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Eight Reasons You Should Be #1 On Your To-Do List

Photo by: Wonderlane

Sometimes I feel like a broken record, constantly advocating the benefits of self-care and how it has transformed my life over the last ten years.

But this past week confirmed that this message is one we all need to hear, over and over again.

I recently led a workshop for woman entrepreneurs at all life stages on how to work less and experience more. I call this approach the Empowered Entrepreneur —a topic I’m very passionate about.

Toward the end of the workshop, after covering a lot of essential ground related to running a small business, I touched on the importance of self-care; especially, for moms. And interestingly, this arena is where the most lively, passionate, emotional dialogue erupted.

They all seemed to grasp that self-care—cultivating an awareness for and responding to their physical/emotional/spiritual/mental needs—was fundamental to their well-being. And, they understood intellectually that they couldn’t build a business—much less function—when they were exhausted, harried, out of synch with themselves and running on empty.

But, were they ready to change their behavior and mindset to be more compassionate, nurturing and responsive to their deepest needs?

My ah-ha moment and initial motivation to learn more about self-care (read The Transformative Power of Self-Care from my book), came after having my son and realizing how vital it was for me to teach him to honor and nurture himself—something my sweet mother who battled depression most of her life, was never able to teach me.

What will it take for you to make this shift?

Consider the following “gifts from self-care” I’ve received over the years. When we renew ourselves by attuning and responding to our needs:

1. We feel more generous and can avoid building resentments toward others who demand our energy and time.

2. We naturally feel more loving, which makes us better friends, partners, parents and more enjoyable to be around!

3. We validate and honor our own worth, our essence, which naturally enhances confidence and self-esteem and lowers susceptibility to depression and anxiety.

4. We feel more alive and whole; we’re able to function at our best and do more of the things we want to do.

5. We renew and restore our energy supply and create energy reserves so we’re able to weather unforeseen challenges more easily.

6. We’re more present and calm; we can respond wisely, intuitively and effectively to a variety of circumstances.

7. We begin to step into our personal power (realizing our potential), which is our birthright.

8. We feel good on the inside, which leads to looking good on the outside. Nurturing your essence—inside and out—promotes well-being and vitality.

SUMMER SELF-CARE CHALLENGE

I invite you for the next thirty days to begin to become aware of how you’re feeling and what you need. Try a quick body scan before you even step out of bed in the morning. Just lie there for a moment and check in with your physical and emotional health. Are you overscheduled, do you need to lighten your load? Do you need to move your body or spend more time in nature? Are you dehydrated or are you eating something that is not enhancing your energy level? Do you need to say “no” to something or ask for help? Do you need to build in a day or evening to just rest (A radical concept, I know!). I have been focusing on self-nurturance for ten years and I still have a long way to go. But, hands down, this has been the most life-changing practice I have ever embraced. And the gifts that come from cultivating more compassion and love for myself, continue to greet me daily. I’d love to hear your comments around the theme of self-care. Cancer survivor Audre Lorde says it best, “Self-care is not about self-indulgence, it’s about self-preservation.”

Renée Peterson Trudeau is a nationally-recognized career/life balance coach, president of Career Strategists and the author of the award-winning The Mother’s Guide to Self-Renewal: How to Reclaim, Rejuvenate and Re-Balance Your Life. Thousands of women around the U.S./Canada are joining and becoming trained to lead Personal Renewal Groups based on the Guide, as a way to enhance balance and well-being in their lives.

Editor’s note: Leave your thoughts and comments below and you could be a lucky winner of Renée’s book The Mother’s Guide to Self Renewal: How to Reclaim, Rejuvenate and Re-Balance Your Life.

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39 Comments

I feel like I've just begun the journey of self care after 16+ years of motherhood. Still fight the urge to forgo my own needs for those of my family, but life is about babysteps and my first babystep is a weekly yoga class with the hope of also making it a daily practice at home.

This is an exellent post. I couldn't have read this at a better time! Very encouraging. Being home with 3 children this summer and working from home, we've had many challenging days. I do long to be more compassionate & nurturing towards my children, but it makes sense that it needs to start with ourself, duh?

This is a great article and something I have practiced for many years and am often trying to communicate to other Moms and friends of mine. I read something once that really made it make sense to me and I use it all the time when talking to others (a bit of an a-ha moment), "it's just like when you're in an airplane and the safety instructions tell you to put your mask on first and then attend to your child." After all, if you're not healthy and breathing, you can't take care of anyone else.

I'm a gen Xer brought up with strong work ethics. I was adamant I did not want children growing up. I actually photocopied an article in my scrapbook RE: DINKS. I wanted a career, not a family.

Now that I'm in my career, I have a 3 and 6 year old. I feel like I'm failing my family. I am virtually opposite of your eight reasons. Between finances, mental illness, career and family...I'm surviving by repetition only.

Thanks for the continual reinforcement...

I really need to apply this concept to myself!! Unfortunately it's seems to be so difficult. A part of me knows that in order to be a better Mother, wife, friend, worker I have to take care of myself. The other part is constantly feeling guilty. I work part time and have help with my 2 y/o and 8 months old almost every day. I usually take care of one or the other when I'm at home. I just feel so... guilty for having help and still feeling exhausted...

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I really need to apply this concept to myself!! Unfortunately it's seems to be so difficult. A part of me knows that in order to be a better Mother, wife, friend, worker I have to take care of myself. The other part is constantly feeling guilty. I work part time and have help with my 2 y/o and 8 months old almost every day. I usually take care of one or the other when I'm at home. I just feel so... guilty for having help and still feeling exhausted...

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Thanks so much for your supportive work. I am a mother of two young boys and a part-time physician. I used to dance professionally, and I know that I need to continue dancing to nurture and renew myself so that I may care for my family and patients. I protect my 1-2 dance classes a week wholeheartedly. What I have found so frustrating is that most people, even other working mothers, see this as a bonus rather than a necessity...

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I think there is such a need for balance. I know I have lost that with the birth of my special needs daughter. She is 5 now and I am just starting to think of me a little and not all the doctors and therapists and fighting for the various treatment she needs. I knew I had let things get too off balance when I looked in the mirror a few weeks ago and didn't recognize the woman staring back at me.

I am a new mother, my son is 17months old and Im trying to learn self care. I almost feel like I dont know where to begin. I thought that taking care of my son would be a piece of cake until I had him! I have done 7 years working with children and behavioral modification, but when your on the inside looking out its a completely different ball game...

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