Elmo Addict???

Updated on September 13, 2008
J.C. asks from Hebron, CT
13 answers

Is anyone elses child an Elmo nut?? It has come to the point where i am very concerned about my 13 month old. He refuses to do anything unless he sees Elmo. The worst is in the car and at meal times. In the car, we have to sing Elmo's World as loud as we can just so he won't scream the entire ride. He has a tantrum to the point of tears and screaming, and i've tried everything to entertain him. At meal times, he REFUSES to eat more than 3 bites without Elmo on. As soon as he sees that we touched the DVD player, he will eat without a peep. Every meal i try to feed him without Elmo with no success. He will occupy himself on the floor or in his walker for a 1/2 hr. tops before he starts wining and trying to get everyone's attention. I hate to be plopping him in front of the TV when he could be doing something so much more active. He's been watching Elmo ALL THE TIME ( to the point where I know every word ) since he got an Elmo's World DVD from Gramma when he was about 5 months old. Is this normal to this extreme? Any tips? Thanks.

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So What Happened?

So this whole Elmo thing wasn't as bad as it seemed. We watch him maaaybe once a day, if he can sit through lunch at the table without fussing, which usually isn't a problem. I'd like to thank everyone that gave me helpful AND positive feedback. To those who didn't, i suppose you're entitled to your opinions, but yes, quite a few of you WERE HARSH. Thanks anyway, and thanks again to those that helped.

(by the way, i wouldn't compare Elmo to a slasher movie....odd.)

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L.W.

answers from Boston on

Buy him an Elmo doll, get one that talks. That way it can go in the car too. And remember you are the parent, tell him 'no'. It may take a bit of time & patience, but if you are doing what he wants now, you're in real trouble later! :)LOL Good luck!

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J.P.

answers from Portland on

He's sounds like he's finding comfort in Elmo instead of soothing himself, or allowing other influences in (he most likely can't think of anything as fun and exciting as Elmo). He can have all the tantrums he wants to have as its a normal age-appropriate reaction, but he's learning that if he screams loud enough, doesn't eat etc. he'll get his Elmo. If this power play is allowed to continue, it won't be just Elmo it will be lots of other things he wants and demands...if he's loud enough or doesn't eat, he'll learn he'll get to have it. I would start with "Elmo times" and enjoy it at certain times of the day that he can expect and look forward to (like after a nap). Then that's it...time to do other things like go outside, look at book, sing other songs (I'm sure he repertoire is quite small at that age and the Elmo song is one he's familiar to, so he wants that). If he gets used to other activities, songs etc. he may start to request those as well. Elmo is hypnotic and very brightly colored and animated...its no wonder he likes him. BUT pretty soon it won't be just Elmo...he'll discover something else just as exciting, so setting up groundrules now is the best bet. Enjoy Elmo in small doses, endure some pretty nasty tantrums for a while (it will be bad, but don't give in!!), and slowly he'll be more able to take in other influences and entertainment (perhaps learn to entertain himself). As for eating, he won't starve. When he's hungry, he'll eat...Elmo is only a distraction (put a cool little toy on his tray instead). As for car rides, turn up the radio and ignore the screams...he'll stop if he learns screaming gets him nowhere (right now he knows it does). You and your husband don't have to sing the Elmo song unless you want to. Then its radio time, LOL!! Good luck!!

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J.E.

answers from Boston on

J.,

Ha-ha, we have soooo been there!!! Our now 20 month old is obsessed with Barney but it was EVERYTHING ELMO for a looong time. We have DVD's, stuffed animals, you name it, we have Elmo. Now we can limit the Barney stuff because it's not sold much in stores ha-ha. :) This is a phase and you'll see as your son gets older that Elmo isn't the "it" thing anymore but he will change over to something else. I don't see it as concerning, they just relate best to different characters and hey who doesn't love ELMO... I still get a kick out of watching Sesame Street. :) Our 5 1/2 year old was the same way and she grew out of it and move onto different characters and likes as she has started to "grow up." They need Elmo's Annonymous for our little ones!!! :) This will pass, just hang tight and also if you haven't already, try introducing him to something different or new, my daughter enjoys blues clues and of course Barney, Wonder Pets, Dora, etc. Good luck.

