Help! I'm Still Having Toilet Training Issues

I'd recommend that you give her back control of her learning process. As adults, we have mostly forgotten what it feels like to be worried or anxious about using the toilet, and we really can't exert control over our children in this situation. We can help them to feel comfortable and help them want to reach this developmental milestone. I'd back off a little, don't try to force anything, let her wear pull-ups or underwear, whichever SHE prefers, and clean up any accidents with patience and reassurance that soon she will learn.

Try to let go of your own worry about the fall and expect that there will be sleep/behavior/and perhaps toilet issues when you return to work, but you will STILL be able to help her with the transition, and she will be fine.

Honestly if she is holding it and thus causing the issue, then there is no excuse. Make her go and don't let her up until she goes. You can set up a reward system if you like and see if that helps.

But when my tried that, I didn't tolerate it. I rewarded mine when they did well and they got punished if they just got lazy and then had an accident. They all try to hold it when they are playing because they don't want to take the time to go. The first time I was patient and explained that is not acceptable. I explained that they could continue to play when they were done, but if they messed their pants again because they held it too long, then they would be punished.

One accident later and the punishment and that stopped. Neither of my older two have any problems in the potty outside of wiping good, but that's coordination not laziness or rebellion.

Put your foot down and she will stop. Besides I can't imagine her going to school and doing that. Kids are brutal and she will be teased. Not to mention that poor teacher. It's one thing to change your own child's pants or diapers, but not someone elses child (babies are different) Not fond of changing a big girl/boy's bottom myself.

My daughter is 5 and has the same issue. it is called encopresis. It is a condition that she can't control, but is treated with behavior therapy. talk to your pediatrician. We are currently seeing a therapist to help us with this, which is the recommended treatment.

S., How regular are her bowel movements? What have you done to help her get regular with her movements? Of course check with your nutritionist but our family medical advisers highly recommend a quality digestive enzyme daily. Pro-biotics may be needed as well on a regular basis. Maybe even a change in diet if necessary.

A scheduled "sitting on the pot" time is important as well until her body is regulated.

Sometimes it is easy to forget, but always remember who is in charge - Mommy or the toddler? I have to remind myself that often.

Stay Strong. This season will pass.

I'd suggest that you do NOT backpedal on the Pull-ups during the day, no matter what. Frustrating, I know - my daughter is almost five and most of the time will NOT communicate when she has to pee. (For some reason, she goes by herself to poop - weird, but I'm not complaining!) We have tried every method under the sun from stickers to timers, sought medical attention, and seen a behavioral therapist with little success. The only time there was remotely any improvement in her urinary accidents, was when we got rid of the diapers during the day entirely. It may be worth the extra loads of laundry for something to stick in the long run. Good luck.

My 4 year old sometimes still has this problem. You just have to watch close and when you see that look put her on the potty and make her sit till she goes. It is allot of crying and screaming to get off the pot, but in the end you will have results. Just be strong and don't give into the crying. My daughter has accidents only at home, When we go places she does just fine. Hope this helps. L.

Hi S.. When you return to work is your daughter going to school/daycare? Going to school helped my son, he would go to the bathroom because he saw the other kids. Also, I didn't force him to go the bathroom for the most part, but initially I tried have 3 times during the day that we would go to the bathroom (I wouldn't ask, I would just take him) and then he would pick the other times. Mine were: When he woke up in the morning, after lunch, and before bed. That seemed to help because it was routine. Cleaning underwear is the worst, but I would try to get rid of the pull-ups.

It's still not easy.... accidents happen. Good Luck!

Don't give her the option of getting off the toilet. Make her stay there until she goes. Of course this is only if she has been grimmascing. And always put her on the potty after she drinks and before you and she leaves the house.

don,t worry it will soon pass because she is four she will soon go on her own to the potty my son who is 10 year s old did that . right after his 4th birthday party he started going to the the pot. give it some time she know how to do it she just wan,t to on her own terms not yours god luck.