Photo by: Caccamo

Life's Too Short Not To...

Photo by: Caccamo

I never told a soul. Far as I know, no one knows. Till now.

Back in my college days – some three decades ago – I decided to cut classes one morning and head for the beach instead of the books. It was one of those bright, balmy, eighty-degree days for which San Diego is famous. Sapphire-blue, sun-soaked. Postcard-perfect. Especially for playing hooky.

I didn’t plan on bailing out of Western Civilization and Physical Anthropology 101. But I found myself chugging down the I-8 in the exact opposite direction of Mr. Asmov’s lecture hall. To put this in context, it was one of two days I “played hooky” in my entire scholastic career. I’m more of the “nose-to-the-grindstone” type. Steady. Responsible. Reliable. As impetuous and impulsive as a gimpy snail in a molasses factory.

So why did I suddenly decide to do something as utterly uncharacteristic as spend a gorgeous sunny southern California day at Point Loma, a peninsular seaside community separating San Diego Bay from the Pacific? I’m not entirely sure. Maybe I was tired of being “responsible and reliable.” Maybe I was in a rut and wanted to stir some spontaneity into my schedule. Maybe I wanted to “carpe diem.” Seize the day. Instead of the other way around.

It was a day worth seizing – wading, beachcombing, sand castle-building, tide-pooling. Soaking up some rays. Lunching under swaying palms. Sucking in huge chunks of salt-spiced sea spray. (Okay, I also finished two essays, a book report, studied for exams and updated my Day Planner to a year out. Nobody’s perfect.)

Know what I discovered on that hooky day at Point Loma? Playing hooky is fun. Delicious. I don’t remember diddly from most of my lecture notes or Day Planner, but I remember that “hooky day” like it was yesterday. There was something about seizing the day that was… soul-stretching. Refreshing. Recharging. Energizing. Effervescent.

I loved it.

I celebrate my fiftieth birthday in a couple days. It feels weird. Like I should fee… different somehow. Older. Wiser. “Mature.” Whatever that means. On one hand I feel I’m way too young to be that old. I mean, my mom was fifty! On the other, it seems my half-century status is supposed to result in pearls of wisdom and sage sagacity. Kind of like a modern Oracle of Delphi.

Truth is, I’ve never gotten the hang of that oracle thing. Most of what I’ve learned and gleaned in my five decades isn’t all that earth-shattering: Put God first. Honor your parents. Love your spouse. Hug your kids. Work hard. Serve. Eat chocolate. They say “you’re only as old as you feel,” which probably puts me somewhere in the Sesame Street demographic. Also, “age is all in your head.” Or hair. Or hips. Or… joints?

But like I was saying, “the big 5-0” feels weird. Like I’m suddenly fair game for the other half of that famous “Titus 2” equation. Well. I’m not exactly turning cartwheels over that “older woman” bit. There are still plenty of other “olders” out there, thank you very much. And if they’re real “olders,” I’ll pass.

Maybe you know the type. They rehearse their daily litany of moans and groans, aches and pains with the regularity of day following night. They’ve kept records of all the people who’ve wronged them over the years. They’re gonna get even one of these days. Or they spend so much time resting on their laurels and looking back at “the good ‘ole days” that “carpe diem” would give them whiplash.

These are the folks who take life and faith dead serious and you better too, bub, if you know what’s good for you. Wait a minute. This phenomenon isn’t unique to the Geritol crowd, is it? Some things transcend age:

  • Comparing kids, outfits, income and accessories so the other person always gets short shrift
  • Mammoth-sized me-ism
  • Excising “I’m sorry” from vocabularies like it’s malignant
  • Crammed closets compensating for shallow souls
  • External busyness hiding internal barrenness

There’s a sure-fire antidote to the above. It goes like this: carpe diem. Seize the day. Reach out. Get real. Laugh. Apologize. Live your life rather than a knock-off version of someone else’s. Hold hands. Play hooky once in a while. Grab your kids and scarf down that second banana split, guilt-free. (If you can’t find your kids or don’t have any, borrow some. Jesus did.)

While I’m hoping the cost of cake candles doesn’t break the bank this year, I have some regrets from the past 18, 262 days. Some shoulda-woulda-couldas. But I’ve never regretted that hooky day. Don’t tell anyone, but I sometimes wish I’d taken more.

