I was when I realized how self-centered I had been all those years.
P.S. I always keep a granola bar in my purse and water in the car since you never know what might come up on any given day.
What was the point of the invitation?
If the stated time was 12:30 to 3:30 and that was the time I had allotted, I would have had to excuse myself and leave (especially with another committment at 4pm). I would ask if I could call later and check on the status of the party and possibly consider returning after my other engagement.
I also would question leaving a gift at that point too as I have always been taught that a gift is usually "payment" for attending the wedding and eating and whatnot.
Sorry about the inconsiderateness of the couple. They should have planned better - especially the getting dressed part!
~C.
I would have said something to some one in regards to the discrepancy between the invitation and the timing of the event. I also do not plan on doing anything the day of a wedding other than attending the event.
The fact that you didn't know you were talking to the groom (in shorts) says that you didn't know the couple well enough to justify waiting 2+ hours for the event to begin. I would have left...and chalked it up to poor planning on their part.
I probably scared some people at my wedding, because I came down the aisle 20 minutes late - I almost passed out and someone ran down to the corner store to get me a soft drink to get some sugar in me! I didn't even know I was running late until I was coming down the aisle and saw the clock in the church!
Come to think of it, no one asked me if I was having "trouble", so I guess I didn't put too many people "out" with my lateness. But this thing of yours is way beyond the bend! No food or drinks while making people wait THAT long? They seriously didn't know what they were doing.
I'm glad that you got fed at some point. I guess that would have been the reason not to leave. However, if I had little children with me, I would have left. Little kids don't follow these kinds of schedules...
Dawn
I probably would have stayed, just to see what happened, but I would have been PISSED! I'm one of those people that puts on the invites, "food served at 5pm but feel free to show up at 4pm if you'd like". That way you know EXACTLY when you are eating and what to expect. I have gone to parties where the invite says 1pm and we get there at 1pm and they are JUST STARTING to set up food, cook, etc. I'm like, really, I'm starving and going to die. Then you eat like 2+ hours later. I hate that. Anyway, I hope the wedding was worth the wait. =)
It would depend on how I was feeling--impatient, annoyed, chill with a couple of glasses of wine in me--and how close I felt to the friend.
No matter what or for whom--30 minutes is my allotted wait time.
I would not have stayed past one thirty. an hour after the wedding should have started would have made me wonder if one backed out, family drama was about to go down, something I surely dont want to be a part of. I also plan that day to be just for the wedding. Its very important day for them as it was for me.
* I was busy running around getting everything in place, telling my flower girl she had to give me back my shoes, I had no idea what time it was. I really thought my brides maids were looking out for me more than they really did. They sent someone to come get me/us I think we were about five mins late. poor hubby walked out at 5 on the dot! waited they started...we should have had a planner or designated someone to alert us of the time. Btw it was major drama on our day. My bridesmaids boyfriend went super crazy, police involved, his priest told him to never ever talk to her again he was life time television for women that morning. I seek a drama free life but it seems to catch me all the time. While I made the most of it and made my dad stick by me (i was scared) it turned out great because I got to spend the day with my dad too!
