We have been invited to a birthday party for a 4 year old but they are requesting no gifts. I want to respect their wishes but I feel bad not doing something. I'd like some feedback on what others have done when faced with this situation. Is it okay to bring a card or to make something for him? Any ideas or suggestions would be appreciated. Thank you in advance!
Why not contact the parents and ask if you can contribute to the party somehow - bringing drinks, snacks, paper goods, favors, etc?
You could donate money to a children's charity in honor of the birthday boy and give him a card.
I say if the parents requested no-gift then you should respect their wishes. They probably have a very good reason behind their request, and bringing a gift could defeat the purpose. so that being said if you really want to do something make a donation to a kid oriented org like the zoo, cooks ect. that way it is the best of both worlds and who can object to a charitable doantion. good luck!
I am doing a "no gifts" party for my little girl's birthday next week. She will be 3. I put on the invitations that if they still wanted to honor her, they could donate to a children's charity in her name. We've done that for other children and usually the charity will send the family a notice saying they received the donation.
I like Erikkas suggestion but maybe you should just ask the parents yourself and tell them what you just said in your request. However, the child is obviously getting everything he needs and wants for his birthday for them to request no presents. I've never heard of such a thing for such a young child.
Anyhow, if they say no gifts, I would just respect their wishes and I'm sure the little boy will be having so much fun at his party to notice you didn't bring anything.
Take Care!
Don't feel bad. Feel bad if you show up with a present and no one else does, and then THEY all end up feeling like tools because of you!
I always tell people that they don't have to bring anything when they RSVP, but people do anyways and I have waaaaaaay too many toys that aren't even unwrapped in my home.
I agree with the other posters on their suggestions since you feel obligated to do something. (But why do you feel this guilt? Offering them your respect of their request should not give you any bad feelings, imho.) I recently had this discussion with some friends and the conculsion basically was that if you do bring a gift, you are disrespecting the parents and also may be negatively influencing the child who has beeen told they will not be receiving any gifts that he/she is going to get stuff anyway. One of the girls in our discussion took those things her child got and donated them.
I am doing this for my 2 year old daughter...reason being is b/c at such a young age I don't want to obligate friends to buy gifts especially b/c it is usually friends from school, daycare, etc and not really close family friends. Plus I don't feel that my child needs 9-10 extra toys. I'm not being rude but sometimes you just get stuff you don't want or like or wouldnt' really allow your child to have. Plus I personally don't want my daughter always expecting so much at her birthday. I want to teach her about giving and charity and I think birthdays are a good time to do that. She will get plenty of presents from family plus her party celebration. The only thing different we are doing for my daughter is we asked for each toddler to bring a gently used book and we are donating it to Half Pint Library. I honestly do not feel you should bring a gift - a donation somewhere with the info in a card might be ok. I actually would consider that very thoughtful and a nice gesture. You could write in the card, "in honor of your birthday a $10 donation has been made to ...." or you could even donate books or gently used stuffed animals. Fire stations usually take stuffed animals b/c they keep them on hand when they have to take care of small children who are frightened. Anyway...just enjoy the party and you shouldn't feel guilty.
