To V. Smile or Not To

I have a 5yr old who loves video games. He has the leapster and we have a Wii. Plus he plays on the computer etc... Anyway, I think the games are good for the kids because they do learn, but moderation is the key. Anything can be good in moderation. By you being responsible and not letting him play them 24/7 it will help teach him to be responsible and be able to put the game away and do what is appropriate.

You know, I wouldn't--but that's just me : )
I have hard enough time keeping my children off the computer and outside playing when the weather is nice.
I personally feel that if we have a computer that's enough.
I say teach her to think for herself--critically--not just to choose a choice she's given by a computer.
I know you will make a good choice. Good for you that you're even worried about it. My past experience is, if you're having qualms, there's probably a reason : )

--H.

my son is 2 1/2 and he already has a Nintendo DS, a Leapster, and an old laptop to play computer games (all educational). Although he loves his games, he would much rather be outside playing all of the time. So long as you agree to limit the game playing to times that you would be inside anyway, it shouldn't pose a problem.

C.,

I have three kids, ages 8, 5, and 2, and not one gaming system in the house. The oldest boy knows they are around because all of his friends have them (Wiis, Nintendo, etc) and to him they seem "cool". What he doesn't see is that those boys are inside all day, sitting on their fannies, totally absorbed in video games, getting overweight and soft. My kids are outside as much as I can get them there and play wild, imaginative games. I would not trade that for any measure of quiet while they sit in front of the TV.

I recently priced a Wii system at Wal-Mart and was astounded to find it is $250! Each game is an additional $30 and at least 85% of them are about killing, war, sex, etc. Is that something I want my little ones doing? Training them to be imprisoned?

VSmiles seem innocent but they only lead to other things. Our daughter has a little friend who at four did nothing but play VSmile for hours on end. I finally quit letting DD go to the girl's house because that's all they did...even on glorious days. And then when she came home all I heard was, "I want, I want, I want."

My kids think I am mean and don't want them to have fun. I hope one day they can look back on their childhood and be grateful I prevented them from wasting their imaginative years in front of a TV killing someone.

K.

I don't have a problem with it...in moderation. Say 30 minutes to an hour. Set a timer and let her know that when the timer goes off, V-smile goes by by. I think today's problem is parents rely on electronics to babysit their kids. Then kids get caught up into the make believe and stay there and have trouble in real life. My kids get one hour of computer time Sun-Thursday and 2 hours on Fri and Sat. They have to share the computer, and they are each supposed to log in to their AOL account where the timers are set. My oldest always finds ways around it, and thinks he can play the computer as long as he wants since I never noticed. Speaking of which, anyone want a 13 yr old?

I myself have a gaming system... (Xbox360) some of my girlfriends and I use it to stay in touch and play games together since we are in 3 different states now... I think if you use it responsibly it shouldn't be an issue; we also have a Wii for our family as well. My daughter (4.5yrs) is given limited time on it (no more than a half hour-we use a timer too) and it is a reward as is her Vsmile, she loves the games that both systems have. We do make sure she has plenty of time both in and out of the house and we strive to keep her schedule well rounded. Hope that helps!

You can absolutely do both, have indoor games and stay active outside. Remember, you set the rules. Our kids have several game consoles and computer games but they also LOVE getting out to swing, jump on the trampoline, ride bikes, scooters, swim, etc., and would honestly rather do this most of the time. There are definitely times when the weather doesn't allow the outside stuff and hours of games beats starring at a tv to me. Our kids do great in school and the game playing has not interferred at all. I have a friend whose a dad and he helped my husband accept our son playing games more than we liked ... he said, "he's doing great in school, he's a great kids, you know where he is and what he's doing ... let him play the games. It's obviously not interferring with HIS school work." There are many kids that get bored and hang out with other bored kids and they sometimes get in trouble (not always!!). If they want to relax and play games, to us it's just another thing to do in their day that they enjoy. We let them but we also will say, "enough" if we see they should be doing something else. We definitely monitor the games context and don't allow any violent games (anything rated questionable on the packaging by age). There's a ton of others to choose from for both our son and daughter.

