Help!! My 6 Year Old Daughter Is Repeatedly Stealing at School...

I understand what you are going through, my daughter,11, started stealing around age 7, however it was my things she was stealing and taking them to school, my rings, $100.00 bills, you name she took it. I don't know of anyone who can help, I haven't gone that far just because I can't afford the expense, but what you are doing is basically all you can do. Have you tried making her apoligize in front of the class instead of writing a note, maybe seeing her classmates looking ashamed at her will help. I get angry because she's 11 now and knows the different between right and wrong, and believe me, every chance I get I remind her of this. So maybe just remind her that if she CHOOSES to do the wrong action then you will Choose to give her a consequence. Make her stand in a corner, not sit, but stand...I don't know, I know this isn't what you wanted to hear but I just wanted to say you are not alone....

My son started the same thing around that age. It started after I got divorced and we didnt have the money we used to. He was used to his dad buying him a car or toy everytime he went to the store. I had to tell him we didnt have the money we had before, and he would have to be happy with what we did have. I tried to scare to him, but it didnt help. I started checking his backpack every day, and still to this day I check it every night. Has anything in your home life changed that would make her feel insecure? He stopped doing it when he felt like we were more stable. He hasnt done it since. I hope you figure it out. Good luck.

It seems to me that there is probably a root cause of her clepto behavior that you should try to discover. Talk with her to see if she is anxious or upset about anything. Maybe this is her way of having power, a real need that all children and adults have.

I would call your insurance company to find out the name of local child psychiatrists that are covered by your insurance. Good luck!

I would try a good scare as well as conseling. After on madison is a good childrens theripist office as well as cross creek on riverside. If you do choose to scare call the juvinile hall or police station and find a cell they can put her in for a few hours, it should scare her pretty bad at that age and show her where she could end up if her stealing continues. If you choose this route call first because some officers will not cooperate and only make it worse if you call and discuss it first it will only scare her and not you too because you'll know what she is in for.

Hey G.,
Sorry to hear about your daughter. I live here in Escondido and I do know of a couple great counselers here. One is in Escondido and the other is in the RB area I believe. I do not know their numbers but they both go to my church so if you call my church they can give you their phone numbers!

Good luck!
B.
church number is: ###-###-####

What was going on in her life when it first started? Was there any type of Trauma. Examples are seperation, divorce, loss of a relative, pet,or best friend.

Kids usually do these things for attention. For example, if your recently seperated or divorced she may be crying out for his attention. In other words, she would rather see him come to pick her up out of concern than you.

There are several types of trauma from severe to mild.

You might try positive renforcement. For example, tell her that if she goes all week without getting into trouble, you will take her where she wants to go for lunch, or rent her favorite movie.

I hope that you find a good counselor. I get the feeling that she needs one. Something had happened, and you need to find out what it is. Goodluck with everything!

D.

Sorry about what you are going through. i don't know anyone to refer you to in the San Diego area. My only piece of advice is that you said this started about 4-5 weeks ago. Did anything change around her at this time? Maybe this is her way of reacting to it. I have a 7 year old myself and I notice when her behavior makes a 180, its b/c of some change that has happened in her life.
I wish you luck and hope you find way to help help her.

I am glad you are very concerned mother and are involved in your daughters life. You know that she did something wrong and are working on solutions to solve it. Some children have callous unemotional traits. Which means they do not know what they have done is wrong, they dont make that connection. They will continue doing it. It is not to get attention, they simply just do not know right from wrong. Yelling, scolding, etc. at them does not solve the problem, it makes it worse. Makes it worse b/c they simply do not understand why you are scolding them in the first place, they believe their behavior is normal. Reward system is a great place to start. Children with callous unemotional traits have benefited greatly from the reward system. If she doesnt take anything today, tell her you will take her to buy something special ($1 Stores work great for this)treat, toy, something for school, etc. As a parent you must follow through with what you set up. Also, children with these traits really find it special to spend time alone with their parent(s). Hope this helps!