My dd is 3. I moved into this area when she was still an infant, and I still don't know many people. Between work and school, I don't have much time to go out and do many social activities. What makes it more difficult is that my family has one vehicle to split between three adults (My SIL lives with us, so she can go to school here too.) so even when I DO have time to go out, I don't have transportation. I do have a bike with a child seat, but where I live there are no sidewalks and narrow roads... So I can't even safely walk or ride with her anywhere. I have thought about putting her into day care, just so she can have some interaction with kids her age, but I can't justify the cost when my SIL is available to watch her for free. Money is very tight, so even most of the mother's day out programs are not possible. I really wanted to join my library's summer reading club, but her age group just happens to meet during my class hours. And doesn't it just figure that the only kid close to her age in my neighborhood has parents who want nothing to do with their neighbors?
The only time she is around kids is when we go to the park, and there happens to be someone willing to play with her.
She does very well at home playing on her own, and I do make a point of spending time every day playing with her. I'm just worried that she will start preschool or kindergarten (if I don't decide to homeschool her... Which I am seriously considering... Lol) without any idea of how to act around other kids.
I'm not sure how much I should stress over this. I'm to the point that I'm ready to post on Craigslist looking for a play dates, lol. (Just joking...)
I have looked into doing day camps, mother groups, etc. but either don't have the money or transportation. My SIL can't drive, and hubby works nights and sleeps days, so neither of them are able to take her to anything either.
I have her on the waiting list to join Head Start, but the program here has been slashed so it's not likely that she will be accepted.
I'm not really sure what else I can do. How important is it at this age for her to be around kids her age? Any ideas for something else to try?
She's 3. 3 year olds really don't have BFFs at this point. They have playmates. And those playmates aren't always be the same.
It's okay. She'll make friends as she grows.
If you check Meetup.com you might be able to find mommy-kid play groups for working mothers. They tend to meet on weekends or after work hours.
Good luck!
3 is young. I'd say as long as you, her dad and your SIL are spending time with her and interacting, she's fine. You're the most important people in her life and the only ones she really wants to play with anyways. As for opportunities to include her with other kids, I'd continue going to your local parks. There's always someone there and if you strike up a conversation with the other moms at the park, the next thing you know, your kids will be playing together. Another idea is the take advantage of the nursery at your church, if you attend one. Every Sunday, I'd go to church and my kids would spend an hour in the nursery down the hall from where I was. There were lots of kids to interact with, responsible adults that I knew and felt comfortable with and it was free. Good luck. :)
Most kids don't have best friends at age 3. Most kids, the kids they are "friends with" at that age, are just kids of other moms that the moms enjoy hanging out, and so the kids do too, by default.
Don't sweat it. Continue to take her to the park. She will learn that other kids her age (and older and younger) are not little aliens and are just other people just like her. For now, play with her at home, but don't feel like it is ALL you need to do. In some regards, spending a lot of time around adults can be even better for little ones, because hopefully the adults they are around behave better than fellow 3 year olds! Kids mimic what they see. She is approaching the age (in the 4's) where she will benefit from learning to negotiate with peers. She can learn negotiation skills with adults, too, but the parameters are a little different with peers than with adults who are in authority over her.
She will be fine. Maybe a little more mature than he peers when she begins school, but that isn't a bad thing necessarily.
In our mothers group, we picked up mom and child and carpooled them to events, not all but some. you could join the moms group and request a playgroup to meet at your home as they come to you and just get to know moms first prior to asking for help. but that is what they are for to help. I would talk to the leader. Same with a church group or bible study, there are people willing to help if you speak up.
But 3 is still little and although it is good to socialize them as you can, preschool will be so much more fun for her when she starts cuz she has not had the kids to play with..........I think it will be just fine.
Not only would she benefit from the interaction, but three-year-olds can be hard to chase around! I do remember how it felt to have a three-year-old and not know many people for my DD to play with. By all means, make going to the park part of the day's routine, maybe even twice a day. Try different times of the day to see whether different people go at different times. When she gets to kindergarten, there will be plenty of kids to meet.
I would go speak with the librarian about the toddler reading time. Tell her about your wish to bring DD but that the time conflicts with your schedule. Maybe she notices another time during the week that a smaller, impromptu session can be arranged.
We have a program called Kindermusik in our area. It was once a week. I can't remember its cost, but perhaps a once-a-week program could be justified for the expense.
Some schools (wherever you are attending) have child care programs. See what the options are there. Talk with your classmates and see if playdates can evolve from those relationships.
You seem like a go-getter. If you meet kids at the church, maybe you can start a mom-child group at your house, at the park, at the library, or maybe the church would open up the room for you. Find out who is on the waiting list for Head Start and invite them.
Best wishes.
I think you need not worry...many of us are trapped in similar situations but just remember that having family members around is one of the best things that kids can enjoy at this time: it will be nice if you keep updating your own collections of rhymes and stories. there are websites that share activities that can be done with children. UK based site http://www.bookstart.org.uk/ is one such site for mama-baby activities.
3 is not an age where she is looking to have friends...
I joined a mommy's group, which was awesome because we all had kids the same age, so the mommy's could get together and the kids could play.
Are you a member of a church? Perhaps they have some sort of group you could look in to.
Go to meetup.com and look for mom's groups. I am in a few in my area. They vary a lot, but I am in one that has an event every month or so, and one that has multiple events each day. Even if you can only go to an event once in a while, that might help you - and your daughter - meet some people.
See if they have a MOMS club near you (moms offering moms support). You can find info online and a group that may be in your area... My MOMS club would help with transportation to events and playgroups. There is a small yearly fee ($10-15), but this can be waived. My MOMSclub plans a lot of "free" events, it has been a great resource!!!
Is there anyone with children you know? Can you make some friends and contacts at the playground. Since you can't go anywhere, could you have playdates at your home? Either you could have one while you're at home, or with your sister...ONLY if she truly doesn't mind.
None of my kids has friends of their own at that age. Sure with my younger two I had friends who had kids their age that they played with but those never developed into long term friends. Pretty much long term friends happened in kindergarten.
My adult children are still friends with some of their kindergarten friends, not the preschool ones.
So don't sweat it! Just do your best to get her around other kids and she will be fine.
My kids didn't make any real friends until they were 4 and in preschool. Seeing the same kids on a regular basis let them build relationships.
For now, you're her Bestie, and that is okay. :-)
Are you religious? A church might offer some time of meet up with other parents.
If you can't swing something though, please don't worry about it. I would definitely consider putting her in school for the socialization but if you can't do it until Kindergarten. Don't worry, I'm positive your daughter will adapt.