Hi C.,

I think that the V-Smile is great. Our son was about the same age as your daughter when we got one. In the begining he had problems learning to use it. But, we worked on it a couple times a week and in no time he was a pro. He would get so excieted when he had made it to a new level and could tell me what he had done. There are lots of games for each age level. We also worked outside of the V-Smile on letters, numbers, shapes, and sounds. So the V-Smile just helped to reinforce what he was learning. When he went to preschool he already knew the basic skills and was ready to read. Which also helped for Kindergarten. If you work with your girls outside of the V-Smile also you will find a balance with other activities. We also have the Lepster and we had the Lepad both help with reading skills. Our son is a big play outside kid so we had no problem with finding a balance.
I hope that this has helped you.

I bought my granddaughter one when she was almost four and she loves it. My son and daughter N Law limit her play time with it and it is not every day. She has learned alot with it. It is a great learning tool you just have to have certain times to play. Make it a time she will look forward to maybe a time for herself. Hope this has been some help.

I don't think that video games are completely bad. It's just the amount of time you let your kids play the games versus playing outside and other things. When I was growing up, we always got the latest Nintendo and games. I don't remember how much time we would spend playing them, but I do remember spending a lot of time playing outside as well. If you do get the V Smile, just make sure your daughter still plays outside & with other things. Limit her time with the V Smile and I'm sure she will do just fine.

I gave my girls Leappads when they were younger. now they are 8 & 9 and spend a small amount of time every month on the webkins website. We dont watch very much tv around here, and when we do, it's usually a nature or science show. They still get their Sat. morning cartoons so we can sleep in and the occasional Nickelodeon, but clamour every chance they get to go outside to play and read when they can't. We live off the floodplain so we have a wealth of nature in our backyard that we engage them in often. And my husband is the same as yours (I think its a man-thing, but it beats a sports fanatic, so I dont complain) - we had an old Nintendo I found in a thrift store and he was into the 20 year-old Zelda nonstop. He also has some games on his cell that I catch him playing. As long as you're firm on your limits and explain the why's - and be sure to share the experiences with them, you shouldn't have a problem with treating your kids to the occasional electronic.

I think you are on the right track. Have you noticed that for a while you couldn't find any basic/non-electronic or computerized toys and now they are popping back up? I think we are beginning to realize that while these computerized/electronic toys are fun and all the rage, we still really do need the basics in life! Even as adults...when is the last time any of us read a newspaper instead of getting our news from the computer...

My husband and I are determined to make sure our child has a mix of toys, but mostly we want him to have basic toys so that WE can play with him. Of course, I have nothing against the internet, it does things like this wonderful message board where we can all talk about these things. It's just that we as a society depend all too often on "things" to teach or kids when WE should be doing that, and maybe every now and then introducing other things.

If it were me, I would buy the V Smile but only let her play with it once or twice a week. That way, it is a specail treat and she won't be so inclined to only play video games as opposed to playing outside in the dirt or on a bike, etc.

Just my opinion.

My son got the V Smile Pocket for Christmas last year. He was 3 1/2. He loves it. I only let him play about a half hour at a time one to three times a week. It comes in handy for long car trips. He still plays outside a lot, and when inside plays with his trains or does art work. We also got a regular V smile as a hand me down and he likes playing that one with my husband.

Hi C.,
I have one thing for you to consider-I'd let her try out one at a friend/relative's house first.
We got a V-Smile Baby for our girl (1st Christmas present from Granny and Grampy) and now at 2yrs 7mos she barely plays with it-calls the part you put in your lap "yap top" :-). She does like the lap portion (I know older models have different things-joysticks etc...) b/c it has shapes and you can learn about that independently from the tv portion.
She would rather "run, run, RUN" outside than to sit in front of a game-I'm pondering whether to get an older game for her for Christmas (she will be 3 next March)-and am torn b/c she's a bit of a tomboy already and I wonder if i'd be wasting my $$.
One thing I'm pondering is a Leapfrog Cycle (Maybe next Christmas) thingy...they get exercise while learning... I'm not saying your child would do better-I think MINE would, offering options :-).
Also, Leapfrog has hand held game systems she can play different games and you can always limit her time on the system you choose.
I hope this doesn't add to the confusion :-).
Good Luck (I always wonder about stuff like this-it's hard not to think of future effects).
C.