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E.M.

answers from Boston on

THANK YOU!!!!!!!!
I giggled so much when I read this, you are so funny!
Enjoy this stage and be glad it's not Barney or John McCain.
When we got overloaded from our kids obsessions we knew it was time for the babysitter and an evening out. Sometimes taking a break from it yourself can help you see the humor in it again.
**When my littlest guy got became obsessed with Superman, he wore the costume everyday for 2 1/2 YEARS!!! We have 2 years of school pictures with him as Superman, family portraits with him as Superman, and a box of his Superman costumes (he did grow during that time and we had to keep getting new costumes,(we used to refer to them as his "uniform"). Then one random day in Kindergarten he dressed himself in grey pants and a "Yoda" (from star wars) T-shirt, no big drama, no announcement, Superman was all done. We were flabbergasted!!!! It took the rest of our family a few weeks to make the adjustment, but he was all set, Superman had run it's course. To tell you the truth, when I look back on it, it makes me smile and sometimes I miss Superman.

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C.H.

answers from Providence on

hi J., no this is not okay. however, is it a product of habit that you have given into bcuz of the screaming etc.... so therefore you give in? Or does you instinct/ intuition tell you there is more going on?? have you discussed this w/ his pedi?
I would begin by getting rid of the elmo things! hide them bring them to someone elses house or throw them. Put them somewhere where you can not have access to them when your son begins his screaming. It takes three days at this age to break a habit. SOOO, refuse to give in YOU ARE THE PARENT. He does not make the rules. YES he will scream, tantrum etc. maybe all day the 1st day, however, do not give in this will make it worse. Be consistent for three consectuctive days. He will not starve when he is humgry enough he will eat. On the third day you should see a decrease in this behavior. In the mean time while elmo is out of the picture provide new fun toys, A variety of them as well as new music for the car, to introduce him to and get him used to. I realize this will not bew easy and you we feel awful and want to give in BUT DO NOT! If at the end of three days you do not see any improvement of decrease in his screaming or behaviors then I would ask the pedi for some advice. A little about me. I am a mom of a 5 year old boy and I am a psychologist who has been working with birth to 7 year olds for the past seven years. Behaviors are usually learned and can be unlearned unless there is an underlying concern. good luck and pleas feel free to ask me any questions or give me feed back YOU have the power you are the parent.

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C.R.

answers from Boston on

I just want to point out your mention that he can entertain himself for 30min at a time, that's wonderful! I have a 13month old- and I am finding that having other routines, besides just for sleeping and eating is helpful- such as she knows that immediately after each meal, she gets plopped into the play yard near me for 20 minutes or so while I do cleanup or quick chores. Other times, I just try to involve her in whatever I am doing- loading the washing machine, or picking up things, and let her feel like she is somehow adding to the effort (it does make everything take a lot longer.) It might be hard to have to deal with the tantrums now when keeping the TV off- he just expects it to be on all the time now- Elmo is like another member of the family to him! But it will help to keep him from growing into a kid, and then an adult, who needs to watch TV all the time- if you can nip it in the bud now.

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T.B.

answers from Boston on

As a mom of three boys close in age, they definately get fixated on something - Elmo, a stuffed animal and, in one case, a spoon (needed to carry it around for a few days in his pocket). As long as it's not distrubive to the household, then I think it's okay to go along with it - but when it starts to control the house, then you need to step in and set some limits. This is going to sound harsh, so I apologize, but it seems to me that your son has you trained pretty well. He is starting to learn that if he whines enough and has a tantrum, then he can get what he wants and it's just going to get worse from here. I agree with some of the other suggestions - especially, let him watch it at the same time everyday. As for eating, maybe you can get an elmo plate or cup that he can use to eat with instead of watching tv. Getting out of the house always helps - playground, classes at the Y, playdates...whatever, something to get his mind off of it. Breaking him of this behavior will be tough, but it'll be a lot easier now than when he is two or three!! Good Luck!!!

