Food Allergies at Party

My daughter recently had her 9th Birthday party and had the same scenario with one of her closest friends. What I discovered is that children with allergies such as these and their parents have dealt with situations like this many times over, so when I addressed the issue with her mom, she just said "Oh yeah, I should've mentioned I always pack a birthday party snack for her".

She came with her own little insulated lunch bag that had an appropriate light lunch (while we had pizza) and a cupcake designed specifically for her intense allergies that she had with the children while we had cake.

My suggestion is to just address the issue with the parents and they probably have a game plan they use for parties already.

J.

I would just call up the mom and ask her if she wants to make them something special or if she knows where you can buy something for them.

HI L.,
Here is a URL http://www.ochef.com/218.htm that has cakes that you can make that all of the kids could eat and would love to eat. The chocolate cake looks especially good. Then all the kids could have the cake and no one feels left out. My son too has food allergies and he definitely feels left out when he can not have the things that other kids have. He says it is fine, but you can read it on his face. It is great that you are looking out for those little guys with allergies. AS a mom of a food allergy kid, it is tough. It is a good idea to talk to the parents, run the list of ingredients by them and then let them feel comfortable with their children eating the same cake as all of the rest of the kids. The allergy kids will love it and your daughter will too. I love to surround the cake with Oreos as well. Best of Luck and happy birthday to your little one.

If the Parent does not provide a snack, then I would say JELLO. Most kids (of all ages) love it. There is nothing in that MOST are allerigc to, and you can even make it fun for them, by cutting them into "Birthday shapes."

I worked in a daycare center a Loooong while ago, and what I did was make the "jiggler" jello, and then cut them into party shapes. (hats, cake, presents, kids etc) and then gave them a plastic mat, letting them make their own "party scene"..all the kids loved it and the parents were so pleased.

I don't know if for a party I would go that far, as the kids that get to eat the cake might get upset...but Jello would be the way I would go.

Soy ice cream would be a good option... check the ingredients though for egg and nut... vanilla is always a good choice... They may have an ice cream cake that would work for you too!

I have a few friends who have kids with allergies. They bring a "safe" dessert for their child when an allergy food is going to be served. Yes, I agree that your daughter should have a cake. I would suggest talking with the parents of the 2 children and ask for suggestions or ask what they serve in place of cake and/or icecream. The children with allergies will be facing this type of situation in school and other places so hopefully their parents are learning to be creative.
Good luck.

I just had a party for my 4 year old and there were two children with food allergies. The children with food allergies brought their own snacks and a special treat (cupcake, cookies, etc) that they could eat while the other children were eating pizza and cake. You may want to talk with their parents just to be sure.

I also know parents who have children with allergies. They always send their children to the parties with their special treats. However, they usually talk to the host of the party ahead of time to let them know about their childrens allergies. If you hand out goody bags with candy, you might also keep certain food allergies in mind.

Have a fun day.

You can serve homemade cake and ice cream, if you make the ice cream with soy milk. There is also a company called Cherrybrook which has allergen free cake mixes at the Jewel.

Most allergy aware parents are happy to bring a dessert for their own child to the party, as well. their kids are used to it, and are glad to have the "safe" food there. Ask the parents. There are also allergen free cookies, by Enjoy Life, that most jewels have now. You could offer some of those to the kids. I would call the parents and ask what they would prefer. There is no reason your child should go without a cake or ice cream, but just be aware and make provisions or make sure the other parents make some, for the allergic kids. Most of us are just thrilled that someone took the time to think of it.

My daughter has food allergies and we would always take a treat with us for her. Also Oreos are vegan, so there should be no milk or eggs. Check to see if they are processed in a plant that also processes nuts though. We always made a fresh fruit salad also for the children.
Cheryl

my son has nut allergies and my daughter is allergic to dairy, so we have to be really carefull. i take food with to parties and most parents and places are understanding. i also stay because his allergy is so severe that if he has a reaction he needs immediate medical attention and most liklely wont be able to say so. just ask those parents what they are comfortable with doing, and be open to it.

My niece is allegic to dairy and nuts but not the eggs so I understand how stressful it can be when having a meal that inlcudes her. You have received some great advice here that would make the moms and children happy. Call the parents....they will appreciate your concern and will workwith you to make your daughter and their child happy.

One dessert I always have on hand for my niece is OREOS! I know they do not have nuts or dairy but I am not sure about the egg. I would look at their ingredient list and see. My niece loves them and it always works to give her these when we have our dessert.

good luck.

Hi L.,
Thank you so much for being aware that it might be hard for the kids with allergies. My son is one of them (and we had a birthday party this weekend and my son has milk and sugar allergies).

I would definately ask the parents - that is a HUGE gesture and will be appreciated by them.

There are soy icecreams and sorbet (not sherbert) that does not have milk in it.

There are so many alternatives. And the kids with allergies know what they can and can't have, so they will probably understand if there is something that they can't have.

Best of Luck!
B.

L.,
My niece has Ciliac disease, which means that she cannot eat/process wheat - so I sort of understand both sides of your coin. I think you have to find a solution that will NOT exclude the kids who have alergies, or they will feel just awful. How about cupcakes that the kids could decorate with fruit and sprinkles? I think there may be more choices out there for the allergies you are dealing with and would think you could find a boxed cake/cupcakes that you could make, at least for those two kids. Try looking on line for some ideas or if you have a Whole Foods near you peruse the store. Sherbert instead of ice cream might be an option as well - and what kid doesn't like rainbow sherbert. Or maybe popsicles, they probably don't have milk or eggs?
On behalf of my niece, I thank you for inviting those kids with allergies and admire your thoughtfulnes in trying to accomodate them. ~Good luck, K.