I say no. Read Marie Winn's The Plug-in Drug for details. It turned me off from tv, big-time. Shealso discusses games in her updated edition. Scary study results from all over.

L.

If you are concerned about her being an "indoor" child, limit her amout of play time on the game. Let her choose one game each day that she can play for 30 min. or 1 hour and then turn it off. You could also pair that toy with others that promote learning with no TV involved. Discovery Toys offer a great line of educational toys that are all "kid powered". Check them out at www.toycubby.com.
J.

Hi C.,

I don't see much wrong with buying any kind of game system for your child so long as she is taught that along with 'rights' to use it there are responsibilities. Putting a few simple rules in place should teach her this. X time for playing etc, X time for being with family, playing outside, participating in household tasks (having regard to her very young age of course). It would be better if you and your husband were to agree to a reasonable list of rules, without being too rigid, and support each other in applying them. I don't really go along with getting the children to decide what the rules should be although I know that seems to have been the vogue for quite a few years now. The parents are the ones in charge, and their greatest charge is raising happy, healthy and responsible children. Children need boundaries to feel secure. Good luck.I hope it all turns out well.
Kind regards,
S.

Hi there. I purchased the V-Smile for my son for his 4th bday (he is almost 6) and he has loved it. It has reinforced the teaching that we have been doing on his letters and numbers, shapes and colors, etc. He is also a big time outside guy, so it really does balance with us. He doesn't always want to be inside, actually he would prefer to be outside at all times. He really enjoys the games and I think that even though they are 'educational' they don't really realize it because it has their favorite characters. I hope this helps!

My mom did something that I respected, and actually appreciated, even as a child. It was before the age of educational video games, but I think it allows time for the educational games without creating a game junkie. Anyway, she got some poker chips and picked a color for each of us. We got a certain number of chips at the beginning of each week - I think it was five, but I don't remember. Each chip was worth a certain amount of time on the game. If we were in the middle of a game when our chip ran out, we could pay another one, or we could quit. She had a basket beside the game console that held the chips, and we had to make sure that we let her know as we spent them so she could set a timer or monitor our time. My sister would speed through hers in a day, but my brother and I would conserve ours. (It also was an early lesson in budgeting!) We all still grew up loving to play and read as well - we were able to be well-rounded in our activity because Mom set limits. I think that is the key - setting hard and fast time limits. Hope that helps!

Everything in moderation, give a time limit and stick to it. I've never had a problem with my kids and playing games (we have a v-smile and a Wii that they can play on), but they know they have a time limit and have to take turns. My hubby on the other hand can play x-box for days...

I have a 5 year old grand daughter living with me. I gave her a V.Smile late Christmas. It is great. She is learning eye/hand coordination as well as colors, shapes, counting, etc. In todays techno world, the computer skills are a must have and this is a fun way to introduce them. She is still very much interested in riding her bike, playing on the swing set, or in the sand box. I find that supervision of her time and placing limits on TV time has worked well for us.
M.

V-Smile is a great learning game and I do let my children play games (even the Playstation!) and watch T.V. I do set time limits though, it's obviously not good for anyone (and we adults get just as addicted to them!) to sit and play video games all day long! My children LOVE to also play outside and play board games and with their basic toys like cars/trains and such! And they LOVE to read...my 6 yr. old now reads to us and his little brother! I do agree with the concept that you are the parent and you have the control to say when and how long they're allowed to play! They even play educational computer games in school...it's just limited!:) Your husband and you do need to agree on the rules and let your child know the rules from the beginning...and stick to them! When my son gets in trouble that's the first privilege to be taken away!! We got the V-Smile pocket last year and they love it...even my 3 yr. old can play on it. It's great on road trips as well! We also have a reg. V-Smile and the first one we got was when they first came out and it broke too, but our newer one works great! Good Luck with your decision!!:):)

I don't know if you are interested but If you do decide to get one. I just saw one at Once Upon a Child which is a consignment store on Western and I'm not sure which cross street I think it is 27th in Moore but I am not sure what it is in OKC. It is the Palagio Shopping center. Anyway they had a V smile and what looked like a ton of games in a bag back by the toy wall. It was up on a really high shelf and it was only 50 dollars. I know my 4 yr olds would never notice if it was brand new or not. Just thought I would mention it. I didn't really look at it but they usually don't take things that aren't in good shape.