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A.G.

answers from Lewiston on

as far as E L M O at meal times try getting him a dishware set of elom to eat with and then shut off the dvd while he eats. do not CAVE in on having the tv on during meals. I have found my kids eat better when the tv is off. He will not starve himself, he will give in and eat. HUNGER always wins out eventually. as for in the car let him bring along a stuffed elmo. for longer trips bring along the dvd player. It will be a lifesaver. And yes limit his tv watching to an hour a day. Then you can indulge him in his Elmo and feel not guilt. It is best to establish good habits now while he will adapt to what you want quickly. There is nothing wrong with his love for ELMO. He jsut needs other ways to enjoy elmo besides watching him. Let him bring his stuffed elom to the swings.etc.(buy two). let him have other things taht have ELMO onthem like clotrhes and sneakers. Lets bring elmo for a walk.After you have dressed himinhis Elmo fleece and sneakers. Also if you know someone that can do ELMO"S voice have them talk to him lik elmo telling him all about the funthings he loves to do besides watch tv/dvds. I LOVE ELMO TOO!!

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S.D.

answers from Portland on

Oh the joys of motherhood..its always something, isn't it? My kids loved Elmo but def not to the extreme of your son. He's a tough age too bc you can't yet reason with him or bribe him.
My only suggestion is to get him an elmo doll or book that he can hold in the car or flip through while you feed him. Maybe that will help keep him off the TV.
Good Luck

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L.F.

answers from Barnstable on

Sounds like he has total control over you. Would you allow him to watch a slasher movie if he wanted to? This is not good for him at all. This is all about power and control. This is a major problem and will take some work. Stop this right now. Let him scream and refuse to eat the same way you would handle any temper tantrum. He will raise the stakes at first but believe me you can win. Hold out. His behavior is asking "how bad do I have to get before you do something about me?" All children needs limits and structure. He needs limits right now. OK, maybe I sound too harsh.

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K.G.

answers from Boston on

I know this will sound harsh and a little insenstive and easier said than done, but... TURN OFF THE TV. He's not turning it on, you are. You'll have to listen to him scream for a few days, maybe a week, but he'll get over it. He won't die of starvation either. When he gets hungry he'll eat. My daughter was so in to Disney princess that I couldn't stand it anymore. The straw that broke the camels back is when I said to her, when she was four, "Why don't you help me clean up anymore when I ask you to? You used to be so helpful." Her reply: "Princesses don't broom!" We are slowly weaning princess paraphernalia from our home!

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K.T.

answers from Boston on

As a mom of a 8yr old and 2yr old.......... Elmo is only the begining my dear!!! I have gone through obsessions w/ Elmo, Thomas the Train, Transformers and so on and so on. Let him have his Elmo with some limits, but better yet, get him interested in some other characters, Barney or Thomas to name a couple. You will be dealing with years of this!!!
Best of LUck

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L.S.

answers from New London on

Kids do get fascinated and fixated on one thing if you let them and sometimes by accident. Seems like this was truly accidental! Who knew he would find elmo so fascinating! But I think it is time to wean baby off of elmo. Instead of the tv show at dinner try giving him an elmo toy and at this age, they do understand more than you think they do. You can say Elmo (movie or toy) after dinner. "You can have elmo bib with dinner. first eat food then elmo." Then limit elmo to a few minutes per day less and less. See if you can find a different tape of elmo that is not very long. Introduce him to other sesame street characters. I don't know what it is about elmo, it is like he hypnotizes kids! Tantrums are okay, just don't give in to them. I wish you the best, but it looks like you might have to start weaning baby from the addiction. He will continue to throw tantrums if he thinks it will get him what he wants. It will be hard but I know you can do it and he will be better for it.

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