Children and Death of Parent...

We had this happen in my daughter's second grade class last year. This girl's mom died unexpectedly and I don't think from natural causes. It was very very sad.

I think it would be best if you acknowledged it with her privately, " I'm so sorry to hear about your Dad. " offered support... "if you need anything please don't be afraid to ask." And then do try to maintain normalcy while also watching carefully to support her when she doesn't say anything but you can tell she needs it.

The little girl in my daughter's class struggled all year. She would seem ok on some days, but mostly, she looked fatigued, stressed, sad. When I saw her like that, I would tell her she seemed like she needed a hug and I had some extra and I'd ask her if that was ok.

Be sensitive to things that might be upsetting, like holidays, her birthday, Father's day etc...

If your daughter and she are friends, set up some play dates...

Good luck~ it's such a hard thing for anyone to go through. especially a child.:(

This is partially a cut-and-paste of another answer I gave regarding death. Hope it helps.

Death is a part of life. It's a sad part that we have to talk to our kids about candidly. I think it's important that you talk to her A. and gauge what's going on and how she's doing. Will her she be staying for the meeting? I think that might be a good idea. Can you call the other parents and ask that they prepare their girls? Let them know that it probably isn't a good idea to ask her about it.

As for discussing? I really wouldn't, except maybe to give a hug and say "I'm very sorry to hear about your daddy."

Don't use euphemisms. Children don't understand "going to heaven" or "going to a better place." They'll wonder why that person can't come back. Heaven is a tough concept for a child. Saying that someone is going to heaven is like saying they're going to Hawaii. They're going to eventually want to know when that person will come home like everyone does after a vacation.

If a child asks, do talk honestly but gently about death. All living things die eventually. Most die of old age, some die because they are sick, and very few die because of accidents. It's okay to be sad and cry and need lots of hugs, because we will miss our loved ones.

Blessings!

♥
C. Lee

Oh my goodness the poor thing. It's great that you will let the other parents know ahead of time. I am sure she's going cause she wants some normalness right now in her life. She may not want to be alone. I would pull her aside and let her know that you are there for her.

Good luck and God Bless!!!

No, I have not, but I am the mom of a 3rd grade Brownie.

I guess I would pull her aside and tell her I am sorry. Let her know if she needs a break or a time out to give you a signal. Otherwise, I would run the meeting as normal. She will probably benefit from a "break" to distract her from what is happening at home. What does her mother say? Is someone staying with her at the meeting in case she has a problem?

I actually am a bit more worried that the other girls aren't prepared. Do they know? What if she says something, will they get upset? Ideally, I would suggest you meet with the Moms of the troop members to discuss, and then talk to the girls about how to act. "Amy's Mom says Amy is sad and doesnt' want to talk about her Dad. So I will tell her how sorry we all are and then we will go on with the meeting. You can talk to her privately at another time." I would just hate to see the meeting turn into a discussion about her father's death. That is something her parent should be involved in. That said, you can't ignore it, as that is just as disrespectful.

Your in a tough spot. Good luck. Maybe ask her in private what she wants to talk about? Or if she would rather not talk about her Dad yet? Yikes. What does Mom say?