I would ask the parents how serious the allergies are. Obviously you don't want to serve the foods if just touching them could cause a serious reaction. But if the kids just can't eat them, you might be able to offer alternative sweets (asking the parents what those child's favorites are) to those children. In addition, I know you can ask bakeries to prepare cakes without those ingredients, and I've heard that they're not bad. If you feel too bad about it, you could also provide a regular cake for your child at a different time when it wouldn't cause harm to anyone. Good luck. You are thoughtful to consider the children's allergies.

I would simply ask their parents what their favorite desert is so you can have it there for them. That way they are not left out and feeling sad but chances are the children are semi-used to dealing with other people getting goodies and them not being able to enjoy them as well. The other solution would be to have the cake at the very last when the two children can have the option to go home instead of watching everyone else get sweets.

L.,

I taught for many years and faced this dilema in my classroom almost every year....It's possible to have substitute stuff for the two little ones with allergies...I would ask their parents to either bring something, or ask them for recipes....There are dairy/egg free cakes and cupcakes....I know that kids with nut allergies can't even be around anything with nuts, because of the dust....I would just ask their parents for pointers........

I'm sure you could have cake and ice cream for the rest of your guests....I even think you could probably do sorbet or sherbert for the two little ones with allergies...

Good luck...It's nice that you are thinking about the two with allergies...a lot of people wouldn't...
M.

L.,

My husband is allergic to milk and has been since he was a baby. I am sure that the 2 kids with the allergies wouldn't want the other kids to not be able to have cake and ice cream just because of them. One option would be to get vegan cupcakes for the other 2 kids so that they have something. I think that Whole Foods has them. If you would like to make them yourself, I am pasting a recipe below.

As an FYI the only margarine at our store that does not have dairy proteins is Fleischmann's Unsalted Margarine. A lot of Duncan Hines frostings are vegan already, you can read the ingredients labels and find one if you want, I find that easier that making my own. Keep the ingredient lists for the foods, including the margarine, so the parents can double-check. Oreos have just recently become vegan (Newman O's have always been vegan). Foods are made with different ingredients at different locations and the ingredients change regularly.

Feel free to email me if you want: ____@____.com

D.
1 cup soy milk
1 teaspoon apple cider vinegar
3/4 cup granulated sugar
1/3 cup canola oil
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/2 teaspoon almond extract, chocolate extract, or more vanilla extract
1 cup all-purpose flour
1/3 cup cocoa powder, Dutch-processed or regular
3/4 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon baking powder
1/4 teaspoon salt

Preheat oven to 350°F and line a muffin pan with paper or foil liners.
Whisk together the soy milk and vinegar in a large bowl, and set aside for a few minutes to curdle. Add the sugar, oil, vanilla extract, and other extract, if using, to the soy milk mixture and beat until foamy. In a separate bowl, sift together the flour, cocoa powder, baking soda, baking powder, and salt. Add in two batches to wet ingredients and beat until no large lumps remain (a few tiny lumps are OK).
Pour into liners, filling three-quarters of the way. Bake 18 to 20 minutes, until a toothpick inserted into the center comes out clean. Transfer to a cooling rack and let cool completely.

If you actually do take the allergies of the children into consideration while planning the party, the party will probably go a bit more smoothly and the parents will LOVE you for it.
I say this from the perspective of being a mom of a daughter with food allergies. Yes, I do bring something special for my daughter to parties or let her know well in advance what she can eat and not eat (she is almost 7 and knows to ask if she's not sure and doesn't get as upset about it anymore.)

If you're seriously looking for alternatives, try Whole Foods.
http://www.wholefoods.com/
Call their bakery and ask if they can specially make a cake with those ingredients eliminated- it should not be hard for them to do. They are an organic/natural foods grocery chain and use very tasty ingredients in their baked goods. For example, they can use rice milk in place of dairy, egg substitutes if needed, etc. Other bakeries in the area may be able to help you as well, but I would search reviews before "trusting" them to make an allergen-free cake. (There is another grocery called Wild Oats that also may be able to help, similar to Whole Foods. http://www.wildoats.com/u/home/)
Another option is to buy special cookies or cupcakes for the party and save the "big special cake" for after family dinner, etc. when those children won't be around.
Trader Joes stores don't have bakeries to my knowledge, but you might find some cookies that meet your needs: http://www.traderjoes.com/
Vitamin store chains often carry products that meet allergy specifications as well. Try Fruitful Yield: http://www.fruitfulyield.com/

I know it's a pain if you choose to go this route, but it will be fun for EVERYONE when it comes time for cake and ice-cream this way.

Thank you for even sounding like you care- my daughter has food-dye allergies and even though all the parents of her classmates knew, she came home with nothing at all she could eat for Valentine's Day, etc. and could not participate in any of the birthday parties this year. She understands, but it still affects her that people really don't care and will put it "in front of her nose" and act like it's not a big deal, when really it's awful to feel left out at that age. So a big big THANK YOU for understanding and trying to accomodate these kids!!

If you need any other help, please feel free to message me.
-Amanda