A few things I can tell you from my perch here in the middle-age rafters is that raspberry white chocolate cheesecake tastes better when it’s shared. Lucy and Ethel in the bon-bon factory deserve an Emmy. Toothpaste can’t be squeezed back into the tube. It’s amazing how much less I know at age 50 than I did at 18. Family, faith and friends matter most. Jesus is the same yesterday, today, and forever. And while sapphire-skied, sun-soaked days are perfect for playing hooky, carpe diem is for every day. Life’s too short not to.

Kristine Lowder has authored ten books and worked in public relations and marketing, strategic plans and market analysis, as a staff writer and editor for a private university, a Children’s Ministries Director, and in a variety of volunteer capacities. She and her husband live in the Pacific Northwest with their four sons and one incurably amiable yellow Lab, Eve.

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40 Comments

This is a great article, and JUST what I needed today! My oldest sister passed away suddenly last October; she was 50 years old. Since then I've been almost afraid to live my life. I think the point is that we ALL are going to die sooner or later; do I want to be able to say that I LIVED???
For now, I think I'll go make those peanut butter cookies my daughter has been asking for, that I've been "too busy" to make. Cookies for breakfast... carpe diem!

I love this... What Im hearing is my fav motto : We all are going to pass away , but not all will have LIVED! I want to really Live, and also really love ,be loved, and Life is definitly short.

I THINK YOU SHOULD LIVE LIFE AND HAVE FUN, YOU MAY NEVER KNOW WHEN YOUR TIME IS.LIVE UP AND ENJOY,LIFE IS TOO SHORT TO WASTE.

It's a very inspiring article..Life's too short..so enjoy it everyday!and Praise and thanks God each time you wake up alive..!

What a great reminder that one day minus the regular responsibilities, in the whole scheme of life, won't cause earth shattering catastrophy but it might, just maybe induce life altering refreshment!

Thanks for the insight, maybe I'll follow your lead. Although Point Loma might be a little far to drive in a day from Chilliwack BC Canada ;)

Very uplifting and very true. I also am approaching the big 5-0 and I really can relate to everything Kristine wrote about. Since 1996 I've been reading Sarah Ban Breathnach's "Simple Abundance" it's a wonderful way to live life. In 2007 I was certified(by Sarah) to teach her workshops to women...

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I TOTALLY support this mind set! Aprox. 7yrs. ago my oldest son (presently a SGT.in the Army) got a tat "Carpe Diem", latin:seize the day! Who says "you can't teach an old dog new tricks?" It was then I realized...life is too darn short-so seize the day!!!!

Chloe, We need to connect...you have the same energy as I do. Have a great day and Carpe Diem

This was a very inspiring article. I really enjoyed it. The funny thing is as of March 12, 2010 I decided to quit my job and do something I've been wanting to do all my life. When I read the part God is the same yesterday, today and forever was a confirmation that I am doing the right thing. Live is to short and now I am ready to live. Thank you!

Now is all that we have.

As a 53 year old Mom of an almost 16 Year old and a daughter of an 81 year old Mother, My comment is "DUDE! Enjoy this time you have until the last minute. I am a Christian, and thankfully, my family is also, so I know I will see them in Heaven. When life gets difficult - look for the good in every situation.

Remenber a quote: An Unhappy Woman feels she should be happy all the time. A Happy Woman understands she will ne unhappy sometimes.

Hope this helps and I Love you MAMAS!!!

Dearest Kristen,
Thankyou for the beautiful article.
you have soothed my soul and made my heart glad. I don't feel out of place simply because I don't want to act the media's version of the "matrue" woman. By the way I'm a PNW woman also. Aren't we awesome! Of course every woman is!

its time i live my life, my life was dragging by and your right god is the same so thank god every day I was very inspired and am going skiing. yeah!

I loved your story. What a incredible memory you have from that 1 day you completly enjoyed yourself. We all need to do 1 thing in life that maybe we shouldn't like miss work for a day and go out and play. I too feel like a kid at 53.Life is what you make of it, you're doing great with yours. Thankyou for sharing...

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I have recently started living this way. I guess I needed to read this article this morning to make another decision and that is to go to Haiti. I have always wanted to do mission work and have had an excuse each time some group goes not to go. Life is too short and I have passed 50 by a few years. Time to stop making excuses and live life to the fullest. Thanks Kristine.

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