I've noticed that my 4 year old has become addicted to the computer. Last summer he knew nothing of how to operate a computer or how to use a mouse. He is now an old pro at clicking and finding computer games. I would allow him about 10 to 15 minutes during the week. However, now when I tell him computer time is over he has a fit. I actually had to put a lock on the computer room door.
On saturday's when I'm off grocery shopping and doing errands my husband will allow him to be on the computer for hours because he can have his free time. this has made the situation worse.
I suppose it has it's good ponts because my son has learned some words and does now what to click. His teacher stated to limit his computer time because he will get use to things always needed to be in action in order to pay attention. Most of his games are educational so I don't know if this is hurting him?
That's typical 4-5 yr old behavior not computer addiction.
My kids get 30min-1 hr of computer time at at time , not everyday cause there's just too much going on. Just make sure hubby follows the rules too and you'll start seeing better behavior from him, having you only giving him 10-15 mins and dad letting him do what he wants is causing the problem not the computer itself.
My boys love their computer time (3 and 7). My 3 yo of course only plays PBS kids and thomas games and needs my help for most of it, but their in lies the key. Just like with TV, you don't let your child watch all he/she wants with no regard to time spent and content and frequently you are all probably watching as a family.
We do computer time as a family (one parent with one kid) and ours is centrally located so I can cook dinner and I can interact with the kids while on the computer.
Looks like you are doing a great job monitoring content and time and just like anything when it is time to stop (even outside play time) you will get a rise out of the child.
RE: Hubby. either it is important enough to talk to him about it and get on the same page, or not. You could tell your son he has XX hours of computer time a week and if he wants to use it all on Saturday, nothing left for the week He may be able to make that choice himself, but at 4, probably not.
All that to say, stick to your guns and meet your hubby in the middle on the Saturday time. It does not sound excessive.
Good luck!
Your 4 yr old is less of a problem than your husband. It helps if you guys are on the same page regarding tv/computer time. You are going to be dealing with computer issues for years if you don't get some ground rules established now. If Dad can't be trusted not to use the computer as a baby sitter, perhaps you should buy a cord lock and take the key with you when you go shopping. Kids need to run, play, kick a ball around, ride a tricycle/bike, etc and all the time he's spending playing with a computer is time taken away from moving and exercising. Clicking a key board or mouse does not build small motor control of the hand muscles like coloring or cutting paper with scissors or lacing cards and they need that for writing in school.
Any kind of "screen time" for children this age should be limited. You need to get on the same page with your husband and agree to an appropriate period of time. 10-15 minutes on a computer at this age is plenty.
Having said that, it's fun to play computer games and he isn't going to want to turn it off. I would make sure that the computer is somehow password protected so that he cannot easily access the games. I would also suggest setting a timer so that he can monitor his own time. If you agree on 15 minutes, set the timer for 10 minutes and give him a verbal "five minute warning", "2 minute warning" and "time to shut it off". He's going to give you a hard time, but he will eventually recognize the "warning system" and know that he needs to wrap it up.
You and hubby need to be on the same page. First order of business. Then you can both enforce computer time.
Secondly if you and hubby are both involved in other fun activities, the fits should lessen.
I think computers have become babysitters, and when life gets boring for kids otherwise, they will find something like computers to captivate them.
But simple disciplinary behavior controls are needed too. Throwing a fit to get his way is not acceptable. Explain he needs to explore other areas of entertainment and fun too. A little structure will help him at school. Fits won't be tolerated there either.
Just make sure your sons day is well rounded with other activities. If all he ever wants to do is sit on the PC that will be a problem. Just make sure he still likes to play outside and draw and all the other stuff kids need to do. Having them sit too much is not good for their metabolism for one thing, and they will become anti social and hooked on instant gratification.
Just keep him well rounded and balance it out.
And by all means make sure Dad is on board with that as well.
I would have a fit on 15 mins too. U need more time give him a half hr. and if hes palying a game that involves math i woul let him do it for a hr. but no more than that. 15 mins is too short.
It's a good thing but not in large doses. If your hubby won't limit the time, you may need to take him with you or plan a play date for him. Too much isn't good for many reasons including the addictive nature of it, but you're right that it can teach him skills and, as your hubby has discovered, keep him busy! Childhood obesity due to inactivity is one of the things that's being looked at more these days. Kids need to be very active!
Letting your son have alone time on the computer is not a good idea. Pornography sites target kids, they set the name of the site to be slightly misspelled from the real children's site and boom the kid is exposed! Never ever let him on there alone.
That said, even if the games are not online and he has no access to the internet, that much screen time is not good for his developing brain, even if its "educational". He needs to be moving and playing and learning how to use his body! His teacher is spot on, don't make her job harder!!!
10-15 min a day is plenty! You might need to get a more interactive toy for dad to have him play with when you're shopping, or maybe you should take him to the store with you. I do all my shopping with my 3.5 year old and 13 month old in tow. Yes it takes a bit longer, but they're learning how to behave when I'm shopping. Basically if dad is letting him on the computer for hours while you're gone, this is a problem, and if he doesn't see it you need to take your son with you because the temptation to put him in front of the computer so he can do what he wants is too great. What's telling is that you've had to lock the door to the computer room. Obviously your son is SO interested in the computer that he's willing to sneak in and use it against the rules.
Best wishes!
My daughter is 8, and she began exploring the computer around age 5. She is a computer wiz now. With the way the word operates now, I think that computer skills at that age are actually a must. She has to take all her tests on a computer at school.
That said, they CAN get addicted. You simply have to monitor it. During the summer, she was allowed 2 hours a day. And an hour and a half had to be on a site that was educational...she could spend a half hour on something like youtube (with my close supervision, of course). There are some really good sites that helped her learn to read/count. Playhousedisney.com is very good, and if he's into Webkinz, they have a lot of learning games, too. Your husband needs to get on board or this won't work. I also have found the computer to help with disciplining...if she acts up, she loses computer privileges. That keeps her in line.