Well I have a 3 1/2 year old son. I limit his indoor activities (weather cooperating). With the video game you could start off with 30 minutes like when you are cooking dinner. My son gets an hour of cartoons, 30 when we get home and an episode of diego, dora, clifford etc. after bath and storytime. When the episode is over I go back in his room and turn the tv off and the light and the nightlight comes on. He recognizes it as part of his nightime routine and it really helps him be ready to fall asleep. When the weather is bad then I might extend to 2 episodes when we get home so he gets an hour and a half. I try to help him choose creative play ideas and he loves to color and paint. But I also use his reward as something that can go to timeout for bad behaviour. And if he is on the red apple at school (for bad behaviour) we come home to timeout and he has to miss his afterschool blues clues 30 minutes. This is a new idea I am trying with bringing him home to time out if at school he did not do good and it seems to keep him pretty motivated and in the morning he walks in and tells his teacher "I am going to stay on the green apple today!"

I gave both of my children v smiles when they were four. I only allow them to play them on the weekend not during the week while school and soccer is going on. I also only let them play for short periods of time and not all day long. Since my children are used to this, when i say it's time to put them up they do with no fussing. The only time I allow it all day is on those rainy days when i just want to sit and watch movies. I also bought the v smile pockets and allow them to play those on long trips so they don't continually bug me while I'm trying to drive and it works perfectly, as a side note the v smile pockets also come with a cord to plug into the TV so you can get two in one, they can play it in the car and at home. Mine don't even get the console out anymore they always use the pockets.

I think you are right to be scared. Consider this: most of these "educational" products have no proven educational value, only the claims of the manufacturers, to back them. Certainly, they do not have more educational value than the time you spend with your child or the time she spends having actual, rather than virtual, experiences.
P. S. I notice Liev recommends THE PLUG-IN DRUG. A newer book along the same lines is Jane M. Healy's ENDANGERED MINDS.

We have a Vsmile and vsmile pockets for our two oldest kids. They play occasionally, then it's back to the paints and markers and colors. I agree with the other moms, it's really just up to you to set time limits on the game playing. I like the earlier idea of (poker) chips for a set amount of time. I don't find that my kids are STUCK to the TV, sometimes they really like it, then they forget that it exists!! But we do like the pocket ones for the truck for long trips. Good luck with your decision!

My daughter has made those purchases for our now 8 yo granddaughter since Isabella was 2 yo. The games w/the systems will also grow with the child getting more complex as they master each phase. The trick is to set time limitations. She also read to her and they would go play at the park. Isabella is a smart little girl and does really well in school. I attribute it to the different learning systems my daughter got her plus the one on one time they spend together.

You are the one who decides how much time she is allowed to spend in front of the tv, whether it's watching Sesame Street or playing a video game. Decide how long she is allowed to play, set a kitchen timer, and when the timer goes off, the game goes off, and she has to find something else to do.

Hi C.,
I've been thinking myself about a Leapster for my 4 year old (today is her 4th birthday.) Right now though, she is happy with what we have, one computer for the family. She loves pbskids.org and playhousedisney.com, we also have some JumpStart CD's from 1997 that my nephews had (they are now in Middle School.) Much of what is on these websites is educational-but its ok to play just for fun and they are learning how to use the computer and mouse and listen to instructions. I let my daughter play for 30 min a day (great chance for me to put her sister down for nap with no interruptions) and she's learned to navigate the websites and how to play the games on her own-she amazes me! It will be fine as long as you set the boundaries from the start and she understands she can't play the video games all day long...
God Bless!

VSmiles are great! They really do learn alot and they are fun, my kids had one. Just limit "computer time".

It's a computer world and when your children grow up they will have to know computers. Getting them started early is a good idea.

I am not a computer game person at all, but I do see the benefits of it. It helps with hand/eye coordination, thinking skills, etc.

The world our kids are growing up in is nothing but computers so yes this will lead to other computer systems, but lean toward the "learning" aspect of it. Also, just limit their time on it.

T.

Yeah, that is exactly what we started out with a V-Smile. I swore I would never let my children have a video game system, but when the in-laws bought my boys one for Christmas I didn't want to be too stubborn. Big mistake, now they have a playstation (which I recently revoked :)) and a computer. V-Smile was all fun and games for awhile, but then they wanted bigger and better. So now I have blocked all internet websites, besides educational ones, and refuse to let them play video games. Also, our V-smile broke not long after having it. But you know what's best for your family. I tried it and didn't work for me and mine, but perhaps it could for yours. Good luck!

I don't know anything about gaming systems; however, I believe that if you choose not to, your child will be "left behind" when she reaches Kindergarten. I am awed what these youngsters can do with computers now -- I can not imagine a home without a computer! There are so many good things this "age" has brought to us -- we somoetimes over look that because of all the "bad".

Since you are worried about the "indoor" problem, you'll not let it happen. I agree, many parents use these games, etc as babysitters!

I gave my son one of those first game systems because he had eye/hand motor control issues (he was a premie). We shot down lots of those ducks together .... this was waaaay before the complex games of today. It worked great -- along with other activities we did together (for an example -- rather than a ball to practice catch, we played with a balloon since it did not come at him fast enough to continually miss it.)

Good luck with your decision. It seems it gets harder, rather than easier, to avoid some problems of rasing children these days.

i wouldn't. i have heard that it "wires" the brain to expect instant stimulus, kind of sets it on hyper speed, which slows down other slow moving type activities later on, like learning to read, and can damamge communication skills as well. not that i think the little v smiles are evil or anything, but there is so much time later in her life for technology. i say, set her preferences now, for outdoor activities, crafts, playdoh and pretend, and then later on, as she gets older she can make better choices about playing video games. kind of like teaching her lo like healthy foods before you ever give her sweets.

My son got the v smile system for christmas last year not long after his 4th birthday. He loves it and there are times when he plays it regularly. Has it made him an indoors child, no way!! He also plays some video games on my computer which i monitor the games and the time allowed. He has learned so much it is unbelievable. I've been selling clothing on the internet for five years now and he can probably work a computer better than i can. Also, the games are great leverage for punishment or reward. I only let him play his video games at night if he has eaten a good supper and been completely cooperative with bath and such. I can't begin to tell you how far ahead of other children his age he is and i think that in part it is due to his vast experience with the computer and the v games are great. In fact, he will be getting new games for both birthday and christmas this year. However, he is definately an outside child!! In fact, sometimes, the games help me when i need him to be inside so that i can tackle things that need to be done and can't be watching him outside. My advice is to buy the system, she will love it and learn from it. Just monitor the time allowed. Well, there's my advice.
Have a lovely day and god bless!!

I have already bought the v smile but I haven't let them use it for the same reason I have 4 year old twin girls I will watch for your responses

My question would be...why are you considering it? Is she asking for it? Do you think it would help her learn something? Is it just cool? If she's not asking for it, my personal thoughts are to wait. Before you know it she will be asking for one, or something similar. Or, if she is asking for one, just be sure to limit the time she can play with it and provide her lots of outside time you shouldn't have problems.

I get some of my info from "Einstein Never Used Flashcards: How Our Children Really Learn--and Why They Need to Play More and Memorize Less" by Roberta Michnick Golinkoff, Kathy Hirsh-Pasek, and Diane Eyer, and from John Rosemond's "Making the 'Terrible' Twos Terrific!" Even if the software is "educational," it's not encouraging the use of imagination or critical thinking. It's more passive than reading. I played some video games as a child that might be considered educational, but I learned more from reading books and talking with my mom and playing with objects rather than staring at a computer screen. Even young kids can get attached to the glowy box and think they're not able to entertain themselves without it.

I grew up watching TV and playing computer games, and I developed carpal tunnel syndrome at 19, and this restricts how much of my hobbies I'm able to do, and also restricts what new hobbies I might take up. Crochet and piano are out; I try to save my wrists for writing, cooking and baking, and cross-stitch. And I'm determined never to buy a game console for my children. My son rarely watches TV, which has required a change in my own habits, but at 14 months he is able to entertain himself for quite long periods of time, sometimes up to 30 minutes, which astonishes my mother. (He's also remarkably social.) So - maybe let him start developing a hobby, rather than take up video games. You may end up spending less, plus get a child who suffers less from boredom and is able to problem-solve better. :)